A/N: I promise, I'm working on it. It's just…this one takes a few to marinate, you know? When we last saw our heroes, we just got introduced to real life John Casey. How does real life John Casey differ from coma-dream? Let's all find out.
Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck
Last time on Chuck and Sarah
The door shut, and Casey studied Chuck for a moment. "Go ahead, say whatever you want, because I have a feeling that you really aren't good at holding things in."
"For a smart guy, you're a damn moron," Casey told Chuck.
"God I've missed you," Chuck blurted out. Casey looked utterly confused.
And now, back to our story.
"What the hell do you mean you missed me?" Casey asked, perplexed.
"I mean, I missed talking to people….them talking to me and being honest, not you particularly." Casey gave Chuck a look like he didn't believe Chuck. Chuck continued, hoping he could convince Casey. "When you're in the position I'm in, head of a company, and that sort of thing…very few are honest with you, they tell you what they think you want to hear."
Casey stood there a second processing what he had just heard. He had a thoughtful look on his face. "Is that why you work with your friends?" Chuck nodded. "That's smart. Good friends…they'll call you out on bullshit."
"They will," Chuck agreed. Chuck knew he probably should let it go, but he found he couldn't. He needed to know what Casey meant. "But can we circle back to something? I'm not saying you're wrong, but how do you know I'm a damn moron?"
Casey grunted a laugh, a sound Chuck had heard many times….and had also never heard before. "I've heard quite a bit about you from your sister," Casey began. "She talks about you constantly and how you stood up to your mother and father and did what you wanted to do in life instead of what they thought you should do."
"It's my life," Chuck said with a shrug.
"It is," Casey agreed. "But she also told me about how you withdrew from the dating scene after your breakup with Carina."
"I was trying to figure out who I am," Chuck replied. It was true, he had pulled away from the dating scene. It hadn't been that long, not like…not like five years…like in his dream.
"You're trying to figure out who you are?" Casey repeated. He grunted.
"That's the, 'you don't even believe that,' grunt," Chuck said before he could stop himself. Casey gave him a look. "Am I right?"
"You are," Casey said. "You don't know who you are?"
"I don't," Chuck said to Casey. "This whole thing…me thinking I was in love with her, but I wasn't…I don't know if I know what love is." He paused and then because he was who he was, he couldn't help himself. "And-and now…I was in the coma, or whatever…I had some weird dreams…they messed with my head."
Casey stood there for a moment, studying Chuck. "How do you feel about a wheelchair ride?" Chuck grinned.
}o{
"The oncology ward?" Chuck asked Casey as they headed down the hallway. Chuck had been to the hospital many times to see his sister, and had been down these hallways before.
"Just can it, Bartowski," Casey grumbled. Chuck didn't know why that made him feel better, but it did. He was so confused about so much. As they went through the door, Chuck's heart lurched. He wasn't sure if he wanted to see familiar faces or not. Seeing them meant they still had cancer. Not seeing them…well, they were either in remission…or…."Hey, kids, we've got someone pretty special here."
"Has he got cancer?" One boy yelled out. "He doesn't have hair, like me."
"No, he had an injury and they had to operate on his brain," Casey told him.
"They had to operate on mine," a soft voice said. Chuck spun and saw the young lady. "You look familiar."
"Kelly," Chuck said softly, remembering her when he and Ellie had visited the kids some time back. "You're a ballerina."
"No, I didn't get to dance," Kelly told him, shaking her head. "I got too sick." Her eyes went wide. "MR. CHUCK!"
"Chuck?" Several of the kids said, recognizing him and getting excited.
"Okay, everyone, keep calm, you know what the nurses will do if I get you riled up," Casey told them.
"Look, Mr. Chuck, I got to be a basketball player," one of the boys told him. Everyone was turning on their gaming system, that was donated to the Oncology ward by Chuck.
"Twenty gaming systems, with the game My Life," Casey said softly. "The game that lets everyone be the person they only hoped they could be."
"They deserve the chance," Chuck replied just as softly watching the pride on the faces of the kids as they were showing Chuck their characters. "What's the big deal? I have the money, I created the game. I can't solve cancer, but I can give them the chance to be something else for a few minutes, and maybe give them some relief, you know?"
"You made their accounts free to play so they could do whatever they wanted," Casey reminded him. "You don't know who you are, Bartowski?" Chuck shook his head. "You're hope. You remind people of their best self. You give to others, and try and make their lives better, never expecting anything in return."
"Anyone in my position would do the same thing," Chuck said, shrugging.
