Neurotic


Summary: "My name's not Chris Perry," Chris said, as if it was the hardest thing he'd ever had to say. "It's Christopher." He paused, almost reluctantly. "Christopher Halliwell."

Disclaimer: Charmed and Chris don't belong to me, doo dah, doo dah, I'm not making any money from this, oh, dah doo dah day.


Chapter The Eighteenth


Sigmund sighed as he picked up the polishing rag he'd dropped for the twentieth time already this morning. As the days crawled on forwards, and their attempts to stop Wyatt increased, he'd grown more and more nervous that the Charmed Ones would find out.

Leaning over the crystal ball on the desk, he picked it up and morosely began to polish it. If he'd only learned to develop his third eye in divination classes… but fortune telling had never been where his talents had lain.

The door slamming open caught his attention, and he looked up to see Gideon storm in. Frustration was clear on the Elder's face.

"Yes, as a matter of fact there is," Gideon said, his eyebrows drawing together as he sat down at his chair, brooding. Sigmund moved to face him, worry almost tangible in his expression. "I think they're onto us."

"What?" Sigmund knew he'd squeaked, and he flushed ungainly.

"The Charmed Ones are pursuing a friends angle," Gideon said, musing darkly. "They seem to think Wyatt will be harmed by someone close to him."

"Well that's not automatically us, is it?" Sigmund asked, arching one eyebrow. He dropped the rag, deliberately this time.

"The interfering Whitelighter from the future, Chris Perry, seems to think it is us," Gideon said heavily. "He's drawn up a list of suspects, and I am on the top of the list."

Sigmund's eyes widened. "But… how?"

Gideon shrugged. "I do not know. Perhaps some future knowledge that the girls are currently unaware of. I think- we have to implement our plan."

Sigmund frowned. "I-"

"Not that one, you blathering fool," Gideon snapped. "Get Corr and Clea for me, and then call a meeting of the Elders. It's about time they started to realise about the witches that are going missing, and why…"


Chris sunk onto the table and hid his head in his arms. "Twenty-eight days," he moaned into his arms, the words clear despite being muffled. "We're doomed."

"We are with that attitude," Phoebe chided. She was sat perched on the end of a chair, her hands dancing over her keyboard as she researched the location of old flames.

Chris lurched up and fixed a dirty glance at her. "You sound like your Grams," he said, accusingly.

"Finally, a compliment," Phoebe said, her eyes sparkling at him from over the edge of the monitor.

"Right, that's it, I'm going down there," Chris decided, getting to his feet. "I'm tired of sitting around!"

"God, I am totally empathising with you there," Piper grouched from over in the living room. "If I can't go up and help Paige and Pippa make that reducing potion, you can't go underground until we've figured out how come you're sprouting an evil power."

Chris blinked at her, and pouted.

"That expression won't work on me, young man," Piper warned. Chris rolled his eyes and sank back down onto his seat.

"Well, can I-" Chris started.

"No!" Piper said sharply. "You can not go and help them with the potion. If you're being affected my some external forces, we can't afford for some of it to be translated to a potion."

"Aw, man!" Folding his arms, Chris glared at the table. "How about-"

"Book of Shadows is mine, mister," Piper growled.

"Well-"

"There's nothing that needs cleaning or to be cooked or to be watered," Piper said, a little loudly. "You just sit there and be a good boy and keep quiet."

"Yes, mom," Chris said, sarcasm lacing his voice even as he inwardly smirked. He looked over at Phoebe. "Any leads?"

"No," Phoebe said, pulling a face. "There are a lot of the guys still in San Francisco, though, so we'll probably need some extra research on where they are. Maybe we can scry for them… It would be better if we could talk to Darryl, see if any of them have criminal records…"

"Oh, give your computer here," Chris snapped, grabbing the computer away from Phoebe before she could blink. She exchanged a long look across Chris' head with Piper. Chris' fingers started flying across the keyboard, and he didn't look away from the screen as he typed furiously for a few minutes. Eventually he passed the laptop back to Phoebe, smirking.

Phoebe's mouth fell open. "You hacked into the police?" She asked.

"That's so cool!" Piper said, getting up from her seat and waddling over. She shoved Chris out of the way a little. "Hey, you could totally abuse this…"

Phoebe slapped Piper's hands away as Piper reached for it. "Huh, Chris, maybe we should look at the angle of Wyatt's mother being the one that turns her."

"Huh, maybe," Chris said, arching a look at Piper. "You know, screw this. I'm going down there. You girls have fun." He rolled his eyes and orbed away. Phoebe gaped.

"Damn boy! I coulda gone with him…" Muttering, the police website already forgotten, Piper stomped off upstairs before Phoebe could stop her.

Phoebe blinked. "Okay, what the hell just happened there?" She demanded the empty room.

Orb lights started to fall in front of her, and she blinked, and exhaled in relief. "Thank god you've seen sense, Chris-" she started, and then jumped, startled, as Leo solidifiedin front of her.

"What do you mean by that?" Leo demanded, instantly looking worried. Phoebe got a rush of concern about Chris, and was puzzled by it.

"Uh, hello to you too," she said, a little perturbed. "Chris seems to be developing an evil power. Apparently while Dan was over here, fire came out of his hands."

