Two important updates. First, for my birthday last weekend, my fiancée commissioned art from Quimser, who had previously made the Meili in the Mist fanart. It's absolutely incredible, and I made it the cover art for this fic.
r/Re_Zero/comments/o99uoc/oc_restart_fic_art/
Second, I've fixed my biggest regret with this story and revealed something earlier. Previously, it had tons of hints, but nothing blatant. Now, it's extremely obvious, and the other hints will be modified somewhat. To find out, you can either go towards the end of Chapter 28 (before Beatrice comes in) or wait until it's revealed again at the end of this arc. This is not a lore change—it simply reveals a twist when it should have been revealed. However, it's incredibly important to the story, so I'd recommend taking a look.
Special thanks to my fiancée for cutting into her free time to meticulously go through and find errors, where they are then pointed out and corrected. In other words, thanks for editing this fic.
The Witches of Sin, Part 2
Subaru often thought about love.
Not the world's love, of course, but the emotion. His lack of it had defined much of his life. Even the few people he had contact with had merely pitied the poor, homeless orphan. The librarian was nice and all, but it wasn't like she held any love for him; he was a charity case and nothing more.
The first time that he had felt love was when he put a gun to his head and shot himself.
For just a single, fleeting moment, he could have sworn that someone was watching over him. As his brains scattered across a dusty alleyway and the Od Laguna took his soul, he felt truly appreciated. Someone cared for him. Someone loved him, even though he couldn't fathom who would.
"But it didn't really matter." The pain of that dark void overshadowed anything positive he may have felt.
And then…Satella saved his life.
She had sat by his bedside and held his hand to stave off the nightmares. When he'd writhe in pain, she'd whisper in his ear, saying that she would take care of him. When he had lost faith in humanity, a half-elf came and taught him what it meant to love.
In return, he was a coward, letting her be tortured for the sake of a madwoman. He should have stood his ground and demanded that she leave…but he didn't. He had been complicit in Echidna's crime, and his victim was the one he loved most.
"Never again," he vowed. "It's not even a debate at this point. I'm sorry, but Satella comes first."
Years ago, he had prioritized Satella over Beatrice, despite the fact that his then-girlfriend was like a mother to the little spirit. He hadn't had to choose between Shaula and Satella, but he knew he would choose the latter. As for Daphne…
"Well, I'm a bit too far in to question my resolve, aren't I?"
"Th'fuck're ya talking about, little fish?
Subaru raised his head and looked around him. He was standing on the outskirts of a town near the Vollachian border with Reid Astrea. "All we have to do is take out Carmilla's bodyguards before killing her."
Reid gave him a concerned look. "Yer doin' it again, little fish."
Subaru didn't respond, choosing instead to look towards the horizon. They only had five days left before Satella's soul was gone forever. Luckily, it seemed like he was about to get his fifth Witch Factor. "There's still a chance to save her."
Reid appeared in front of him and shook his shoulders. "All right, tha's enough! Snap outta it, ya prick! Ya haven't stopped talkin' t'yerself fer days, yer mood changes faster than a bird's on 'er period, an' I'm gettin' real wor—sick've this shit! Wha' th'fuck even happened t'get ya like this?!"
Subaru's eyes slid over Reid. "Don't worry," he said, but not to the swordsman. "I'll be gone soon. Sinners must always be punished for their crimes."
Subaru pushed away from Reid, and his gaze locked onto the town in front of him. "Carmilla's in there," he mumbled. "Do you think she'll understand? Sorry…I'm really, really sorry…It's for love…It's always been for love…"
Satella adored Typhon, and to know that Subaru had killed the young girl would "destroy her. She'll hate me." Could she move on, knowing her family was destroyed? Could she live with herself, knowing she had married the man who ruined her life?
He couldn't think about that. He needed to save her, then he would finally end it all.
Subaru held his head high and marched forward, an unnerved Reid following close behind.
"There's over a dozen of them," Subaru muttered. "Just gotta cut their connection, and they're free…"
Reid placed his hand on the pommel of his sword, relaxing a bit as he did so. "Aight, ya gotta tell me this shit again. Wha' exactly am I cuttin'?"
A direct question with a specific answer. Subaru latched onto that like a lifeline. "The Authority of Lust, Faceless Bride. Carmilla appears as whatever you need to see most at that moment in time. This could be a friend, a family member, or a love interest. She uses that to lure people in, in which case you stop breathing, and your heart stops beating. She takes the saying 'if looks could kill' literally."
Reid narrowed his eyes. "Tha' don't make sense, ya prick. If th'Witch is such a hottie tha' people die, how're these cunts able t'stick around her?"
"Because some people have a resistance to certain Authorities," Subaru explained. "In all likelihood, these are probably a bunch of mentally strong guys with no interest in romance or physicality."
"Then there ain't nothin' t'cut."
Subaru's blood ran cold, and he stopped in his tracks. "What did you just say?"
Reid rolled his eyes. "Yer dumb as shit, even fer a little fish. If they ain't affected by th'hottie, I can't cut them bein' affected by th'hottie."
"…Shit."
Subaru wanted to kill himself right then and there. Had he he always been this stupid, or had he just gotten dumber in recent years? Wasn't he supposed to be a man and stand up for himself, proclaiming that he was the one who was right? Was that a lie? Did Reid lie? "Was I wrong to take this path? Was Satella right? Should I have given up? No, I shouldn't have, I'm already too far gone, but—"
Pain exploded in the side of his temple, and he was knocked to the ground with a grunt. Reid stood above him with an angry expression, shaking his clenched fists. His windswept hair formed a menacing shadow over his face.
"Listen up, ya twat. I'm gettin' kinda sick o' babysittin' ya. Ya talk t'yerself, get all nervous an' shit, an' ya make all yer dumb plans by yerself. Sure, ya don't gotta give all tha' responsibility t'some other prick, but at least talk t'yer partners 'bout 'em 'fore goin' into a fucking warzone! Now, ya fucked it all up, little fish. Lemme break it down fer ya, 'cause it's obvious tha' yer too fuckin' insane t'think right.
"We're in th'middle o' bumfuck nowhere, an' we're 'bout t'fight a Witch an' 'er army without a plan. We can't make 'em run off, an' they're all surroundin' her, so they gotta be dealt with. Trisha ain't gonna be happy if I attack some random prick unprovoked, meanin' you gotta do it.
"Yer an indecisive prick tha' freaks out over killin' a Witch: a fuckin' monster. D'ya really think ya can kill these pricks…or are ya jus' wastin' our time?"
Subaru had a very clear answer to that question.
"Al Minya!"
Faster than the eye could see, Reid pulled out his chopsticks and split the magic in half. "See, ya already tried tha' one, an' ya—"
Lightning struck the earth in front of him, so he reflexively jumped back…directly into the path of another lightning bolt. He shook it off, but a barrage of shadow spears and icicles surrounded him from all directions. Within a couple of seconds, he quickly cut each of them, despite them numbering four-hundred and twenty-eight in total.
But there was one thing he didn't cut in time.
The Sage knocked Reid to the ground and placed his knee on the swordsman's throat. Hundreds of flaming spears made of crystalized shadow hovered over every inch of Reid's skin—even with his incredible power, being touched by an arrow of stagnant time would permanently damage him.
All of them at once? Reid Astrea would be wiped from existence.
Subaru's eyes smoldered with fury. Pressing down harder on Reid's throat, he spat, "Don't you ever question my resolve. I will happily kill some random soldiers to get to that Witch."
Reid said nothing as his face slowly turned blue. His limbs were pinned by earth magic. His chopsticks had been tossed out of his hand upon impact. He couldn't reach his sword.
Reid was at the mercy of a deranged, insane man.
"Don't you see? These people are nothing to me! To even pretend that they could be of significance is laughable! I'll kill them with ease! I've killed people before, so what's a few more? Haha, hahaha! It's funny as fuck, isn't it?! The other day, I murdered a child, yet you're asking if a battle-hardened soldier is too much for me?! It's crazy! Insane! Delusional! You're absolutely nuts, Reid! Hahaha! What a deranged freak! We really are alike, huh? When this is all done, maybe we should both kill ourselves! Oh, but not like a suicide pact, don't worry. That's a bit too morbid, don't you think? It's more like…a group activity! Yeah! Gotta get some team-building exercises in when you're done committing war crimes, you know? Shit, this is funny as hell! You should be a comedian! I mean, did you hear yourself? You asked if I could kill these guys! Man, you sounded hilarious! You're literally asking a child murderer what his boundaries are! You're bonkers! This is the kinda shit that's so stupid, it's cut from a novel, yet you asked me, the Sage, if I was okay with killing people!Do you realize how absurd that is? Do you…Wh-wha…"
…What…What was he doing?! His hands were tightening and…No! He couldn't kill Reid!
