Neurotic


Disclaimer: Charmed does not belong to me.

Summary: His name is not Chris Perry. It's Christopher. Christopher Halliwell.

Dedicated to: TriGemini and Sparkling Cherries, for the lovely in-depth reviews, make me feel the little details I put in are appreciated. :)

Thanks: to everyone else who has reviewed. And to everyone who's got this far in the story and hasn't given up. Thanks!


Chapter the Forty-Seven

"I was feeling like a demon again"


Chris edged a look at Paige on the couch, and hated his brother with so much fervour that he felt sick. She was shuddering. If she didn't get enough food for a month, and soon, then she would die. And it would be all his fault.

But if Wyatt gets hold of the Book of Words…

"I don't have it," Chris said, his voice loud, and ringing with much more confidence than he felt.

Wyatt's face didn't change, didn't move at all. Chris swallowed, and tried to face down his brother with as much confidence and strength as he could muster.

"I don't believe you," Wyatt said, his voice cool.

"Not believing me won't get you the book," Chris said, his eyes darkening. "I can't give you the book. I don't have it."

Wyatt smiled then, his eyes ice-cold. "And I said, I don't believe you."

"Then I guess this is a stalemate," Chris said.

"I guess so."

"I can't believe you're smiling when you outlawed it," Chris said lightly, trying to look around without being too obvious, checking to see what Paige had managed before her accident.

"Hypocrisy is fun, you should try it."

"Hm," Chris said, pretending to think about it. "How about no?"

"How about Paige dies if you don't give me the book."

"I can't."

"How about I give you the book?"

That was another voice, one unexpected by either brother, and it caught them both off guard. Wyatt turned to see his mother standing there, heavily pregnant but with a very large volume in her hands, one of the books Pippa had used to stack up for a footrest for Piper before. Before Wyatt could twitch, she threw the book at him.

He caught it easily, his eyes narrowing in rage, but it was just the amount of time Chris needed.

Without thinking, without planning it, Chris put his hand out, with every intention of using his powers to throw some of the potions at him, but something else whistled through the air into his hand. Chris looked at it blankly for a second. Excalibur.

Wyatt recognised it at the same time Chris did, for he narrowed his eyes even further, and gestured at the sword, but it held firm in Chris' gasp. Wyatt's eyes opened, and Chris forgot to think, he just focussed his powers directly on the sword, and it slid out of his hand. He thought for a moment he'd lost it to Wyatt, until it flew solidly through the air and impacted through Wyatt's shoulder with a crunch.

Wyatt let out a grunt of pain, and bodily yanked Excalibur out of his hand, and Chris extended his hand again. Excalibur whistled back to him, and Chris took it, holding it towards Wyatt as menacingly as possible.

"I. Don't. Have. The. Book," Chris said, his voice low.

"Very well." Wyatt's eyes flashed. "If you won't give it to me, I'll have to take it by force."

He scowled, and shimmered away.

It was like the entire room breathed a sigh of relief.

Piper waddled forwards, her eyes worriedly dropping between Chris and Paige, so worried that she didn't flinch when Paul orbed in with a crate of water.

"What happened?" Paul demanded, at the same time as Piper. The two shared a look, glanced at Paige, then at Chris, holding Excalibur.

"Uh," Chris said, a little dazed, looking at the edge of the sword, staring at the blood that dropped from it to the floor beneath. "I, uh- Paige got hit by an aging potion, so she's a month older. We need to re-hydrate her, and I need to get her food. And Wyatt came, but I-" Chris twitched the sword a little. "Yeah." He stared at the sword, a worried expression on his face.

Piper was torn between her son and Paige, but put her arm on his elbow. "What's wrong?"

"I can't kill him." Chris said, his voice soft, his eyes liquid. "I mean, I've wanted to, for ages, but all the venom I could muster only…" He looked down at the blood, shaking his head. "I guess I knew I wasn't capable of it, all the times I could have just erased Wyatt by killing his previous self, but…" He looked up at Piper, his eyes hard. "Sorry. I've got to get some food into Paige, fast."

He brushed past Piper, his hand whistling out, letting Excalibur slide from his hand and back into the stone, and he stormed down the stairs, knowing they were watching him go, and not caring.


"YENENE!"

Wyatt's voice was rough, like sandpaper, and he clutched onto his shoulder hard.

There was no response.