"Fire throwing isn't purely an evil power," Leo said, frowning. "A witch with that power, actually, was discovered missing this morning by her Whitelighter." He paused, as her words hit her. "Dan?"

Phoebe winced. "Dan Gordon?" She phrased it like a question, not wanting to hurt him when she realised her mistake. "Sorry, Leo. Paige phoned him up in our big research session, and it turns out he's moved back here. And for some reason, he knows about demons and magic. We had to have him over, Leo. If it helps, he's one of our prime suspects now," she added, brightly.

Leo's expression was a bit drawn, but he smiled a little at her last comment. "Yeah. Anyway, Chris?"

"Well, we told him to stay here, just in case some external power is affecting him, but he stormed off to the underworld," Phoebe said, grimacing. "And Piper was quite grumpy too, come to think of it. Maybe they've had an argument, or something…"

"Maybe," Leo said, but his face was tense, as if he was thinking something else. "Uh, are Piper and Paige upstairs?"

"Yeah," Phoebe said.

"Come on. I need a word with the three of you," Leo said.

"So witches have been going missing?" Paige asked. "How come we haven't heard of it until now?"

Leo shrugged. "It's been quite quiet," he said, "and we've no idea where they're disappearing to."

"I've an idea," a voice said. Chris orbed in. He looked highly pleased with himself, and he had a videotape in his hand.

"What's that?" Piper asked suspiciously. Pippa's eyes narrowed in thought.

"If a girl named Sadako made that, I'm not watching it," Paige warned.

"Don't joke about that," Chris said, "a particular nasty video curse will be circulated in the next six years or so. A lot of people will die."

"Chris!" Pippa warned. "Future consequences!"

"Screw future consequences," Chris muttered, but he stayed resolutely quiet for a moment as he glowered at the floor. "This is a tape of a new show that's pretty popular down there at the minute."

"A television show? From down there?" Piper shrugged, and grabbed the tape from Chris. "Heh, let's watch it. Can't be any worse than the crap that's on TV normally."

She made to move downstairs. Phoebe frowned, and put a hand on her sister's arm to stop her.

"Piper-" Phoebe started. Piper wrenched her arm away with more force than usual, and Phoebe fell back a couple of steps. She looked at Piper in alarm. Chris laughed. "What the hell is up with you two?" She demanded, looking between her heavily pregnant sister and Chris in disbelief.

"Seriously, Pheebs, just chill," Piper said, rolling her eyes and heading towards the stairs. "Let's go watch this."

"I'm in," Chris said softly, a smile on his face as he moved to follow her down the stairs. Leo, Pippa, Paige and Phoebe exchanged worried looks. Leo looked at Pippa hesitantly. Pippa noticed his look.

"Don't look at me," Pippa said quietly. "These events are completely different from the ones I went through. This reality show happened, though, although quite a few months later. A lot of witches died before we discovered it."

"Well, then, it's a good thing we've discovered it now," Paige said grimly. "If we can save more innocents, it's a good thing, right?"

"Right," Phoebe said, troubled.

"What is it?" Leo asked Phoebe. "You look troubled…"

"Oh, it's nothing much," Phoebe said. Her chocolate brown eyes were dark with worry. "Normally I can't feel much from Chris or Piper, but I felt… darkness from them. A very familiar… hatred."

"Then something must be affecting them," Paige said. "We'll have more chance figuring out what it is if we watch them closer."

They nodded, and headed downstairs.

Chris had put the videotape in moments before they arrived downstairs, and he'd settled back in a sprawl on one of the chairs with the remote control pointed at the machine.

"I've made some drinks," Piper said grouchily as she walked slowly into the kitchen, holding her back. "Paige, you'll bring them in, won't you?"

Paige nodded, concern washing over her pale heart-shaped face as she walked out to the kitchen. Phoebe, Pippa and Leo sat down silently to watch the television. Paige came back in with the tray of drinks.

"Hey, bring mine first!" Piper snapped. Wrinkling her nose, Paige scurried over and gave it to her. Piper fairly growled at her over the edge of her mug as she took a sip of her coffee. The others exchanged a glance as Chris pressed play.

Flames flickered across the screen, and a cheesy opening music blared out. A title "Witch Wars" blazed across the screen, along with some still images of some frightened young women and scary large demons.

"Welcome to Witchwars! Tonight, let's watch our Gamesmasters take on three special candidates! One witch has the power to soar, one has lightning, one has cyrokinesis… will any survive? It'll be winner takes all, and we will take all. Their lives… and their powers!..."

They watched in horror the thirty-minute show, as large demons chased down young witches barely out of their teens, and killed them in slow agonising ways. Paige and Phoebe both wanted to stop after the first death, but Chris and Piper wouldn't let them. As the ending credits rolled, and Phoebe took down the names of the demons listed to add to the Map to vanquish, an extra segment crackled into life.

"Next week, tune in to Witchwars as we tackle the legendary Charmed Ones!" Still images of Paige, Phoebe and Piper crackled onto screen. "Watch as we take their lives, their powers, and and last but not least, their progeny…"

"We've found it," Paige said in realisation, as static filled the screen. She looked at the others, who looked as if they agreed. "The ones who turn Wyatt!"