Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans… but my birthday is approximately seven months away…
A/N: I KNOW, I KNOW! I am terribly sorry for the delay on this chapter! One thing after another just kept coming up and I had to keep putting this off. The good news is this chapter is longer than any of the others by about two pages… a small consolation, I know… Anyway, as always, I have to say that REVIEWERS ROCK! I love you guys… even though I don't always let you know (:cough: making them wait two weeks for an update…) So I won't keep you any longer, but I have more to say at the end! I had a great time writing this chapter and I hope it's a good read! See you at the bottom!
Chapter 6: Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own
I'm so tired
But I can't sleep
Standing on the edge of something
Much too deep
It's funny how we feel so much
But cannot say a word
We are screaming inside
But we can't be heard
- I Will Remember You, Sarah McLachlan
Severing the bond of two demonic entities is a subject of great interest. Attempts to perform this daunting task have proven futile. There is no record of a successful separation. The weaker of the two is usually sacrificed…
Alette groaned in frustration, tossing Mysteries of Demonic Power into a continually growing pile of books that were not telling her what she needed to know. Discouraged by yet another dead end, Alette sprawled herself out on the itchy, eggplant-colored carpeting that covered the floor of her mother's room. Her vertebrae sung in gratefulness as they popped to relieve the stress they had experienced as Alette sat for hours in a hunched position, hovering over the words of hundreds of books. Her fingers, which had traveled through thousands upon thousands of worn pages, tugged on her arms, daring to reach the wall that was farthest from them. Her toes pointed as gracefully as a ballerina's until she could feel a stretch across the top of her feet. She wanted nothing more than to close her eyes, but she knew if she did she would not be getting up any time soon, and she did not have time to waste on sleep. In an attempt to keep her heavy lids from closing over her eyes, Alette brought her hands to her face and rubbed vigorously hoping that the action would give her a couple more hours to run on.
Rubbing them will only make it worse, Ali.
Alette's hands froze, still pulling on her skin. Slowly her fingers released their grip as she tried desperately not to dwell on the sound of Raven's voice in her head. Since her mother's actions (Alette could not bring herself to use the word sacrifice… sacrifices usually ended up dead.) three days before, little things like motherly phrases from when she was young had become increasingly distracting. Alette now understood the meaning of the phrase 'you don't know what you have until it's gone.' Raven was better at researching. She was the more patient, wiser one. Alette was failing her because she could not find a solution to their problem. If only Raven were there in the room, helping her… But Raven had to go and play the part of heroine and risk her life in order to save another the way any good crime fighter would have done.
"Bullshit," Alette hissed into the empty room. Somewhere inside of herself Alette knew she was being bitter and childish, but she also felt like she had a right to be these things. Her mother had been the only person in her life who had truly mattered, and Alette felt more empty now than she had ever before. Crime fighters, she guessed, were not supposed to have children.
"Come on, Alette. Get it together." Alette had taken to talking to herself much more than she usually did. For three days she'd chosen to stay locked up in Raven's old room, surrounding herself with any and every item that might provide her with an answer to her many questions. There had been a couple attempts on the part of the Titans to draw her out into the real world, but Alette refused to comply with their requests. The real world did not exist anymore, because in the real world, Raven would be here to help her figure everything out.
Lying on the floor, Alette vaguely wondered what time it was. How long, exactly, had she been in this room pouring over books with no sleep? She could not see the outside world because large, heavy black curtains were drawn over the expansive windows. Her body felt heavy and she wasn't sure if she would be able to get up from the floor. Almost without thinking her eyes slipped closed into sweet darkness and the thought Five minutes won't hurt… flitted across her brain as she fell asleep.
The rough, familiar sound of quill pen on parchment paper slowly drew Alette from her fitful slumber. Attempting to ignore the bothersome scratching, she pulled the pillow, with its cool silk casing, over her ears. While this action successfully dulled the grating noise, it also made Alette more aware than she had been before.
She didn't remember falling asleep on Raven's bed.
Alette shot straight up, no longer feeling groggy. Her eyes wildly scanned the dark depths of what seemed to be Raven's room. She had almost convinced herself that nothing was wrong and was on her way back down to the pillows when the irritating friction that had initially woken her up started again. Alette's eyes strained to see to the farthest corner of the room… where someone was sitting at the desk.
