.:.Hellfire.:.
Summary: Yami no Malik and Yami no Bakura have been sent to Hell. And they're about to drag their hikaris down with them.
Chapter 6: In Which Yami is Greatly Shocked
Bakura woke up the next day warm and definitely better than he had been– well, in a long time.
He opened his eyes and quickly shut them again when light streamed in, burying his face in the pillow. The pillow moved.
Holding back a yelp- that was what RYOU would do, not him- Bakura opened his eyes again, more slowly this time. He found himself face-to-face with Mariku. The other one-time-spirit looked softer when he was sleeping; more like his hikari, rather than the vengeful incarnation of his hikari's pain.
Of course the position became more difficult when he realized that the pillow was actually said hikari, and his own hikari was snuggled happily in between himself and Mariku, one leg wrapped over him possessively. It was one big jumble of limbs and, as the first one awake, there was no way to extricate himself.
A pair of large, innocent, jewel-lined red eyes appeared above him.
"Is it okay if we make breakfast?" Ukemi asked, very softly so as not to wake the others.
"Ano... sure." he replied, giving the child an odd look. Really, why ask him? It wasn't like Bakura would care if they wrecked the kitchen- Ra knew how many times he himself had done so.
"Thank you! Should I come wake you up when we're done? It's just, you look so comfortable."
Comfortable! Bakura wanted to scream. This looks comfortable to you! And yet, he realized, stemming the flowing tide of heat to his face, it wasn't actually physically uncomfortable.
"Umn, sure." he said. The little thing ran off.
Now, what to do? Put quite simply, nothing. Bakura drifted back to sleep.
Not ten minutes later, he was awakened by a gentle shake. He started when he realized that it was Ryou rolling into him to avoid Ukemi rather than the child himself.
"Mn... I don't wanna get up, five more minutes 'sis-nee-sama..." came the voice of his pillow as Malik curled around his head. Mariku was pulling Ryou off Bakura as he clung to the white haired hikari as if he was an anchor to sleep. Bakura tried to sit up and realized Malik was on his hair.
"I don't think there's ever been a less restful atmosphere, anywhere!" he growled, extricating his hair from underneath Malik.
"Mn... what!" Mariku awoke with a start.
"Welcome to the world of the living, Mariku. Now finish what you started and pull this lazy hikari off me."
Ukemi blinked wide eyes at them, a pair of cooking chopsticks in hand.
"Umn... breakfast is ready." he said almost guiltily.
"What is that squirt still doing here?" Mariku demanded.
"I dunno, Mariku, why don't you ask him?" Bakura said tiredly. "That was sarcasm, you psycho." he added when the blonde was about to. "Now make Ryou stop using me as a stuffed animal; he and Malik have been playing tug of war with me all night, it seems."
The dark spirit sniggered at him, but happily pulled Ryou into his lap as if he were a rag doll.
"Malik, get up right now before you're grounded into the afterlife!" Bakura said in his best imitation of the female Ishtar. Malik bolted upright, lavender eyes wide and searching before settling on Bakura.
"'Kura!" he screeched. "Don't do that! You wanna give me a heart attack!"
"Of course." Bakura said smugly.
"Why are you all in my bed?" came Ryou's sleepy voice.
"Why do you think, yadonushi? We all got drunk last night and had wild crazy smex, don't you remember?" Bakura asked cruelly. Malik stared at him a moment before Mariku's wild laughter broke the stunned silence.
"...Bakura, when did you learn the word 'smex?'" Ryou asked incredulously.
"From him." Bakura answered, pointing to Malik. "Remember that conversation you had in English class some... oh, I don't know how long ago. Time passes differently in the Shadow Realm."
"It's been about two month since you got banished..."
"Three months, nine days, and... 28 hours, as of now." Malik ticked off on his fingers.
"Guess we know who cares more about their yami." Bakura snorted.
"Umn... excuse me, but breakfast's going to be cold... or Daddy's going to eat it all." Ukemi's quiet comment broke into their conversation.
"Breakfast?" Mariku asked eagerly.
"Hey Ryou?" Malik asked.
"Yes?" was Ryou's quiet response, as the white-haired teen turned chocolate eyes that sparkled in the sun on him.
"Why are those two with us?"
The other boy blushed. (Malik really didn't know why- he'd learned not to question what made Ryou blush. He wondered briefly how much he'd blush if– Malik pushed that thought away, along with the thoughts about how Bakura let him call him 'Kura, and his attraction for his own darker half.)
"Well, apparently Ukemi is supposed to be keeping an eye on us, and since he refuses to leave his dad, Zangan is coming along too." Ryou admitted.
"Oh." That half made sense, actually. Who would have thought a four-year-old kid would make such a good cook? Or would be looking after his own father?
