Thanks for the reviews. Here's part 2.
And for those of you who are curious, Ryan is around. And he's coming. And most likely he'll bring Summer with him.
Not literally, but don't think that Seth is getting away with this stuff.
Note: I have written and re written this chapter about two or three times. I think this one is the best, though.
Seth's eyes opened at the incessant pounding coming from the inside of his head. Looking down at his outfit, he realized he was still dressed in his jeans, t-shirt, sweatshirt and sneakers from the night before. A wave of nausea washed over him and he closed his eyes again. His mind reeled as he tried to remember the events from the night before. Foggy images of Michael's apartment made themselves clear and last night came roaring back into his mind like a train. There had been lots of weed, lots of ecstasy, lots of alcohol and lots of girls. One girl in particular whose name stuck out in his mind.
Cassie. That was her name. She was a cute little freshman of Asian decent, and to put it nicely, she was well known for being "friendly" to a lot of different boys. He remembered taking the ecstasy just as she walked in with a group of her friends. She had immediately taken a liking to Seth, and the rest had been history.
Oh, last night was definitely something to remember. For good or for bad, Seth couldn't tell. Blinking lights kept flashing through his head as he tried to piece memories and events together. He vaguely remembered laying down in only his boxers and a wool coat on Michael's shag rug in the middle of the living room and the tingles and sensations it sent up and down his body. He could barely see Cassie laying half naked next to him, slowly peeling off his coat and running her fingers under the elastic waistline of his shorts. He made a choked, groaning noise of sorts as he remembered having sex with Cassie on Josiah's floor, only because Josiah was at his girlfriend's house. And only because they were too lazy to get up on the bed.
What he remembered most about rolling, though, was the impeccable feeling of ecstasy he achieved while peeking on the drug.
His body had felt like his nerves were on end, yet dancing at the same time. He loved everyone and everything, and it was as if the past nineteen years of his life hadn't happened. It was as if he had been raised in a bubble of pure love that had never had intrusions. Even while he was rolling, he knew that he had never felt so good and that he would probably never, ever feel that good while sober.
The bad part was that he knew that no one should ever feel that good.
His mind shot back to the night before, and he saw himself writhing in sheer enjoyment on the carpet, his arms rubbing the rug and the girls smearing lotion all over his naked torso. The lights blinked and told stories, causing pictures to form in his head. He had never felt so incredible. He had never felt so creative. He had never felt so right.
He had never felt so alive.
Thanks to an illegal, dangerous drug.
But this morning was a completely different story. Josiah and Derek had told him that coming down off of the ecstasy was the worst feeling imaginable. Seth hadn't understood the severity of the words until he himself came down on the walk home to his dorm.
It was, quite literally, as if he had been dancing and playing and screaming and singing at the top of his lungs while in the clouds, and someone had been angered and yanked him to the ground by his feet. He went from unimaginable bliss to normalcy in just seconds. If he thought about it too much, it was enough to make him scream in agony. He sighed and took a deep breath. It was only once. It wasn't an everyday occurrence. It was just one of those things; a college experiment.
He rolled over to look at the digital clock that read 11:10. The only thing that Seth needed to know at this point was whether it was day or night. Judging by the light coming from the curtains, he assumed it was morning.
Tossing his fully dressed legs over the side of the bed, he slouched his way into the bathroom. His movements were awkward and slow, and for some reason he felt as if he were sore. He flicked the on the light in the bathroom and leaned forward to examine himself.
Plain and simple, he looked like hell. His hair was sweaty, matted and pressed tightly to his head like a helmet. His skin was pale and clammy, and some of his hair stuck to his face. His eyes were glassy and his pupils were still larger than normal, though nothing compared to their monstrous size the night before. The dark circles under his eyes looked almost like bruises.
He let out another groan as his mind continued to recollect the night before. That was it. No more drugs. He couldn't believe that he actually let himself go just that one time. He was no better than those Newport party kids that he despised so much in high school. He could tell that his mind was still foggy from the night before and that his movements were slow and not well planned. What kind of weak minded idiot could be pressured into taking illegal drugs? What a moronic move.