"Hello?" she asked tentatively, slipping out of the comfort of the bed in one graceful motion. In three quick strides she was standing behind the intruder and examining a somewhat familiar back. "M… Mom?" Alette stumbled, reaching her arm out to touch her mother's shoulder. Her fingers met nothing but air as they passed through Raven's body. "What?" Alette said, mystified. She examined her fingers as if they would provide some answers. When they did not, she looked closer at her mother.
Raven was dressed in a leotard and a blue cloak very similar to the one she'd been wearing when Alette last saw her. Her hair fell only to just above her shoulders, some strands gently caressing her chin. Moving to see Raven from the front, Alette noticed that her face, while unnaturally stoic, was still full of youthful vibrancy. And then Alette realized…
This was not her mother.
This was Raven, member of the Teen Titans.
This was a memory… her mother's memory.
Throughout all of Alette's examination, Raven had continued to write, her hand working expertly with the eloquent feather pen in her fingers. Alette watched for a few moments, mesmerized by the movements and the strokes rather than by the words actually being produced. It was only as Raven was finishing her entry with a flourish of her name that Alette realized she might want to look at what her mother had been writing.
Raven shut the journal with a soft thump just as Alette began to read the first line. Already devising a plan on how to get to the journal in a world where she was simply a spectator, Alette did not at first realize that Raven was staring at her. When she did catch her mother's gaze, she felt a cold shiver travel up from the base of her spine.
"Can you see me?" Alette whispered.
Raven only placed the journal in the top drawer of the desk. Alette heard her mother's voice, though it did not come from the teenager in front of her. Rather it echoed in the air surrounding Alette and Alette could feel the vibrations of the words all through her body. Alette, I'll never be far from reach. A soft wind played with Alette's black hair as she was reminded of her mother's parting words.
What did Raven want her to know?
In the silence of the dream, Alette strained to capture some meaning in the vision. Raven had sent her this specific memory for a reason… the journal. Could the answers Alette had been looking for be in the pages from so many years ago? Had Raven known that all of this was eventually going to happen?
Greedily she lunged for the drawer with the journal in it, but a wall of fire, faint enough to be an illusion, crept up from the carpet creating a barrier between Alette and Raven. Wondering if this too, was only a part of the memory, she reached forward to touch the flames. Her fingers tingled with the sensation of warmth, and Alette quickly pulled away.
We can't have this. You should know better, Raven.
The voice was low and booming and it too, came from no bodily figure. Alette clutched her burnt fingertips to her chest as she waited to see what would happen. Suddenly, her body became very hot, so hot that it felt as if she was burning from the inside out. Screaming, Alette fell to the floor, rolling around in an attempt to squash the unseen flames. The pain was more intense than anything she ever experienced before and just as she was planning on letting her body give out, it stopped. Though still numb, Alette did not think she had been seriously hurt.
Do not attempt to contact her again, Raven.
Raven's sad eyes looked at Alette from behind the fire. Her image began to fade, and Alette tried desperately to crawl towards her. "Mom, don't go! I… I don't understand… I can't do this without you…"
Alette…
Raven's voice was becoming as faint as her body.
Alette!
Alette paused, listening again to the sound of her name. It wasn't her mother's voice that called to her.
Alette!
"Alette! Alette, wake up!"
Beastboy and Cyborg hovered worriedly over Alette's thrashing body. Cyborg took her shoulders, gently holding her to the ground. "Come on girl, snap out of it."
Slowly, Alette's body stopped moving and her eyes blinked open as she continued to mumble, "Mom… don't go…" As she crept out of her grogginess, she became aware of Cyborg and Beastboy looking down at her with concern etched into every line of their faces. "Wha… what happened?" she questioned, climbing into a sitting position. The slight movement made her dizzy, and she steadied herself by placing both hands on the floor in front of her. Cyborg and Beastboy crouched down beside her.
"You tell us," Cyborg said gently.
"Yeah, we heard you screaming and we came to check on you. When you didn't answer we bypassed the door's lock and found you rolling all over the floor," Beastboy explained.
Alette held her head in her hands, attempting to remember the dream. Her mother had been there… and there had been something she wanted to show Alette… something Trigon did not want her to see…
"It was probably just a bad dream," Alette said, trying to appear calm. She reached for a book from the pile of those she still had to read while saying, "I haven't been getting a lot of sleep… but you guys can go now, I'm fine."
Cyborg and Beastboy did not try to hide the skeptical look they gave each other. "Ali," Beastboy began, "maybe you should take a break."