Subaru jerked his hands away as a bit of lucidity returned once more. "I-I'm sorry," he gasped out. "I-I didn't…Shit, I'm so—"
"Seems tha' nothin' changed, even after all this time."
The redhead brushed off Subaru's apologies with ease. He sat up on the ground, stretched his unbound legs, and massaged his bruised throat. He averted his eyes, ashamed, and mumbled something that Subaru couldn't quite hear—something about still being "weaker than tha' brat."
Suddenly, he shot to his feet with his trademark smirk. "Ah, but 'nuff o' tha' self-pity shit," he said flippantly. "Yer still a crazy asshole, even if yer a bit stronger than I thought."
Subaru averted his eyes. "Y-yeah, of course," he mumbled. "A-and…look, I'm so—"
"Save it," Reid said with a dismissive wave of his hand. He picked up his chopsticks from where they had fallen. "Sorry means ya know yer wrong an' tha' ya wanna change, but yer jus' gonna keep doin' th'same shit, aren't ya?"
Subaru couldn't deny it. He would follow through, no matter what.
He gave a long, drawn-out sigh. "Let's just get this over with," he muttered. "We're running out of time."
Subaru closed his eyes and gathered the surrounding mana into his body. He grit his teeth, clenched his fists, and whispered, "Ul Shamac."
A hurricane of shadows spread across the entire town, destroying the senses of everyone inside. Sight, sound, smell, taste, touch, and even pain ceased to exist.
Only Subaru held awareness.
"Wait here," he told Reid, but the swordsman couldn't hear him. "Oh…I probably should have told you about this part of the plan, huh? I guess I just figured that you'd cut the spell in half, or something. Then again, that would cut it for everyone, wouldn't it? I guess you'll be useless for a little while. Sorry, I'm rambling again, aren't I? I've been doing that a lot recently. Sorry."
He faced the shadows and steeled his nerves. He waded through the darkness until he felt about ten people in front of him. They were flailing about like headless chickens, unknowingly crashing into each other.
"It's for Satella," Subaru reminded himself. "That's a lie. I just don't want you in the way when Shamac wears off."
He averted his eyes, raised a shaky hand towards the silhouettes, and snapped his fingers. Their bodies burnt to a crisp, transforming from humans into ashes in milliseconds.
"Sorry about that, really. Better luck next life, I guess. Maybe don't hang out around Witches? Always seems to lead to misfortune. Ah, I'm being inconsiderate of your deaths, aren't I? My apologies, really."
He snapped his fingers once more, killing six more people. It was almost disgusting how easily the flame of life flickered out. It didn't matter if you were human, demihuman, or even a Witch; people were quite flammable…
…except for Typhon. He had stood right outside of her stone prison as she drowned, listening to her begging for help, for mercy.
It was muffled, but he could now hear the Witch Factor of Pride. It was undoubtedly telling him to kill himself.
"I will soon," he vowed, even as he murdered another one of Carmilla's bodyguards. "Don't worry, Typhon. I'll get my punishment soon."
For now, he had a mission to complete.
It was a blur, to say the least. He wanted to blame it on the shadows, but he knew that wasn't the case. The truth was that he was a murderer who couldn't take any accountability, just like that prisoner.
"Maybe someone should sacrifice me," he mused as he decapitated someone with a wind blade. "Actually, would that be disrespecting your last wishes? Or is it more fitting? Can it even be considered murder if I consent to it? Huh…Say, Typhon, how do you feel about euthanasia? Sorry, that was a strange thing to ask. I'll be sure to do something more traditional."
His ramblings continued for a few minutes, during which all of the bodyguards were methodically wiped out.
Twenty people. Subaru had killed twenty people who were just minding their own business.
His entire body felt like lead, and his thoughts slowed down once more. He collapsed onto a nearby bench with a heavy sigh. Was this who Satella was afraid of him becoming? Someone who would cruelly strip away life from the innocent? A monster who casually wondered what a child would think mere days after he had killed said child? A man whose only reaction was to sit down and sigh?
"I've always been capable of this, right, Typhon? You said it yourself. And Minerva, you hid the vessel from me. You knew I was a monster from the very beginning…meaning Satella did, too."
If Satella knew he was such a horrible person, then why did she marry him? Why did she love him? Was this some kind of Stockholm Syndrome? Was he just a self-inflicted punishment borne out of hatred for herself?
"That's not true," he shouted into the empty space before him. "Satella does love me! She always has!"
…But that love was conditional. She was going to leave him. He knew that she'd be sad—devastated, even—but not for his fall. She would mourn her daughter and hate her ex-husband. She would cry for her friend as she cursed Subaru's name. She would travel to Typhon's tomb and apologize for letting Subaru be around children.
He slapped himself across the face. "Stop getting distracted! There's less than five days left!"
"Five days for what?"
Subaru's head shot up at the familiar, youthful voice. Out of the dwindling shadows, a short figure stepped towards him. Her golden eyes gleamed as they passed over him, causing her smile to widen.
"Flu-Flu looks hungry," Daphne said. She sat down on the bench beside him and gave a fanged grin. "When's the last time Flu-Flu ate?"
Subaru gaped at her before easing his face into a twisted smile. "Just a few minutes ago, actually," he said airily, "but I'm thinking about having another snack soon."
Daphne's smile widened as if she hadn't agreed with something more in her short life. She then looked around them, more specifically at the still-retreating shadows. "What are all those?"
He raised his eyebrows, not used to non-food-related questions from the golden-eyed girl. Nonetheless, he responded, "Yin magic. Blocked off all senses."
"That's so cool! How do you do that?"
"Pretty well, I'd say." He kept his face carefully blank. "You know, it's a bit weird seeing you here. I'd have thought you'd be in the Tower by now, what with your Centipede Coffin being as fast as it is."
Daphne shrugged. "I smelled something good. Lots of snacks. Wanted to eat. Then, I saw Flu-Flu, so I wanted to come over and say that I love you."
His eyes flashed. "Ah, thanks for that. I wasn't sure before, but after you said that last part, well…"
One moment, they were calmly sitting side-by-side on the bench. The next, Subaru had the grey-haired girl pinned to the ground. Cold hands wrapped around her neck as his strong thumbs pressed into her collarbone.
Subaru's subdued expression hadn't changed.
"You're a real dumbshit, you know that? I mean, I know you were trying to get me to let my guard down, but like…Wow. You're not a bad actress, I'll give you that, but you're pretty crazy if you think I wouldn't immediately recognize that something was off with my daughter.
"When Daphne says my name, the emphasis is always on the first 'Flu,' not the second. It's been more than a few hours, so she would have given me a hug the second she saw me. She would have given me this grin that's the slightest bit lopsided to the right side of her face, giving her this cute, dopey look. Whenever she talks about food, she shakes a little bit in excitement. She wouldn't bother asking about the shadows. She'd say something about Shaula or Satella before diverting the topic back to food.
"But you know what really gave it away? The one mistake you made that proved you weren't who you were pretending to be?
"Daphne has never, ever said that she loved me."
A satisfying crack filled the air. The girl's neck had snapped beneath his fingertips. Blood seeped from her open mouth as her eyes stared up at nothing.
Subaru scoffed at the pathetic display. "Oh, please. You've had worse, haven't you? There was a literal war over you. Don't tell me that your ex-boyfriend took all those hits for you. I know your Sin isn't exactly associated with bravery—unless it's the stupid, chauvinistic kind—but this's just ridiculous!"
The girl, bearing the visage of the one whose approval he craved the most, couldn't do more than gurgle and choke on her own blood. The vertebrae in her neck, so casually and mercilessly shattered by the man above her, twisted and shifted back into place. Seeing her body repair itself, Subaru's anger spiked.