If Ryan ever found out about this, Seth's life would be over. Fortunately for the situation, though, Ryan was either at Marissa's dorm or at the frat house that he frequented. Ryan had sworn that he wouldn't pledge, but he had already made friends with half of the guys from Phi Delta. It was obvious to anyone that it was only a matter of time before Ryan joined and became a Phi himself. And since that left Seth alone for long amounts of time, it only made sense that he should get into some unsupervised mischief.
Right?
'Stop trying to justify this,' Seth's conscious snapped. 'There is nothing you can say that makes this okay. This isn't your parents' fault and this isn't Ryan's fault. Mom and Dad have warned you countless times what ecstasy does to your brain.'
He turned on the shower and continued to study his appearance. Maybe hanging out with those guys wasn't the best decision he could make. Because as much fun as it was having friends, doing drugs was not the way he wanted to do that.
Before he had a chance to think about it anymore, his phone began to vibrate in his pocket. He pulled it out and sighed as he saw Michael's name flash across the caller ID. He considered ignoring the call for a moment before he flipped the phone open and held it to his ear.
"Hello?" He rubbed his hand across his face as he realized how rough even his voice sounded.
"Seth, buddy, how you feeling this morning?"
"Not great, actually. How are you guys doing?"
"I'm fine. I know how to make the come down a lot better than it is. And the guys are still passed out."
Seth paused for a second. "Michael, buddy, I'm going to be honest with you. Last night was not fun. At all."
"Dude, are you kidding? You were the one talking about how that was the best night you have ever had. And believe me, you were having plenty of fun with Cassie."
"That's just it, man. I don't want to be a man whore and drug addict. I think I'm going to have to bow out of this one."
"Seth, dude, we have all been in your place. I know that its scary the first time you do it, but its like anything else. You just have to try again and it gets easier and easier and more fun and more fun."
"No, Michael," Seth stated with finality. "Doing drugs is not like anything else."
"Calm down, calm down," Michael sighed. "I really like you, Seth. I think you're one of the most real people on this campus. So how about this? Come hang out with us tonight."
"I don't think that's such a good idea…"
"Just hear me out. No drugs. Just you, me, Pat, Josiah and Brian, all sitting around playing cards. Or we could order a pizza. Sound okay?"
Seth paused for a second. "No drugs?"
"None."
"Okay. I can stop by this afternoon after my chemistry class at 8."
"Sounds good, dude. See you then."
"Later," Seth sighed, hanging up the phone. Part of him congratulated himself on standing up for his morals and beliefs while the other half kicked himself for not ditching these guys all together. Was it really that hard to find friends that weren't addicted to drugs? After all, Ryan had done it.
Ryan. Shit. Seth was supposed to meet him at 11:00 in the student union. Seth tossed a gaze to the clock that read 11:20. Not too late to make it, but definitely late. He grabbed his backpack off of the table before taking off out of the door.
"I'm kind of worried about Seth," Ryan sighed to his girlfriend as they walked hand in hand along the campus a couple of days later. "He hasn't been himself without Summer."
"It's a breakup, Ryan," Marissa said softly. "Neither one of them are taking it lightly. But it's okay. They'll get better."
"I hope so," Ryan shook his head. "I saw him a couple of days ago when we met to exchange psych notes. He looked horrible. He was all pale and he had circles under his eyes."
Marissa seemed totally unconcerned. "I'm sure he's fine. He's probably just really stressed about his classes. Or maybe he is losing sleep over Summer. Either way, you just have to back off and let him handle this."
"I guess you're right," Ryan shrugged. He just wasn't used to letting people handle their own problems. He was usually the one handling their problems.
"Ryan, you can go around saving people forever," Marissa said sheepishly, trying to avoid Ryan's skeptical look. "Okay, maybe I am not the right one to say that, but I am trying too. No more fights, no more drama. I promise."
