Chapter Twelve:
"Gah!"
"Tats, you're going the wrong way. Go the other way. The other way! How did you jump off the map, that's not even supposed to be possible!?"
"I don't know! How do you control this thing!?"
"Press the joystick in the other direction."
"What the fuck is a joystick!?"
"It's the thing you can move around, no, those are buttons."
"You can move all of them–The fuck are you laughing at King!? I shove this thing so far down your throat you will be shitting plastic!"
So apparently, Saitama and King had indeed not fought. At least, not how Tatsumaki imagined it. Instead, they opted for a slightly less violent alternative. Video games. When King opened the door to his suite, she had been ready to summon a tornado of psychic fury that would obliterate the resort and everything in a dozen mile radius. But when he invited them inside, albeit slightly concerned about the green lightning buzzing from Tatsumaki's fingers, and she saw the enormous TV booted up with beaming lights and booming sounds, she quickly realized she had it wrong. Good thing she had waited, or Sitch would be very mad at her. If he survived.
King and Saitama got to playing, and it was clearly evident that King was in fact a better video game player. That put Tatsumaki's heart at ease. Sure, King may hold the title 'Strongest Man Alive,' but Saitama was no man. He was a god.
Seeing Saitama's frustration over not being able to beat King was fun. They had been playing for a while and Saitama had not won a single match. Tatsumaki had to smother a few giggles at Saitama's exclamations. She had a reputation to uphold after all. But seeing the strongest being on the planet getting so riled up over something so trivial was infinitely amusing. Then of course Saitama asked her if she wanted to play, and she really didn't, but she also was pretty bored so…
"How are you going up? That is the ceiling. Stop. Whatever you're doing, just stop."
"I'm not doing anything!"
"Clearly you are."
"Your dumb game is broken!"
"No it's–and you just killed yourself again. Jeez. Tats, no, that doesn't mean you can break King's TV. Put it down."
"But–"
"Down."
"Ugh. Fine. Stupid thing wasn't worth it anyway."
King watched this encounter with and equal measure of terror and amusement. The great Tornado of Terror, sitting on his couch, screaming at a character on the screen. Never in his life had he imagined something ever happening. It was straight out of every otaku's dream. Well except his. He knew how this would end.
But surprisingly, he had not been torn limb from limb, or had his DNA rewritten until he looked like a mutated spider-monkey, or been force-fed to the nearest monster. Instead, she was calmly sitting and playing video games. Well, as calm as the Tornado of Terror could be.
"You fucking useless piece of junk! I will find whoever made you and turn them inside out and feed them to their parents!"
She was acting surprisingly civilized. All of his belongings were still intact after fifteen minutes of playing. King suspected it was the presence of Saitama, though he wasn't sure why that was. Was Saitama also some kind of psychic and was protecting his stuff? He should probably thank Saitama later. If he survived of course.
King had resigned himself to sitting on the bed, behind the two strongest heroes and praying he does not attract their attention. Sure, Tatsumaki seemed docile now, but he had seen what she could do if provoked. Even unprovoked, one risked a trip to the ER if they were in the Tornado's path. The best he could hope for was that she forgot he was here and left soon. Hopefully without destroying anything, but King didn't believe in miracles. Curses, though, curses he was sure were real.
However, the next hour passed without incident. Tatsumaki got–a little–better at the game, and her frustrated screaming only happened once every few minutes instead of a few times every minute. Every time she did, King flinched, expecting something to explode. She did destroy one of his lamps, but nothing else really. It was amazingly, relatively calm.
The calm ended the moment someone pounded on the door. The room went dead silent except for the beeping coming from the television. When no one answered, another round of pounding echoed in the room.
Tatsumaki grit her teeth. "I am going to turn that piece of shit into scrap metal."
"Hey King, it's your room, wanna get the door?" Saitama asked, still focused on the game.
"Y-yeah," King said, trying to calm his racing heart. Luckily, it wasn't audible.
King opened the door to see Genos standing outside. "Greetings King-sama. Is Master Saitama in your room?"
"Stop calling me master!" Saitama shouted.
"Yes," King answered.
"May I come in?" Genos asked.
"Of course," King said, getting out of the cyborg's way. Genos walked into King's apartment and promptly stood next to Saitama.
"Sensei, my reboot is complete," Genos announced.