He staggered further into the cave. "NENE!"

A wizened old face peered out of the shadows, and clucked discontentedly at him. "What's all the fuss about? No need to shout, I'm right here." She bustled out from the crag, and shuffled over to one of her tables, plucking off a vial of potion. "Here." She tossed it to him.

He caught it with his good hand, and poured it on his wound. His shoulder smoked, and he yelped in pain, but when the smoke dissipated, his shoulder was fixed, no wound, only the blood and ripped shirt evidence of the injury Chris had given him.

"What happened?" Yenene asked.

"My worthless brother," Wyatt said, snarling. "I need you to make me a Calling."

"No."

Wyatt's head snapped up, and he stared at her. "No?"

"No," Yenene said, firmly. "You promised if I did what you asked, then you would return me to my mortal self, unchanged." She wandered back over to the tables. "And you haven't. I haven't even seen any evidence that you even can."

"I know who you are," Wyatt said, his voice low. "Would I be able to turn you back if I didn't?"

Yenene turned. "Knowing my name won't be enough," she said. "You need other things, and I just don't believe you have them."

Wyatt snarled. "I'm your only hope. You've been promised a thousand times by a thousand different people that they could do this. And none of them have delivered. Not even the Seer, and she had access to the Source. I'm the only one with the power you seek. I'm the one who can turn you back to your mortal self."

"Your words are pretty, but I'm old, Mr. Halliwell. I've seen a thousand years in this body, and seen countless depravities, and even more deceptions. I'm tired of it," Yenene said. She sagged, her fatigue obvious.

"Make me a Calling," Wyatt said, his teeth gritted together.

"No."

"No?" Wyatt shrugged. "Oh well. Guess I'll be seeing you around then, Miss. Gordon." He turned to leave, smirking at her sudden intake of breath.

"What did you call me?" Yenene demanded.

"Miss. Gordon," Wyatt repeated.

"How did you-" And Yenene looked so fragile, that beneath that frail body, in her eyes, her expressive dark eyes, she looked so young, like the person still trapped within her was.

"Your name," Wyatt said. "Yenene. A Miwok Indian name, if I recall correctly. Meaning literally 'wizard poisoning a sleeping person'. I presumed at first you had chosen it as just a good name for a mortal in your… situation… but it's quite simply a derivation of 'Jenny', isn't it."

Yenene looked at him, then looked away, flushed.

"I will change you back," Wyatt said, "and I won't tell anyone your dirty secrets. Imagine how you'd be treated if they found out you'd been serving evil for the last thousand years."

"I had to!" Yenene said forcefully, angry. "It was only last month I broke out of it, and then you-" She looked at him, disgusted.

"What's one more terrible act?" Wyatt said smoothly. He was good at persuading people to his own way of things, and he could visibly see Yenene cracking.

Yenene tilted her head upwards. "And how will I know you'll turn me back after I've done the Calling for you?"

"Because your uncle, Dan Gordon, is involved with my aunt Paige," Wyatt said. "I'm telling you this on trust. Now you know where to find him, you could even turn yourself back. But in return for this information, if you don't do the Calling for me, I will kill him. And your mom, and your dad, and anyone else in the world you even cracked a smile at."

Yenene stilled, shivered, and then nodded. "All right. I'll do the Calling, but you turn me back." She looked at him hard. "Immediately."

"Then it's a deal, Jenny Gordon." Wyatt nodded and smiled.

Yenene frowned, flinched, and shook his outstretched hand.


"What's in this one?"

Chris rolled his eyes, and steadfastly pushed the straw towards her. "It's a strawberry cheesecake milkshake," he said.

Paige looked at him suspiciously, as suspiciously as she could considering she felt like a truck had hit her, reversed over her, driven over her, reversed back, and driven over her again. She also felt dirty, smelt like a manure factory, and was still completely bewildered at how come the family was still all packed up there despite the atrocious smell.

Piper had cleaned it up twice already, making some quip about diapers and practise for baby Chris, which had caused Chris no small amount of embarrassment too, but it was still coming out of her with no end in sight, and Paige was sore and cranky about it. Added to that the concoctions that Chris was making her eat…

It had started off with her having to eat a block of lard, which normally she would have freaked out at (and promised him detention for a month, if his earlier comments about her being his teacher were true) but when Dan had brought it to her mouth, she'd almost inhaled it. It had smelt really good, and her body was obviously craving the fat.