"I knew it! I fucking knew it was you! What, do you get off on pretending to be my daughter?! Huh, Witch of Lust?! You get turned on acting like a little kid, a literal child, to lure in adults?! A married man?! You're a creep! A sicko! A psychopath! You're worse than I could ever be! What the actual fuck is wrong with you?! Why the fuck would you do that?! Is it because of your bodyguards?! Is it because I killed them all?! Who fucking cares?! Huh?! Not me! Stop it! Stop crying! Her eyes aren't allowed to cry! What, are you crying 'cause they died?! They deserved it! They knew what they were getting into! It's your fault that they died! You brought them here! You killed them all, you stupid bitch!"
At that, she stopped struggling and locked eyes with him. A horrible feeling tried to enter him, but Satella's love managed to fight it off.
At least, he thought it would.
The last time he had experienced such a thing, it was merely a passive. It was an ability that the young woman feared above all else.
Now, however, it was a deliberate attack. Subaru could do nothing to stop the assault. He continued his verbal barrage, not realizing that his breath was short. He didn't notice when his grip became weaker, and his face turned bluer than the girl's under him.
The girl's appearance shimmered, revealing pale-pink hair and red eyes filled with tears. Subaru tried to scream at her once more, but he had no air in his lungs. He tried to fight off the Authority of Lust, Faceless Bride, but he failed miserably. He tried to gasp, to breathe, but he couldn't remember how. He could only focus on the entity before him and how much he wanted her to stop breathing. He pushed forward, just kept pushing and snapping and breaking her neck…until suddenly, he didn't have any strength left.
The world slowed down. His eyes were open. His mouth was moving. No words escaped his lips. Carmilla looked up at him in terror. His hands remained around their throat, but no force was exerted.
For a single moment—one terrifying second of dawning comprehension—Subaru realized what was about to happen.
'So…this is it, huh? This is how the villain falls.'
Good. He deserved to be stopped.
In his last moments, he prayed to whatever higher beings existed that Shaula would be okay without him. He gave thanks that Daphne would live. He apologized to Geuse for being so cruel. Most of all, he begged Satella for her forgiveness, even as he reaffirmed his everlasting love for her.
Subaru's heart stopped beating, and he let himself be at peace.
Carmilla, the Witch of Lust, wriggled out from under the Sage. Tears burst from her eyes, more powerfully than they had in years.
She didn't ask for this, for any of this! Her bodyguards loved her, and she couldn't live without that love, and now they were gone.
She had just wanted to know why.
Why did Flugel do this? They weren't exactly close friends, but they had been on good terms the few times they had crossed paths. She had even joined a little tea party hosted by Satella. What had Carmilla ever done to them? She didn't understand! She just wanted to understand!
Like a wind chime on a summer breeze, a new voice interrupted Carmilla's thoughts.
"I swear…I will save you…"
Carmilla whipped around, trembling with fear. Kneeling by Subaru's corpse and crying harder than Carmilla ever had…was the woman who had given her the Witch Factor of Lust. The ethereal figure glowed with power as she desperately tried to resuscitate the Sage, but it was clear that she was struggling.
"I w-won't let this worldline fail…Y-you held me in this one, just like you used to! I c-can't let that go to waste! Th-this…this has to be the one! You're not allowed to die yet!"
He didn't take a single breath. She was completely useless.
Carmilla looked on apprehensively. This was the mysterious woman who had ruined her life on a whim…but she was moved by the sheer love emanating off of the platinum-haired girl. She stepped forward, prepared to offer help, but found herself frozen in time.
The woman stood up, hanging her head. Her limbs hung loosely at her sides, and her eyes glistened with tears. "This isn't over," she vowed. "I will save you. I just…need a clear head."
Now, Carmilla had been at the center of many great conflicts. She had witnessed death and destruction that would break all but the bravest of soldiers, and she had shouldered that pain for years.
Throughout all of that, she had never witnessed something quite like this.
From nowhere, two wicked-sharp daggers impaled themselves in each of the woman's eyes. A spear entered her heart from behind and tore through her body before a sword lopped off her head.
A moment later, she stood tall and whole, an empty smile on her face.
As if nothing was amiss, she turned to Carmilla. "How unfortunate that you saw that," she murmured. "I'll make sure to take extra care when removing that from your memory. I have found that it's best for people to remain unaware of my…coping methods."
Pandora's smile remained fixed as she turned back to Subaru. "I see. So, it is merely cardiac arrest. It's been less than a minute, too. Magnificent, is it not? I won't have to perform CPR—I could never quite get the rhythm down. A defibrillator will serve my uses just fine." She cocked her head to the side as a thought passed through her. "Ah…My apologies for being forgetful, my treasured one. In this worldline, I have not brought that level of technology to Lugunica. How unfortunate. For now, it seems a brute-force method must suffice."
She raised her hand to the sky and snapped her fingers, calling down a thin bolt of lightning. Her aim was true, and it struck the Sage directly in his heart.
It began to beat once more.
Pandora sighed, enraptured at the results. He truly was something special to be able to withstand a million volts of electricity, let alone be positively affected by it. She giggled as she imagined his reaction to being in a similar situation to Frankenstein's Monster. "But I suppose that won't come to pass, will it? Neither of you will remember a thing."
She pulled back and began to set up the scene, fondly smiling all the while. The shadows—the remnants of Ul Shamac—completely disappeared, freeing any that might still be affected by them. She placed a temporary block on Subaru's fire magic, knowing that circumventing it would increase his relief and ecstasy upon his success. Carmilla, still inwardly panicking at her lack of control, was laid down on the ground. Subaru was returned to his position over Carmilla with his hands around her throat. His eyelids fluttered open, blearily looking about before locking eyes with her and continuing his assault.
"Magnificent," Pandora breathed. "Such powerful desperation…It is no wonder you remember your love for me."
…But he couldn't remember this. It wasn't part of her desired path. It was merely a correction.
With a single thought, she suppressed their memories of this event so deeply, they could never hope to recover it on their own. However, even if she wanted to, she couldn't remove the feelings attached to them, meaning her request was safe.
She looked upon the scene from afar, making sure everything was as it should be. "Soon," she said at length. "I'll see you soon."
After much struggling, she finally said the words of love that she hadn't dared speak aloud for numerous worldlines.
It was only when she vanished that she allowed herself to cry once more.
Subaru snapped Carmilla's throat over and over to no avail. Every time her face turned blue, his would turn red, and the process would repeat.
"You're disgusting! I hate you! What the fuck do you think you're doing, pretending to be my daughter?! Do you know how fucking cruel it is to hear her say that she loves me?! I take it back, of course, you know! You're the fucking Witch of Lust! You suck up all the love in the world, but you're too damn selfish to give any back! You destroy hearts left and right! Don't you see how fucking superficial that is?! You don't understand love!"
At that, she stopped struggling and locked eyes with him. A horrible feeling tried to enter him, so he relied on Satella's love to fight it off.
But it couldn't. He just kept ranting and raving, even as his breath slowed to a crawl.
"Love is b-becoming one with her! Love is protecting her innocence and p-purity from the horrors of this world! Love is working your d-d-damn hardest to keep her safe! L-love is taking from those who don't deserve it and giving it all to her! Love is needing her love above all else!
"You d-don't understand that, you Witch! You j-just, think it's something owed to you! You just…j-just…haah…"
The girl's appearance shimmered, revealing pale-pink hair and red eyes filled with tears. Subaru tried to scream at her once more, but he had no air in his lungs. He tried to fight off the Authority of Lust, Faceless Bride, but he failed miserably. He tried to gasp, to breathe, but he couldn't remember what that meant. He could only focus on the entity before him and how much he wanted her to stop breathing. He pushed forward, snapping and breaking her neck…until suddenly, he didn't have any strength left.
'So…this is it, huh? All that work for nothing.'
He was really just giving up, huh? Pathetic. He never was able to keep his promises, and Satella had always suffered for it.
But now, it wasn't just her life, was it? Her very existence was in danger. Her soul was in his hands, and he needed to fight for it.
He tried to push off of Carmilla, but he didn't have the strength. He tried to scream, but he didn't have any air in his lungs. His eyelids fluttered shut, even as he desperately clung to life. He—
It was as if a taut cord was cut, rebounding and striking him in the chest. A bone-white blade slashed in front of him, allowing him to breathe once more.
A single sword swipe had cut the connection between Subaru and Carmilla.
