It was Sunday. It was soon the funeral. Kirsten was sitting by the table in her bedroom. She didn't want to go. She didn't want to say good bye to him. She cried, as usual. The past few days she had done nothing but cry.
She heard a faint knock on the door and Seth came in.
"We must leave now, mum" He was sad, but was trying to be strong, for his mother. He hated to see her sad. When he had been a kid, if his mum were crying for some reason, maybe after a fight with Caleb, all he had to do was to go up to her and hug her, then he sat down on her lap. That always made her smile. That didn't work now.
"I can't." she whispered. He looked at her.
"Please, mum. He is gonna be there. Dad. He told me when I saw him. You can see him," Seth said. Kirsten finally looked at her son.
"Is he gonna be there? I still don't know, I can't just go and accept that he is really gone"
Seth nodded. "Come now, mum. It won't be like that, you can still see him, you know that." He walked towards her and held out his hand. She looked at it before grabbing it. She got to her feet and they started to walk to the car.
"Thanks. I love you Seth" she said when they were walking down the stairs.
"I love you too, mum" was the response he gave her. She still didn't smile.
Ryan was already waiting in the car. He drove, and thought about Sandy; the only real father he had ever had. He was going over his speech in his head one more time, he'd been up very late last night to make sure it was good enough.
They arrived to the church, Julie was waiting for them. She was also very sad, Sandy had been a good man, he hadn't deserved to die so young. She saw the Cohen's walking towards her. Poor Kirsten! She was wearing a black dress and she looked down onto the ground.
They met up with Julie, Kirsten looked at her friend, then hugged her. Julie responded, holding Kirsten tight, she whispered "I'm so sorry". Kirsten barely nodded.
Neither she nor Seth had noticed that Sandy was watching them from behind, as opposed to earlier he was now wearing black. Black shirt, black tie, black pants and a black jacket.
It hurt to see them all so sad, even Julie was close to tears, his wife was already crying.
And Ryan! Now he had lost two fathers. Poor kid! He watched them as they walked into the church. He followed.
It was time for Ryan's speech. He got up and stood in front of all the people in the church.
Seth was holding Kirsten's hand, they were both crying, Julie sat on the other side of Kirsten, also crying.
Ryan began to speak. "Two years ago, my brother and I stole a car, the police caught us. He was over eighteen, so he ended up in jail, I was underage. I met my new lawyer, Sandy Cohen. First I thought that he was like all the other adults, you know. Trying to help cause it is their job. But when my mum picked me up, he gave me his number, said I should call him if I needed to talk. When we got home, mum kicked me out, she was pissed off and drunk. I called Sandy and he picked me up. He let me stay in his home, and after a little time involving a visit in juvie and a visit from my mum, the Cohen's agreed to let me stay, they became my guardians. All that, because Sandy believed that I wasn't a felon, when everybody else did. My real dad is in jail, and he wasn't so much for the dad thing. Sandy became the father I never had." He took a breath and looked at Kirsten, she was playing with her wedding rings while listening to him, tears were running fast down her cheeks.
"He was a great man, always trying to do the right thing. He only did one awful thing in his life, that was dying. He will not soon be forgotten. Thanks for listening" Ryan was now crying silently, he went back to his seat next to a crying Marissa. She took his hand.
Sandy was standing right next to the entrance doors, he had heard everything. Tears slipped out from under his eyelids.
A couple of men, including Seth and Ryan, carried Sandy's coffin. Kirsten was once again crying in Julie's arms.
Half an hour later, Ryan, Seth, Summer, Marissa, Julie and Kirsten were standing in the beautiful garden outside the church.
"I could have stopped this from happening" Kirsten said sadly.
"What do you mean? It wasn't your fault." Julie said.
"He loved the ocean. I wonder just how many times he tried to get me into the water. But he loved me too. If I had asked him not to go surfing that…that day, he would have listened to me, he would have stayed home to keep me company. But I didn't! I knew how much he wanted to go to the beach. I just wish he had known how much I wanted him to stay. Can you imagine just how much I regret I didn't told him!" her voice shook, tears streaming more than ever.
She looked up, her gaze fell to left of a big tree, right were Sandy was standing. She could tell by the look on his face that he had heard her. She stared at him, Seth looked in the same direction, and saw him too.
Sandy couldn't believe that Kirsten was putting this upon herself! It was his fault. He knew the waves were dangerously high, still he decided to get out, only he never came back alive.
He needed to talk to her. He waved at her to come over to him. But Julie said something and all of them walked off towards the car. He sighed. Then he saw her. Coming right towards him, she didn't look happy.
"Hey honey" he smiled.
"Hey Sandy" was the short answer he got.
"I heard what you said, and it wasn't your fault. It was an accident". She looked into his eyes.
"You're right" she said. "It wasn't my fault. It was yours"
