Author: JazzyMcWier
Words: 345
Summary: Just a missing POV piece for No Man's Land. Obvious spoilers for that ep. Maybe some foreshadowing for McKay and Mrs. Miller. Some Angsty!Rodney that came just off the top of my head. I took it from the whole "My Fault" bit.
My fault. My fault. The entire Earth is gonna be destroyed, have the life sucked out of every person, all because of my idiotic fault. The SGC, Canada, everyone I know…well, knew anyway. Sam, Generals Landry and O'Neill, that brunette—the cute one, the cat-sitter—Jeannie…Oh, god. Jeannie.
Rodney convulsed, his eyes opening with panic. Ronon was still struggling, grunting and groaning while trying to break free he couldn't move. Even beyond the fact that he was tied inside a sticky Wraith cocoon, he couldn't move, his limbs stiff with the goo, the guilt, the damning pain of knowledge.
Knowledge. Sometimes being a genius isn't all it's cracked up to be. God, why am I so flippant? And why I am talking to myself, inside my head? It's like Cadman all over again. I'm going crazy, that's why. And why shouldn't I be, hmm? I mean, I'm being shipped off to my home planet where every living thing's going to be exterminated And Jeannie…I'll never be able to talk to her about this, never be able to ask her to forgive me—Everything I've done…
His face flashed with sweat, disgusting beads rolling across his forehead, mingling with the other beads coming from his now-closed eyes. They slipped down his chin, in his mouth, through his tightly-compressed lips, closed hard to try to keep himself from shaking. His lips opened and his stomach heaved. He was vomiting and crying, albeit silently, two things he hadn't done since he was a kid still at home, age eleven. The only difference was that his mother wasn't there to smooth his hair and rub his back and reassure him that life wasn't all that bad, that nothing too horrible was going to happen.
And now she's gonna die, too.
His body was still caught in the web, but he shook. He shook hard, rattling his mind, the one thought that everybody would die, be horribly murdered, because of him being the only thing keeping him from bringing himself together.
"Great, McKay. You couldn't at least keep it down?"