"Yer a reckless prick," Reid Astrea grumbled. "Firs', ya blind yer only ally, an' then ya—"
A heavy silence fell upon them. Reid looked at Carmilla with his jaw dropped. "…M-Ma? Is…No, it couldn't be, right? But I…So many years…"
Reid spoke faster and faster, becoming more fervent than ever before. His face slowly turned from red to blue as his eyes pleaded for something that his words could not. Upon witnessing this, Carmilla bunched up her hands in her scarf and tried not to cry.
He stepped forward before stopping abruptly. He clenched a hand in a claw grip over his heaving chest and glared at Carmilla.
"I s-see," he said, forcing the words out through empty lungs. "Nifty little trick ya g-got there…but it ain't nothin' next to Reid Astrea."
He slashed downwards, breaking the connection between them. It fell to the ground like a limp string before dissipating into the ether.
"I caught ya…little whore."
Subaru stood up on shaky legs, gasping for breath. He had barely paid any attention to the fact that Reid Astrea, the greatest swordsman in the land, had some mommy issues. None of that mattered in the face of his goals.
For the first time in days, his thoughts were clear. He knew his plans. He knew what he needed to do. He knew how to kill Carmilla.
He would save Satella.
With a voice devoid of compassion, he spoke a single word.
"Goa."
…Nothing happened.
Subaru's palms began to sweat. It had just worked moments prior. What the hell was going on?
Maybe he should go back to using magic the way he knew beest.
He shoved out his arm and reached for that familiar spark of fire mana.
Nothing. He couldn't conjure fire.
Moments ago, his breathing had stopped. Now, it picked up in full force, barreling along like a train about to run him over. Looking over at Reid—whose chest was still heaving—he couldn't help but wonder if he was taking the swordsman's lost oxygen.
Bereft of his plans, Subaru had only one thing he could do. He dove towards Carmilla and tackled her to the ground once more. This time, however, he refused to look at her or even pay any attention to her.
She squeaked at the sudden motion. "G-get off…me?" she ordered, though it came out as a request. "Wh-what did I ever do to you?!"
Subaru ignored her. "Hey, Reid," he called out, almost casually. The redheaded man was on his knees, panting and regaining his bearings. "Do you know how to make a fire with your chopsticks?"
Carmilla's pale face, normally a delicate porcelain, turned white as a sheet. She once again begged him to tell her why he was doing this to her, but she didn't receive a direct answer. She only managed to pick up a mumbled, "For love. It's always been for love."
"…Oh," she breathed. "It's for your wife, isn't it?"
Entire wars have been fought for Carmilla's sake. She entranced people so deeply, they would gladly lay down their lives if only so they could gaze upon her for a moment. Whether they saw their lover, the one they pursued, a family member, a dear friend, or even someone long dead, people killed for her affection and attention while claiming it's for love.
For someone to kill her out of love for another, however…Part of Carmilla understood—and even appreciated—the sentiment. She wouldn't mind dying like that.
So…why couldn't she stop crying?
Subaru called out to Reid once more. The swordsman caught his breath and glared. "I heard ya th'first time, ya twat. Why th'fuck d'ya need fire fer?"
In response, Subaru pulled a knife out of his robe…and stabbed Carmilla in the heart. Her screams of pain echoed across the empty town, but she didn't die. He twisted the knife before wrenching it out and calmly slitting her throat. Her skin stitched itself together, reattaching her head and allowing her to cry once more.
Subaru gave Reid a look that said, "Well, she's not gonna die normally."
Reid stared blankly at the bloody, screaming woman pinned to the ground. "…Huh. Well, I'll be damned. I've seen a lotta shit, but this's jus' silly."
He walked forward and poked Carmilla with his toe. "So, fire, huh?" he mused, stroking his imaginary beard. "Ya say that'll work?"
"She's a vampire," Subaru explained, "though I guess the proper term is 'curse doll.' Currently, the only known way to kill one is by burning them to death."
Reid shrugged. "Seems fair to me." He caught Carmilla's eyes and put on a sheepish smile. "Yer a hottie, so I'm not toohappy 'bout this. Then again, I doubt Trisha would mind if I make a Witch suffer a bit."
At that, Carmilla's struggling increased tenfold. "P-please, don't! I d-didn't do anything! I kn-know it's for l-love, b-but you can still m-make it quick, r-right? Wh-what would Satella say if she knew you w-wanted to cause unnecessary pain?"
That was the wrong thing to say.
Subaru's eyes turned cold. "Kill her, Reid," he said flatly. "Burn her until there's nothing left."
Reid's faux hesitation vanished. He sheathed his sword, took out his chopsticks, and began to rub the wood together. They were a blur, moving at inhuman speeds against each other.
The wood didn't deteriorate in the slightest.
No flint or other metal was needed; the sheer amount of friction was enough to make a spark. The chopsticks began to glow like the setting sun behind him, eventually bursting into white-hot flames.
A dark chuckle escaped Reid, and he pointed the burning wood at the young woman with a taunting grin. His eyes reflected the firelight as he slowly approached her with a hungry gleam in his eye.
Carmilla's screams echoed throughout the empty town until she was nothing but ash.
She was adrift in a sea of unconsciousness, never waking up for more than a moment. When she opened her eyes to an empty room, she shut them again. When she closed her eyes and embraced oblivion, she anxiously awaited death and the end of her pain. She wanted her heart to stop racing, her body to stop aching, and to stop vomiting blood. If she were to always wake up to this, then what was the point of waking up at all?
Despite all that, Satella's greatest wish was to see her husband once more.
She knew she had visitors, of course. She had often confused them for Subaru, only realizing that it was Geuse or Shaula after they had departed. She had wanted to call out to them, to apologize for her mistake and let them know how grateful she was for their presence, but she was so tired.
Speaking hurt. Moving hurt. Thinking hurt. She just wanted to sleep, forever.
And yet, she wanted nothing more than to stay awake when Subaru finally sat down by her bedside.
For a moment, she had thought it was Minerva, or Typhon, or even a few distantly familiar presences, but she knew it was Subaru. He looked like Subaru. He felt like Subaru. He even cried like Subaru.
With trembling, too-thin fingers, she slowly reached up and dried his tears. "Do not cry, my love," she said in the strongest voice she could muster. "Everything will be okay."
She only had a few days left, but she would gladly spend every waking moment comforting him.
She gathered him in her arms, feeling somewhat rejuvenated at his touch. She continued to whisper sweet nothings into his ear, feeling more secure than she had in months.
He took a shuddering breath. "I-I'm sorry," he croaked. "I'm s-such a fuck-up, and it was all so fucking pointless, and I—"
"Shh…'Tis okay, Subaru."
He tried to vehemently deny it, so she pulled him into her chest and stroked his hair. "I know not what sins you have committed, but…so long as you can cry, you are still my Subaru."
He was quiet for a moment. "S-so…even you think that I've always been like this?"
"Mhm. You're the same wonderful man that I fell in love with. No matter what you do, or how much we fight, you are mySubaru, forever and always. Through struggle and strife, through sickness and health, we've always acted in each other's best interest."
She looked down at him with a smile—her first in almost two weeks. He may have appeared differently to everyone who gazed upon him, but she saw the love in those dark-brown eyes as she ran her fingers through his midnight-black hair. She saw the man who fell from the sky and stole her heart. "Even if the world would turn its back on us, I will always be there to love you. I will always be there to forgive you. You are my salvation, so let me be yours."
His shaking increased tenfold. "But…I've done horrible things, and I'm about to do even worse."
On a normal day, she would have questioned his statement and tried convincing him to stop. Now, however, her number one priority was making sure he was okay before sleep took her once more.
"What did I tell you, my love? You could do anything, and I will forgive you so long as you return to my arms."
He burrowed his face into her chest, soaking her dress. "Not…not this. You can't forgive me. I don't want you to forgive me."
A smile spread across her lips. It drained most of her energy, but it was worth it to comfort him. "Such a shame, then, that I will. Even when I'm gone, I'll look down upon you and our little girls, happy that I had once been part of such a wonderful family."
If anything, that seemed to break him further. She began to whisper sweet nothings once more, but, to her dismay, her eyelids fluttered shut. As she drifted off to sleep, she wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in the crook of his neck. "Please…stay with me."
He placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. "I swear…I will save you."
