All characters that are from the TWILIGHT saga by Stephanie Meyer belong to Stephanie Meyer. All others belong to me. I do not receive profit for these stories except for the joyous enjoyment of reviews.

This story follows right after When I'm Gone: Third Installment to GONE Saga, so if you haven't read that one or the two before, please do.

The timeline of the story will coincide with Gabriel Michael Laskaris' growing up years, starting at Seth and Rosa's wedding day, April 12th and will progress from there.

AN: Here's the next chapter, as promised! Please, trust me...that's all I ask as y'all read through this chapter. I have it all planned out and believe me, it will be good.

Gaby -love you darling! Please don't hate me.

Chelsea, Blondie -thank you for your awesome reviews. Even when they're short, they still make me happy.

As usual, enjoy as you read (try to, at least) and review (I'll take the hits for this one willingly)

Chapter Thirty-Three

18 Years Ago, February 7th
Loutsa, Greece

the house was quiet as he closed the door behind him, "Lena! I'm home!"

He tossed his briefcase onto the couch even though he knew it would make his mother-in-law angry, eager to see his wife as he made his way towards the kitchen to get to the stairs that led to the third floor he shared with her.

"I'm in the kitchen."

He was scowling by the time he turned the corner into the kitchen, his scolding halfway through, "You're supposed to be on bed rest. Doctor Meta…what? Lena…"

She smiled at him, a bruised look in her blue-green eyes as she stood up, the blanketed bundle in her arms squirming, "He was born three days ago."

He stared at the tiny hand that waved into sight before disappearing into the blankets, soft sucking sounds filling the silence before he looked at her, "Three days ago?"

She nodded, moving closer so he could see his son for the first time, "I'm sorry you weren't here."

"Why didn't you call me?"

She looked up from her son's face, surprise on her own as a gold curl tumbled over her cheek to tangle in her long lashes, "Mana called you –she said you were too busy at the university to come."

"What," he shook his head, his gut twisting with anger –he knew Ileana's mother didn't like him, never had, but for her to blatantly lie about something as important as his son's birth –"She never called me, Lena. I called yesterday and she told me you were asleep and that everything was fine."

She sniffed, looking into her baby's bright blue eyes –identical to his father's –as she fought back tears of betrayal, finally looking up at him with a smile, "I'm sorry. I thought….do you want to hold him?"

He nodded, his heart squeezing painfully as she gently settled their baby into his arms, the light blond hair covering his tiny head soft against his fingertips as he slowly explored his face.

He felt it when his son's tiny fingers gripped his, felt his heart split open to let in a love bigger than himself, "What did you name him?"

"Nicolai…Nicolai Frederick Laskaris."

Hello Nicolai…I'm your father…

sweet high giggles filled the small living room, pudgy legs kicking as he tickled his round belly, baby Nic waving his arms as he gave his Daddy a toothless grin.

"I'm going to miss you, little man," he dipped his head to blow a raspberry on his round tummy, eliciting another round of giggles, "Don't do anything important while I'm gone, okay?"

The five month old gurgled in agreement, his big blue eyes bright as he waved his arms and legs, his entire body expressing the joy of having his father there…

he watched him toddle across the living room, holding a book in both hands, his little toes curled against the cool marbled floor, small white teeth showing as he placed the book on his lap, giving him a hopeful look, "Anag…anag…"

"You want me to read to you, uh," he set aside the paperwork he had been working on, looking up at the clock on the wall –he still had some hours before having to head back to the university.

Picking up the book, he lifted his one year old son onto his lap, smiling as the little boy cuddled into his side.

Halfway through the book, he looked down to find his son staring up at him, blue eyes studying his face before he shyly smiled…

he laughed as the two year old ran across the yard towards him, picking him up and swinging him around, "I missed you so much, Nico! Did you miss me?"

"Lots," Nic wrapped his arms around his father's neck as soon as he set him on his arm, "Landy played with me all week."

He laughed as he took out his briefcase and duffel bag from the trunk of the car, closing it with Nico's help before heading to the small house he shared with his wife and son, "You must have driven your mother crazy."

