As much as I enjoyed this arc, I'm relieved that this chapter brings it to an end. Finally, it all comes full circle, and we get back to our Subaru.

…I say that, but I've been excited about this chapter for a long time.

Special thanks to my wife for editing this chapter.

The Sage, Part 2

Whispered conversations followed him at every turn.

"Did you hear? They say a mountain was built in the north."
"Built? Nah, you're crazy."
"I'm serious! It was made with magic!"

Two middle-aged men, drunk in a tavern, discussed the flurry of events that had swept the nation. Neither quite believed what they were saying, let alone what their drinking partner was claiming.

"Magic? Fie! Devil's work, you mean! That's what th-the Witch of Envy used!"
"It's also how the Sage sealed her away!"
"The Sage…Wait a minute, that reminds me—the W-Witch was a silver-haired half-elf, right?"
"Wait, you're not trying to say—she can't be the Sorceress, right?"

A hand fell on each of their shoulders. They jolted and whirled around, facing what could only be described as a skeleton with skin. No expression, no light in the eyes—not even a pulse was present. The being in front of them was as dead as can be. Despite all that, the two men perfectly understood the unspoken threat.

Subaru lifted his hands off the two men, making his way to the front of the tavern. He hoped that no one else had made the connection between Envy and Satella, though he knew that was unlikely. He'd need to act quickly if he wanted to save her reputation.

He sat down at the bar, requesting their strongest drink available. Next to him, hunched over the countertop, another man spoke. "It won't help you forget about what happened. It's not nearly strong enough."

Subaru barely turned his head. "How would you know? You've barely taken a sip."

The man leaned back a bit, exposing half a dozen empty glasses. He gave a thin smile as if asking, "Do you wish to retract that statement?"

Subaru tossed a gold piece onto the countertop before downing his own drink. He didn't even feel a buzz. "You really need a better role model, Geuse."

Petelgeuse Romanée-Conti—in a new body but undoubtedly the same spirit—shook his head slowly. "Perhaps not in recent months," he tentatively agreed, "but I am loath to forget who you once were—your true self, if I may be so bold."

Subaru looked down at himself. He didn't feel the motion of his head. "Today, I am more myself than I have ever been."

Geuse's somber expression fell further. "I had my suspicions when I heard tales of the landscape rapidly changing, but to see it myself…You have taken in the Od Laguna, haven't you?"

Subaru inclined his head in acknowledgment. "It's more of a permanent connection, I'd say."

"One that your body was not prepared for. It has destroyed you, both physically and mentally."

"I lost my mind a long time ago."

"I disagree. Back then, you were a lost man that life had beaten down. Now, you are close to a dead man."

A blunt statement. Subaru only partially agreed. "I'm not dead yet."

Geuse grimaced."I implore you to keep it that way. I don't think that Shaula could survive without you."

Subaru tightened his hand around his newly-filled glass. He hadn't thought about Shaula in weeks.

Geuse picked up on this. "This is what I am referring to, Master. You are not yourself anymore. If I may be crass—and I do not believe that you will mind in your current state—you are incomplete. You tried to reclaim the Od Laguna—to become the Sage in full."

"And that didn't work. I'm aware."

"It worked just fine. However, your body and mind were unprepared, so you are not fully in control."

"As I said, it didn't work."

They say in silence for a while, with Geuse brooding and Subaru musing. Out of nowhere, Geuse said, "I forgive you."

Subaru blinked. "You shouldn't."

"Perhaps I am," Geuse agreed, "yet I cannot bring myself to blame you."

"You're enabling me."

"I'm merely seeing the nuances of the situation."

Subaru took a sip of his drink. "You're putting blind faith into a madman."

"I see only a grieving husband searching to reclaim what was lost."

"I killed my daughter."

The dullness in Subaru's voice caused Geuse to flinch, but his stance didn't change too drastically. "Let me rephrase my original statement. I do not forgive you. However, I forgive Master Flugel for becoming you."