The next time she woke up, he was gone.
Deep within the Augria Sand Dunes was a structure unlike any other in the world. The Pleiades Watchtower, designed and constructed by the Sage, was taller than the clouds and sleeker than a silver dagger. Its purposes were innumerable, and it performed each of its functions admirably.
And yet, when they had first brought Daphne there, it wasn't for the Tower, but the surrounding desert.
Shortly after the incident where she was pursued by knights, Subaru had forbidden Daphne from creating mabeasts, but it was having a negative effect on her body—she needed to create them, similar to how a spirit needed to release mana.
The problem, however, was not that she needed to create mabeasts…but the law.
Mabeasts were, essentially, a life-form infested with miasma, or cursed mana. They were created using rituals known only to a select few—performing one could get a person executed. Luckily, the rituals contained spells that were extremelydifficult to cast, so there wasn't much of an issue with mabeast overpopulation. Even so, controlling them was a laughable concept—only the legendary Mother of Mabeasts was said to be able to do that.
And then there was Daphne.
Daphne created mabeasts of unbelievable strength merely with her thoughts. If Shaula were any indication, they viewed her as their "Mother." By all counts, that means she should be the Mother of Mabeasts, but the title felt…wrong, almost as if it belonged to someone else. Still, what Daphne did was amaz—dangerous, very dangerous, so a faraway desert was an excellent place for her to release that pent-up energy without hurting anyone.
The reason behind them being there had been morbid, yes, but Daphne's excitement was so…contagious. She'd dance around, hugging each new mabeast and spouting random facts about them. The Wulgarm's curses were super powerful. The Guiltylowe was really good at catching food. The White Whale absorbed mana like crazy. Wasn't it so cool, Flue-Flue? Do you also want to hug my bunny, Tella-Tella?
"N-no thank you," Satella had said, "but this is incredible, Daphne. I'm so very proud of you."
Daphne's smile had been blinding and unforgettable.
For a while, it was a scheduled thing; they'd all travel to the Tower in regular intervals so that Daphne could release all of her excess energy. Subaru had jokingly called it their "vacation home," which Daphne had taken to heart. Whether he liked it or not, she developed a habit of disappearing for days, weeks, or even months to do…whatever. Eat, probably. Maybe find a nice cave or tree to sleep in. She just did her own thing, but at least she always came back home, be it to the mansion or—after Subaru's comment—the Tower.
These disappearances used to terrify Subaru and Satella. Was Daphne okay? Was she kidnapped? Did she run away? Did she hate them? Was she safe? Was she alive? She was probably so hungry! They'd scour the land, searching relentlessly for their missing daughter, only to find her napping after a particularly large meal. They had a long talk with her after that…and the time after that…and dozens of times after that. Somehow, she always managed to sneak out. It wasn't as if she were trying to escape, nor were her parents inattentive; it's just that one of them would turn away for a moment, and she'd be off looking for food.
It took a couple of years, but she eventually got a bit better about telling them when she was "going on an adventure." It still worried them as it would any parent, but they had become fairly accustomed to it. As such, he wasn't too worried when Daphne said she'd be going to the Tower to make some mabeasts.
As Subaru stood before the entrance of the Tower, he wished Daphne hadn't told him anything. Perhaps if he were clueless as to her location, she would be safe.
Sand time—a yin magic defense mechanism— turned on behind him. Spacetime distorted, preventing anyone from reaching the Tower…or from leaving it. One could only break through Sand Time via either teleportation or during a sandstorm—not that anyone else knew about the latter, of course. He was sure that someone like Echidna could use her Book of Wisdom to figure it out, but why would she?
In other words, no one would interrupt his task.
His thoughts were racing, but he felt…stable. Falling asleep in Satella's arms had grounded him to reality, but one night of relative warmth was not enough to ease the weight of the Sins lurking around his soul.
He took a deep breath to calm his pounding heart. It didn't work. He opened the door anyway.
The moment he entered the threshold, he was tackled by a blur of purple and grey.
"Flu-Flu! Flu-Flu is here!"
Bereft of her restraints and Centipede Coffin, Daphne embraced her favorite person, grinning like crazy. Her golden eyes gleamed with fulfillment, making her seem more human than Witch.
Subaru kneeled down to her level and managed a shaky smile. "H-hey, Daph. Um…s-surprise?"
She responded by burrowing her face in his chest and purring like a demonic kitten. Having long grown used to this kind of behavior, Subaru returned her embrace, stroking her hair as he held her.
"I-I figured I'd stop by," he prattled on. "I just…I guess I needed to see the real you. I missed you so much."
"I missed Flu-Flu, too."
He stiffened at that. Daphne had never, ever expressed her affection so blatantly with words, unless it was something like "Flu-Flu loves me," or "Tella-Tella thinks I'm cute." She had always shown her love with her actions, and Subaru had always appreciated that about her. Sure, he wanted to hear her adorable voice say such sweet words, but he wasn't too bent out of shape about it. For her to suddenly say that…
He pulled back and grabbed her by the shoulders, staring her straight in the eyes. Her trademarked dopey, fanged grin was present and as wide as ever. She swayed side-to-side, but her gaze remained locked to his. Most importantly, the Witch Factor of Lust lay heavily on his soul. This was Daphne, through and through. So, why would she suddenly say something like that?
"Flu-Flu keeps me full," she said, as if in response to his thoughts. "I need Flu-Flu's hugs, or I'll get super hungry."
"I've always been curious about that," he admitted, unable to muster the energy to speak loudly. "Tables, sure, I get why they fill you up, but hugs? They're not food."
Daphne gave him a look as if he were the weird one. "Food is how you make your belly full, not your heart."
She may as well have punched him in the gut.
Any other time, he would have gathered her up in his arms and let her know exactly how much those words meant to him. Now, however, the words "four days" were whispered into his ear, crushing all incoming affection and doubt. Like the snake to Eve, the devil tempted Subaru to fall deeper into Sin.
His hands tightened a bit around Daphne's shoulders as he did everything that he could to ignore that voice. "Let's…let's go upstairs. Why don't you show me some of the new mabeasts you've created?"
Her eyes lit up. She grabbed him by the hand and led him up the twisting stairways of the Tower, chatting all the while. "I almost forgot to tell you! Today, I ate twenty mabeasts, sixteen loaves of bread, forty-two tables—"
"But we only have six tables!"
"—seven bricks, three glasses, ten appas, and no people!"
She looked back at him expectantly. He ruffled her hair and said, "Good job, Daph. Proud of you."
Her brilliant smile broke his heart.
They reached one of the balconies, giving quite the view of the desert. Sand stretched endlessly in all directions, proving that their isolation was not an illusion. The space twisted in front of them like rippling water in a pond, granting an ethereal beauty to an otherwise desolate plane.
Daphne didn't care about any of that. She walked up to the edge and pointed down at the little black dots moving through the sand. "Those are Hungry Horse Kings, and they're super-duper spicy! That one is the Black Serpent, but I haven't tried it yet. It's a meanie that eats all the other mabeasts before I can. Those are Sand Earthworms, but they're a bit hard to catch, so I've only been able to eat twelve of them. That one is…"
With every word, she stepped closer and closer to the edge, Subaru following close behind. No railing or wall would prevent her from falling to her death. A light gust of wind, let alone a push, would send her careening over the edge, where her skull would crack open and her organs would splatter across the sand.
The image terrified Subaru. He quickly pulled her back, keeping her secure in his arms. "Damn it, don't get so close to the edge! What if you fall?!"
He sat down and placed Daphne in his lap, simultaneously using earth magic to raise the ledge. It wasn't enough to block anything, but at least a certain someone wouldn't accidentally trip over it.
"Flu-Flu worries too much," Daphne grumbled. "I usually get way closer, and I'm just fine."
"This is why I don't like letting you come here alone!"
She rolled her eyes but didn't bother trying to break free. She relaxed into his arms and resumed babbling about her mabeasts, the entire incident forgotten in favor of discussing food.
Subaru sighed, but whether it was out of relief or some kind of existential suffering, he wasn't sure. Whatever it was, he found himself relaxing, as well. Right here, when it was just the two of them, he was almost able to forget what was going on, if only for a moment.
