Standard disclaimers applied. See Prologue for further details.
Author's Note: Some of you may recognize the occasional reference to my other story, "By Correspondence." No worries though, you don't need to have read that one to understand this.
Chapter 24: The Enduring Power of Love
The year had brought many tidings and many blessings. For the Barnetts, the time passed had been a blur. Liked many expecting parents, they had been experiencing the ups and downs of their first pregnancy. Amniocentesis, genetic screening, ultrasounds and doctor checkups were kept up to date. Neela had taken on a lighter workload in the ER, mostly admission duties with Jerry or the occasional suturing that was done with Ray being in the next exam room. She was slightly smothered by the attention, although she gradually accepted to be the new norm.
She wasn't the only one expecting though. Abby was also pregnant with her first with Luka, the two had decided to elope once and for all. The ER was buzzing with jokes that perhaps, there was something in the water at County.
It was just like any typical afternoon when the two women were browsing for maternity clothes, even though, Abby was hardly showing. All of a sudden, Neela was seized with uncontrolled cramping. Grimacing with pain and uneven breaths, the Indian doctor could barely blurt out the words, "I think... it's ... contractions."
One frantic phone call later, it was answered by none other than Tony Gates and Zadro White. All joking aside, a call was put through to County "32 year old age primigravida (1), complains of sharp, consistent abdominal pains ..."
Within less than hour, a diagnosis was made, she had a miscarriage. There were no warning signs, no prior family history of birthing problems, but still, she had lost the baby. Ray was called away from the case that he had been working to answer a frantic page. Abby's face offered sympathy, "Go to her, Ray. She needs you now."
It seemed as though fate had been playing a cruel joke on them. Neela blamed herself, and was halfway convinced that Ray would be mad and leave her. On the other hand, Ray felt that he should have been there to take care of Neela, rather than working at the time.
They were passionate people and they cared deeply. For a time, they took no comfort in each other's presence. Neela was staring at the opposite wall, while Ray was not making any progress by looking at Neela's back. They could not bring themselves to think about the fetus, that was considered medically, not viable (2).
News spread in the ER about the tragedy and every means were made to give their friends the privacy that they very much needed. Minutes melted into hours, hours eventually became a day. Neela was checked out and considered physically well. Grief was not so easily dismissed. She and Ray managed to pull themselves together to make some arrangements for the fetus, but that was all that she could do.
Parama came on the third day, but she and Neela resorted to a shouting match. The younger sister had unintentionally said, "Maybe, it wasn't meant to be. You and Ray are both healthy people. You can try again."
"How do you know that it wasn't meant to be? Why did it have to be mine? This pregnant could have been our first baby! You can't just come barging in here, and just write everything off. You haven't changed, Parama - always so perfect."
"I'm just trying to be helpful, Neela."
"I would hardly think that you are the person to understand, after having two children with your ex-husband."
The sisters resorted to a silent treatment. Parama was still teaching her belly dancing class for pregnant women, so she was hardly in the position to offer any more sympathetic advice. Likewise with Abby who was expecting herself, she tried to avoid the Barnetts due to the awkwardness and self-doubts.
It was Kerry Weaver who tried to bridge things together. She herself, suffered a miscarriage and was in the position to say that she understood some of the emotions that the Barnetts were feeling. "Take all the time that you need. Know that you have people who care about you and you have each other."
She suggested that they took a trip down to North Carolina. "Sometimes, it's good to get away from everything for awhile."
Ray and Neela agreed to this as they both could not go back to the apartment that was now furnished with a baby products, nursery furniture and new wallpaper that was put up for the pending birth. Cynthia Carter mourned the loss with them, but she opened her arms for the two grieving parents.
Neela steadfastly erected a shield around herself and Ray was reverting back to his former shell just after Jamie's death. The day was usually filled with forced small talks while little appetite was found at the table. Neela more often than not, found an excuse to escape first, then followed shortly by Ray himself.
However tonight, Cynthia stopped her son from getting up from the table, with these words, "Landon."
"Ma, I'm sorry."
"Landon, I know that it seems life has been especially unkind to you. You have suffered a great deal of death and suffering but there isn't one day that I'm not proud of you. I am thankful to call you my son and have Neela as my daughter-in-law."
"Ma. I'm tired."
"Before you abandon this wonderful life that you have, I think you should read this." She placed an object near his hand before excusing herself from the table. It was Jamie's book.
-o-o-
He found her near the docks, facing the waters. She turned to acknowledge his presence before returning to the scene before her.
"Neela."
He was met by silence, but he tried again. "Neela, come back to me."
"How can you stand by me, after all of this? How can your mother accept me into her home?
"Because we love you and it's not your fault."
"I was carrying that baby, Ray. I should have known that something was wrong."
"Then, I should have know as well because I am your husband."
Reaching out to clasp her trembling hands in his, he pulled her closer to him. Tears rolled down her cheeks and dampened his shirt, but he paid no mind to this. He leaned down to kiss her hair before murmuring the long-forgotten words that were written in Jamie's book,
Love
is patient and kind;
Love
is not jealous or boastful;
it
is not arrogant or rude.
Love
does not insist on its own way;
it
is not irritable or resentful;
it
does not rejoice at wrong,
but
rejoices in the right.
Love
bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all
things.
I Corinthians 13:4
These had been the very words that blessed the union of Jamie Sullivan and Landon Carter. They served as a pledge to everlasting love. It was seemingly appropriate in a time when faith seemed to waver and times were bleak. As Neela looked up into Ray's eyes, she could not doubt the sincerity in her words. She realized that he grieved for the lost just as deeply as she did, but it would not deter him from having a future with her. "Are you ready to begin again?" he asked.
"With you by my side, always."
End of Chapter 24
AN: Yes, this story is truly coming to an end. As much as I had hoped to continue further, I find that this to be an appropriate ending. As the cliche goes, all good things must come to an end. An EPILOGUE will follow after this, along with an extended author's note and additional explanations. Stay tune.
(1) primigravida - woman who is pregnant for the first time
(2) 'not viable' - about 22-24 weeks, the fetus is considered to be at the age of viability, meaning it can live outside the womb. Neela miscarried after 5 months (20 weeks).