Nic giggled, his small head lying on his father's broad chest, "She said together we're worst than the Titans."

Having been witness to the trouble Nicolai and his cousin Lyandros could get into, he was in agreement…

he clung to his father's legs, small hands gripping the fabric of his pants as he gave him a pleading look, "Don't go, Daddy."

Setting the duffel bag into the opened trunk of his car, he picked up the four year old until they were looking eye to eye, "I have to go, buddy. But I promise you the week will go by fast and I'll be here before you can miss me."

"I always miss you," his bottom lip poked out as he tugged at the tie Daddy was wearing, hugging his neck as soon as he pulled him into a hug, his rumbling words meant to make him feel better, "I always miss you too but you know what?"

"What?"

He smiled into his son's blue eyes, reaching up to brush back the light blond hair from his small forehead, "I'm always thinking of you –every day. So it's like I have you with me all the time."

"I think of you every day too."

He smiled at his little boy, stroking his thumb over his baby soft cheek, "Then I'm with you every day…take care of your mother until I come back, okay?"

"Okay."

Giving him one last hug and kiss, he lowered him onto the ground, watching with a smile as the little boy turned to cling to his mother's legs…

the smell of burning flesh still hung in the air as he stood stock still, his eyes dry as he kept his jaw clenched tight, the wooden frame digging into his palm due to the force he held it with.

The mound of dirt at his feet was freshly turned, the quiet woods surrounding him somehow accompanying him in this painful moment but Rick didn't take comfort in that.

He had spent all morning and most of the day burying his family…

His grandmother Delia, always with a word of advice to offer…

Cousin Harmonia, always quick with a racy joke…

Nephew Elias, his sweet smiles all the sweeter due to the only two teeth he had…

Great Uncle Stavros, reminding him time and again how a man belonged beside his wife…

Amery…his sweet little sister…who had just fallen in love, for the fiftieth time…

His beautiful mother…

He had buried Ileana last, dying inside as he placed her into the cold hard ground, her beautiful face so still and pale, having been spared from the greedy fire by a collapsed wall.

And in her arms…

If only he'd been able to see Nicolai's face one last time…but he had been cursed in a way that completely obliterated the memories of love, happiness –the utter joy of his little boy…

Present Day, February 4th

Leah sucked in a sharp breath, her heart squeezing painfully as soon as she stepped into the living room.

The waves of grief and desolation rolling off of Rick nearly had her on her knees, a hand against the wall keeping her on her feet as she fought for control –she couldn't let herself be overwhelmed or she'd be leaving him alone in his emotional hell.

Moving across the living room towards the couch where he was sitting, she tucked her leg under her to sit sideways, her arms wrapping around his shoulders as he turned to lay his head on her shoulder, his eyes never leaving the picture framed in dark wood, his thumb rubbing the glass, "Today's his eighteenth birthday…I never got to see him grow into a man."

Stroking his hair, she pressed a kiss against the top of his head, her words soft as she tightened her arms around him, "He would have been a wonderful man…with you for a father –"

Rick shook his head, his hair tickling her throat, "I was a selfish man, Leah. Even with Ileana smoothing out the rough edges, I failed him in so many ways…"

"Rick –"

"I spent so little time with him," Rick closed his eyes, his long fingers tightening around the edges of the frame, "And now all I have of him is this…I found it in the rubbish left behind, the glass broken but the picture intact…it almost felt like a mockery."

The silence hung heavy between them, Rick closing his eyes as he let himself relax into her arms, her soft breath stirring the small hairs on the back of his neck.

"You never cried for him."

It wasn't a question but simply a statement made from knowing him for almost ten years.

"Some hurts are too deep…too raw…tears won't come…they won't heal…"

Pulling him tighter into her, she leaned back into the couch, Rick following until they laid together, the soft ticking sound of the clock the only sound in the small house.

Leah had given the construction workers a two hour break to put their children down for their naps, Gabe outside in his bicycle.

