Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans.
And So It Is
Chapter 17
I hate this fucking hospital. I've been here since almost 9:30 this morning and its going on 7 in the evening. I've been here for fucking hours. It is horrible to be induced. I haven't even started cramping nor has my water broke. Every three hours or so a nurse comes in, sticks her fingers up my vagina to feel my cervix to see if I'm opening at all, and if not... they send in another nurse to do the exact same thing, but instead of feeling me up... she sticks another cervix softening pill up there.
But it gets worse... if the nurse has short fingers... which it seems almost all of them in the hospital do. They almost make me bleed by trying to shove them up there so far. Sometimes I wonder why they just dont stick there whole hand in there. Yes, it would be painful, but a baby is gonna pop outta there soon anyways.
So then I'm walking the hallways, trying to help induce contractions and possible get my water to break. Yes, they want you to walk a lot right before you pop, because it helps relaxes muscles or some bullshit theory of theirs. On top of that.. they won't feed me and all I can have is ice chips. I guess they don't want me peeing on the baby or something. I don't know, nor do I care. I would kill for a fucking brownie right now.
The hospital is so damn bland. The walls are this off-white.. almost eggshell color. They have these borders traveling along the top of the hallways with little pink and blue baby feet. I see all these other pregnant women bouncing around getting ready to give birth. The worst is when the recognize me, their first response is for my autograph, the second is they ask where Richard is. Yes, most of these women are married and they still wanna fuck Richard. It's disgusting really.
So now I'm making my way back to the drab, mauve colored room where I will be giving birth. Rachel is sitting in a chair, talking quietly on the phone. I swear to god if she is on the phone with Richard I am going to beat her fucking ass. Normally I am not so irritable, but I am starving. To make things worse, Garfield is sitting in the corner chowing down on a double double from In-n-Out. My god, I want to stab him in the eye with a needle or something.
I rub my face and lay back on the bed. I'm exhausted and all I want is to get this child out of me. I'm at the end of my rope. I want my baby and I want everyone else to go away. The nurse is coming. I can hear the clack of her ugly ass shoes on the floor coming down the hall. She is one of the sluttiest women ever. I have no idea why she is even working in this department. She could meet way more men somewhere else. She's kind of tall, rather slim... total implants, with bleach blonde hair and bright blue eyes. I could almost say she was pretty if it wasn't for all the make-up. But I guess some guys like the whole 'I'm a total whore and I wear too much make-up, do you wanna fuck me in a closet' look. Her name was Daisy. Yes, daisy. The fucking girl scout beginner flower bullshit. All I can say is.. Daisy is a cow's name, not a person. If her parents were gonna name her after a flower, why not a better one.. like Rose or Lilly or Violet. My god, Daisy?
But I digress, the blonde bimbo is here now, asking me politely to lay on my hands and spread my legs. I can hear Raven tell Gar that he better keep his eyes off of my naughty parts or Richard will kill him. I sigh and blow my bangs out of my eyes. Who cares about Richard! I surely don't. He's a fucking prick that can rot in hell with all his other little whores and blah blah blah. I'm so emotionally drained from this whole ordeal.
"You are at a 3, honey. You will be having this baby tonight." Daisy says, smacking loudly on some bubblegum. I don't even know when she started chewing it, but it is giving me a massive headache.
"Really, Daisy? I'm going to be a grandmother!" My mother squeals in the corner like a fucking hog at a rodeo. I roll my eyes. Of course she is gonna be a fucking grandmother, I am pregnant. It's not like I can change that.
"So, where is Mr. Grayson?" Daisy tries to sound casual, but I know she's looking for a way to meet him, possibly fuck him. I glare at her.
"Who mentioned Grayson?" I asked suspiciously.
"Well, he is the father. Everyone knows. I just assumed you would want him here for the birth." Daisy said, pretending to check over my chart, "You guys are in love right? So romantic and he is so handsome."
I closed my eyes choosing to ignore the handsome/romantic remarks and just comment on what I know for sure, "I do not want him here. I doubt he wants to be here. He isn't coming."
"He is the father, he does have the right to know."
I didn't bother opening my eyes to respond to her, "If you so much as begin to call him.. I will have my lawyers on your ass so fast you will be looking for a new job by morning."
She didn't respond, so I assumed she left the room. I could hear my mother whispering to Raven, about what? I wasn't sure. I hoped she wasn't up to one of her little fucked up plans. She still had these big hopes and dreams for me. When Richard and I dated, she had wanted me to marry him so badly. My parents absolutely adored him and thought he was the most wonderful man in the world. They still do, especially since he's the one who knocked me up. They don't know all of the shit he's put me through. All of the shit we've put each other through. And even if they did, I doubt it would make a difference in their opinions. My mom thinks our children would be beautiful and always dotes on how polite and well mannered he is. And my dad, Richard talks business with him and they also drink brandy together in the study like we are trapped in the 17th fucking century. Speaking of my father, what a piece of work. He's in the waiting room, refusing to be in here with the rest of us because "it just isn't proper". Though I am not yet giving birth or anything, but that's his logic for you.