On the plus side, she reckoned, her body must have eaten up a whole lot of the little bits of excess fat she had. When she'd voiced that thought out loud, she'd gotten a whole host of crazy stares, and Piper had patted her own stomach pointedly.

Now, Chris had raided the kitchen for any food containing all the other things she was missing out on, now her body was processing fat again, and this new one sounded weird.

"It's good," Chris said, and then drank a little of it himself. He blinked twice, owlishly. "It really is good." He frowned a little. "Are you feeling okay? 'cause I think you've eaten enough-"

The waft of the drink floated down to Paige, and her nose wrinkled. She'd never enjoyed food this much in her life. She loved the smell of food when she was hungry, and when she was hungry she ate, and then didn't like the smell of food any more. Now she was perpetually hungry, and her body was processing it like no end (a side effect of the potion, Chris had explained) and she was enjoying it. And she knew, at the moment she smelled it, that she really wanted that milkshake.

"What's in it?" Paige said, trying to push herself into more of an upright position, squelching a little and being held back by Dan.

"Strawberry cheesecake, milk, cream and ice-cream, just blended together," Chris said, reluctantly holding it out to Dan. "We went through a phase as kids when we would put anything in a milkshake. It's a great way to do it."

Paige yanked the milkshake off Dan, and gulped at the thick drink. "Huh," she said, eloquently, drinking the rest of it in one go.

"I think she liked it," Dan offered with a grin as Paige sheepishly lowered the glass. She scooped out some of the milkshake stuck to the side of the glass.

"You'll have to teach me that," Paige said. "As compensation for aging a month in five minutes."

Chris rolled his eyes, and then twisted as Paul approached the sofa, wrinkling his nose at the smell.

"Okay," Paul said, "I've finished explaining it to Cole and Granddad. They're a little fuzzy on the details, but Cole is trying to write down everything he's ever heard about Elders, and mom," he flickered a guilty look to Paige for a second that Paige caught and wondered about, "is looking through the Book of Shadows, for news on the Book of Words and anything we can use to track down and hurt Gideon."

"Tell her to avoid the Book of Words," Chris said, his voice low. "It's inconsequential."

"But if Wyatt gets a hold of it-" Paul started, worried.

"He won't," Chris said, his voice flat, his gaze locked with Paul's.

"Then you do have it," Paul accused.

Chris looked at him. "No."

"But-"

"But I know where it is," Chris said. "And I know Wyatt won't get it in a million years."

Paul sent him a dirty look as he moved away over to where Piper was sat with the book.

Paige held her stomach, and groaned a little. Dan and Chris both turned their attention to her immediately.

"I feel so lousy," Paige said, pulling a face. "And I want a shower."

Chris grinned. "You really don't change," he said simply, shaking his head. He looked at Dan. "Uh, you'll be okay helping her, right?" Dan nodded. "I think she's had enough food and water, but take some in with you into the bathroom. If she gets any twinges or pain, give her some more. If it gets much worse, call me." He pulled a face. "But only if it's an emergency."

Dan nodded. "What are you-"

"I'm going to call-" Chris started, and then stuttered out, "Leo" as a blaze of blue lights came down and solidified into the form of his father. "Leo," Chris said, "I was just about to call you."

Leo looked at him, a look of anguish on his face. "Gideon's gone to ground," Leo said, his voice flint-hard. "And the Elders won't do anything about it. I'm here to help you find him." He looked at Chris, who nodded.

"I agree," Chris said. "We do need to find him. And fast." He looked over at Piper, in the corner, nestled up with the book, but looking over at them, worried. He lowered his voice. "I can't risk mom being stressed much more. If she goes into premature labour… There's been enough chaos in this house as it is. We have to do this quietly, together, and fast. No more chaos."

"Right," Leo said, just as quietly. "What did happen here anyway?"

Chris' face settled into a tight line. "Long story," he said. "Potion gone awry, and-"

He fell silent as a sudden darkness passed over the attic, and he shivered.

"Wha-"

CRASH!

All faces turned to the window. A flurry of wings was beating against the windows, accompanied by a large cacophony of howling, shrieking voices.

There was a spray of what looked like lightning, and the windows imploded inwards, spraying glass and timber into the room as the demons started to claw their way into the attic…


T - 6