He rested his chin on her head, feeling calm for the first time in almost two weeks. He had said he was too far gone—redemption was certainly out of reach—but it wasn't like it was over. Daphne was here, safe and happy. Shaula still had her mother. Subaru might even be able to nullify the contract with Pandora, therefore allowing Satella to reincarnate again. Normally that would be impossible, but Satella was always the exception with the Od Laguna.
Besides, Subaru would be dead in a few days, right? The least he could do was protect Daphne from himself.
He placed a gentle kiss on her hair, smiling slightly as she giggled. Doing this for the rest of his short life sounded nice.
Was he pathetic for giving up, just like that? No fanfare, no grand conflict—just a simple "sorry, no can do." Maybe his lack of conviction was a sign of weakness, but he was loath to call being a good father "pathetic."
He closed his eyes, listening to the Witch Factors screaming inside of him. He sent them a sincere apology, even though it wasn't remotely enough to make up for what he had done. At least they could rest easy knowing that he'd be with them soon.
He wrapped his arms tighter around Daphne. He would—
"Four days," a voice whispered. "There are only four days left to save her. Soon, it will be only three."
He brushed off that ever-intrusive voice as if it were nothing more than a devil on his shoulder.
"You made a promise."
Promises were invalid when a loved one was in danger.
"Your loved one is in danger!"
Only from himself, and he would protect her.
He looked down at the child in his arms. Daphne's Sin should have made her frantic with hunger, but she looked so…content. How could he have ever thought about taking that away from her?
He gave a heavy sigh. Out loud, he said, "It's getting dark out. Why don't you get some sleep, and we'll continue this tomorrow?"
Daphne pouted but soon gave in. "Tuck me in," she ordered.
He rolled his eyes. "Spoiled brat. Fine." He let her climb up onto his back, carrying her to her room on Alcyone. "I swear, you're thirteen years old, yet you act like you're three."
She reached down and poked his cheek. "Flu-Flu is mean. I'm not three."
"I know. As I said, you're—"
"Almost five."
He jolted, nearly dropping her in the process. "Wh-what?! Didn't you say that you were nine when I rescued you?!"
"Nine months, silly."
"Months?! You're telling me you were a fu—a freaking baby?! How the heck were you able to speak? O-or look as old as you are? Actually, you haven't aged a day since I met you, but…Ah, shi—poop! I said poop! It's just…your species is weird, Daph."
He probably should have freaked out for longer, but Subaru had experienced inter-dimension travel, Witches, soul shenanigans, a swordsman who could cut the concept of speech using a pair of wooden chopsticks, and a dragon that could fold space-time. Daphne's species having a different growth rate wasn't remotely the strangest thing about her.
Eventually, they made it to her room. As he expected, her bed was mysteriously absent. He crafted another one, apologizing as he did so. "Sorry, Daph. Ella would do a way better job."
Daphne crawled on top of the bed, picking cotton off of the blanket as she did so. She popped the fabric in her mouth, swallowing it whole. She shrugged. "Flu-Flu made it, so it tastes just fine."
She curled up on top of one of the pillows like a kitten and promptly fell back asleep. Her snores echoed through the tower like a freight train, slightly rumbling the floor beneath him.
"You're such a weirdo," Subaru mumbled. To this day, he didn't know how a girl with such an adorable voice could snore like a speeding truck. "Love ya anyway, Daph."
He turned and left the room but not before hearing a nearly-inaudible, "You, too."
He froze, then shook his head. He had simply misheard her. The Witch Factors' cries mixed with Daphne's snores were overwhelming his senses.
After all, no one could ever love a murderer.
He entered his bedroom with a sigh. It was pointless to act like everything was normal right now. Daphne was in the next room, and he had made plans to kill her. How horrible was he to hold her like that? How dare he tell her that he loves her while a dagger weighed heavily in his pocket?
Pathetic. He was the worst of the worst.
He sat on the bed, turning on the nearby lamp as he did so. Its silver light bathed the room with its otherworldly glow, filling him with the strangest sense of comfort. There was one just like it in the Forbidden Library, and he had always held a particular fondness for it. So, when creating the Tower, his desires had manifested an exact copy here.
"Magic is weird, huh?" he said aloud. "I didn't exactly plan to bring you around, but I wanted you here, so you came along."
Call him crazy, but he liked to imagine that the lamp felt pleased by his statement.
He put his head in his hands and let out a low groan. "Now I'm talking to a fucking lamp. I really am a psychotic piece of shit. Then again, that wasn't really up for debate, was it?"
He had strangled Carmilla with a blank expression. He had sent Volcanica to destroy Sekhmet. He had poisoned and stabbed Calypso. He had ordered Puck to drive Minerva to insanity. He had lured Typhon, a literal child, and drowned her.
Now, he was talking to a lamp. To think that he felt more lucid today than he had in a week…What a fucking mess. He couldn't imagine what would happen if he had followed through and killed Daphne.
The mere thought made his throat close up. His heart pounded against its cage, desperately trying to escape the monster it kept alive. Was he actually backing out? How had he not come to terms with this yet? What happened to all of his inner monologues about not questioning his resolve? Why was he turning back?
"…It's because this is different."
Typhon was a child that was important to both him and Satella. Minerva was their best friend.
"But Daphne's our daughter." Just like Shaula, she was as important to him as—
"No one is as important as Satella."
The voice was becoming easier and easier to brush off.
"Two days," an intrusive voice said urgently. "The clock is ticking."
'Wait, two? Wasn't it four days left?'
He was losing track of time again, but that didn't matter. Deadlines were now irrelevant.
The silver glow in his room was now oppressive and heavy. The dagger he carried dug into his leg, but he didn't care. Better his own flesh than anyone else's.
The Witch Factor of Envy laughed bitterly. It must be reminiscing about how that very same dagger had stabbed her in the heart. She was likely encouraging him to do the same.
Subaru pulled it out of his pocket and gazed at it contemplatively. So many times, he had thought of ending it all and putting a stop to this senseless bloodbath, but he'd never managed the resolve; there was a reason he needed that contract with Pandora. However, now he could physically hear Daphne in the other room. That was more than enough resolve for him…to end this pointless quest.
He had promised Satella that he would save her. He had promised Shaula that he would never leave her. He had promised Daphne that he would love and provide for her.
One promise didn't rise above another. They never have, not for a single moment.
"…Huh."
He thought that a realization like that would have felt more…poignant, especially considering everything that he had said and done. He had made sure that everyone around him knew that Satella came first…but his wife had seen through it, even when he himself had begun to believe it.
Satella was right. This wasn't him. Well, not entirely. He was still a fucking mess, and he wasn't that great of a person. Hell, he was a terrible person. He was a liar and a cheat. He would gladly destroy the world to save his number one.
Except…he had multiple "number ones," and choosing between them was impossible. If it ever came to that, then Subaru only had one option available to him.
It was time to enact a sinner's retribution on Typhon's behalf. He held his dagger up to his throat, and—
The light in the room seemed to brighten. Satella came first. She always came first.
He didn't know when he had started crying, but the tears on his cheeks had already dried.
Hours later, he stumbled out of the room. He clutched the dagger in trembling fingers, apologizing all the while. His footsteps were massive drums, booming through his eardrums and wreaking havoc on his mind. His heart throbbed painfully, pumping its toxic, cursed blood to undeserving organs. His breath was poisonous ash, desecrating the air around him.
"There's no turning back," the voice reminded him. He wholeheartedly agreed.
Flames of shadow danced on the walls, guided by the rays of the morning sun. Subaru hadn't slept a wink. He had merely sat on his bed, staring at his dagger and thinking about how there was no life without Satella.
She had saved him from a loveless existence. She had healed his broken body and brought it back to life with her love. She had taken away his nightmares with a gentle kiss, and she had become the light that drowned out the darkness of his sorrow.
He would do anything for Satella.
He pushed open the door to Daphne's room. The child—having not even reached her fifth year—lay curled up on the floor. The bed he had conjured was nowhere to be found.
She picked her head up off the floor and looked at him, grinning all the while. "Good morning, Flu-Flu!" she said cheerily. To most, it would seem that she couldn't tell anything was amiss, but her next line said it all. "Flu-Flu wants to eat, doesn't he?"
Quivering white knuckles held the dagger at his side, pointing it directly at her. "I-I don't want to," he croaked, "but I've made my choice."