It was chaos in their home right now, the frame of the second level finally completed and the walls going up, the constant banging and cutting keeping the kids and Leah on edge.

Another few months and they would have their home back but for now, two hours a day of quiet and solitude would have to make due.

"All he knew was love, Rick," Leah rubbed his back, her jaw pressed against the back of his head as she shifted slightly to get comfortable under his heavy weight, "The love of his father and his mother, the love of his grandparents, his aunts and uncles, his cousins…he was such a lucky boy…even I love him even though I only know him through your memories."

Rick set the frame on the coffee table, turning until he was face to face, keeping his head on her chest as he wrapped his arms around her, "I love you, Lee. You and our children…"

"I know, baby," Leah kept stroking his hair, her arms around his shoulders, uncertain of how to help him with the pain still throbbing inside him, going with her gut as she softly asked, "What was it like? The first time you held him?"

"He was so small," Rick smiled against her shoulder, the memories flooding him as he let himself feel them for the first time in years, "Big blue eyes…hair so blond it was almost white…I was so scared…this little person, he was mine…my responsibility…my son. It was my job to care for him, love him –teach him the right path…I was supposed to protect him."

Hugging him tighter, she swallowed past the lump in her throat, her voice husky, "You did the best you could, Rick."

He fought back the pain flooding him without success, a tear breaking free to roll down his cheek and drip onto Leah's neck, "I could have done better."

And the dam broke, his body shaking as the tears kept coming, Leah holding on to him as she cried with him.

It seemed like an eternity before the tears abated, Rick's tense body slowly relaxing against hers, his voice hoarse as he whispered tiredly, "Don't leave me."

"Never, baby," Leah whispered into his hair, feeling the exhaustion he was feeling –to have let himself break and release that much pain was tiring, to say the least, "I'll never leave you."

As the minutes ticked by, they both slowly succumbed to sleep, the soft ticking of time the only sound in the small house for the next hour and a half.


Brindisi, Italy
February 23rd

OMG! They're Engaged!
February Edition

To all you Lian Young –July Star fans, have we got some news for you!

They're engaged!

Check out the close up of her left hand –the picture was taken at the Staples Center when they walked the red carpet for the Grammy Awards Ceremony on February 10th.

July Star looked beautiful in a red off-the-shoulder dress that hugged her slim curves, the hem falling in a diagonal line that ended mid-calf, red Jimmy Choo stilettos making her legs look long and sleek.

Her long red-brown hair was a waterfall of curves over her right shoulder, displaying a backless view of the dress, giving her an all around glamorous look.

Lian Young –well, most of you ladies know that man looks hot in anything.

To see him in a well-tailored Hugo Boss suit, the top button of his white shirt undone and no tie in sight probably fueled a lot of fantasies in many a girl's head but as it is obvious, the only one letting this man be boss from now on will be July Star.

The ring is reported to be a multi-faceted two carat diamond, the silver band a-symmetrical yet elegant, three fourth carat diamonds embedded along the slim band –it is indeed a unique ring for a unique girl.

Sources have it Young flew Star all the way to Ireland to propose at the turn of the new year…what a wonderful way to start the year, don't you think?

The Hollywood Reporter was able to snag the happy couple for a few seconds before they disappeared into the Staples Center.

When asked about the ring, Young grinned as he looked at Star, "She's made me the happiest man on earth."

They have yet to set a date.

As for the awards –they snagged a combined total of nine Grammys!

Their duo CD –released last November –won Best Record of the Year, the cover song 'Give Into Me' snagging Song of the Year.

Star raked in two Grammys of her own as Female Vocalist of the Year and Songwriter of the Year while Young got himself Best Male Country Vocal Performance, Best Country Performance and Best Country Song ('Come Over' release last March) –he graciously lost Songwriter of the Year to his fiancée.

Their duo video for 'Give Into Me' won Video of the Year while Young's newly released video, ''Til My Last Day' got him Best Concept Music Video.

If ever there was a power couple in the music business, these two are it –good thing they seem to have as much love between them as they have fame, money and talent.

