Ezra found himself being held by Ursula in Ariel's Grotto. "Where's the mermaid?" he asked.

"Over at Tokyo Disney Sea. You're doomed, Ezra."

"What's your plan, anyway?" the ghost continued. "If I'm about to be raped by a sea witch, I'd really like some warning first!"

"You're such a silly ghost," sighed Ursula. "I plan to use your uncontrollable spirit to take over this park! Do you know how much cash that 'Ursula World' will make?"

Ezra suddenly realized something. "Wait...if you're using my spirit...and I AM a spirit...HOLY CRAP, THIS IS THE END! Uh...did I ever tell you how beautiful you are? The tentacles, the purple skin, it's total sex appeal!"

"Shut up." Ursula slapped Ezra.

"Ooh," the ghost grinned hopefully, "I'm really turned on now!"

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Phineas and Ariel nervously paced at the Cast Member's apartment. "We've got to think of something!" said Ariel. "This is just like the plot of The Little Mermaid, but I can't remember how they beat Ursula!"

"I can't either!" sighed Phineas. "It's sad when Disney characters forget their own plots."

Gus ran in.. "Straight from Blockbuster, it's the video!"

They turned on the TV. "American Dragon: Jake Long" was on. "I'm going ghost! ...uh, I mean, dragon up! Wow, I hope no one heard that."

They put the tape in and fast forwarded towards the final fight scene.

"Hey," said Phineas, "did you ever notice in a lot of 'parodies' of this story they, like us, don't have the main character as a mermaid, but they keep the nautical lyrics of 'Fathoms Below' the same?"

"Yeah, that's pretty uncreative," agreed Ariel.

"And," continued Phineas, "they also keep most the fish references the same in 'Under the Sea."

"Well," Ariel shrugged, "I guess not everyone can write a song parody."

"But you know what really burns me up?" grumbled Gus. "They make almost no changes to the original script!"

Ariel lowered her voice. "That's not the worst part...they get a ton of praising reviews!"

All three of them screamed as thunder randomly clapped. Ariel turned back to the TV. "Hey, here's the final fight scene!"

"I swear the minister has an erection," said Phineas.

"Shut up."

"Okay," said Ariel, "so they plunge a ship into her heart. Eww. Hey, didn't Maleficent die in almost the same way?"

"How do we kill her that way?" wondered Gus.

"I have an idea!" Ariel run out, towards the Magic Kingdom.

"Yeah, she's totally like Ezra," said Phineas.

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Ursula circled Ezra. "In a few minutes, I'll take your soul, meaning that I'm taking you period!"

"No more taunting! I don't respond well to taunting!"

Mr. Bluebird flew in. "Leave the ghost alone, you villain!"

"Flotsam! Jetsam!" ordered Ursula. "Take the bird out!" The two eels flopped around limply.

"I guess they don't work on land, huh?" said Ezra.

An army of Disney characters surrounded the grotto. Deciding the time was right, Ursula sucked Ezra's essence up, leaving a shriveled green thing in his place. "I have power! I tower over all of you fools! None of you can stop me! You're all...worthless!"

"This is my park!" defended Mickey.

"Oh, fearsome Kingdom Hearts boy is after me. Whatever can I do?" She zapped Mickey. "I WIN! I WIN!"

Ariel suddenly flew at her in a flying ship. "Wrong, Ursula! I've just come from Peter Pan's Flight! Prepare to meet faith, trust, and pixie dust!" Ariel plunged the ship's mast into Ursula, making the sea witch crumble and fall. Ezra was instantly restored.

"No!" shouted Ursula, dissolving into a puddle. "I'll be back! I'll be back..." Ursula disappeared.

"So long and thanks for all the fish!" cheered Ariel.

"Back or not, they're not gonna pay her this week," said Ezra.

Mickey rushed up to the couple. "Ariel, you've saved our park! For that, you deserve a promotion!"

"Well, a job at the Haunted Mansion would be nice..."

"Done!"

George Gracey stepped forward as well. "And as for you, Ezra, you obviously long to be human more than all of us. I'm sure we can find a replacement ghost."

"But the whole time I was human, I missed the mansion. I want to stay a ghost."

Madame Leota turned him into a human anyway.

"HEY!" yelled Ezra. "I SAID I WANTED TO STAY A GHOST!"

Leota sighed and turned Ezra into a ghost again. "Just when I thought I was rid of him..."

Ezra bounced around energetically. "Woo-hoo! I'm a ghost again! I'm incurably, uninterrably out of my head, I've been diagnosed! But it don't matter if you're mad as a hatter when you're lucky enough to be a..." He stopped singing and turned to Ariel. "I'm sorry, Ariel. I wish we could stay together."

"But I don't care if you're a ghost! I still love you!"

"Aww," said the crowd. Ezra and Ariel kissed.

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Randall snuck through the Mansion's halls. "I have infiltrated the Mansion. Now to throw all the books around, knock over the suit of armor, and other stuff!"

Suddenly, he was scorched by a some flying candles. Yelling in pain, the monster stumbled into the path of several Doombuggies, which ran him over. Phineas and Gus gave the splattered villain a final kick, sending him flying out of the mansion and once again landing in the lake.

Ezra and Ariel strolled through the graveyard, not caring if guests saw them. "Ah, the mansion!" said Ezra. "Ghosts, gargoyles, graves, optimistic music...wait, the only time we have optimistic music is when there's a reprise..."

Ariel and Ezra: Now we can walk, now we can run

Now we can finally just have some fun

Just you and me

Now I can be

Part of your world

Phineas, Gus, and Mr. Bluebird smiled from the Attic's window. Phineas turned to Gus. "Are you SURE the priest didn't have an erection?"


So ends the tale of Ezra. I'd like to thank everyone for reviewing and leaving real reviews. I've seen a lot of stories where people just write. "Oh no! I can't believe (Insert name of character playing King Triton) just did that!" or "(Insert name of character playing Ursula) just tricked (insert name of character playing Ariel)." They're nothing but plot recaps! The people sound like they've never even SEEN the movie!

...So thanks, everyone.