She yawned cutely, stretching her arms wide. Cracking an eye open and smiling, she said, "Flu-Flu's really smart, so I know he's made the right one!"
A lump formed in his throat. "You d-don't know what you're saying! You have no idea what I'm planning!"
"That's not true."
The levity in her voice had abruptly disappeared, throwing him off balance. Her smile had dropped, causing him to feel even worse. Her eyes, so often glazed over in either hunger or childlike wonder, pierced straight through him.
"Flu-Flu talks to himself sometimes," she said quietly. Her gaze drifted down to the dagger, yet she didn't flinch. "It's gotten worse recently."
He averted his eyes. So, even Daphne—a girl as single-minded as Shaula—knew how insane he was.
The little girl fidgeted with her purple dress. "I know what happened to Ty-Ty and Nerva-Nerva. Flu-Flu doesn't need to hide it anymore." She bit her lip: a habit she had picked up from Satella. "I want to save Tella-Tella, too. Tella-Tella has so much left to eat."
Subaru said nothing, but the tears fell harder. Daphne made her way over to him and wrapped her arms around him, regaining a bit of her smile at the contact.
Subaru tentatively returned her embrace with his free arm. "It's not fair…None of this is fair! You're five, Daphne! Hell, even if you weren't, you're still my kid! You shouldn't have to…D-Daphne?"
A hot drop of water had fallen on his arm.
Daphne was crying.
"I-It's okay," she said, her youthful tones cracking under the weight of her words. "I'm okay with this."
He wasn't okay with this.
"Flu-Flu's hugs make my heart feel full, remember? That's all I want. I'm happy now."
He hugged her tighter but didn't make any other motions.
She shook in his arms but didn't pull back. She determinedly stayed there and accepted her fate. "T-Tella-Tella comes first for Flu-Flu. That's okay." She looked up at him, no longer hiding her tears. "J-just make sure that Sha-Sha is taken care of, okay? Sh-she isn't very good at being alone."
The knife trembled violently. "I—"
"A-and maybe you c-can tell me that you love me, just one more time?"
Those vulnerable, golden eyes gazed at him, pleading for him to say yes.
The knife moved ever-so-slightly.
"I love you, Daphne. I've loved you since the moment you came into my life."
The knife moved more and more…but not towards her.
"Finding you was like discovering the world's greatest treasure. Life is worth living because you're in it. You, Satella, and Shaula are everything to me. I love you—all of you—so much, it hurts. I'd do anything for you. That's why…wh-why I…"
The knife clattered to the smooth, stone floor.
"That's why I can't do this."
He fell to his knees before her and bowed his head. His hands fell to her shoulders and he held her at arm's length, keeping her a safe distance away from him. Hot tears fell heavier than rain, as the sound of his sobs echoed throughout the Tower.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, but he didn't know who he was apologizing to. Was it to Daphne, for even thinking about hurting her? To Shaula, for almost taking away her beloved mother? To the other Witches, whom he had so pointlessly slaughtered? Or to Satella, whose soul he had just condemned to oblivion?
Maybe he was apologizing to himself for becoming the monster that he had once promised to protect Satella from.
Daphne's arms encircled him once more. She began to rock the both of them to a rhythm that only she could match. After a long period of silence, she tentatively said, "I thought Tella-Tella came first."
With great effort, he broke past the walls that he had constructed for himself and spoke the truth. "You're my daughterDaphne. You are my number one, just like Satella is."
There. Finally, she knew how important she was to him.
At length, she asked, "Does this mean Tella-Tella won't be eating anymore?"
He shook his head listlessly.
"…Oh." She took a shaky breath. With understanding unbefitting her youthful face, she asked, "Can you take me to say goodbye?"
His sobs tripled in intensity. Of course, he could do that.
He stood up, holding her hand as he did so. He was about to teleport, but she stopped him by gently tugging on his arm.
"Flu-Flu?"
"Yeah?"
She struggled with herself for some time. With great effort, she managed to say, "…I love you."
He froze. "Wh-What?"
She looked away, embarrassed. "Tella-Tella and Sha-Sha, too," she added meekly. "You all make my heart feel full."
His throat dried up. He couldn't respond, even though he desperately wanted to.
Her bottom lip quivered, and tears came into her eyes. "I'll miss Tella-Tella a lot, b-but…if I have Flu-Flu and Sha-Sha, maybe everything will be okay?"
Okay. Everything would be okay.
Daphne. Shaula. Subaru. No Satella.
Could they—could he be okay without Satella? He had never considered such a thing.
Their eyes met, dark-brown to gold. Her tears fell heavier than he had ever thought possible. She wasn't actually telling him that things would be okay; she was asking for reassurance.
'She needs me,' he realized. 'Now, more than ever, she needs her dad.'
He had made a promise to both Satella and Daphne. In recent years, he had made sure that everyone knew which promise he valued more.
Satella had seen right through that bullshit.
But…if they were equal, how could he choose? How could he choose between his wife and his daughter? What answer was there besides no choice at all?
Maybe…it shouldn't be his choice. Maybe he should listen to them and do what they wanted him to do. And yet, their views conflicted, too. Daphne had said that she would sacrifice herself for Satella. Satella would say to let her go.
But Daphne was a Witch, so she didn't know what she was talking about! Satella's self-esteem was utter garbage, so of course, she'd put Daphne over herself!
…Just like any good parent would.
Once upon a time, he would have done the same in a heartbeat, but was it still true? After everything he'd done, could he just…turn back?
"Flu-Flu."
Daphne's drooping golden eyes, overflowing with tears, bared her soul to him. "Let's go home."
Hearing those words, his heart decided for him.
"…Okay, Daph. Let's…let's go see your mom."
The corners of her lips twitched upwards. She wiped her tears with her free hand before saying, "Okay…Dad."
For the first time in months, his smile reached his eyes.
No more words needed to be said. Hand in hand, father and daughter, Subaru and Daphne faced their future, together. He took a deep breath, squeezed her hand, gathered his power, and—
Darkness.
He tried to move but couldn't. He tried to speak, to breathe, but couldn't. He tried to cast a spell, but he didn't have a gate.
'What the hell is happening?! Where's Daphne?! This isn't the Tower!'
With his only weapon being his senses and his thoughts, Subaru looked around, but there was; nothing to see; the area was pitch-black. The stench of blood, sweat, and other bodily fluids assaulted him. Cold metal pressed against his back, but it wasn't a wall. It was more like…bars? Was he in prison? How did he even get here?
"Welcome back, my treasured one."
From the darkness came a blinding light, illuminating the room. No furniture accompanied the blood-red walls; there was only a door, bolted shut with four sets of locks. In the center of the tiny expanse was Subaru…trapped in a cage.
Sitting opposite him, with her knees pulled to her chest, was Pandora.
Except…it wasn't the Pandora he had met. Pandora was a woman around the same age as Subaru, bearing a serene smile and a nigh-unshakeable calm demeanor. Her hair was a sleek platinum, and her eyes were a brilliant sapphire. This, however, was a somber child around the age of ten, looking completely different. Her thin, bony arms wrapped around her knees in a protective gesture. Manastone shackles bound her to a stake in the ground. Her dark eyes, on the verge of tears, stared listlessly at the bars behind Subaru.
Even so, he knew that this was Pandora.
She sighed heavily. "How many times have we been here, my treasured one? Hundreds? Thousands? You know that I love seeing you, but even I am growing tired of these games."
He tried to respond, but his jaw wouldn't open.
Her dark eyes flitted to him for a moment. "You desire an explanation, yes? This is my domain: the manifestation of my innermost thoughts. All Witches have one, but few discover it."
She leaned her head back against the bars with a light thunk, training her eyes on the top of the cage. "Such a shame that my domain's default appearance is this cursed place. Then again, it is a reminder of what you and my princess saved me from, so I'm not entirely ungrateful." She raised her arm to adjust her filthy, tattered cloth, grimacing at the rattling chains. "Still, it's a bit cramped. Why don't we go somewhere a bit more…pleasant?"
The air around them shimmered and cracked, fading to white. A second later, Subaru—still completely immobile—found himself sitting in a plastic chair. Empty bookshelves, painted a faded light-green, stretched in all directions.
It was the library back in Japan, but it was bereft of both books and people.