"No they wouldn't," Casey disagreed. "Now, if you feel like it, some kids would like to show you the things they got to do, virtually, because of you."
"Yeah, I feel like it," Chuck replied. Casey nodded, grinning.
}o{
He was sitting outside, Casey on a bench, Chuck in his wheelchair, enjoying the sunlight. "I should get one of those aluminum foil things and work on my tan," Chcuk joked.
Casey grunted a laugh. There was silence between them, and then the big man spoke. "When I came back from the service," Casey began, a softer voice than he usually used, making Chuck turn to him. "I didn't know who I was…I didn't know what to do with myself." Chuck was silent, engrossed in the story. "I had been a 68 Whiskey, and while I needed to work…I didn't want to."
"Sixty-eight Whiskey?" Chuck asked.
"Combat medic," Casey explained.
"Oh, sorry," Chuck replied. "Please, continued."
Casey lifted his head and looked over the courtyard. "It wasn't our guys getting blown up over there that bothered me…I don't say that to sound cruel, but when we signed up, we knew the dangers, right? Of course it bothered me, but it didn't…bother me." Chuck nodded. "What really got to me, were the civilians, and it tore at me. We're supposed to be hard core in the military. We're supposed to treat people, but how do you treat someone when you feel broken?"
"I feel that's a rhetorical question and you're going to answer it," Chuck said softly.
Casey grunted a laugh. "You're a moron, Bartowski, but you're all right." Casey shook his head. "I had to heal my heart first."
"Kathleen," Chuck said softly.
"My step-mom?" Casey asked, stupefied by that reply. "Next thing you know you'll be telling me that I needed to help her with Alex." Chuck's eyes widened. Casey shook his head and sighed. "My dad remarried a younger woman after mom died, and they were both stunned when they got pregnant. Kathleen wanted to name her after her father, so now I have my dad Alex, and my step-sister, Alex…well, I did. Dad died a few years back."
"I'm sorry," Chuck said.
"Don't be," Casey replied. "He had a good life, and Alex, my step-sister, reminds me so much of him. I'm protective of her…it's like she's my own kid…hell, she's not much older than you. I figured you knew her."
"She's not by chance dating….." Chuck couldn't bring himself to say it.
"Yeah, your bearded buddy, Martin."
"Morgan," Chuck corrected, making Casey smile. "So what happened, obviously you became an EMT, but now you feel like you're close to burning out?"
"I met a woman…she helped fix me," Casey began. "Hell, she loved me. When I didn't think she could, or deserved it, she loved me."
"Casey…what happened over there?"
Casey was silent for a moment. "There was a building that collapsed…." Casey looked away. "You only have so much training, you know? I tried to keep the kid alive…" He shook his head and turned back to Chuck. "Wasn't much younger than you."
"I'm sorry."
"Yeah, me too, Casey grumbled. "I came back, and realized the only training I had was in a field that was going to lead me to watch more people die, and I couldn't do it." Casey was silent for a moment. "And then…then I took a buddy to meet his physical therapist, and holy shit if I didn't go and fall in love. My whole life I heard about love at first sight and all that horseshit, but when I met her…." Chuck didn't know if he had ever seen Casey smile like this in his entire dream. "She was beautiful, but there was something…a connection…it called to me…" Casey snorted. "Damn lady feelings," he said, chuckling. "My buddy, Roan-"
"Roan Montgomery!?" Chuck yelled out, and then winced. One part from the feeling of rattling his stitches and the area that was healing, and one part from realizing that he was blurting out more of his dream.
"Yeah, you know him?" Casey asked. Chuck nodded, not sure what to say. "Anyway, Roan was relearning how to walk after losing his leg…." Casey shook his head. "Tough old bastard, but he shouldn't have been over there with us."
"Roan lost his leg?"
"Yeah, stepped on a mine," Casey replied. "He's lucky it wasn't more than his leg."
"Damn," Chuck muttered. "I'm sorry, you were telling me about a woman you met?" He didn't say Gertrude, but he was betting on it.
"Yeah, Gertrude Verbanski," Casey said. Chuck couldn't help but smile. "She was helping Roan, and had no idea she was helping me. "Roan used to tell me I had too many lady feelings all the time." Casey grinned. "Anyway, Gertrude…Gertrude helped me heal my heart. She reminded me that if I hadn't been doing the job I did, many more people could have lost their lives."
"I'm really glad you met her, Casey," Chuck said honestly. "But I don't understand the burnout part."
