Author's Inane Rant: Well, not much has happened since I updated… Except for the fact that in health class we were going to work on a worksheet and we had to finish the sentences (about how we like ourselves) and I refused to do it. You see, there were things like this: "When you look in the mirror, you think you're... (finish)" and other things that were making us tell our personal thoughts of ourselves. I refused to do it because, being the blunt smartass I usually am, I refused to exploit my personal thoughts on myself that could be used against me by my peers to be accused of insecurity. And I actually did say exactly that… Heh, the teachers probably didn't like me much before, but now I'm probably just annoying the crap out of them. Yay! My goal in life is finally completed, so I can now die without any regrets. I mean, not that I don't care about entertaining fans of my fiction (pun intended), but I don't actually see how my story is so good… As you can see, I am very negative about things; which doesn't help me with my social life.

But then again, I am quite happy with the few very close friends I have. Who can guess every smartass comment I will say and can successfully counter them. Ah, the bliss and insanity of friendship within insane groups of people. Anyway, quick review reply.

Pearl: Ah, it's all right. Actually, I only get mildly annoyed when people jump to conclusions; people jump to conclusions about me everyday, saying I'm a bitch, geek, etc. And it's all right, as long as you make up for it with more reviews! I mean, come on! I have 345 hits on this story with 5 chapters, but only 15 reviews. I shall sink into depression. Addicted you say:chibi Ban puts on Sherlock pose: The only way to treat this 'unfortunate' event is by… making you read more! Bwaha! And if I were to be a 'morph, I would be a… Sandslash 'morph! I love them.

I'll only now reply to reviews on chapters if they are unsigned. Also, I decided that since I don't like making up minor characters, if you submit one they will only be there for a short time; just to help the chapter along.

Anyway, if anyone ever gets the bright idea to wonder why I call myself Ban, as in the character in one of my stories, I'd like to let you know that it was actually based off the story. After reading the story for the first time, one of my friends decided to start calling me by the main character's name. I actually liked the name a bit, and after a while of people catching on and them calling me 'Ban' or 'Banira', I let it go and let myself be called that.

Meet the Thieves'… Torturers?

I burst out laughing. It was all I could do; that dumbstruck look on his face was enough to make a mute Magikarp laugh! He recovered slightly when I had just started rolling on the ground, clutching a stitch in my side.

He looked offended at that, and (probably for the sake of 'manly dignity') pulled a pokeball out of one of his pockets. He tossed it onto the ground and in a flash of red light, another Zigzagoon appeared. This one looked tougher and less bubbly than most of the raccoon pokemon, and I only had time to stop laughing and wonder why before he issued his challenge.

"If I win a one-on-one battle, you never saw me!" I jumped up to my feet, searching for any kind of hint of a trick. Seeing nothing but an offended boy, I threw out Wish.

I had wanted to try her out in a real battle for a while, she seemed much more powerful than Murry. Murry was… well, cute. I thought of using him for a contest; something like a beauty show but you could choose categories of what kind of things your pokemon are good at. A Cute contest would be best for him, no matter what his move set was. But, he was still pretty good at battling too and publicity may not be a good thing for me.

I nodded to the 'morph, challenge in my eyes. Not that I could see my eyes, of course. I don't think I even remember what eye color my old thief friends said I had; I'd have to check soon to soothe my curiosity… Before I could let my thoughts wander too much, I shook my head slightly to clear my thoughts and looked at Wish.

She was only a little tired from earlier, I thought she was stronger than Bubbler and Murry. Probably by a few levels, and I sent her out because she had pretty good endurance. I knew that Bubbler might have been a choice of someone who always went for the 'match fire with fire, speed for speed' but I didn't want to. I knew that if the Zigzagoon was stronger than Bubbler, he would be speedier also. Bubbler had good speed but poor endurance, and if anything, Wish would be a much better choice.

The 'morph started calling out things to his Zigzagoon; which I couldn't understand. I could have sworn he was saying something like "Zig, zigzagoon!" but it could have been my imagination. Wish looked at me with questioning eyes, and I just shrugged. I couldn't really be expected to win this battle if, for one, I couldn't understand the other trainer, and two, my understanding of my pokemon and their battle skills were limited.

As much as I wished it, I couldn't ever be one of those people who always knew what to do next and always came out the better. Nodding to Wish, I decided to let her take up the battle, trusting her skills as a wild pokemon to know what to do. I knew I couldn't hide behind this much longer if I planned on getting better, but I would have liked it better if I actually had a real live teacher for this kind of stuff.

The Zigzagoon advanced on Wish, feinting an attack and then sliding around her to use a sand attack. Wish huddled up, expecting the attack from hearing the trainer's orders. But that wasn't the only thing the raccoon had in mind; he dashed through his sand attack to tackle Wish, knocking her over.

Wish started using uproar, a series of ear-piercing yells and screeches. The Zigzagoon folded his ears down and huddled his head under his paws. I just put a finger in each of my ears and started humming slightly to drown out the sound. Looking at the pokemorph, I saw that he was pushing his hands against his ears, his face screwed up in pain.

I realized that by being a pokemorph, he had much better hearing than humans and some attacks from pokemon affected him in ways it could only affect a pokemon. While the uproar was just really loud and unpleasant to me; it actually hurt them. I almost called out to Wish to stop, but then realized that it might cost me the battle.

