Fortunately for Hidan, he thought the fact that Wal-Mart was playing various country music selections was wonderful. He enjoyed shopping for oranges and listening to Keith Urban. The oranges were brilliantly stacked in a pyramid. There were naval oranges, tangelo oranges and well, what Hidan would call normal oranges. He decided that the best way to determine what 2 oranges to pick for 'the leader' would be to pray about it. And so Hidan absorbed himself in prayer over the oranges. However, Hidan wasn't in prayer long because a mother with 3 children in a buggy talking on a cell phone ran into him…he was less than thrilled. Hidan had an orange in his hand and he squeezed it until it oozed all over him.

He spun around; face enraged and glared angrily at the woman. "Are you not even watching where the hell you're going? Are you too busy with your cell phone calls to watch where the hell you're pushing your damn cart! God! I mean you have kids are they preoccupying you so you don't know where you're going? God!" Hidan yelled. The woman apologized at least 20 times but that wasn't good enough for Hidan. He continued to yell at her, only to turn redder and redder in the face. "Oh my god! I swear! People like you shouldn't shop here!" Hidan continued yelling and reached around behind him to grab two oranges, unfortunately he reached in all the wrong places and the oranges came tumbling down everywhere. This only made Hidan even angrier.

"Hidan! Hidan! You have got to smell this Axe body wash I mean it's completely…whoa! What happened to you? There are oranges everywhere and that woman is totally freaking out." Kakuzu said looking at the oranges that were still rolling in all directions.

"Shut up…Kakuzu….just shut up…." Hidan said gritting his teeth. We'll check back in with him later.

I the hard candy aisle, Deidara was having a near nervous breakdown and not because of the Tic Tacs…well partially because of the Tic Tacs. See, here's what had happened in the candy aisle: Deidara was trying to decide between the value pack of Tic Tacs (which had 6 individual plastic boxes of Tic Tacs per box) and the individual plastic box of Tic Tacs when an incredibly beautiful blonde female decided she absolutely had to ask Deidara if she could touch his hair…Itachi's answer in this situation would have been 'you can touch anything you want'. Now, Deidara was getting ready to answer he when six customers driving those motorized scooter shopping cart thingys invaded the candy aisle because there was a rollback on after dinner mints, then at least 15 more people flooded the same aisle in order to take advantage of the rollback on Strawberry Pocky; then two Wal-Mart employees hurried to the aisle with ladders to get to the top shelves in order to pull down some more after dinner mints and to restock. All of this rush to the candy aisle for the savings caused this chain reaction: Scooter guy runs over blonde girl, blonde girl falls into Deidara, Deidara falls under ladder and gets wedged between the Blow-Pops, the gummi bears, and the chocolate covered raisins. So here he was…no Tic Tacs and a beautiful blonde straddling him…not that this was terribly unusual…but this was definitely a problem….where was his danna when he needed him?

"You know what I hate?" Sasori said to Kisame.

"No, what?" Kisame asked.

"Well, it says super absorbent paper towels but the last time there was a major spill I used these paper towels and they were most definitely not super absorbent." Sasori was working on the list that the seven of them had brought. "Screw it! I'm getting paper towels with the normal level of absorption!" Sasori said throwing nine rolls of paper towels into the buggy (which was already overflowing with groceries and other stuff from where everyone had been getting sidetracked). So there were the magazine, the endless hair care products, the socks and the underwear, all of the leader's things (minus the Tic Tacs), somewhere along the lines, Zetsu had picked up a 20 pound turkey, paper plates and 3 twelve packs of beer. But then Kakuzu decided that wasn't enough beer and so he got 6 more 12 packs, 7 boxed macaroni and cheese dinners and here came Itachi…oh god….

Zetsu and Sasori looked at Itachi and then looked at what he had just carried through at least half the store. Kisame had run of to enter the raffle for the Kayak…Hidan and Kakuzu were now fighting in the oranges, and Deidara…well it was hard to tell with him… So Zetsu and Sasori looked at Itachi and then glanced down, looked at Itachi and glanced down again. This pattern continued for some time.

"Itachi….there are 90 condoms in that box!" Sasori said.

"Yeah, and you know they can't call it family size…so what's a box that big called?" Zetsu asked.

"Okay, look…it's not a family size, it's called a bonus pack and these are the ultra thins…which are also ultra hard to find…and yes there are 90…but there are 2 of us that get laid all the time, one of us that will get laid sometimes (Hidan) and one more of us that gets laid occasionally when he's not a puppet! Now you try to tell me that the bonus pack isn't a smart financial decision!" Itachi put his hand on his hip and glared…he only did that when he was doing that 'I dare you to challenge me' drama routine. Neither Sasori not Zetsu said anything…instead they were off to the frozen vegetables…