In only a few days, Subaru had lost the ability to understand the difference. He forcibly changed the subject. "The world has been made anew," he said. His eyes lost their focus. "It is on the path to healing. Upon my return, few traces of the Witch of Envy's attack will remain."

Geuse shifted uncomfortably at the word "return," but he put the implications of why a return would be needed out of his mind. He dared not interrupt the Od Laguna when it spoke through the Sage.

However, it seemed that nothing more was going to be said. It was a message of hope and nothing more. A simple, "Things will get better in time."

Subaru returned to awareness and slapped down a few more gold pieces, paying for Geuse's drinks, as well. "We're going to the Tower," he said, his tone brooking no argument.

"Not the mansion?" Geuse asked.

Subaru shook his head. "It has been reclaimed by its original owner."

Geuse jolted a bit. "Echidna? She's still alive?"

"Of course not," Subaru said. The corresponding Witch Factor let out a tinkling laugh as if she knew something that he didn't. "It originally belonged to the Mathers Family. The current head, Roswaal, moved in during my absence. So, I snuck in, sent all of our belongings to the Tower, and now, I'm here."

Hesitation appeared on Subaru's face—the most emotion that he had shown during their entire encounter aside from the mention of Shaula. "I saw Beatrice," he said. His tone of voice remained the same. "She was reading in the library, though she was on the stool instead of her favorite chair. I almost went up to say hi, but…"

A slight grimace. It was quickly wiped away. Without another word, they appeared in the Tower.

Shaula instantly tackled him in a hug, squealing in joy and sending them both to the ground.

His head slammed against the stone floor. He didn't feel any pain.

"Master! Master's back, yup! Didn't you say you'd be gone for like, three seconds?! It's been days, and I've been sooo booored! Oooh, oooh, I know, I know! We should make another Master Tree, yup! Oooh, Geuse is back! Hiya, Geuse! How are you?! Did'ya miss me?"

Geuse gave a fond smile and filled in for Subaru's silence. "I missed you dearly, Shaula."

She beamed, got off Subaru, and hugged Geuse. For a microsecond, Subaru's lips twitched upwards at the sight.

It all went away when Shaula turned back and asked, "So, did you bring back Mother yet? This game of hide-and-seek is waaay too long, yup!"

Subaru scowled. Geuse stiffened.

"Shaula," the spirit said carefully, "did Master Flugel tell you anything about Miss Daphne?"

"I did," Subaru said coolly, standing up and dusting himself off. "I said that I murdered her."

Shaula's smile wavered, so she forced it back up. "That's just silly, yup! Master sucks at jokes, but I'll pretend to laugh, kay? Haha! Haha! Come on, Geuse! Let's laugh at Master's stupid meanie humor! Haha!"

She stood in the entryway of the Pleiades Watchtower, laughing alone to an audience of a depressed spirit and a frustrated Sage.

Only Geuse went to comfort her when her laughs began to hide her tears.


Time passed. Nothing much happened.

Slowly but surely, society was rebuilding itself, as they moved to explore the new territory. Hope began to fill the grieving, though fear of the Witch only increased.

Subaru, on the other hand, decayed further.

If he were a shell of a man before, now, he was a husk. Shaula clung to him, but he brushed her off. He left Geuse to comfort her.

He wondered why it didn't bother him. Even when he had fallen so far, he still felt sad. Now, he…Well, he didn't know. He felt twinges of anger and frustration and grief, but it didn't drive him to take any actions. He just stayed on the same path that he started out on.

He wondered how much of this was caused by the Od Laguna and how much was the weight of his own failures.

He visited Daphne's grave. He didn't say anything.

His heart ached. He was surprised that he still had a heart. It had not pulsated in days.

He looked down at his daughter's headstone and placed his right hand over his heart. Still no pulse, despite the pain. His skin was frigid, just like the Witch of Envy.

He had Witch Factors, and he was a being of sin. Was he a Witch?

