. Can You Hold Me .
"It feels like a tear in my heart,
Like a part of me missing,
And I just can't feel it.
I've tried and I've tried
And I've tried.
Tears on my face I can't take it.
If lonely's a taste, then it's all that I'm tasting.
Do you hear my cry?"
~ "Can You Hold Me" by NF ft. Britt Nicole
Something wasn't right.
It was the first thought in Natsu's mind when he practically shot out of bed with a sob in his throat. His fingers clawed helplessly, uselessly at his chest, as if he could try and pry the ache that resided there free and throw it away. It wasn't physical. He knew it wasn't, but it still killed him - still threatened to sweep him away as he desperately sought for someone he didn't know or something he didn' understand.
Something wasn't right.
He'd felt that way for days. Felt that way since he'd seen that damn scarf at that museum, since he'd gone back on his own a few days later to take a closer look at it as well as the items in other cases. it was as if something was missing from his life - several somethings, actually. He couldn't figure it out...couldn't understand it, really. He felt as if one smelled of home and smoke while the other smelled of starlight and sunshine. He couldn't understand why he thought anything would smell like such silly things. He had no clue as to where either thought had come from.
Something wasn't right.
Natsu had tried to speak to his cousins about it. Wendy had been incredibly sympathetic, even worried. She'd soothed him in that way only she could, only the way a young fourteen year old girl in high school could. She'd reassured him that she still loved him and that she didn't think he was crazy no matter what Gajeel said. But the girl had been worried, too, suggesting, "Perhaps you should go to the doctor?"
Gajeel had been incredibly unhelpful, and Natsu had wanted to throttle him for it when he'd said, snickering, "Yeah, go see a doctor for your mind. What are they called...psychiatrist? Therapist? I'll make sure you get food when you're shoved into a mental institution." He'd said as much while shoving his mouth full of cereal, skimming through readings for a class he should have done weeks ago.
Something wasn't right.
Natsu buried his face in his arms after folding so that he could rest it in his lap. He barely bit back the frustrated, longing scream that he wanted to let loose. He didn't have work to do, or school, but both of his cousins had things to do and he didn't want to disrupt their sleep before the sun rose.
Something was missing.
Natsu knew as much as he began to soften his breathing, forcing himself to calm down, to relax. He had no idea what it was, but it had started with that stupid scarf. He reached over and grabbed the phone from his nightstand, wiping the back of his hand against his forehead to swipe away cold sweat that had gathered. He paused, hand pushed halfway through his pink hair when he realized perhaps, just maybe, there was someone who might be able to help him.
Something was missing.
When he dialed Levy McGarden after hunting down her office number on the museum website, he didn't expect her to answer, but he lifted the phone to his ear anyways. He listened to the perky voice ask him to leave a message after a quick explanation and apology, and when there was a beep, he said hesitantly, "This is Natsu Dragneel. I don't know if you remember me, but we chatted back when the local high school came to visit the museum for a research project, and you told me about that weird scarf...I have some questions about it, if you're okay with me coming by to ask 'em. Call me back when you have the time."
Something was missing.
He hung up and contemplated before sighing and turning to go back to sleep - or at least attempt as much. He knew without a doubt that he'd not be getting any sleep, that horrible tug not leaving him in peace as he screwed his eyes shut and buried his face in his pillow.
Something was missing.
He was sorting through one of the boxes in the attic, just beginning really, when he got the call. He answered it immediately, greeting the number he didn't recognize in relief. "I'll meet you at the museum entrance at precisely noon this afternoon," Levy McGarden told him. "One one condition: bring me a sandwich and cookie from the Heartfilia Bakery downtown. I'm friends with the owner and she can't bring my daily lunch tomorrow."
But not for much longer.
Rewritten as of May 7th, 2018!