I opened my eyes when I felt another needle prick in my arm. Daisy was back, and hooking me up to an I.V. with the contraction inducing medication. I didn't look at her, or speak to her. I was too lost in my own thoughts. I had wanted this baby out of me so damn bad, and now that is was going to happen... tonight. I wasn't excited or restless anymore.
I was absolutely terrified.
I blinked back tears and held my breath, just praying to every god out there that his pain would pass soon. It was a little after midnight and My contractions were almost two minutes long and three minutes apart, but I was probably way over reacting because when you are in this much pain, you tend to blow things out of proportion. In other news, I was only dilated to a 5, which means I wasn't a full 10, which means the baby wasn't ready to come out yet. My cervix wasn't soft enough. Which means this hell that I am in has to last longer.
Another pain. I bit my lip hard, letting the copper taste of blood fill my mouth. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to push all the negative thoughts away. I was in so much pain and yet, I wanted Richard badly. I missed him, I needed him. I wanted him to hold me, tell me I was going to be okay.
I hated him for doing this to me.
Not getting me pregnant, but making me feel this way. Hating him and loving him at the same time. How could he do this to me! How could he just take me and make me love him and then abandon me. Only to return years later and make me fall in love all over again. I thought I was over him. I thought we were done. But no, he has to work his magic fingers... and other magic body parts.. and now I'm here in the hospital about to give birth to his child and he isn't even here. I do want him here, but there is no way in hell I'm going to tell anyone that. It's better if he doesn't know, I don't need things more complicated than they already are.
I take a rubber band from Rachel and put my hair up into some sloppy half-assed bun on my head, and brush my bangs from my sweaty forehead. I had no idea how I was going to survive this. I was in so much pain.. physically and mentally. On top of that... I was bringing a child, my son, into this horrible fucked up mess. Richard and I have one twisted ass relationship. Completely and utterly fucked to the core, and now we were going to bring a baby into the middle of it. Damn, we are so fucking fucked.
I close my eyes as another pain hits me. I can feel myself crying, but I don't try to wipe away the tears. What for? It isn't going to stop them from falling. I can hear my mom cooing over me, telling me it will be alright. I didn't brush her off for once. It's not the contractions that is making me cry, it's just... everything else. I have the world weighing down on my shoulders and I'm doing this all alone. I know I could say the word and he would be here, but I'm too damn stubborn to give in. I wonder what he will say when he finds out I had the baby without him here...
"So Kori, have you decided on a name?" Rachel asked, trying to relax me.
"Yes, but I'm not telling. It's a surprise until he's born." I grunted as my mother placed a cool washcloth on my forehead.
"But I mean last name," Rachel said quietly, "I mean is the baby going to be Anders? Grayson? Anders-Grayson?"
I barely opened my eyes, "I'm not as much of a bitch as you think. I would never deny him paternity of my son. Our son. His last name will be Grayson. Not Anders, and I hate the sound of Anders-Grayson."
"Yes, that would be weird. My last name Grayson, your last name Grayson, and our sons last name Anders-Grayson."
My narrowed eyes darted to the door where Richard was leaning against the frame. He looked disheveled like he rushed here, but casually cool at the same time. I turned to glare at Rachel and my mother. Rachel's eyes were downward, while my mother's were bright and cheery and seemed to have lit up when Richard arrived.
I turned my attention back to Richard, "What are you doing here?"
He smirked, "I came to see my wife give birth to our first born."
"I am not your wife." I groaned out.
"Yet. But believe me, you will be. You've loved me for years, been in love with me for as long as you remember and don't think I haven't returned those feelings. I've been in love with you since we were kids and I knew back then I would marry you and I still plan to."
His smugness was too much for me. It's the words that every girl longs to hear. Being loved by Richard Grayson. But of course, his delivery is all wrong. Making it sound like he won some sort of bet. I rolled my eyes, he was never good with expressing his feelings.
"Get out."
"No."
"I don't want you here."
"Don't lie to yourself."
"I'm not going to marry you."
"Yes, you are. If I have to, I will get a fucking priest in here now to marry us. You will be my wife and you have no say in that."
I glared at him, "Wow. Such words of love."
He grinned at my sarcastic tone, "I love how even while you are going through one of the most painful experiences imaginable, you still don't lose your edge."
"You'll never be faithful." I whispered.
"Give me a chance." He said quietly and grabbed my left hand. I didn't look at him, I couldn't. I was in love with a selfish, conceited, over-indulgent asshole... but I didn't want anyone else. I felt him slip something on my finger.. probably a ring, because what else can you slip on fingers? I looked down and my eyes widened. On my finger was a gorgeous 5 carat flawless, round brilliant cut diamond surrounded by smaller princess cut diamonds on a platinum band. It was breathtaking.