"Where are we going?" Ryou asked the two yamis for the hundredth time. Just like the other 99 times, all he got was a short, 'You'll see when we get there,' from Bakura.
"Why don't you try?" he pleaded to Malik. Malik had his own ideas about where they were going, but he was pretty sure he shouldn't tell Ryou.
"And get the same result?"
"Mariku talks more."
"No he doesn't, he's more honest. There's a difference."
"Yes, I guess there is. But he might tell you something!"
"Or 'Kura might cut him off, like the last nine times I tried."
"Well, I've tried a hundred, why don't you make it ten?"
"Fine, fine. 'Riku, where are we going?"
"You'll see!" Bakura answered before Mariku could so much as open his mouth. Malik shot Ryou an 'I told you so' look.
"Here we are!" Mariku announced. They gazed up... at the Kame Game Shop.
"Mariku..." Malik asked, stunned. "Why, in Hell, are we here, of all places?"
"To rub it in the Pharaoh's face that we have physical bodies and he doesn't, of course." Bakura answered, being accompanied by enthusiastic nodding from Mariku.
"Oh dear..." Ryou said.
"And of course, that we got out of the Void of the Shadow Realm." Mariku added. "Ring the doorbell, hikari-kin."
Malik rolled his eyes, but did as told. This promised to be amusing.
"Coming, just a minute!" came Yuugi's cheerful voice. "Yes?" The door was opened.
"Um, hi, Yuugi." Ryou said nervously.
"Hi, Ryou! And Malik... and... umn, who is that?" The smaller boy stared up at Zangan in awe.
"I am Zangan Kazan. That is the squirt." Zangan said simply, pointing to the small, black-haired copy of himself that was clinging to his pant leg with one hand and cuddling a plushie in another.
"Umn, well, that's Ukemi, Zangan's son." Ryou explained.
"Oh!" Yuugi exclaimed, much happier to look at the smaller creature, much closer to his own height rather than nearly double. "How old are you?"
"I'm three years old, but I'm in five-year-old form." Ukemi said shyly. Before Yuugi had a chance to question this, Bakura came out from behind Zangan's cloak.
"You're forgetting about us, Pharaoh's hikari."
"Huh- wha– Bakura!" Yuugi gasped.
"An' Mariku!" Mariku chimed, bouncing up behind Malik and resting his chin in his hair.
"What is the meaning of this!" Yami demanded, taking over.
"Meaning? What meaning?" Mariku asked.
"We just thought we'd drop by and pay a little... visit." Bakura added with one of his bone-chillingly evil grins.
"What in hell are you doing out of the Shadow Realm!"
"Hell? Yes, Hell, right in one." Mariku said.
"Just like the Pharaoh, always has to be right." Bakura taunted.
Yami glared.
"How did you escape the Void!"
"Well, that's a funny name for it, really."
"'Very deep pit' might work better."
"After all, 'Void' implies bottomless, and the Void sector is anything but."
Yami was becoming more and more agitated, nearly bouncing up and down in frustration.
"Explain yourselves!"
"Explain? What's to explain?"
Malik nearly laughed out loud at the look of pure frustration on Yami's face. Mariku and Bakura were working in perfect tandem to prevent the Pharaoh from gaining the upper hand.
"How exactly you managed to get out of the Void!" 'So I can take precautions when I send you there again!' was not vocalized, but quite clearly said.
"Well, you see, we can't tell you that."
"It would take all the fun out of this!"
"You might try looking in Hell for the answer, though." Malik added to their diatribe. Yami sputtered in disbelief, then stopped. He looked at Malik. Then the taller, grinning figure of Mariku. Then at Ryou, who was looking shame-faced at Bakura's actions, then at the lounging grave robber himself.
"How in Ra's name did you manage to get physical forms!" he nearly screeched, approaching the range known as 'falsetto.'
"Well, you'd have to go to Hell to find out." Bakura said easily, walking over and propping his chin on Malik's shoulder. "Like we said before."
"You're not going to put me off with curses." Yami said, voice lowered with great effort evident in his face.
"But we're not cursing!" Mariku chimed, pulling Ryou over to him. "Tell him, Ryou."
"It's true. They went to Hell." Ryou said softly. "And then somebody came to take us," (he motioned to Malik) "To Hell."
"Because we're... ah... what was the word they used? Insubstantial?" Malik added.
"Incomplete, hikari-kin." Mariku said.
Ryou nodded. "Malik nearly died."
"I was not that bad!" Malik protested. So maybe he had thought he was going to die once or twice, it wasn't like that was anything new.
"So why are you here?"
"Because someone we met in Hell... wants to take over the Earth."
Right... I finally remembered to upload this. :) So, what do you all think? I don't think there's any new wordsI might need to define... So here it is! (Review? -Gives puppy dog eyes- Please?)