Pandora sat in the chair to his right. Her arms were folded on the table, and she laid the side of her head on them as she faced him. Her attire now matched that of a typical Japanese elementary student, and her malnourished frame was replaced with a healthy one. Coupled with her position and calm demeanor, she looked like a schoolgirl on the verge of sleeping through class.
"It's certainly more spacious," she noted idly, "but it's missing something."
The fingers of her right hand tapped against the table, causing music to waft through the area: the high notes of a familiar piano piece. "There we go. Chopin's Nocturne Number Two often played in the background here, did it not? I'm afraid I only remember the treble, not the bass. It's been an eon since I've stroked the ivory keys." A nostalgic smile spread across her lips. "Do you remember teaching me how to play, my treasured one? Why, I even remember our very first song."
She abruptly transitioned to performing a much simpler piece. It clawed at the edges of his memory, but he couldn't quite place it. "Heart and Soul," she explained. "I never bothered to learn the 'Soul' part. It's a duet, you see, which you said was 'an excellent way to raise the affinity between your party members.' I didn't understand what that meant until one of your later incarnations taught me about video games."
The entire time she was monologuing, Subaru remained immobile. If he were able to speak, he would have asked, "What the fuck are you talking about?!"
There were thousands of questions, but Pandora wasn't about to provide any answers.
Her fingers stilled, and the music stopped. "I digress," she murmured. "Then again, it's not like you'll remember this, anyway. There shouldn't be any harm in letting go for a moment."
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before speaking evenly. "You said the Witch of Gluttony was a treasure…" A lengthy pause filled the air. "…but you had said that to me. Those were my words, and I honor them every single time we speak, my treasured one. And yet, you so casually gave them away. It was not entirely unexpected, yet it hurt more than I'd like to admit.
"But I will not let this discourage me. I have felt your embrace, your tender words of salvation. No matter what, I will see this worldline through to the end.
"Now, let's try this again. I cannot change your emotions or your innermost thoughts, but I can remind you of your own assertions. It is no Divine Protection of Mind Changing, but if I try enough times, my method will work.
"Open your heart to me. May your soul answer my cry. Listen to me…my treasured one."
When she opened her eyes, they were sapphire once more. Sleek, platinum hair framed an otherworldly face. When she spoke, it was like it was his own thoughts, not her words.
"I would do anything for Satella. I owe her my life. I would do anything for her. She's my number one, over everyone else. I'll gladly kill anyone who gets in the way of saving her. It doesn't matter what illusions of love I hold: Satella is the only one that matters."
Subaru's mind struggled against the intrusive thoughts, but it was futile. He was already forgetting the entire encounter. All that remained were the poisonous phrases snaking into his soul.
"I would do anything for Satella."
When Subaru opened his eyes, he was sobbing.
A small, soft hand squeezed his own much-larger ones. He looked down to find Daphne giving him a shaky smile. When did he get to the Tower? He didn't remember teleporting here.
It didn't matter. Only one person did.
He kneeled before Daphne, met her eyes, and mumbled a simple, "H-hey."
She blinked, confused. "…Hi?"
His heart raced, but there was no goal in sight. He tried to wet his lips, but his body was a desert. He trembled violently as he forced himself to meet her gaze. "Sorry for stopping by unannounced. I missed you."
At that, she became visibly agitated. She tried to tear away, but he kept her firmly in his grasp.
"Stay still," he ordered. She eyed him warily but complied. "Less than two weeks ago, you said you'd do anything for Satella, right?"
Dead. He was a dead man. He felt so very empty.
"Y-you even said you'd…stop eating for her. Is th-that still true?"
She shifted uncomfortably. "I don't understand…Flu-Flu just said—"
"Answer me!"
His abrupt shout startled her into silence, and her tears flowed even harder than before. "B-but I thought Flu-Flu chose—"
"Satella! It's always been her! She's the only one that I love!"
Daphne's eyes widened and her lips parted. For one horrible moment, it looked like her world had come crashing down on her.
Subaru had seen Daphne wear many expressions: happy, sad, worried, annoyed, hungry, amused, tired, and more. He had memorized them all, and he was always ecstatic to see a new one…but not now.
This was the first—and the last—time that she would look betrayed.
A lump formed in his throat. "N-no, that's…that's not true, Daph! I swear! I love you so much! I…Shit, you have to believe me! You mean everything to me!"
Daphne gulped and put on a watery smile. "It's okay," she forced out. "Tella-Tella comes first for Flu-Flu."
"But that's—"
…That's what? Not true? Satella certainly came first when he had murdered his closest friend. She absolutely came first when he had drowned a child.
Now, she came before his daughter.
Daphne placed a hand on his cheek, taking him out of his thoughts. "Flu-Flu," she said seriously. "I'm full."
Her words from earlier passed through his mind. "As long as I'm full, I don't care who Flu-Flu eats."
He shook his head furiously. "You're not full! You're never full! I-I know you say that thing about the tables, but that's not…You're not full! Don't say that!"
In response, she wrapped her arms around him, burying her face into his chest. At length, she confessed, "Tables don't taste very good."
Of all the things she could have said, that was not what he was expecting.
Then again, that's just how his daughter was.
"Tables are yucky," she continued. "Bleh, gross-tosey, yuck! They make my belly hurt!"
Despite the circumstances—or maybe to escape them—he asked, "Then why do you eat them?"
"I only eat Flu-Flu's tables," she corrected, "because that's where all of us eat. Us, Sha-Sha, and Tella-Tella. Thinking about it makes my heart feel full."
"Daphne…"
"But Tella-Tella's heart isn't full yet. She needs Flu-Flu."
"She needs you!" he shot back, a hint of panic entering his voice. "She'll want nothing to do with me, but she'll go insane with grief if she loses you!"
He should have known better than to try and convince a Witch.
Cold metal was pressed into his right hand. "It's okay," she repeated. "Tella-Tella comes first for Flu-Flu. Just…t-take good care of Sha-Sha, okay?"
He couldn't see in front of him through his tears. He could barely hear anything aside from his raging heart. He could only sense the knife in his hands…as Daphne guided it to her chest.
This wasn't what he wanted. This was never what he had wanted. He couldn't do this, not to Daphne! He refused to—
Over and over, she told him that it was okay. The entire time, he told her how much he loved her.
Neither stopped embracing the other.
Eventually, the knife met a bit of resistance. Daphne kept trying to pull Subaru's arm towards her, but he wouldn't budge.
"I love you," he croaked. "You're my daughter. You're everything to me. I can't—"
"You can," she insisted. "It's okay. Tella-Tella comes first. Mom comes first."
For an instant, his vision cleared. Daphne's golden eyes, gazing right into his dark ones, were filled with love and fulfillment. She smiled at him, tightened her hands around his…and plunged the knife into her heart.
The world stopped, leaving just the two of them. She never stopped looking up at him, nor did her smile waver. Even as her breath became shallow and the blood began to pool in her mouth, her love didn't falter for an instant. Her tears dried up, being replaced by contentment.
He gathered her tiny, frail body in his arms, holding her close. He wanted to rip out the knife and heal her, but a little voice, deep inside his mind, said that it wouldn't work. All he could do was rock the small child in his arms, lulling her into an endless sleep.
Then, he heard it.
Four words. Four impossible, unfathomable words.
He didn't believe them. He never would believe them. He chose not to believe that Daphne would say something so absurd. In this life and the next, he would only accept it as a hallucination brought about by the Witch Factor's corrupting influence.
But regardless of his denial, Daphne said it, and she meant it with all of her little heart.
"I l-love you…dad."
Daphne, the Witch of Gluttony, died in his arms with a smile on her face.
Author's Note: Hey, all. Sam here. I got some news, but I didn't want it to ruin the chapter, so I put it at the end.
I've started studying for two IT certifications in order to further my career. This takes multiple hours a night over the course of months. As much as I love writing this fic, I need to put my future first. I want a better job in my field so that my fiancée and I can have kids in a couple of years. Also, the wedding is coming up in October, and there's no way I can post when I need to focus on that.
As such, this will be the last chapter that I post for a while, likely until the end of this year or later. I'll still be writing, but instead of getting down a thousand words a night, I'll get a hundred if I'm lucky. I hate to do this, but I cannot be focused on writing, editing, and maintaining a schedule for an anime fanfiction when I have my family to think about.
You guys are great, and I look forward to seeing you all after the wedding.