"Warlock," Hector had said. Simply a male Witch. A cursed being. A life of unfulfillment. Unending sorrow. That sounded like Subaru, but he couldn't use an Authority. He had Witch Factors inside of him, yet he didn't have the one upside.

He was still useless.

Maybe in his next life, he'd be worth something.


He closed another Book of the Dead. He pushed aside the new voice in his head. This one was yet another Witch. Her experience with Witch Factors helped him understand them further.

Of course, he still remembered what the Od Laguna had told him. He needed the Authority of Envy to eradicate the Witch of Envy while preserving Satella's soul. Still, he needed to make sure that he was doing things properly. This time, however, he wasn't going to rely on a stranger's bold claims.

At that moment, Shaula interrupted him by hopping into the room with a massive smile on her face. "Heya, Master! So, are you gonna bring back Mother today?"

Subaru's fists clenched. He said nothing.

"Wh-what about that Other lady? The one you said that I can't talk about—"

"Then why are you?"

His cold words made her flinch. "B-but I'm not saying how we're—"

"Save it. I don't want to hear you speak about…the Sorceress."

Even after weeks, he still couldn't say his own wife's name.

Shaula folded in on herself. "O-oh…W-well, when, um, you, me, Mother, and—um, when we're all together again, then I can talk all I want, right?"

"Or you can shut up right now."

Shaula flinched back as if struck. Something deep inside Subaru twisted painfully at that, but it was overwhelmed by the entity that had replaced him.

Shaula left with tears in her eyes, presumably to go find Geuse, but it was clear that she hadn't given up on Subaru.

Every day, she asked him where Daphne was. She recounted how much fun they used to have. She spoke of how weird their family tree was and how it always made her giggle. She reminded him of when he had said that he loved her.

Subaru closed another Book of the Dead and walked away.

In the dying firelight, he drank alone. The alcohol didn't affect him anymore.

Geuse joined him. They drank together. It didn't quench the pain. He didn't know if he felt pain anymore.

Subaru observed what his glass reflected, carefully avoiding his own visage. He remembered what he had promised Queen Fallyn regarding trade routes, communication lines, and the economy. He had not fulfilled it yet.

"You love to help people, right, Geuse?

Geuse frowned. "I refuse to consider my meager actions as something so useful, but yes, I do like seeing the unfortunate become…ah, more fortunate."

"How kind of you," Subaru said flatly. He meant what he said. "There are currently hundreds of towns and millions of people that are in dire need of your help."

With a bit of guidance from the Od Laguna, which pointed out any towns that he was unaware of, Subaru laid out a path for Geuse to follow. It should be satisfactory for the coming months to help with supplies and communication.

Subaru paused. There was another settlement that was more important to him than even the Capital.

"Elior Forest," he said. "You remember it, don't you? The place where we sealed Hector."

"Where you sealed Hector," Geuse corrected.

"I'll admit, I half-expected you to say something about how the past me was the one who did it."

"To be quite frank with you, I am tired of contemplating the difference. Master Flugel is Master Flugel."

Subaru tilted his head, idly noting how that was something that Shaula would say. "And that's fine with you?"

Geuse thought for a moment. "Perhaps it is merely my nature as a spirit, but I cannot bring myself to be angry at you for long. There is always a reason behind your actions, and I truly believe that you would have stopped yourself before you went too far."

A feeling bubbled in Subaru's chest. It was dull, but the occurrence was rare enough nowadays that it threatened to overwhelm him.

It wasn't warmth at Geuse's loyalty—rather, it was shame for his actions and disappointment that Geuse only stuck around because of his "nature as a spirit."

"Geuse…how the hell did I not already go too far?"

Geuse frowned. "As I said—"

"It's difficult to blame me, yes. That's fucking stupid." Subaru took another drink. He tossed the glass to the side, shattering it against the wall. He poured himself another glass. "I crossed the point of no return weeks ago, and you admitted that I've turned into a monster. What actually changed?"

Geuse said nothing, electing to instead unfocus his eyes and gaze at something intangible within Subaru.