Ryan smiled slightly as he leaned in for a kiss. "Promise?"
"Promise," she grinned wildly, snaking her arms around his neck.
He pulled back as he felt the vibrating against his side. "Your phone?"
Marissa grinned sheepishly once more as she pulled it out to see who was invading their moment. "It's Summer." She opened the phone and gave Ryan the 'one second' finger. "Hello?"
"Coop?" It was obvious that Summer had been crying.
"Sum, what's wrong?"
"Marissa," Summer sobbed, "I miss Seth. And I hate Brown!"
"You don't hate Brown, Summer. You were just talking about how much you loved it!"
"I lied! I miss Cohen!"
Marissa rolled her eyes in Ryan's direction, indicating that the call was going to take a little longer than expected. He nodded understandingly and walked towards a coffee cart to kill some time. Just as he was about to decide between a banana muffin or a bagel, he saw Seth walking across the courtyard with a guy Ryan had never seen before. He jogged out to meet them.
"Seth!" Ryan called. Seth paused for a moment, his face registering no emotion. "What's up man?"
"Not a lot, actually," Seth said softly, returning the half hug. "This is Derek."
Ryan shook his head and nodded. "Ryan."
Derek returned the nod and then glanced at Seth expectantly. Seth took the hint. "We were actually just running to a friend's house. Derek has to get some stuff from an ex. You know how that goes."
Ryan gave Derek a sympathetic look and Derek shrugged. "Well, it's been real guys, but my girlfriend is ready to go. See ya," Ryan called, jogging back the way he came.
As soon as Ryan was out of ear shot, Seth turned on Derek. "What the fuck, man?"
"Dude, you're paranoid. No one on this campus is looking at us at all. We're two normal guys."
"Two normal guys with ounces of illegal substances in our pockets!" Seth hissed. "Do you realize how much trouble we could get in?"
"Really, Seth? I was totally unaware of the fact that Ritalin, the drug I'm prescribed to take, is illegal," Derek snipped sarcastically.
"We are not using it for your ADD, and you know it," Seth snarled. "If it's so okay, just go offer some to that cop over there."
"Just calm down. For all anyone knows, we are two guys on a mission to get one's shit back from an ex!"
Seth shook his head, his anger relenting a bit. "I just don't like this."
"Do you want to smoke tonight or not?"
Seth sighed and rubbed his temples. He had become accustomed to smoking over the past few days. And while he wasn't addicted to it, the idea of a little buzz and giggle fest with the guys who were becoming his best friends didn't sound like such a bad idea. Especially on a Friday night.
"I want to smoke," Seth practically whispered. Derek grinned widely and slung an arm around the taller man's shoulders.
"Sweet. You won't be sorry, man. We just have to get to this guy's house and get some weed."
"Alright," Seth sighed. "But I'm not rolling again, because--"
"Stop," Derek said with finality, taking a step back to look at Seth. "There is no need to tell me why. You didn't like it, and that's totally fine. I'm not going to badger you until you give me a reason I see fit."
Seth blinked.
"And I'm certainly not going to make you roll again. You didn't like it. I understand."
"Thanks, dude," Seth grinned, patting Derek on the back. Derek tossed his arm lazily around Seth's middle back.
"Man, I think we're having a moment," Derek laughed joyously as he dropped his arm back down and punched Seth playfully in the shoulder. "But Seth, if you tell me you didn't like the weed, man, I'm going to know you're lying."
Seth gave Derek a sideways glance as they continued to walk, a sneaky smile edging at the corners of his mouth.
Later that night, Seth sat on Michael's couch, and he was more stoned than he had ever been in his entire life. Things were going really fast around him and any ounce of thought or effort was going solely into the record playing on the player in the living room. He let out an uneasy sigh as Cassie snuggled closer under his arm.
"I'm so fucked up," Cassie grumbled, throwing her arm out for her pack of cigarettes.