"Congratu-fucking-lations you turdbot, now can you get out of my way? You're blocking my vision," Tatsumaki said.
"I am positioned in a manner that would not obstruct your line of vision," Genos said icily.
"I can see you, you're in my fucking way," Tatsumaki growled.
"Tats, be nice," Saitama said, earning him a snarl. "So you're all set, huh? What time is it?"
"It is currently 6:02 pm," Genos announced.
"We should probably get dinner soon, huh. They're doing some fireworks thing tonight, right?" Saitama asked.
"Hai Sensei, it is in your honor," Genos replied.
"Of course it is. Alright, Imma go get changed, I'll meet you all down there in a few. Come on Genos," Saitama said, getting up from the couch.
"But–what about the game?" Tatsumaki asked. It was so quiet it was barely audible.
"I'm sure King would let us finish tomorrow, right King?" Saitama asked.
"O-oh yeah, sure, sure," King said.
Saitama walked out, quickly followed by Genos. Tatsumaki stared after them for a minute, the faint beeping of the videogame echoing in the background. Suddenly his window exploded. Tatsumaki glared at him. "If you tell anyone about this, I will remove your eyes, ears, nose and tongue, rearrange all the organs in your body then spin you around and leave you in the middle of a monster pit." And then she was gone.
King breathed a sigh of relief. He had survived. There were a couple moments he was sure he was dead, but he was alive!
King looked around the room. A broken window and a broken lamp. Honestly, not terrible. It could have been a lot worse. He probably should ask someone for a broom though.
Saitama watched the night sky expressionlessly. The stars out here seemed so much brighter than in Z-City. Must be the lack of light pollution. Even in the abandoned zone, there was plenty of light to brighten the sky. But this was a relatively remote area. There was no one besides them around for miles, and the normally soft lighting had been dimmed even further to give them this view. Saitama couldn't help but smile up at the sky. He had faced some truly epic things, from enormous monsters to beings from alternate dimensions. But the light from distant stars reminded him that there was still so much more out there. It had been a comfort for him to realize that. Sure he might be the toughest dude on earth. He had come to terms with that a long time ago. But that didn't mean there wasn't more out there. Hell, he had experienced some of it first hand. That spaceship the other day had been more proof of that. That alien guy could claim all he wanted about being the "ultimate life form" or whatever, but Saitama doubted he had explored every corner of the universe. There had to be something out there that could challenge him. Maybe someday it would find him. In the meantime, Saitama had found it better to enjoy the smaller things, like couponing or a good manga. Which reminded him, there was a sale for Ikura in two days. Shame they were only going to be here for another day. The food here was really good. And free.
"What is taking so long?" A shrill voice cried. Saitama sighed. And there went his peaceful thoughts.
"I'm sure they're just setting it up," Zombieman assured the petite esper. All of the assembled heroes and executives had gathered behind the resort to watch some firework show. Genos, Bang, Tatsumaki, Metal Bat and Zombieman were standing near him while everyone else was off to his left.
"Yeah well they could do it faster," Tatsumaki grumbled.
"Just be patient, Tatsumaki," Bang said.
"I am being patient!" Tatsumaki retorted. "They're lucky I haven't gone over and done it all myself! If they wanted to be slow about it, then they shouldn't waste my time!"
"I don't think they really cared about your opinion when they planned this," Metal Bat chimed in.
"And I didn't ask for your opinion!" Tatsumaki exclaimed.
"I didn't ask for yur goddamn attitude but here we are!" Metal Bat retorted.
Before the argument could escalate, a whistling sound announced a sparkling dot that rose from behind a small hill. As it reached the peak of its flight, it exploded in a brilliant display of light. Dozens more rockets quickly followed, showering the sky in thunder and light. Light displayed each of the S-Class in turn, depicting some in battle, while others just had their outlines burned into the sky. Finally they came to Saitama. His likeness was bigger than the rest, with the words BLAST illuminated beneath it.
Saitama frowned. "Don't you think that name sounds a little pretentious?"
"I think it fits," Tatsumaki said.
"Well yeah, your name is the Tornado of Terror," Metal Bat said. "Hard to get more pretentious than that."
"Well at least they didn't just look at me and see the only defining feature and give me that! What kind of name is Metal Bat anyway!? Stupid fucking pompadour motherfucker!" Tatsumaki snapped.
