Sakura: "What do you get when you mix seven deadly...or maybe not so deadly...sins, one pipsqueak, a handful of birdseed, and some state alchemists?"

Wrath: "Cake!"

Sakura: "No. You get...FULL METAL PANIC...oh I mean...FULL METAL ALCHEMIST OVERLOAD!"

Wrath: "Can I still have some cake?"

Sakura: "Sure, little one. Lets go find some cake while Envy types."

I DO NOT OWN FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST! If I did, I'd make Ed take his clothes off more often!

type type type


Two short...people...stood outside the Washington Monument on a cool, crisp, fall day.

"Ah yes, the sweet smell of muffins...", muttered Edward as he looked at the huge, tall...monument...in front of him.

"Mufiiiiinn?", Wrath squee'd with big watery eyes.

"Dammit Wrath you can't even spell when you're talking.", Edward said, slightly annoyed at the little monster's lack of grammers.

"Don't blame me! Envy's the one writing the story! Hey Envy if you're reading this, you spelt 'grammar' wrong!", yelled Wrath.

"Fine! I QUIT!"

"No Envy come back! He didn't mean it!"

-cough-

So, where were we? Oh yes, Ed and Wrath were standing in front of Dunkin Donuts...

"What! We were just in front of the Washington Monument!"

"Nope. It was all an illusion..."

"Whatever, just get on with the story..."

So here they we're in the kitchen of dunkin donuts, Envy had finally got a job after being fired from his job as a fanfic writer.

"Who wants do-nutsssssssss!" Envy sang gleefully as he pranced out of the donutz kitchen while holdinga plate of steaming, yummy, donuts.

"Fanx Enbea fogreh sheh donuckts.." Edward said through a donut-filled mouth. (Translation: Thanks Envy, for the donuts)

"Wrath like donuts!" Wrath added, apparently speaking in 3rd person...

Then the whole world...the whole 3 miles...turned black for a second..then...

"Greed turn the lights back on."

"Its not me!"

"Lust, lights, NOW!"

"Sloth?"

"zzzzz..."

"Damn you're lazy...forget it I'll turn the fricken lights back on.."

And then the giant lightbuld exploded, so there was like...5 minutes...with no sun, and then it came back on

"Whew..." saidPride "I couldn't see the mirror..."

"Hey Envy come look Greed's passed out on your bed!"

Envy thinks, with a puzzled expression, "I have a bed...?"

And now back to the donuts.

Vash the Stampede had...

Oh wait...wrong story...

Once again, back to the donuts...

Envy sat down on the couch and began flipping through the channels on the tv..

"Survivor...nope, Pride already told me the ending...Boxing...no...Samurai Champloo...no that Fuu girl is prettier than me..the stupid whore...Football...no, wait, do they even have that here in Japan?"

"We aren't in Japan."

"Then what's that dog-guy doing here?"

"Oh, InuYasha? He just crashes here sometimes when Kagome's been pissing him off."

Oh well, lets just say that the donuts exploded and Ed went to make out with Sakura and Wrath is busy throwing stuff into a river...and Envy's in a French Maid uniform, why not?

"Mmmng..."

"Shh someone will hear us.."

"But.."

Envy walks in on the two teenagers "Oh this is too good. Smile for the camera!"

"And that's how Envy got to be employee of the month at Dunkin Donuts", the manager said as he hung up two pictures on the wall, one of Envy in the French Maid uniform, and one of Sakura and Ed making out. Hormones...

"So, Lust, whaddya think?" Envy said with a sparkle in his eyes.

"About what?"

"My DRESS..." He said, as he spun in a circle with pink sparklies floating around him.

"Yeah I've been wondering, why are you wearing that? Is it your work uniform?" Lust pondered

"Gaspeh! No, I'm wearing it because I want to be pretty!"

"...Oh..." Lust said, and then walked off.

"Then, as Ed plowed into his hashbrowns, everyone gave thanks for IHOP.

"Question.", said Greed

"What?"

"Why are we in Ihop?"

"Cuz I said so."

"Oh."

"Hey, can we end this chapter soon? I'm tired.." said Envy with a yawn.

"Sure! Besides, we'll all need out rest for when we make...THE BEST CAKE EVER!"

o.o

And thats how Lust learned to change lightbulbs, Envy learned that the best way to become Employee of the Month at Dunkin Donuts is via blackmail and french maid dresses, and Wrath learned about the Washington Monument, and elevators.

"Wait, we're back at the Washington Monument now?"

"We never left...hehehe..."

"But, the sign says 'IHOP'..."

"Thats cuz we're in IHOP! Duh..."


Sakura: "So? How'd you like it? "

Wrath: "It was great! But, why was Envy wearing a dress?"

Sakura: "Because he's strange like that. And because I like to torture him by putting him in embarassing situations."

Envy: "But itdoes make meprettier, right?"

Sakura: "Yes...just go on thinking that."

-Ed holds up a sign- REVIEW PLEASE!