Soul Searching 5
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Todays song choice is: Someone to die for – Jimmy Gnecco
Before you landed
I had a will but didn't know what it could do
She grinned at him knowing what he was going to say. It was only fair she had just asked the same question, but now she had to think really think about her answer.
'- why is it me your heart has taken to loving?'. She still lay beneath him, her blonde hair forming a crown around her head; her cheeks were still flushed and made circular rosy patches on her fair skin.
She could barely remember life before she had met the Doctor – it had all become a bit of a blur. She knew he was right though, all she did was get up, go to work, come home, eat chips and go to bed – she lived that life over and over again. When she had met him her life had meaning – he had given her a purpose to live. It didn't matter what anyone else thought, she was Rose Tyler travelling through galaxies and time able to save anyone and anything. With him she was unstoppable – he made her who she was today.
You were abandoned
And still you're handing out what you don't wanna lose
She raised her arms and placed them around his neck, her fingers sinking into his mess of brown hair. She looked into his eyes and knew all the troubles that lay within – the pain of his life before her.
She knew about the Time War, he had told her bits and pieces along the way so that in the end she finally understood the entire story. She knew he was all alone, he had no one left, nothing to return to and no one to hold onto – that was, of course, until he met her. He had taken to her so easily, as though if he didn't get that one last hug he would sink into the depths of the darkness threatening to over ride him and surely die. But now she was there to love him, she was there to hold his hand, she was there to hold him in the dark when his body shook as he remembered the Time War, she was there to comfort him when he couldn't save everyone and she was there to make him laugh in these moments of darkness.
You make me drop things
Like all the plans I had for a life without you
She pulled his head down so that his nose was pressed against hers; she littered Eskimo kisses over his face and ran her fingers through his hair.
It had taken her one minute – 60 entire seconds to decide to jump into a blue box with a complete stranger – and it turned out to be the best decision she had ever made. She had plans for her future – go to work, get married, have kids, and die – all plans that were thrown out of the window the moment she met the Doctor. He was just one of those people you would do anything for – he had one of those faces you just couldn't say no to – and his reasoning always made sense. She would do anything he asked, she knew that if she hadn't met the Doctor her life wouldn't have a purpose –a meaning. When you asked Rose of the future, she would just smile a secret smile for she had seen the future – she didn't know where hers would lead but she knew it would be with the Doctor.
Someone to die for
Someone to fall into when the world goes dark
Rose ran her fingers down the Doctors back, her fingers tracing the strong muscles of his shoulder blades.
She knew she would die for her Doctor, without a moments thought she would willingly jump in front of him to protect him from anything and anyone. She also knew he would do the same for her – she could see it in his eyes, the determination that would come over him and cloud his eyes the moment he thought she was in trouble. The edge that his voice got when he thought of her being hurt, the way he would hold her in his arms when everything was alright in the end whispering words of reassurance into her hair. She treasured moments like these, every time he hugged her, every time he held her heart to his, every time he looked her in the eye and grinned assuring her everything was alright and they would live to see another day. She also knew that however bad things got, however helpless moments seemed he was always there prepared to hold her in his arms and just make her feel safe. She felt so safe in his arms; she knew that if the world was ending around her and there was nothing they could do she would still be safe in his arms. Hiding from the world with her Doctor, she could always rely on him to be there to catch her when she falls, to hold her when she cries, to soothe her when she's scared – he was the only thing she could rely on in their unpredictable lives and she knew that she could rely on him forever.
Someone to die for
Someone to tear a hole in this endless night
Someone like you
Rose closed her eyes as she thought back on her life, she could feel the Doctors body on hers, warming her and comforting her. His hands came to her face and gently stroked her cheeks as she thought; he gently brushed her stands of hair as he watched her lost in her thoughts.
She could get so lonely sometimes; she could sit in her room in the Tardis and lean against the wall huddling into a blanket. Each time she nearly lost him the thoughts in her head became worse and worse, what if one day she did finally lose him? Would she remain trapped on some desolate planet millions of years away from home? Would the Tardis take her back to Earth where she would waste her life away telling stories of the Doctor and thinking of him until his face was merely a blur in her memory and she couldn't remember what it felt like to lye in his arms? Would she spend the rest of her life looking for someone else like him? Wasting the years searching and searching because if she didn't then she would have to accept the fact that there was no one else in the entire universe like him? Rose knew all the troubles and worries that came with loving and travelling with the Doctor, it was a 60 second decision with a lifetime of consequences.
I'm drunk when sober
The room is spinning
You are what I hold on to
Rose opened her eyes and looked at him, she knew that whatever worries she felt or whatever fears she had were nothing in comparison to what the Doctor had been through in the last nine hundred years. She pushed the thoughts to the back of her mind and began to tickle the Doctors ribs. His deep husky laughter filled the room as he began to tickle her – she squealed in delight underneath the touch of his hands.
She loved the moments like these – when everything wasn't life or death. When they could just relax and not have to worry about the fate of everyone and everything, when they weren't deciding the futures of other creatures. She loved just being with him, joking with him, laughing with him, playing silly games with him. They could play snakes and ladders into the night without a care in the world. She loved it when they could just relax and be themselves whether that was playing games, reading books, drawing pictures or just lying under the star dotted sky. She knew that wherever she went and whoever she met nothing would ever be as great as the moments she spent with him – he was her life – and she loved it.
You're taking over
I find that giving in is the best I can do
She pushed the Doctor over so she was now sitting on him, she looked down at him laughter dancing in her eyes, using her hands she pinned him down to the sheet and grinned.
Rose had tried not to love him, she had tried so incredibly hard but everything he did, every look he gave her, and every word he said made her love him more. At first she had tried to resist the feelings but in the end she surrendered to them – she knew that there as no other way. She couldn't ignore them – surely if she kept these feelings inside she would explode – they were that strong.
Someone to die for
Someone to fall into when the world goes dark
Someone to die for
Someone to tear a hole in this endless night
Someone like you
She kissed his nose then lent her forehead against his and locked her eyes with his. A slow smile spread across the Doctors' face as he watched her. She pressed her lips against his and smiled
'My dearest Doctor, you made me real – you brought me to life and made me understand the universe. You showed me things I could never possible imagine – you brought my fantasies to life. You are unique and I know there will never be another person in the whole of time even a little bit like you. I love you so much and forever – you gave me life, hope, freedom, and peace within my mind'
He looked up at her and smiled proudly as her words and their meanings hit home. He stroked her cheek
'Oh Rose' he whispered.
Hope your still liking because there is more to come :-)
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