Casey chuckled. "Well, I'm going to propose soon, and I've been working my butt off to get some extra money…"
"So you literally have worked too much and are close to burnout because you overworked yourself?" Casey nodded. Chuck sighed.
"You okay, Bartowski?"
"Your talk helped, and it didn't…Some things are much clearer, and some…some make no damn sense," Chuck admitted.
"Give it time, Bartowski, you did have a brain injury."
"Trust me, I know."
}o{
"Morgan, will you please stop staring at me?"
Casey had taken Chuck back to his room, and after a little while, Chuck fell asleep. He awoke, but never opened his eyes, the feeling of Morgan's eyes burrowing in to him as he watched Chuck.
Chuck couldn't help but laugh as he felt the bearded man hug him. Chuck opened his eyes, and realized that Morgan was crying. "Hey, man, I'm okay."
"I know, I know," Morgan replied. "I'm just relieved, because if you hadn't woken up today, I was gonna shave my beard off."
"Why would you do that?" Chuck asked.
"I was desperate," Morgan answered. Chuck started to retort, but remember he had a brain injury and didn't want to put himself through a trip to Morganville. "I've talked to Molly," Morgan began.
"Oh, crap," Chuck muttered.
"No, no, not oh, crap, more of a oh, thank God, Morgan is here and understands," Morgan insisted.
"Morgan, I don't know if I can do this right now, brain injury?" He reminded Morgan, pointing at his head.
"Chuck, buddy…I'm going to give advice I never have in my life, you need to relax, and take it easy," Morgan told him. Chuck blinked. Morgan was right, he had never given that type of advice, ever.
"Wasn't expecting that," Chuck muttered.
"Neither was I," Morgan admitted, sitting down in the chair beside the bed. "You are confounding-"
"Pretty sure it's conflating, Buddy," Chuck said gently.
"Chuck, you've had a brain injury, it's confounding," Morgan insisted.
"Morgan, you're confounding, what I'm doing is conflating," Chuck explained.
Morgan rolled his eye and pulled out his phone. He typed for a minute, looked up at Chuck, typed again, said, "huh," and put his phone back in his pocket.
"So I was right," Chuck told him.
"No, we both were," Morgan disagreed. "You are mixing up something with something else so that the individual elements become difficult to distinguish." Chuck narrowed his eyes. "You're trying to make both your dream Sarah and real Sarah…who let's be honest, is somewhat of a dream…" Morgan trailed off.
"Focus, buddy," Chuck said gently.
"Right," Morgan said, sitting up and shaking his head. "You're trying to make them into one person to make it make sense in your mind."
"I know that," Chuck told him.
"Okay," Morgan said leaning back, proud of himself.
"That doesn't help," Chuck said, exasperated.
"Chuck, give this time, she's not that Sarah Walker," Morgan explained patiently.
"I know that," Chuck replied.
"Ohhhh," Morgan said, nodding. He sat there a second, and stood. "This one you gotta figure out on your own."
"Okey-dokey," Chuck replied, not sure that he could handle any more Morgan logic.
"You're gonna understand soon enough, but until then, just chill, recover, get to know Dr. Sarah Walker." Morgan headed to the door and paused. "And please, she doesn't know you like the rest of us, only hit her with fifty or fifty-five percent of your charm."
"Morgan, have you considered she may not even like me, or that I may not like her in that way?"
Morgan laughed. "Good one, buddy, glad to see your sense of humor is back." With that he left. Chuck shook his head and closed his eyes, exhausted. Sleep took him.
}o{
"Chuck," he heard her say. He opened his eyes and saw sunlight streaming in. Sarah was standing there, smiling. "Hey, we need to talk."
"Don't freak out," he muttered to himself.
A/N: I know some people dislike Morgan, but no one, and I mean NO ONE undertstands Chuck Bartowski like Morgan Grimes. Now some of you saw my post about me writing serious Chuck and Sarah and it didn't work out. What does that mean?
Next time:
"Oh, a form of taco sauce," Chuck told her. "But you have to make sure it's not too hot, because some people can't stand the heat."
"No, some people can't," Sarah agreed, not sure when she had enjoyed herself more. "But you do need some heat, or…it's just not worth it, right?"
"Oh, absolutely," Chuck agreed. "You have to find that oh so perfect, yet tiny window in which you are both sweating just a little bit, but at the same time enjoying what is happening, all while waiting anxiously for what's next."
*squints at screen* Is he talking about food or….nah, couldn't be this early….could he?