From all your fans, we wish both of them the best –they are obviously made for each other.

Congratu –

The newsprint crumbled in her hands, manicured nails tearing through the smiling faces as she let out a frustrated scream, "That damn bastard!"

Tossing the crumbled tabloid into the trash can beside her vanity, she yanked a wet wipe and rubbed her hands clean as the bedroom door opened, her green eyes flashing as she turned to glare at him.

Raising an eyebrow, he removed his jacket, his dark hair tousled, "You're going to get wrinkles before your time if you keep frowning like that."

Tossing the used wipe into the trash can, she stood up, the silk robe she wore over her nightgown brushing the floor, "I can't believe he actually proposed to her…that damn bitch actually has him believing in love again."

He chuckled as he moved into the large walk-in closet, his voice carrying into the large master bedroom, "Did you actually think you did so much damage he would never be willing to discover what love truly is?"

"That was my intent," moving across the floor, she stood before the bedroom window, the rolling hills of the Italian villa she had bought with her first alimony check stretching for miles, "Every money grabbing whore he was with assured me I had succeeded but this one…this one's different."

"As in, she's not a money grabbing whore," he walked out, wearing pajama bottoms and nothing else, "July Star has her own money –she has no need for your ex's."

"And yet, she's going to be getting it," turning, she leaned against the window, arms crossed over her chest as she watched him pull back the comforter and sheets of the bed they shared, "As soon as they're declared husband and wife, I'm screwed."

"Yes, darling, you are," he piled his pillows against the headboard before getting into bed, pulling out a book from the bedside drawer, "And now, your meal ticket's going to expire. I told you to be smart about the money you were getting but you didn't listen."

"Your job was to get me that money," she stomped her foot, moving across the bed to yank back the covers from her side of the bed, "I don't understand why you didn't find a way to get rid of that ridiculous marriage clause."

"The judge was willing to go only so far," he kept his eyes on his book, turning a page before he spoke again, "You could have bled him dry and let it go but you wanted to be permanently wedged into his life –amusing, isn't it? Now it's coming to bite you in the ass."

She let out a low growl, tossing a pillow at him, her anger rising as he simply batted it aside, "If you think I'm just going to sit back and do nothing, you've got something else coming."

"I don't care either way as long as you don't tell me," he finally looked up, his grey eyes expressing boredom over her tantrum, "As your lawyer, I do need to advise you that any premeditated planning can and will be discovered."

She let out a deep breath, sitting on the side of the bed as she stared out the window, her shoulders slumping, "I actually thought…when I first met him, I thought I could love him…I thought I could be one of those women able to give herself completely to a man…"

"People like us don't love, Camille," he turned the page, his eyes moving over the words, "We are takers, not givers –the reason why you and I work so well together…we never expect anything from each other."

Her chin dropped to her chest, her eyes on her hands as they hung limply between her knees, "Because we don't deserve anything…"

"Stop being so melodramatic," he closed the book, setting it on the bedside table before reaching across the bed and fisting his hand into her long blond hair, pulling her back until she laid with her head on his lap, "You now know what the problem is –find a way to fix it…or stop bitching."

"There will be no wedding," her jaw tightened as he undid the belt of her robe to pull it open, "Unless he has made arrangements for his half of his money, it should all go to me if something happens to him."

"Whatever you're planning, darling," he leaned down to lick her bottom lip, "You're on your own…I only come into the picture when it's time to tell you to shut up."

Reaching up, she grabbed a fistful of his dark hair, slamming his mouth down on hers, their tongues demanding control from each other, neither giving in.

"Fuck me," she growled, a gasp escaping her as he yanked at the neck of her gown, the delicate straps snapping.

"Of course," he grabbed her jaw, turning her head as he pulled his pajamas down, "It is the only thing you know, after all…well, fucking and money."

Her thoughts spun as she opened for him, his hands fisted in her hair as he used her mouth.

The wedding couldn't happen –it wasn't going to happen.

Of that, she would make sure.