'It's the Od Laguna,' Subaru realized, thinking of Geuse's piety. The more Geuse reprimanded Subaru's actions, the more it must have felt like accusing his god of being wrong.

Subaru didn't have the energy to argue. He knew that his actions were his own.

Geuse, on the other hand, believed that Subaru—if he were acting like his old self—would have backed down at the most pivotal moment. Yet, when he had to make his decision, Subaru had chosen to slide a dagger between Daphne's ribs. He had pierced her small, youthful heart, cutting her future short.

He couldn't understand how Geuse could live in such powerful denial.

Subaru took another long gulp of his drink despite knowing how futile it was to try and get drunk. "Back to Elior…There's another reason why it's important, as you know."

"The vessel," Geuse said quietly. "I will admit that I think about her often."

Subaru did, too, though likely not as wistfully as Geuse did.

"I have already failed Sa—the Sorceress," Subaru said, once again cursing his inability to utter her name. "Were it not for our contract, I would have failed her other half, too."

"That's not true," Geuse insisted. "You would have stopped yourself."

A hollow, rattling sound came out of Subaru—a skeleton's laughter, merely imitating the emotions of the living. "When my wife was involved, I had no self-restraint. The lives of others were mere surgical tools, but I had no medical degree."

What was he even saying? Was he trying to be profound? Or was this just another one of his speeches about how shitty he was? He should know by now that self-awareness was not a form of repentance. Nothing could allow him to repent.

There was no such thing as true atonement for murder. Regardless, he would spend every moment making up for it.

…In his next life, that is. This life was merely…preparation.

With that, he set more events in motion.

"Of all the places that you will assist, Elior Forest will undoubtedly be the most important. I need you to keep an eye on the Seal. I doubt that it'll get weaker, but we can't risk it. If it did, and Hector wanted to, he might be able to break out on his own. We're lucky that he seems to have no desire to do anything besides lay down and die."

Come to think of it, if Hector had no will to act, why had he caused mindless devastation?

"To bait you out," Hector had said. And yet, when they had finally met, Hector didn't do anything. He just…waited for death.

"But she won't let me die," Hector had said.

Who was "she"? Who could cast such powerful protection magic? Aside from Satella, of course, but she hadn't done anything like that. Then again, Satella had hidden the vessel's existence from him. What other secrets was she hiding?

Subaru shook his head to clear it. He needed to focus. "Make sure the Seal holds," he continued. "The elves will help, but I'm counting on you to keep tabs on it."

He took a deep breath. "And…look after…after her soul. Please. It's not…her, not really, but…"

"It will be done," Geuse said, causing Subaru to sigh in relief. "I will make sure to provide detailed reports."

Subaru paused. "You may tell me when I return," he said at length, causing Geuse to stiffen. "I'll be…absent for a little while, but I'll come back as soon as possible."

That led to his next set of instructions. Geuse was to find those who remembered Satella's good deeds and form an organization in her honor that was dedicated to helping people. They would aid in healing the world after the Calamity.

The reasoning was two-fold. One, it would guarantee that Satella's name would be further separated from the Witch of Envy. Sure, it was mere rumors now, but he wouldn't risk it. He refused to let anyone ruin her reputation.

The other reason was to grab Subaru's attention when he came back. He would undoubtedly not remember his past life—or current life, depending on the perspective. However, his contract with Satella helped guarantee that his feelings for her would persist in his soul. He'd naturally want to find out more, leading him to Geuse. From there, he'd learn of the Tower and the Books of the Dead. He made sure that Geuse would pass on that information "in case something happens to my memory."

Of course, when he spoke of his contract with Satella, he wasn't referring to the one where she said that she would bring him back. He meant the one that was made after she had confronted him about the Ordeal.

"I swear on the Od Laguna that I will love you forever. In this life and the next, our souls will find one another."

How convenient.