"Oi! Don't make fun of my name shortstack!" Metal Bat shouted.
"The fuck you call me?" Tatsumaki demanded.
"Girls, girls, you're both pretty," Atomic Samurai called.
"Shut up old man!" Both Metal Bat and Tatsumaki shouted back at the same time.
"I am trynna watch though," Saitama spoke up.
Immediately the argument died. The fireworks continued for a few more minutes before it came to the finale, an enormous mural of all the S-Class engraved in light. Saitama clapped along with most of the other S-Class. Tatsumaki did not seem amused.
"I could do better," she said, lifting her head in disdain.
"Tatsumaki, these people have put a lot of time and effort into this display for us, do not be disrespectful," Bang admonished.
"Ugh," Tatsumaki rolled her eyes, but clapped weakly.
"You can make light?" Saitama asked. "Never seen an esper do that before. All of them just chuck rocks or shoot energy at me or something."
"Light? That's nothing for me. I could probably make it look like daytime if I wanted," Tatsumaki boasted.
"That's actually a cool power. You know, if an esper used that on me they might have won," Saitama mused.
"What!? Of course not! No one can beat you!" Tatsumaki declared.
"Hm. Well I can't punch something I can't see, now can I?" Saitama said. "Now that I think about it, Genos don't you have an ability like that?"
"Hai Sensei! My lightning eye ability emits a powerful burst of light that is capable of stunning and blinding an opponent. I used this ability in my battle against the Deep Sea King," Genos reported.
"Ah. You get some good hits in?" Saitama asked.
"I was able to complete a series of machine gun blows on my opponent before he recovered," Genos said.
"Good for you. Did you defeat this monster? No? Fucking weakling. What's the point of an ability if it doesn't let you defeat your enemy?" Tatsumaki snapped.
"If your opponent is stronger than you, one cannot rely on brute force to strike them down," Bang said. "It is best to have numerous ways of combating opponents, else you may find yourself overwhelmed."
"Or you could just get stronger," Tatsumaki said.
"Inevitably, you will come across someone stronger than you," Bang said.
"Let's hope," Saitama whispered.
Tatsumaki just huffed and turned away. After the display had ended, most of the people gathered were preparing to head back inside. Some were chatting, but others like Flashy Flash and Drive Knight practically booked it for their rooms. Amai Mask was speaking to three of the executives, his arms spread wide for some strange reason. The business dudes were into it though.
"If you don't like the name Blast, what would you want as your hero name?" Zombieman mused. None of the posse surrounding Saitama had gotten up. He didn't exactly want them there, but hey it was their vacation too, and he wasn't tired yet.
"Hm, I never really thought about it. Figured I'd just stick with my name," Saitama shrugged.
"Nah that's lame," Metal Bat said. "Get a manly name like Red Death, or Powerman."
"Those are fucking terrible," Tatsumaki snapped.
"Oh yeah? Like you could do better," Metal Bat challenged.
"God Killer," Tatsumaki stated.
Metal Bat paused. "Okay, that's manly as hell."
"I never killed a god before," Saitama said.
"Okay, well, what about One Punch Man?" Tatsumaki said.
"You shitting me? And I thought Blast was pretentious," Saitama groaned.
Metal Bat laughed and Tatsumaki blushed. "Shut up! If they use the same formula they did for you, they'd call him something stupid like Caped Baldy!"
A look of horror came over Saitama's face. "They wouldn't dare."
Tatsumaki was quick to refute herself. "Not that they ever would for you, Saitama! You're obviously a lot more important than some random dude that swings a pipe around."
"Oi! This thing's got more monster blood on it than your dress, so get off your high horse and go fuck yourself!" Metal Bat snapped.
"I kill way more monsters than you jackass! You think your tiny fucking stick does more damage than me!? Don't make me laugh!" Tatsumaki yelled. Bang tried to step in, but neither heard the man. Zombieman just slowly backed away while Genos powered up his Incineration cannons.
"You wanna see how much damage it does you shitty brat?" Metal Bat snarled.
"The fuck you call me?" Tatsumaki shrieked.
"You heard me, you fucking overhyped pipsqueak!" Metal Bat screamed.
Before Tatsumaki could reply, Saitama intervened.
"Oi! Shut the hell up! I was having a nice night, then you come and start screaming," Saitama complained.