Alette shook her head. "I can't."
With a determined growl, Beastboy took Alette by the arm and pulled her up so she could stand on her feet. As he guided Alette to the floor length mirror in the corner of the room he instructed, "Cyborg, turn on the lights."
Cyborg did as he was told and the bright overheads temporarily blinded Alette. "Hey!" she cried indignantly, raising her arm to shield her eyes as she followed Beastboy. Her protest was ignored, however, and Cyborg met the pair at the mirror.
"Alette, look at yourself." Beastboy's voice sounded tired and strained.
Tentatively, Alette raised her eyes to meet her reflection. She failed to suppress a gasp of surprise as she looked at herself for the first time in three days. Her eyes, framed by identical dark circles, were decorated with red-veined spider webs. Her skin was pale to the point of being grey, making her look as if she was in her last days of life. Black locks hung limply in her face, dirty from having not been washed. Alette could not hold the gaze for long. She averted her eyes, finding the purple threads of the carpet much more interesting than the pitiful girl in front of her.
"You need to take a break," Beastboy said, turning Alette back around so she could look directly at his face. "You're going to make yourself sick."
"I can't," Alette repeated, pulling out of Beastboy's grasp.
"Reading until you can't see straight isn't the best strategy for saving Raven," Cyborg added. "You haven't eaten, slept, or bathed in three days and your body is showing signs of giving out."
Alette opened her mouth to continue protesting, but Beastboy took her by the wrist, dragging her towards the open door while Cyborg walked behind her, preventing her from backing away.
Alette struggled against Beatsboy's grip. "I don't have time to…"
"Alette!" Beastboy's raised voice was enough to stun Alette into silence. "You're the only chance we have at getting Raven back safely. We all know that you're discouraged because Raven's not here and we know you're worried. But we all are. Raven was our friend. She was our family. So if we can't help fix the problem, we need to make sure that the only person who can is taken care of. Do you understand?"
Alette looked at Beastboy for a moment, noting that his eyes, too, had their own faint black frames. "Okay, Beastboy, I'll take a break. A short one."
Beastboy allowed a relieved smile to cross his face and Cyborg patted Alette's shoulder in encouragement and gratitude. "First," Beastboy said, continuing to drag Alette down the hallway, "take a bath. Cyborg was just about to start cooking dinner, so you have some time. After you eat, we'll expect you to sleep for at least six hours, if not more. Got it?"
"That's not exactly short…" Alette began, but upon seeing the look of determination on Beastboy's face, she decided to stop. She silently slipped past the green changeling into the bathroom, giving him and Cyborg a grateful smile as the door closed.
Half an hour later, water droplets from her wet hair still seeping under her t-shirt, Alette made her way into the main room. As she got closer, the smell of food made her stomach rumble with ferocity. Alette had not been aware of how hungry she actually was until that moment. She reached the counter behind which Cyborg was busy stacking waffle on top of waffle. "Hi," she greeted him as she sat down, eagerly anticipating dinner.
"Hey," he said gently, placing a plate of waffles in front of Alette. He journeyed to the other side of the counter and joined Alette, sitting in the chair next to her. "Feeling better?"
"Yeah," Alette admitted. She reached for her fork and began stuffing pieces of waffle into her mouth as Cyborg watched in amusement. "I thought you might be hungry," he said.
Alette blushed, putting the fork down. "I guess I haven't been paying much attention to my stomach lately. I really haven't been paying much attention to anything… except…" Alette released a frustrated sigh. "I just want her back, Cyborg."
"We all want her back, Alette," Cyborg said, watching as Alette took another bite of her waffles.
Alette nodded in understanding as she looked around the room. "Where is everyone?" she asked pleasantly in an attempt to not talk about her mother for a few minutes.
Cyborg finished chewing before he answered. "Nightwing and BB are out stopping a robbery and Starfire's with Tamara in the infirmary…" Alette detected a hint of bitterness in Cyborg's voice.
"Tamara is still in there? I thought for sure she was only stunned. What's wrong with her?" Cyborg shook his head. He sat his fork down and looked at the opposite wall, avoiding Alette's face. Alette detected his unease and the terrible thought that Tamara was, after everything, dying, ran through her mind. "Cyborg?" she prodded.
"Tamara's fine," he insisted. "But Starfire…" he trailed off.
"Something's wrong with Starfire?" Alette pressed.