Even without that contract, he suspected that he would remember his love for her. Somehow, he knew that there was a part of him, inherent to his very soul, that remembered the people most important to him, whether he liked them or not. It wasn't just him going insane—it was the Od Laguna's power. The more he resembled his past incarnation, the more he remembered specific people. Take Trisha, for example. He didn't know her at all, yet her mere existence had angered him. Her words implied that he had quarreled with the Oni God in a past life.

He drummed his fingers on the table, turning his attention inwards. There was a light in his soul that wasn't driving out the darkness of the Witch Factors—rather, it was helping him accept them into himself. The Od Laguna, shining brightly, projected knowledge into his mind once more.

Out loud, he spoke to Geuse in a monotone voice. "Do not stay in the forest for more than twenty-four hours. Do not look upon the perfect vessel."

He didn't know what would happen if those rules were violated, but he knew that it wouldn't be good.

He finished giving his instructions to Geuse, who remained as attentive as ever. Some details were small, like not using the name "Flugel" to refer to the Sage. Some were critical, like harvesting the Witch Factors so that Subaru may receive them upon his return.

That last one worried Geuse quite a bit, but he didn't question anything.

When he finished, Subaru plainly said, "Entrapment. That's what this is, isn't it? I'm giving you a fate that you never asked for."

"I disagree," Geuse said. "It is my duty. I would be honored to follow your will, Master Flugel."

How fickle. Not long ago, Geuse had condemned Subaru, and rightfully so. Now, Geuse was feeling pity for the lost soul before him.

They sat in silence for a while. Geuse held an internal vigil for those that had passed. Subaru took a break from his own perpetual mourning to stave off the voices of Witches long dead. The Books were dangerous to read—he knew that—but they were useful. He should have read them sooner. Going by the information from both those and the Od Laguna itself, it seemed that he would be able to use an Authority of Lust to stave off Satella's malady, even without fixing her soul. There was no guarantee that his version of the Authority would fit the bill, but it was something.

He grimaced as Carmilla pointed out that her Authority of Lust wasn't remotely related to healing. Still, Subaru wasn't deterred.

'I'm not changing my plans,' he told her. 'All you're doing is bumming me out.'

'Aren't y-you, um, p-pretty sad already?'

'Yes, but you're making it worse.'

Sekhmet sighed, as expected. 'Now, that's just mean…haah…Wasn't killing her enough? You don't…haah…have to be cruel as well…haah…'

He shrugged. He didn't bother to respond. Instead, he amused himself with thoughts of his imminent death. It wasn't morbid—not really. Actually, it was quite funny considering the company that he held. Geuse, who believed in Subaru's goodness no matter what, had a name borne of sorrow and hopelessness.

"Betelgeuse Romaneé-Conti," he said, breaking the silence.

Geuse stiffened. "It's Petelgeuse."

Ah, yes. Satella was never great at naming things. It was fairly expected that she would try to name Geuse something ridiculous like "Pimsy," and it was even less surprising that Geuse would place such importance on the lingering "P" sound.

Did Geuse view the rest of his name as equally significant? If he did, then he may as well learn where it came from.

From Orion, since Subaru loved a woman of silver. From his Hand, Betelgeuse, since Subaru was a killer.

But this was long before Subaru had committed unspeakable horrors to his loved ones. No, this was a selfish act.

Subaru had taken his own life.

At least, he thought that he had. Considering the cosmic events that had happened immediately after he pulled the trigger, his recollection of it was a bit fuzzy. Still, it wouldn't surprise him if he was some kind of ghost or a zombie. He certainly felt like one.

Regardless, it truly was cruel of him, wasn't it? Geuse had been cherishing the life that he had been given, yet Subaru had named him after death.

He explained that to Geuse, expecting hatred and disgust. Geuse did none of those things. Perhaps Subaru hadn't explained it well enough.

He spoke of Romaneé-Conti. His homeland's finest, most expensive beverage. The world's parting gift to him.

Geuse still didn't harbor any distaste for his "Master." He merely felt pity.

Was Subaru being too subtle? He had lost most of his communication skills, but surely, Geuse could understand this, right? Geuse was named after murder, yet he sat there with sympathy in his eyes.