I looked into his eyes, "Don't fuck with me."
He smiled, "I'm not, I want you to marry me."
I shook my head and looked down. I could feel my eyes watering, "I'm not some fucking toy you can play with."
He stroked my cheek, "Look at me. I love you Korina Anders and I want you to marry me."
I felt a tear escape my eye and trail down my cheek. I bit my lip in contemplation and with the fact that the contractions were becoming harder. "How do I... How do I know you won't abandon me again? How do I know you won't continue to fuck half of Gotham?"
"Trust me." He said the words with such confidence, it made me almost want to believe him. Deep down we both knew the truth though.. he seriously can't help his philandering ways and I can't help, but be desperately in love with him.
I grabbed his collar and brought his face close to mine. In a sultry voice I whispered, "Get me a nurse. I need an epidural."
He blinked a few times, registering what I was saying and then shook his head smiling. He stood up and made his way towards the door and winked at me, before leaving to get a nurse. I blew out a sigh of relief and rubbed my eyes. So I guess I was going to marry the Richard Grayson...
my god, what have I done?
"I feel pressure." I mumbled in my exhausted state. They gave me an epidural and I was completely numb, the horrible contraction pains were gone and I just wanted to sleep. But there was the whole ordeal with a baby about to come out of me. Richard immediately jumped out of his seat, spilling some coffee on his shirt and rushed to get the nurse. I had no idea why he rushed, it's not like I was in pain now, but I suppose he is excited... it is his baby too.
"Spread your legs honey so I can check you." Daisy, the bitch nurse that barely has time to look at me because she is so busy making eyes at Richard, tells me. I complied, too exhausted to argue. I had to give Richard credit, since he's been here he hasn't made eyes at any of the numerous hospital staff that has come to parade themselves around him. In fact, at the moment I can here him arguing on his cell phone with Bruce about... nannies? I can hear him talking about the best ones and he doesn't care if they have to be flown out from England. Hah.. look at him, getting into protective daddy mode.
"Oh, I better get the doctor. You are crowning." My eyes instantly widened and I could feel my heart start beating faster. Oh my god, the moment of truth was here... the baby was ready. I saw Richard stare at me, then between my legs, then back at me and drop the phone. He immediately latched onto my hand and stared into my eyes.
"I know you're scared Kori, but it'll be okay. You can do this. I'm here for you, always." His words comforted me more than I thought they would. Doctor Morgan came in with her gloves and a face mask on. My legs were spread wider and two nurses came in to hold up my knees. Daisy came in also and put an oxygen mask on my face. It was supposed to help me, but was more of a hinderance than anything else. Richard held my hand tightly as the Doctor told me to push and count to ten.
It was insane really. Holding your breath and pushing while they counted to ten, when their version of ten was really like forty. I saw the doctor get ready to cut me open and I averted my eyes. Richard never took his eyes off my face and held my hand so tightly. I could feel the love radiating off of him in waves. It was a special moment, just for us and I was so unbelievably happy.
"Just one more push Kori." Doctor Morgan said and I complied, pushing with the last of my energy. I had no idea how women do this, I was completely numb to the pain and I was still exhausted just from pushing. Finally with a cry, he was brought out of me and laid on my stomach, covered with blood and small amounts of white stuff. The smell alone was nauseating, but I felt myself grinning at the terrified look on Richard's face when they gave him the scissors to cut the cord.
As soon as he cut it, they whisked the baby away to have him cleaned. Richard leaned down and kissed me softly on the lips, "You are amazing." I smiled at him, as I watched the Doctor sew me up. I was damn thankful she cut me, cause there was no way that baby's head was gonna fit out of there on it's own. I rolled over so the nurse could pull the epidural needle out of my back and almost immediately felt the pain come back. I was going to be so fucking sore for days. I laidd my head back against the pillow and felt a cool washcloth be placed on my forehead.
"We have a son." I heard Richard whisper, probably more to himself than me. I cracked an eye open and smiled at him. The nurse brought our son back to me, wrapped in a green and white blanket. She placed him in my arms and I gasped. Fuzzy black hair and piercing blue eyes.. a clone of Richard Grayson. I glanced at Richard and smiled at his show of obvious pride that the child looks like an exact replica of him. He gently rubbed the baby's head and smiled at me.
"Well I guess I have the dominant genes. It looks like all you did was carry him around for nine months, not really doing much else, eh?"
If I had the strength, I would have hit him. Instead, I glared at him as the nurses helped my part way out of the hospital gown so I could place the baby to my breast. He immediately latched on and started sucking for all he was worth. Although rather uncomfortable, it wasn't as painful as I first thought it would be.
"So, thought of a name?" Richard asked while playing with my hair and watching the baby eat. I locked eyes with him and nodded, "Yes, I think I have decided on a name for him." Richard just watched me and waited for a response.
I smiled, "Tristan Michael Grayson."