Instead, I called out for a quick howl and then pound for after she finished the uproar. After finishing the attack, she complied with my orders while our opponents were still recovering. With another ear-piercing shriek that was more like a howl this time, she charged at the Zigzagoon and started pounding it with her chubby little paws.

While she was doing that, I was looking at her paws, wondering why she could actually hold things when she didn't have any fingers or thumbs. Lost in my train of thought, I didn't notice that the Zigzagoon had whipped his tail around at Wish after a few beatings and then started tackling her.

Hearing Wish's scream, I snapped out of my thoughts and looked at the situation in hand. Wish was a few yards away from Zigzagoon looking extremely beat up; the Zigzagoon was looking only a little better than she was. With lightning speed, he used a quick attack on her, dashing up in a blur and knocking her back a few more yards.

Wish struggled to get up, and I knew she was on her last ounce of strength. Taking out her pokeball, she yelled out in protest and started another uproar. I dropped her pokeball to cover my ears, and apparently that was all my opponents could take. The 'morph took out his Zigzagoon's pokeball and returned him, trying to be fast because he had to take one hand away from his ears.

Wish immediately stopped her uproar, seeing that we won the battle. I picked up her dropped pokeball and returned her, mentally thanking her and making a note to give her a treat later. The 'morph starting walking over to me as I put her pokeball back onto it's place on my pack's straps; I shuffled back a bit inadvertently, and he saw it.

He stopped right there, a few feet away from me. He held out his hand and I shook it cautiously. I didn't know if I could trust this guy or not, but he didn't seem like a hostile pokemorph to me. I couldn't myself not to make a joke.

"I guess I saw you then, eh?"

He laughed a bit and then answered. "Well, I was hoping that I'd win so I wouldn't have to follow you around and make sure that you wouldn't tell anyone. But I guess I have to follow you now!"

I stared at him, hoping he didn't just say that. If I were to become a normal trainer, I couldn't have a 'morph following me around! And come on, how was he supposed to disguise himself when I had to go into cities and towns? I voiced my complaints, hoping the 'morph would just leave now. The answer wasn't verbal though.

He dropped my hand and in a small flash of white light, a Zigzagoon was what stood in his place. I blinked at him and then realized that that was a power all 'morphs had. They could change into their pokemon counterparts at any time they choose at will. What surprised me more was that he started talking.

"Okay, girl, you need to heal your Whismur! By the way, it was pretty strong."

Offended by what he said, I couldn't help correcting it. "My name is Ayshen, not girl, and my Whismur is Wish who is female! And I don't see you introducing yourself!"

I then noticed that the Zigzagoon that wasn't in the battle was following us also. He was walking right by his trainer, but you could tell the difference because the 'real' Zigzagoon was smaller. He looked up at my stare and winked at me.

"Well, the one you first saw is Zag, Zig battled you, and I'm Zach Ziggert!"

I blinked and started laughing. Zag, Zig, and Zach Ziggert! I wondered if they did that on purpose for amusement. Looking at the Zag and Zach below me, I noticed that they had amusement plain in their eyes and took it that it was on purpose.

When I stopped laughing, he continued. "You didn't tell me the names of your other pokemon either. And I would like to know what you were doing out here, where you're headed, and what you plan on doing. Basically, I'm going to follow you until I deem you trustworthy."

I mentally laughed at that. A thief, trustworthy? Hah, the prospect was so absurd I was almost tempted to tell him the truth. But if I told him I was a thief, he could probably do something to me.

"Well, Bubbler is the Surskit and Murry is the other Whismur. I was training, I'm headed to Rustboro if you can't see that, and I'm going to go for the badge there when I feel my friends are ready."

He nodded, but the look he gave me made me continue. I decided that if I told him later he would think that I was leading him on and if I told him now there was a good chance that he would try to help me out. Basically, if telling him got him off my tail, good, if not, I could use battle practice with him and his Zigzagoons.

"Well, if you really want to know all about me, then you have to know first that I'm an orphan. I was abandoned when I was five or so and I was raised by some street gangs. A few days ago, I was trying to steal something." I paused and looked at him. He looked very interested yet guarded in his raccoon form. I continued.

"I had never had a pokemon before, and never wanted one. I was stealing this guy's wallet and he caught me. After a big chase, he caught up to me and I learned that there was actually a pokeball in the wallet containing one of his pokemon. I gave it back to him and ran away. I went back to my 'home', which happened to be a loft in a rotten warehouse, and I found out that I had a pokeball in my sleeve. My Surskit was in it, and he decided to help me become an honest trainer so I wouldn't have to steal anymore. Basically, a few days ago I was given a pokeball by a stranger and I turned into a trainer, where after I had collected the two Whismur I have now. I signed up for my trainers' card and got it using a false last name, and here I am now."

That was basically everything summed up that had happened in the past few days. I wondered what the 'morph would do, before realizing that he was staring at me. Looking down, I noticed that he seemed to have this odd look in his eye; as if he had already known… Huh, just my imagination.

"Well then Ms. Thief, we're going to have to teach you quite a bit," was all he said before he ran off towards Rustboro; me panting behind.


Sorry it's a little late. I kind of got caught up in other things. By the way, people who don't review... No cookies for you! Or ice cream. Or chocolate. Nothing!