Normally, Seth would never have even given a girl who smoked a second thought. Normally, Seth would never have given a girl who wasn't Summer a second thought. But Cassie was nice.
And he was way too stoned to make her move.
He looked down as she started to run her free hand along the zipper of his jeans. He stared at her for a moment before willing his hand to try to push hers away. She snaked back around his arm to keep touching him, and he put his hands down in defeat.
"Dude, Cassie, seriously?" Pat asked as he set the bong back onto the table. "Can you not see that he doesn't want any right now? Are you that fucking stupid?"
"Go to hell, Pat! You're just jealous that I'm not laying on you right now."
"Oh yeah, I'm jealous. Jealous of all the STD's and bastard kids I'm not getting! I'm keeping you as far away as possible, slut!"
Brian, who was sitting right next to Pat, raised a hand. "But we're not saying that she's bad for you, Seth. We just don't agree with her actions."
"Are you so slutty that you have to touch a guy who obviously doesn't even like you?"
The bickering continued, but Seth was still too messed up to do anything about it. He sat and stared off into space for a minute or so until the door opened and Derek, Michael and Josiah walked in with victorious grins.
"We got the yay!" Josiah grinned widely. He took three tiny baggies out of his pocket and tossed them to Brian and Pat. Brian poured some onto the table and started cutting it into finer grains, and Pat slipped his into his cigarette box.
"You want a hit of this?" Michael asked Seth a few minutes later after he got done making lines on the kitchen counter. "I got a line for you, Cohen."
Seth shook his head.
"No man, don't you make him do that," Derek said very calmly from the living room. "Don't you fucking touch him."
"Don't mind Derek," Josiah whispered to Seth as he leaned over him to grab his cigarettes. "He's on methadone."
"Methadone?" Seth grumbled. "Isn't that like morphine?"
"Yeah," Michael nodded disapprovingly, kicking Derek softly as he walked by him. "It's just like morphine."
Seth shook his head. "Holy hell."
"Want to blow?" Michael grinned as grabbed his wallet off of a side table and walked back into the kitchen. Seth roughly untangled himself from Cassie and went to investigate the cocaine. Michael had cut seven lines on the counter.
"Oh, dude," Pat laughed out loud as Michael took a $100 bill out of his wallet. He rolled it tightly and snorted the white powder into his nose. He sniffed loudly, his eyes watering and his sinuses swelling under the pressure. Michael sat back, obviously stunned for a few seconds before he broke out into a huge grin.
"This is good, dude."
Pat took the bill from his friend's hand and followed suit with the snorting. He had the same reaction as Michael, with the same goofy grin. As soon as he was done, he handed the bill to Seth. Seth stared at it for a moment, his mind still hazy and cloudy from the pot.
"Just snort it," Brian mumbled, cutting another line on the counter. "It's fun."
"Haven't you already done one?" Seth asked, his eyes open to barely slits.
"I've done two," Brian laughed. Seth really didn't find it funny, but he began to giggle as well. As soon as they were done laughing, Seth rolled the bill back tightly.
"Alright, I'll do it." Seth was still laughing as he ran the bill along the snow white powder, inhaling from his nose as he went.
The cocaine hit his sinuses like a stab to the brain. All of his senses heightened and stopped all at the same time and he thought he was going to die. Suddenly, he had an overwhelming sense of accomplishment and excitement as soon as the drug hit his brain. A smile started crossing his face as Cassie stumbled into the kitchen.
"Took a hit, huh?" she asked, lighting up another cigarette. "I'll never touch that stuff."
"It's not so bad," Seth grumbled, almost completely ignoring her as he pushed by her to the living room. "Just for the one time."
"That's the thing about cocaine," she exhaled dramatically as she watched him drum his legs while pacing the living room. "There's never just one line."
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Author's notes: This is so hard to write. I want to make it realistic, but its so dark. But don't worry. Seth may be having fun now, but the proverbial crap will soon hit the fan. Now that all of this is out of the way, some fun stuff and storyline can start happening.