"No. Well, not physically at least. Look, Alette," Cyborg began to explain, "Starfire has always been in love with Nightwing. Actually, I think it's just been a terribly long infatuation period. And though she's normally one of the gentlest people I know, jealousy is one of her greatest flaws. Finding out about you and seeing Nightwing's reaction to Raven coming back has just been a little too much for her. Nightwing has been really preoccupied with Raven since… well, since she left… and he's been pacing outside her room for the past three days worried sick about you. It just seems to me that Starfire wants Tamara to be hurt or something so Nightwing's attention will be on the family he has with her, and not the family he has with Raven." Cyborg paused to look over at Alette, who was looking disbelieving at Cyborg. "Do you understand?"
"I guess so," Alette said. She got up and walked with her empty plate to the sink, running it under hot water before placing it in the dishwasher. "How is he… Nightwing, I mean… how is he doing? I've… I can feel him when he's outside of the room, and he always seems to be…"
"A mess," Cyborg finished for her.
Alette nodded. "He's feeling so much and he's so conflicted…"
Cyborg joined Alette at the sink, adding his plate to the dishwasher. He placed his hands on Alette's shoulders, looking her in the eyes. "Why don't you talk to him when he gets back? The guy might be my best friend, but he's harder to read than anyone I've ever met… except maybe Raven."
Alette shook her head. "I don't think I can."
"Alette, he's your father."
"I don't even know him."
"That's easily fixed." Cyborg smiled, releasing Alette. "I'm not telling you what to do, but I think you'll both benefit from it. You don't have to be alone."
"I'll think about it," Alette said, not entirely sure if she meant it.
"That's all I'm asking. So," Cyborg said straightening up and moving towards the large TV screen. "Bee's out getting a movie. You want to watch it with us?"
"I don't think so," Alette said, following behind him. "I think I'll go get some sleep, then I've got to go back to the books."
Cyborg's smile faltered. "I wish there was something I could do. I shouldn't be watching a movie, but Bee said I need to stop thinking about it and…"
"Cyborg," Alette said, quieting Cyborg's rambling. She smiled at him as she placed a comforting palm on his mechanical shoulder, imitating a gesture he often made towards her. "It's alright. There's nothing you can do. Watch your movie, and enjoy being with Bumblebee."
She turned to leave the room, stopping at the entryway to turn back around and say, "And I promise, I'll try to take more breaks."
As she made her way down the dark hallway, Alette paused in front of the double doors with the word INFIRMARY etched into the metal. Tamara was, in fact, Alette's half sister, and something inside of her felt a twinge of concern for the little girl. Maybe I should check on her, Alette found herself thinking. She pushed open the doors, letting them swing to a halt before she walked any further into the sterile environment. A single lamp was on, and as Alette walked closer she saw the illuminated face of the sleeping eight-year-old. Her chest rose and fell in even intervals and from what Alette could read of her emotions, Tamara seemed to be fine.
Grateful that Starfire was no where to be seen, Alette sat in the chair next to Tamara's bed and watched as she continued to sleep. "I'm glad you're okay, Tamara," she whispered, brushing red hair away from the child's closed eyes. She stood to leave, and quietly slipped through the doors, releasing a breath she didn't realize she had been holding. She prepared to finish her trek back to Raven's room, but stopped as she realized she was face to face with Tamara's mother.
"What were you doing?" Starfire asked, glaring at Alette accusingly.
"I was just… I wanted to check on Tamara." Alette began to inwardly scold herself for getting into this situation. She did not want to get into a fight with her father's wife.
"Tamara wouldn't need checking up on if you and your mother had not put her in such danger."
Alette felt her anger flare, and the light bulb hanging over their heads shattered, the glass sprinkling over the carpet. "My mom might die because she saved your daughter."
"She only saved my daughter to impress my husband," Starfire hissed, her green eyes no more than slits as she glared at Alette.
"She did it because she knew Tamara was innocent," Alette said. Feeling bold she added, "And she doesn't need to do anything to impress Nightwing, he's just naturally attracted to her."
"Brat," Starfire spat. Her fists glowed with green power.
Somewhere in the rational part of Alette's brain a voice was telling her to quit while she was ahead, but Alette was too tired to be polite. She smirked instead. "Oops, did I touch a nerve?"
"You are no child of Nightwing's," Starfire said, her eyes beginning to glow. "He is good and kind and works to protect people while you, like your mother, are a creature of darkness cursed to bring nothing but destruction and chaos wherever you go."