"Sorry Saitama," Tatsumaki mumbled, an embarrassed blush on her face.
"Tch, whatever dude," Metal Bat said, crossing his arms, holding his trademark bat under his armpit. Saitama couldn't imagine that being comfortable. Tatsumaki clenched her fist, but fortunately said nothing. Saitama sighed. Peace at last.
Metal Knight watched the bald man from the shadows. Most of the heroes not accompanying Saitama had left. All that remained were Amai Mask, who was speaking to a few board members, and Darkshine, who also seemed to be scrutinizing Saitama, though for what purpose, Bofoi could not guess.
Bofoi did not like how quickly Saitama had gained a following in the S-Class. The fools seemed drawn to him, magnetized by the sheer volume of his power. Before even coming to this place, Saitama already had Bang and Genos under his thrall, and unknowingly Tatsumaki. And in the two days he had spent here, he had captured the attention of the rest. Though he did not know the nature of the altercation Saitama had with King, it seemed the two had grown close. And Zombieman and Metal Bat seemed intent on doing the same.
He was quickly gaining the trust, support and friendship of the S-Class. The most dangerous humans on the planet. And some of the most influential. If some of these individuals truly tried, they could rally a legion of fellow heroes and civilian followers. Amai Mask presented the most dangerous threat on that front, though Bofoi feared the influence Tatsumaki held over the common folk. Though humanity looked at all of the S-Class with wonder and amazement, the people saw Tatsumaki as a goddess. They worshiped her, they would believe every word she said and die for her if she asked. She may not know it, but she was the most dangerous of the S-Class in more ways than one.
The thought of an alliance between Amai Mask and Tatsumaki was enough to send shivers down his spine. Although their vastly different personalities and ideologies would clash, Bofoi knew that enough time in Saitama's presence would create an opportunity for such a thing to occur. And if they were to campaign against Bofoi, it would very quickly turn ugly for him.
Then of course, there was Saitama himself. If the worst were to come, and Saitama was pitted against him, what could be done against the bald titan? It was likely that his machines would be of little use. If Bofoi's suspicions that Saitama had barely even tried against the S-Class, his machines mine as well be cardboard. If brute force could not work, he would need another way to put down the bald hero.
The night before, Bofoi had seen Saitama consuming sake, though the alcohol did not have as prominent an effect on the bald man. Ever the scientist, Bofoi needed to discover if Saitama's resistance or immunity to alcohol was transferred to drugs and poisons. Before he ate dinner, Bofoi had slipped a small poison into his food. It wasn't a particularly powerful toxin, usually only inflicting its victims with nausea and vomiting for a day. It was however a fast acting poison, affecting the person within fifteen minutes. And yet, several hours after the meal had concluded, Saitama had yet to show any symptoms.
Bofoi frowned. He liked having contingencies for every possible scenario. At the moment, there were an army of stealth drones observing the surrounding mile, as well as the road leading to the resort. He had ways of taking down every member of the S-Class, from Tatsumaki to Zombieman. He had files about every member of the Hero Association, from the Board of Directors to the branch coordinators. Bofoi did not like feeling powerless. He may have a failsafe for preventing Saitama from collapsing the Hero Association, but if Saitama came after him, he should have a way to take him down.
Of course, if Saitama came after him, it would likely mean most of the S-Class would come after him as well. Which, while that posed a significant threat on its own terms, it also meant that the rest of humanity would turn against him as well.
Bofoi inwardly sighed. How much now rested on the shoulders of a singular man. The best course of action would be to keep Saitama in the dark. He did not need to know about the true machinations of the Hero Association or his own work. Saitama would not look too deeply unless someone showed him. While Amai Mask had the capability, it seemed he shared Bofoi's sentiment of keeping Saitama out of the loop. No, the true danger was Child Emperor. The boy had been snooping around, digging up secrets that should rather stay buried. He was far from learning anything critical, but Bofoi couldn't hide it from the boy forever. He needed a solution to Child Emperor.
Hm. Perhaps he should consider becoming more separate from the Hero Association. He was far too invested in this whole operation anyway. He had bigger things to worry about. If the Hero Association were to fall, he did not want to be dragged down with it.
For now though, he would sit back and watch. He would play Amai Mask's pathetic little game. But one thing was certain. The game had changed. He would adapt, and soon, all the cards would be back in his hand.
