Okay so I know this update is along time coming, I just couldn't come up with anything other than anger after the finale. It's hard to write for Derek when he's a McJerk. Anyway, all hope is not lost! YET!

It was after 2am when Derek finally started to make his way back to the trailer. He knew Addison would be long asleep, which was fine with him. He wasn't ready to talk to her yet. He hadn't quiet figured out exactly how to tell her what he had done, even though he had a hunch that she might already know, or at least suspect something. Derek had never been good at hiding things from her; she was always able to read him like a book.

He had just sat there, in the grass for a while tonight, after he had shed his tears, thinking back over the last year; how one day could change everything. In one second his life as he knew it had ended; the day he got a call from the ER telling him Addison and Hadley had been in an accident. He knew before he ever got there what was going to be waiting for him, he could feel it. Derek had barely reached Addison to ask her what happened, when the Doctor had came out of the trauma room with a look on his face that told the story before he even said a word.

Derek opened the door to the trailer and stepped inside just long enough to make sure that Addison was asleep; she was and he said a quick thanks to no one in particular. He wasn't ready for the confrontation that he knew was coming.

Sitting there tonight he had realized what an ass he had been, how he had constantly tortured Addison since she had showed up, and how he had used Meredith as a way to keep himself from getting hurt again; the whole time stringing along two women

He walked back outside and sat down in one of the chairs. He wished he could take back what had happened at the prom with Meredith, because Addison would leave him for sure. She had already stuck around and taken more than her share from him, she wouldn't stick around any longer, not after this. But then again, it took tonight for Derek to realize that Meredith was nothing more than an infatuation.

He was still thinking about what he was going to do, and how he was going to make this right, when he drifted off to sleep.

Addison awoke the next morning to find herself alone in their bed. "Well, I guess after last night he decided to go be with Meredith" she thought. She got out of the bed and kneeled down beside it, reaching under and pulling out her Louie Vitton suitcase. She then walked over to the small closet and started getting her things ready to pack up. She was fixing to be out of the tin can once and for all.

Addison glanced around the trailer, looking for a note or something to tell her where her soon to be ex was. "The bastard could show a small amount of consideration and at least tell her he was leaving." she thought. "After eleven years of marriage you'd think he could do a little more than leave, but then again he is great at running away."

She was tired of Seattle, tired of everyone looking at her like she had destroyed their Meredith, and tired of Derek treating her like shit.

Addison quickly changed into the jeans and shirt she had on the night before, brushed her hair and then pulled it back with a baseball cap. Today she didn't care.

It was as she was in the process of filling up the rest of her suitcase with her shoes that she heard the door to the trailer open, and a disheveled Derek stepped in. He took one look at her, and the suitcase and said, "Addison wait. Let's not rush to anything here."

"Derek I've thought about this, there's no use in pretending anymore, it's over. And you need a shower you look like hell." There was only sarcasm in her voice.

"Addy we can fix this, you don't have to leave, I know I've been an ass but please," he pleaded with her.

"Well I thought we were fixing this, until you screwed your little intern last night, now I'm done. You can have her, you can even throw a party celebrating the fact that you finally managed to run off Satan.."

"Addison please, I'm begging you, I'm so sorry about last night. You have no idea how I bad I feel about what I did to you, but I needed last night to realize how much I love you, and that I want you in my life forever."

"You needed last night to realize how much you loved me, what Derek it took her walking away to make you think, hey I don't have to be alone, I'll just go back to Addison! That isn't happening any time soon babe. Not ever! Derek not only did you cheat on me, but you did it where we work, with somebody that I have to work with, and you no what, it's probably all over the hospital by now considering all gossip spreads like wildfire there. So how in the hell do you think I can work there now, seeing Meredith everyday? It was hard enough the first time, but now? Not to mention the fact that the one time I cheated on you I paid for it ten times over, so no I'm sorry for what I did is going to get you off the hook." She screamed at him. And with that Addison zipped up her suitcase and started for the door.

"Please, let's talk, Ad," he begged her. "I'm done talking Derek, now move out of my way." He obediently stepped out of her way as she made her way out of the trailer and to her car. She popped her trunk and put her suitcase in, the whole while Derek was still begging her to stay.

"Addison I know I made a mistake, but if you'll give me another chance I swear to god I'll make it up to you. I love you, I always have and I always will. Come on mow, lets talk about this."

"Derek, I have loved you for so long, and I have cried too many tears over you the last year. I didn't just lose my daughter, I lost you too. But after what's happened, the stuff you've put me through, the pain you've caused me, I'd be more of a fool to stay longer than I already have. So just as soon as I finish up with my patients today, I'm going back to New York. That's where my family is, where my home is, and where my child is buried. Goodbye Derek." And with that Addison leaned in and kissed him lightly on the lips.

She then got into her car, and pulled away, leaving him speechless and crying. He stood there watching her taillights, hoping against all hope that she would stop and turn around, but she didn't, she didn't even tap her brakes. She just kept going. How was he ever going to get her back now?