Alette gritted her teeth and allowed her hands to be encased by black energy. "Aren't you supposed to be the adult here? Why is it I have to be the one to give the lecture? My mother was your friend, and you tossed her aside because you can't stand the fact that once, in a different time, she loved your husband and he loved her back." Alette shook her head in disappointment.
"You speak of things you do not understand."
"I speak what I know, and that is this… My mom did not come here with the intention of taking Nightwing away from you. In fact, she didn't even want me to know he was my father… she didn't want me to get attached to a man who could not commit to me."
"Nightwing does not want you or your mother."
"Yes, you've made sure to keep him occupied, haven't you? Telling him that something's wrong with Tamara when she's fine. Why don't you let that poor child out into the sunlight instead of making her think that she's going to die? Some mother you are…" Alette released a hiss of pain as a green fist made contact with her cheek. She took a couple steps backward, already feeling her healing powers working on her bruised and bloody jaw.
"Do not tell me how to be a good mother to my child," Starfire said threateningly.
"What would you have done, huh Starfire?" Alette said, her fists producing black electric sparks. "Would you have risked everything for me?"
Starfire was caught off guard by the question and she paused to reflect. A few moments of silence passed between the two, and still Starfire did not answer.
"I didn't think so," Alette said, turning to walk away. "You're not half the mother Raven is."
Starfire's angry cry was enough to alert Alette to her attack. Before Starfire could land a punch, Alette successfully created a black shield, protecting herself from the alien's energy blasts. She was considering what her next move might be, when a voice caught them both by surprise.
"Starfire! Alette! What the hell is going on?"
Nightwing stood at the end of the hallway, mouth open is shock. He was looking quizzically from the alien to the demon-child, not sure who to approach for a story.
Alette broke her shield. Looking from Starfire to Nightwing she mumbled, "Forget it," before running out of sight.
"Starfire, what happened?" Nightwing asked, moving closer to his wife.
Starfire did not speak. Instead, she allowed tears of hate, both of Alette and of herself, to flow down her face. She clung to Nightwing as she cried, and he held her close, all the while looking down the dark hallway into which Alette had disappeared.
Fuming after her fight with Starfire, Alette found sleep unattainable. After pacing in Raven's room for fifteen minutes, she decided a walk around the Tower might do her some good. Purposely moving in the opposite direction of the infirmary, Alette headed towards a wing of the building she'd never been in before. After about five minutes of wandering, she stumbled upon a large oak door that stood out painfully from the cold metal walls on either side of it. Feeling drawn in by the door's welcoming, familiar look, Alette stepped inside.
Lights flickered on as she opened the door and she saw that what she had come across was a large room with walls of shelves filled with books. Titans' Tower had its own custom library. The ceiling was two stories high, and Alette admired the oak wood details of the stairs and the paneling. A large brick fireplace served as the focal point of the room, though it was full of black ash and looked as if it had remained unused for a very long time. Feeling more at home than she had at any time in the past week, Alette set to work scanning the titles of the books, searching for anything she thought might help her with her search for a way to save Raven.
As she explored, Alette sang to fill the silence, something she did only when she was alone and no one could hear her. "Light and fragile and feathered sky blue… Thin and graceful… The sun shining through… she flies so high up in the sky… way out of reach of human eyes…" Alette paused as she continued singing in her rough, yet comforting way. The next words were so foreboding. How was it that she had picked, out of all of the thousands of songs she knew, this particular one? She continued, though her voice was raspier as it choked out the words. "And the only time she touches the ground is when that little bird, little bird… is when that little bird… Oh!"
Alette dropped the book in her hand as she jumped in surprise. Nightwing was standing just inside the doorway, leaning against the frame. He had a content, thoughtful smile on his face. "I… I didn't hear you come in," Alette said quickly, stooping to pick up the dropped book.
"That was the point," Nightwing said cryptically. "Although, I wasn't expecting to find you here."
"I'm sorry," Alette said, feeling more awkward by the minute. "I'll just go then."
Nightwing shook his head. "No, you don't have to. I'm glad this place is being of some use. I don't think anyone's been in here since…" Nightwing's voice trailed off and Alette had a pretty good idea of when the last time someone had been in the room was. "What were you singing?" he asked in interest, changing the subject.
