Emmett PoV
"Ungggg" I groaned, everything hurt. My body felt stiff all over and my head was pounding fiercely.
I must have passed out in the hall again. Great, now my body is going to be achy and sore all day. Why didn't Isabella help me to bed? She always took care of me when I got drunk. Where was that sister of mine?
I wasn't surprised that she was avoiding me, she hated when I would get drunk, and she hated the hangovers even more. If I'm being honest with myself, she hated a lot of things about me these days. She doesn't get it. No one does.
I didn't just become an orphan when our father died, I also became Bella's sole guardian that day. I mean sure, I could have sent her back to live with Miss Victoria, but I knew father wouldn't have wanted that for her. No, he would rather she stay with me so that we could be there for one another.
In the haze of my hangover, I found myself remembering back to the final moments I had with my father.
Flashback
It was late, Bella had already gone to bed after I had ensured her that father was going to be alright. We had to believe that he would, because if we didn't, he was as good as dead already.
After I was sure that Bella was sleeping I quickly and quietly made my way into father's room to check up on him.
"Father? Are you awake?" I whispered as I made my way to the chair beside his bed.
"Emmett? What are you still doing *cough…cough* up?"
I moved to the table by the bed side to pour a glass of water, and as I helped father to sit against the headboard so that he could drink I spoke.
"I wanted to see how you were doing. You've given Bella and me quite the scare ya' know."
"I know, and I'm sorry, the last thing I wanted was to worry you kids with something like this."
I had to role my eyes at that one, father was always putting us first, and while I was beyond grateful for him, I wished that when it came to health, he would prioritize himself a bit more.
"It will take a lot more than a little ailment to take you from us, I'm not worried." I joked hoping to lighten the mood a bit, though I didn't know if I could believe that. Father chuckled at my humor, just as he always did, but the laughter didn't reach his eyes. He went to say something but was sent into a coughing fit.
"I should leave you to rest father, I'm sure Dr. Gerandy would agree." I said making to stand and leave him to rest. Before I could fully leave my seat father reached out and weakly grabbed at my arm. I looked up and our eyes met, I could see a steely determination set in his brow.
"Emmett," he said sighing, "I want you to promise me that no matter what you and Bella will be there for each other."
I made to say something in retaliation, I didn't like the turn this conversation was taking. I couldn't handle even thinking about losing him too. But before I could speak, he squeezed my arm with was I assumed was all his strength.
"I am not giving up my boy, but you can never be too prepared. I say these things because I love you both dearly." He coughed again, I offered him the glass of water once more, and he continued. "When we lost your mother… well, I know that it tore you up, but Bella was just a babe, I am the only parent she has ever known. So, by the chance that something does happen to me, you must promise me that you will be there for her as I know she will be for you. Promise me Emmett."
I had to fight back the tears which were brimming in my eyes. I couldn't be weak when father needed for me to be strong. I wanted nothing more than to believe without a doubt that he was going to pull through, but I couldn't. I had never seen my father so weak, and it made me fear the worst, but he was right, I had to be there for Bella. So, I swallowed back the lump that had formed in my throat and spoke with resolve.
"You have my word father; I will do everything I can to be there for Bella."
End Flashback
If I had thought my head was aching before it was pounding now. I felt a wave of deep guilt rock through me. If father could see me now, he would be so furious… no, not furious, he would be sorely disappointed with me. I had broken my last promise to him. That promise had been the last words I spoke to my father before he passed. I mean, yeah, I was here for Bella in the physical sense, I kept the roof over our heads and food on our table, but I had done nothing to be a proper guardian to her beyond that.
Perhaps she was right to hate me. I sure hated me, that's why I drink, it helps me to forget just how much I hate myself for the disappointment I have become. Alcohol and meaningless coupling were the only things that helped me forget just how broken I was. I didn't want to be broken, but I saw no way to move beyond this version of myself.
I pulled myself out of the floor stretching my limbs to relieve the ache of sleeping in such an awkward place. Despite to pounding in my skull I shook my head to push away the train of thought I had found myself in. I realized then that I had passed out in front of the door to father's room.
At that realization I bolted down the hall and towards the stairs as I made my way to the kitchen to find something to help with my aching head and to run from the memories which that room brought to mind.
Upon entering the kitchen, I was shocked to see no signs of coffee or any form of breakfast. Even when Bella was avoiding me in anger, she still would leave out extra of whatever she had eaten for breakfast so that I could eat too. She was far too kind to me, I knew it, but I couldn't seem to bring down the walls that I had surrounded myself with, even for my sister who deserved far better than me.
After scrounging up something to eat and making myself a sad cup of coffee I made my way back upstairs after checking the rooms downstairs for any signs of my sister. I knocked on her door, but after hearing nothing I chanced a peek inside, it was very unlike her to be sleeping so late into the morning, but she wasn't there either.
I began to get worried, just because my behavior was often horrid, I still cared deeply for my sister, even though I was horrid at showing it. I began making my way through our house once more, ignoring the persistent ache in my head, and began calling out to Bella in hopes of her hearing me and making herself known to me.
I had searched every room in the house and had finally decided to check outside to see if she had wandered out to gather eggs or feed the horses. I threw open the back door with more force than intended and it banged against the neighboring wall with a resounding thud.
Snow… there was snow as far as the eye could see, and what's more there were no footprints disturbing it. The ache in my head once more made itself known I started getting flashes of memories of last night.
Flashback
I moved forward; I could see that this time she was truly afraid of me. I was just trying to talk to her, that's what I told myself. I reached out and grabbed her arm.
"Now Bella, why do you run from me? Do you wish to hide… from me… your brother?" I asked as I tightened my grip on her arm. I was beyond frustrated, she had no reason to run from me, I WAS HER BROTHER.
She turned to look at me, good, she was going to listen. Before I could say anything more, she spit in my face. I was so shocked that I lost my hold on her arm. As I was clearing her spit from my eyes I was knocked back by a kick to my gut. She had kicked me!
"You are NOT my brother!" She wailed "You are a hopeless drunk! My brother disappeared three years ago!" That one hurt, had I truly changed that much?
"He never kept strange company, and he certainly never approached me in the manner that you just did!"
What? How had I approached her to make her shout at me in such a way? My mind was reeling, she had seen me as a monster, had I looked as such in her eyes?
She ran down the hall and with my thoughts still going wild I made after her, hoping to be able to get her to stop and see reason, I wanted to explain, but even I knew that I was too drunk to do so. By the time I had caught up to her she was already running out of the house. I wanted to go after her, but I was too intoxicated, and I knew that I wouldn't make it far. Instead, I leaned against the frame of the door with one hand still rubbing my stomach where she had kicked me. And from the distance I heard her shout.
"If you ever see my Emmett again tell him I am sorry, for I do not expect I shall ever come back!"
End Flashback
NO!
I fell to my knees in the open doorway. The cold air flowing freely into the house. I was being chilled to the bone, but I couldn't find it in me to care.
She was gone… she had run, and I had been the reason. I had officially broken my promise. Not only to father, but to myself, and to Bella.
I had to make it right! I had to find her and explain, and I had to bring her home!
A/N: Hello there! I hope you liked this introduction to Emmett's perspective. Back when I first was writing this story, I had wanted to make Emmett more of an antagonist and give him a bigger redemption arch, but I just couldn't write him to be such a monster. He will still have to earn back Bella's trust, and his road will not be an easy one, but I wanted to make her run away a wakeup call for him. I didn't want to focus on the darkest part of his story.
I have been thoroughly enjoying writing thus far, and I am so excited to really get into the story now that the beginning storyline is fully caught up from all sides.
~Rylandra
