Chapter 10 – Confessions Part 2

Mel got up from the couch she had been sitting on and retrieved a bottle of water from the kitchen. "I have to confess something before you decide that you do want to be with me."

"Mel, I am sure that we have both been with other people. We both thought that we were divorced."

Mel looked down at the bottle in her hand and thought hard about what she was going to say. "It goes way deeper than just that. It goes to how I coped with losing our daughter."

"You don't need to tell me anything, Mel." Radek caught her eye and tried to project his understanding to her.

"Did you not notice how I went to get a bottle of water to drink after you had poured me wine?"

"Vaguely, but you always drink water with a meal," Radek replied, getting confused at her confrontational tone.

Mel realized she was getting angry with Radek for not reading her mind and guessing what she was trying to tell him.

"I'm sorry that I was getting a little angry with you. I thought maybe you would pick up on the signs or read my mind."

"Like I said, you do not need to tell me anything."

Mel looked up at Radek with tears shining in her eyes. "I handled losing Isabelle and you very badly. I was depressed for a very long time. And I drank heavily for a few years."

Radek's surprise showed on his face at this confession. "But you hated to drink when we were together."

"Because I knew of what my family's track record with alcohol was like. I had alcoholics on both sides of my family with the closest ones being my father and older brother. I knew that given the right circumstances, I had a very good chance at being one too. And losing Isabelle and then you leaving was more than enough to send me over the edge."

"I didn't mean to leave you, but I had that opportunity back in the Czech Republic to do some good work in my field."

"I'm not placing any blame on you for my problems, Rad. Do not for one minute think that you are guilty for my taking that first drink. It was my weakness in falling prey to a disease that had affected me in so many other ways."

"Does anyone on Atlantis know about this?" Radek was trying to keep a lid on his emotions.

Mel looked away briefly before answering. "Rodney knew me when I worked at Area 51. He knew about the depression and the drinking. He was actually the person who led my intervention."

Now Radek was surprised. "I didn't think Rodney got that close to anyone before he came here."

Mel smiled through her tears. "He was a good friend in a very dark time. He didn't have so great a childhood either, so I guess we both saw that in the other."

"Were you involved?" Radek wasn't sure if he wanted to hear the answer.

Mel almost choked on the water she was sipping. "Heavens, no! Kissing Rodney would be like kissing my brother or worse!"

Radek's smile was gleeful as he got up and moved from his couch to Mel's and sat beside her. "That is very good to hear. I would hate to lose you to Rodney McKay." He put his arm around her shoulders and hoped that she would lean on him.

Mel laid her head on Radek's shoulder and cuddled closer as he tightened his grip on her. "I am sorry if my grief drove you away. If it's any consolation, I've missed you all these years." She placed her left hand on his chest and felt his heart beat.

Radek moved slightly to kiss Mel's forehead. "I am sorry for not staying and working things out. The only thing I can say in my defense is that I was young and stupid."

They sat there on the couch, holding each other as the clock ticked away. Radek had threaded his left hand into Mel's short cap of hair before he spoke again. "Whatever happened to your ring?"

Mel lifted her head to look in his eyes. "It's in my things back on Atlantis. Where's yours?"

Radek smiled. "It's in my things back on Atlantis."

Mel laid her head back on Radek's shoulder. I missed this for too long. "So what are we going to do now?"

"Well, we should go to bed and get some rest." Radek was on the verge of laughing.

Mel lifted her head and lightly slapped her left hand on Radek's chest. "You know what I mean!"

Radek cupped Mel's face in his hands and kissed her lightly before answering. "Let us just take things one step at a time. Okay?"

A look of relief swept across her face. "I can do that. And why do you think you're going to get any sleep tonight?" She laughed as she pulled him up from the couch and towards the sleeping area.