"Nothing, really," Alette said, turning towards the bookshelf and pretending to continue her book hunt. "It's just a lullaby my mom used to sing to me when I was little. I really don't know why I was even singing it…" Alette's voice trailed off into the silence. She felt, rather than saw Nightwing move across the room to sit down at a table by the single large window.
"Do you know how to play chess?" he asked casually.
Only as she turned around to respond did she realize that the table Nightwing had sat down at was actually a chess board, supported by an ornate stand that was, like most other things in the library, oak. "I'm alright," she said, shrugging. He gestured to the seat opposite him, inviting her to sit down.
"Let's play."
Alette bit her lip nervously, but something felt right about this moment. Nightwing was, whether they liked it or not, part of her life, and sooner or later they were going to need to know more about each other than names. She set the book in her hand aside and joined Nightwing at the chess board. Looking down at her pieces, she had to laugh at the irony; they were black.
Noting the serious look on Nightwing's face, Alette quieted. She suddenly remembered the awful fight she'd had with Starfire and felt ashamed under his piercing stare. "I'm sorry about earlier," she began as Nightwing made his opening move. "I provoked Starfire, and I shouldn't have. I'm just… tired."
"No, you shouldn't blame yourself. Everyone's really tense these days. We're all worried about Raven," Nightwing said as he watched Alette ponder her first move.
As she slid a pawn forward Alette mumbled, "Everyone?" under her breath, her voice laced with sarcasm.
"Yes, everyone." Nightwing had heard her. "Starfire's worried about Raven too."
Alette bit down on her tongue so as not to let a horrible comment slip past her lips and ruin this moment with her father. In her silence, Nightwing continued to speak.
"It's funny that you would feel compelled to be here, in this room."
"Why is that?" Alette asked, raising an eyebrow.
"This was our place," Nightwing explained. "Mine and Raven's. She requested it when we were first making plans for the Tower. I grew attached to it too. Beastboy and Starfire have never shown a great affinity for books," Nightwing chuckled as he said this, "and Cyborg has always gotten his information from the internet. We both loved books, it was one of the many things we had in common." Nightwing looked across the board at Alette, seeing the hurt that spread over her face at the mention of her mother in such an intimate way. "Alette, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you were growing up."
Alette shook her head sadly as she placed her rook strategically behind one of her pawns. "Fate is a bitch," she said candidly. "I understand why Mom left and I know that it's no fault of yours that she didn't tell you anything. I turned out okay, for the most part at least…"
Comfortable silence again passed between the pair as Nightwing took one of Alette's pawns and she quickly returned the gesture. Alette had only every played the game with Bruce, who had used it as a method of teaching her strategy and as she watched Nightwing's plan unfold, she noticed the similarities. By now she had figured out Nightwing's connection to Bruce Wayne and the Batman, and she felt closer to her father because they had both learned from the same teacher.
"I'm not sure I can do this… save my mother, I mean," Alette confessed suddenly.
Nightwing's concentration temporarily left the board and he looked at Alette seriously. "I wish the burden didn't fall to you. Is there anything I can do to help?"
Alette thought for a second, remembering for the first time the vague details of the dream she'd had earlier. "I think I saw her earlier, in a vision. She was writing in something… do you know if she kept a journal or a diary… a notebook of any kind?"
A hint of blush colored Nightwing's face. He stood and moved to the large desk in the opposite corner of the room. From a drawer he pulled a beaten, aging leather-bound journal. "I took it from her room about two months after she left," he explained as he walked back. He sat down again, handing the book across the table to Alette. "But not to read it," he added quickly. "Just to make sure Beastboy didn't get his hands on it." Alette laughed appreciatively, running her fingers over the worn cover.
"We don't have to finish the game," Nightwing said, noticing Alette's interest in Raven's journal. "I know whatever's in there must be important, if she told you to look at it."
Alette shook her head. "No, let's finish. Somehow, I think she might understand me putting my research off for a few more minutes." She moved her knight to take Nightwing's bishop.
Nightwing smiled, once again turning his concentration to the black-and-white checkered board. "You're a lot like Raven, you know that?"
"I don't think I had much of a choice. But it's funny…" Alette's voice trailed off.
"What's funny?"
"She always used to tell me how much I reminded her of my father." When Nightwing said nothing, choosing instead to move his queen, Alette continued. "Sometimes, when she thought I was sleeping, I could hear her crying. I asked her a couple years ago why she cried… she told me it was because she had lost so much… But then she looked at me and hugged me tight… and she told me that I was worth it."
