Author's Note: I was inspired to write this after reading Chapter 465 "Light" in the InuYasha manga( you can see it on read this and cried. I listened to the piece,"Don't Cry,Kagome" by Robert Parker (a piece done by the friend of the website's mistress that she put on her site) that was inspired by this chapter and Kaoru Wada's music. I cried, more. I'll try not to spoil it for you, but this is a one-shot reflection on Kagome's feelings on Kikyo's death.
Disclaimer: InuYasha and Co. belong to Rumiko Takahashi. This story is based upon an already existing piece of work. So, this is only partially mine.
Kagome couldn't believe it. Even as the soul collectors swarmed around them, with the remains of Kikyo's soul, she couldn't believe it.
'Kikyo's...she's r-really gone...?' she thought, as a new set of tears sprung to her grey-blue, to replace the old, fallen ones.
Kikyo was truly gone. After a truly horrible,unvictorious battle with Naraku, miasma had consumed Kikyo's fragile body and soul. She'd been extremely weakened, since her fight with Naraku had been prolonged. She couldn't purify the miasma that lay within her. After their feeble attempts, the monstrous half-demon fled.
And so...
Together they had walked to a grassy field outside of the battlefield. InuYasha had carried Kikyo in his arms, and walked ahead of them all. Sango,Miroku,Shippo, and Kilala had resided in the middle. Kagome was at the back, with Kouga, who had helped along side them.
Half-way on the hill, InuYasha had asked them to stay back. Kagome knew InuYasha was hurting, especially, since he was unable to protect Kikyo from Naraku, again.
Only a few moments had past, moments Kagome would never forget. She continuously cried, Kouga sitting beside her, knowing nothing he could say would help her.
'Why...?Why did that...b-bastard, Naraku had to be so damn persistent! Did he truly despise Kikyo, so much he'd put her through hell again! Why...why couldn't he just hid under a rock!' she said to herself as she began to gush out waterfalls from her blurry,misty grey-blue orbs.
'Why..?'
'Why...did it have to b-be this way...?'
She glanced ahead as she watched InuYasha embrace Kikyo, except this type she felt sad. Not sad, knowing InuYasha would always love Kikyo, but sad because Kikyo had suffered twice when she was alive.
Twice.
All this time, she was envious of Kikyo, it was her little sin. She wanted to be held by InuYasha. She wanted to feel his touch, his touch caressing her skin, making it tingle with passion.
And yet.
She had never once, truly spared a thought about Kikyo's feelings. She loved a man that she could never be with because she was the living dead. She was destined to a blissful suffering. A sweet love that could never be. She always had to be on her toes, she was after all, a powerful priestess. Then, the very minute she was allowed to be an ordinary woman, she was deceived by a malicious, half -demon and died, believing her beloved was a traitor. 50 years later, she's resurrected by an evil witch demon named Subaki. She is reborn, only to live off the souls' of others. She...tries to finish her life's work by purifying the jewel, and killing Naraku. Only, to be murdered by the bastard...again.
And she...couldn't do...she...couldn't do...ANYTHING! She couldn't do, anything..if...she'd been a better, stronger priestess likeKikyo...i-if...if..
"If only I'd been stronger..." she barely mumbled.
"If only I'd been faster..."
"If only..."
She continously, mumbled many,"If only" sentences, but never finished them.
That's when...
She heard InuYasha gasp. Quickly, she got up, only to feel like crupling back down. InuYasha stood back at bright, shining lights glowed and floated, where Kikyo had just been. Her assumption was right as she spotted the late miko's outfit on the ground.
'No...no...NO!' she screamed over and over, in her mind.
'No...'
She looked around. Miroku and Sango, also standing watched the heart ripping scence. Even, small Shippo stood, quietly. Kilala was whimpering, her tails and ears, leaning downward. Only, Kouga continued to seat down.
Turning back, she watched as the soul collectors silently,flew by them swarming around InuYasha. They each picked up an orb of light, the remains of the soul of Kikyo. Once all was gathered, the soul collectors swarmed around them. Glowing light danced around them all.
It was felt fuzzy and warm.
'Oh,so warm. Like a mother's touch...'
A mother.
Kikyo in a way had been just that. She remembered those times, those times Kikyo had been there for her. There was the that time in the miko-eating demon's belly. More recently, when she saved her from her fall in the battle. Kikyo, started out bitter towards her, and slowly, guided down the path of a priestess. She'd put more faith in her abilities, than she did. Even if, she was her reincarnation, Kikyo made it seem that shewas her star pupil, her unseen companion, yet she never really showed it until these last few days together.
'More and more, she had learned to trust and love, again.'
As she watched her soul dance around her.
She continued to cry.
She had just lost a piece of herself.
'A piece I'll never get back.'
She heard the others as Kikyo's soul continued to flicker and glow, brightly.
"This light," Miroku said.
"Kikyo's soul..." Sango whispered, mournfully.
"It's as if...she's saying farewell," mumbled the fox child, clinging to the monk's purple robed shoulder.
"It's warm..." Kagome said aloud, yet to herself, feeling a strong love within the white orbs.
Then, the soul collectors flew upward with Kikyo's soul. It was like a light, barely flickering through the darkness, yet continuously shining.
Just like Kikyo.
The odds had been against her, but she continued to perceive through them. And even now...
"Kikyo..is saying "Don't mourn.""
InuYasha said this as he looked upward where Kikyo's soul was disappearing into the dark.
All I could say was he name, in an whisper.
'He'd been through, so much. And, now this.'
My already tear-stained face, was still drowning in what seemed like,eternal tears.
Far off, InuYasha could swear he heard Kikyo say:
"I'll always...protect you."
Kagome's sorrow overflowed in her heart.
Overwhelming sorrow.
Just before the last of the miko's soul faded, she heard these words:
"Don't cry, Kagome. You saved me, more than you'll ever know."
Kagome's eyes widened at Kikyo's voice...
And then...
The soul's light vanished.
Author's Note: During the wrirting of this story I cried. I cried as I listened to the beautiful song, and I cried as I wrote these very words. You can find the link to the song, at the end of the chapter, where it says Translation and Reading Notes. I hope it affects you as much as me. Even if it doesn't that's okay.
Please, just read and review.
No flames.
Please understand my inspiration and do not flame me. For that means, you can't see other perspectives.
Especially, others.
Thanks, for understanding.
- luv,angel-muzik,baby