"She was still a child and… I wish she had stayed with me," Nightwing admitted.
"No, you know better than to say that. My mom was never a child," Alette corrected as she took one of Nightwing's pawns. "Come to think of it, neither was I. But we really didn't have a choice. My first words were Azarath Metrion Zinthos," she laughed, though Nightwing detected the sorrow in her voice.
"Did you… how should I say this…" Nightwing stumbled, "Did you have a normal life?"
"Pretty much. I mean I had a billionaire godfather who doted on me like I was a princess, and a mother who kept my feet firmly on the ground and taught me everything I know about being part-demon, not to mention Alfred, who's only wish was to see that I ate three meals a day and had some time to be outside and be a kid for a few hours. I went to school in Gotham, but I really didn't have many friends. It never bothered me much…" Alette trailed off. She was venturing into territory that was still fresh from new wounds. But something inside her and in the look Nightwing's eyes cast on her from behind his mask encouraged her to keep going. "I met this one kid in sixth grade, though. I accidentally used my powers to save him from this out of control car. His mom had died a couple years before, and we complemented each other really well. We were pretty much inseparable through middle and high school and I thought…" Alette felt heat rise to her face. "I thought at the end there I might have been falling in love with him."
Nightwing waited and listened patiently, all the while keeping up the chess game. He moved his queen into position in the silence. "Check," he proclaimed.
As she moved her king out of harm's way, Alette continued. "But then one night, a couple days after graduation, James and his father showed up at our shop… dressed in awful red cloaks…" Alette could not stop the tears from falling down her face, but she continued her story. "Apparently James's father had always had a fascination with dark magic… and he had found out about my mom and me from watching us for all those years. He told us he had been contacted by the great lord Trigon and that it was his mission to bring us to his master. I couldn't believe it… I pleaded with James… He looked at me with an awful glare, one I'd never seen on his face before… and he told me in a dead voice that his name was not James… he had been given the name Keahi by his master…"
"Keahi?" Nightwing asked, recognizing the name.
Alette nodded. "Check," she declared before continuing the story. "The one that took Tamara and then took my mother… The one who…" Alette's gaze traveled to her palm where pink scars etched out a symbol that brought back the horrible memory of the night in the alley a week before. "James's father had been one of the youngest members of the cult that originally attracted my grandmother, and he started it up again. My mom thought college would get them off of my back, and trust me, I didn't leave her willingly. But then the night before classes I spotted James's dad following me." She paused, looking at Nightwing, a small smile on her face. "And that's where you come in, I believe."
Realization dawned on Nightwing as he remembered the night when he had first seen Alette, thinking that she was Raven. "That man, then, he was Keahi's father."
"Yes," Alette affirmed as she moved her king out of another check. "And I killed him that night."
"You were protecting yourself, Alette," Nightwing said in a comforting voice.
"Now Keahi has my mother… and all I can think about is…"
"Alette, we will save Raven."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because… there's still so much I need to tell her…" Nightwing's voice trailed off and for the first time Alette noticed the damp patches around his mask. Forgetting the chess board and the fact that her king was in dire need of saving, Alette moved to Nightwing and bent over and for the first time in her life she hugged her father. She squeezed him tightly, holding on to him as she cried into his black hair.
Nightwing, though initially shocked, allowed his arms to circle around his daughter, rocking her gently as she sobbed. "I know, Alette, I know…" he whispered comfortingly. He kissed the top of her head and after a while, pulled her away so he could see her face. "Let's finish the game," he suggested.
Alette nodded in agreement, returning to her chair. They did not talk anymore, feeling that the air around them was thoroughly saturated with emotion. Every move was calculated, just as they had been taught.
"Checkmate," Nightwing announced as he toppled Alette's defeated king.
"I'm not surprised," Alette admitted. "I never could beat Bruce." She watched as Nightwing began to set the pieces in their rightful spots, readying them for the next game, whenever it might come. "Nightwing?"
"Yes?" he continued to arrange the pieces, but let Alette know he was listening with a quick glance.
"I'm sorry I unloaded all that stuff on you… I wasn't really planning on it. I'm just tired and it's all just gotten a little overwhelming…"
"I'm glad you trusted me enough to tell me," Nightwing said as he finished setting the board. "I think we'll both be able to sleep tonight," he added as he stood up. "And I think that sounds like a good idea."
"Yeah," Alette agreed.
Nightwing escorted Alette back to Raven's room, giving her a final hug accompanied by an "Everything will be fine." Satisfied that Alette was safe for the night, he traveled to the infirmary to check on Tamara one last time before he went to bed. He was surprised to find Tamara's bed empty when he got there. Worry rising in his chest, he made his way to Starfire's room on the opposite side of the Tower. Catching his breath, he punched in the entry code and waited impatiently for the door to slide open.
"Starfire, where…" His voice hushed quickly. Lying in the bed was Starfire, her hair cascading over the pillow. Her arms encircled their small child, who was sleeping peacefully in her mother's arms. Grateful that Starfire had finally decided to let Tamara out of the infirmary, Nightwing watched them sleep for a few minutes, wondering vaguely if Raven had ever held Alette safely in her arms and almost sure that she had.
He moved to the door, whispering a good-night as it slid closed behind him. Nightwing trekked back across the Tower, past Raven's room and to his own. After changing out of his uniform and into his pajamas, he slipped under the covers and into a deep sleep where visions of Raven safe in his arms comforted him.
For her part, Alette lay in bed awake, clutching her mother's journal to her chest. She did not share Nightwing's optimism, though she supposed it was for her benefit that he had taken that attitude in the first place. She wanted to read over every page in the book until she found what Raven wanted her to find, but her body protested. Resigning to the fact that she would be much more productive if she got some sleep, Alette rolled over to her side and fell asleep with the journal held protectively in her arms. As she slipped into the welcomed slumber, she breathed out the final, ominous words of her mother's lullaby.
"And the only time she touches the ground is when that little bird… dies."
A/N: Are you all okay? I know I crammed a lot into this chapter, and I hope you're not all overwhelmed and I hope it didn't seemed too forced. I had fun getting into Alette's head a little more and she and Nightwing finally got to talk! A few notes:
I would like to again say that I don't even know what's going on in this story until I sit down to write the next chapter. Just remember that sometimes you have to go through the darkest forest to reach the most beautiful castle (Please forgive that awful thing I just wrote… You can take the girl out of Disney, but you can't take the Disney out of the girl!)
I loved that library… When I came up with the idea, I kept picturing the library from Beauty and the Beast (Oy, again with the Disney!)… Of course, I scaled it down… a lot…
The song Alette is singing is an actual lullaby called "Little Bird." I heard it on one of my Jewel CDs (don't make fun!) and it just screamed RAVEN to me… Let me know if you're interested in the lyrics for the whole song. I'd be happy to e-mail them!
To Down the rabbit hole1: It's so nice to hear from a fellow prisoner in the jail that is IB. Sometimes you start to wonder if the program really is an international thing, or if it's just one big hoax… Alette (I'm so excited you asked!) means "wing," which I found appropriate for the child of two birds… My English texts? Over the two years I've had HL English, I've read Things Fall Apart, Heart of Darkness, Streetcar Named Desire, Sula, Anna Karenina, Crime and Punishment, Madame Bovary, The Scarlet Letter, The Bell Jar, Hamlet, poems by Keats, House of the Spirits, Their Eyes Were Watching God, The Awakening, and Ceremony… the last of which I need to finish by Monday… What were yours?... Thanks so much!
I was so touched to hear that some of you actually cried or felt like crying after the last chapter. Raven-Fieryblack and Chica De Los Ojos Café, you guys don't know how much it means to hear that something I wrote made someone feel so much!
To everyone else who reviewed, I feel the need to repeat my gratitude… You guys keep me going!
On a much less upbeat note, in exactly nine days I will embark on the journey only people completely out of their minds are willing to take… I will begin the long haul through two weeks of solid AP and IB testing (for those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about… congratulations! You're wiser people than me…) What that means, essentially, is that I will be eating, sleeping, and breathing testing materials for that period of time and will temporarily drop off of the fanfiction radar. I will, however, try my best to get another chapter up before all hell breaks loose, but unfortunately I can't make any promises. The upside to all of this is that after testing I'm basically a free girl waiting patiently for graduation and I should have a lot more time to write.
So that's it for now… geeze, I even wrote a longer author's note than usual! I guess two weeks is really too long to go without updating… Well, let me know what you think! You know how I love my reviewers (I bet everyone is getting tired of hearing this…)! Hopefully, I'll be in touch sooner rather than later!
Ashlyn