It was frustrating.

Subaru tensed, downing another glass. He said a few more words about why Geuse was named in such a way. The frustration boiled over.

"You will fail in your task," he said. "The Hand of Orion will bring ruin to this land, just as I have."

Geuse likely thought that this was another premonition. It wasn't.

Geuse walked away, deeply disturbed. Subaru felt relieved.

It was nice to finally be condemned. He could only hope that his next life brought more retribution.


It was a fairly large room. Circular. Plain. It was once a sitting room, but Daphne had eaten all of the furniture. Since then, it had become nothing more than a level between staircases.

Now, it was an arena.

Subaru placed a Book of the Dead in the center of the floor and stepped back. He waited a moment, and a familiar figure manifested above it.

He was a man in his early twenties with long, red hair cascading down to his waist. He didn't have a sword. He wore an eye patch, but Subaru knew that there was nothing wrong with his vision.

This was the spirit—or more accurately, an imprint—of a younger Reid Astrea.

Reid glared at Subaru. "Th'fuck're ya lookin' at, little fish?"

Subaru raised an eyebrow at the moniker. He reminded himself that this wasn't the Reid that he knew, so he hadn't gained any respect. He was still a "little fish."

"I'm looking at your eye patch," he said. "Why are you wearing that?"

Reid smirked. "'Cause it looks cool as fuck."

Subaru gave Reid a blank look. "You're chuuni," he deadpanned. "Huh."

Reid's expression darkened. "Th'hell is tha' supposed t'mean? Is 'chooney' some kinda swear I don't know? Look, ya prick. I know every swear. Ya can't insult me without me knowin' 'bout it, got it?"

"Duly noted," Subaru said drily. "You know, I liked the older you better, but don't tell him I said that."

Reid pulled out his chopsticks and fiddled with them. "I ain't got a clue what yer sayin', so imma go…I dunno, find some hotties. See ya never, little fish."

He walked to the door and tried to open it. He couldn't. A thin veil of magic—keyed directly to Reid—prevented him from progressing.

He sent a quick glare at Subaru before swiping at the door with his chopsticks, trying to cut through the barrier. He couldn't.

"Th'fuck is this?!" he yelled. His voice wavered slightly. "Wha', d'ya think ya can trap Reid Astrea?!"

"Of course not," Subaru said. His matter-of-fact demeanor and lack of expression made Reid shift uncomfortably. "I ended up being a match for Reid, but the real deal would still cut through my magic, flip me off, and leave."

Reid narrowed his eyes. "I jus' tried tha', ya cunt. An' whaddya mean, 'the real deal?'"

"Well, the real deal wouldn't agree to guard this room for more than an hour, tops. But you? You'll be here as long as I need."

A vein throbbed in Reid's forehead. "I'll ask ya one more time, ya prick…What the fuck are you talking about?"

Subaru circled around Reid, eyeing him like a hawk. "You're not real," he explained. "You're an imprint. A knockoff. A fake. Your strength is nothing compared to the true Reid Astrea."

For the first time, Reid was utterly speechless.

Subaru reached a hand out and pushed against Reid's shoulder. Reid stumbled back to the center of the room, not putting up any resistance in the face of such a revelation.

"You come from the Od Laguna," Subaru said. "You're nothing but a Book of the Dead. You're under my jurisdiction. You only have a body because I'm letting you have a body. As such, you're going to do what I need you to do, got it?"

Dumbfounded, Reid said nothing. His chopsticks fell loosely into his open fingers.

Pointing to the staircase at the far side of the room—which led to the Taygeta Library—Subaru continued speaking. "Some people will try to go up there. The knowledge within is dangerous. They're only allowed inside if they beat you in a fight."

It wasn't simply a matter of strength. Magic would do nothing against Reid, even if his Concept Cut had been somewhat nerfed. One could only beat him in a swordfight.

"And not just anyone can do that, can they? It would take some serious mental fortitude."

Anyone who reads a Book of the Dead has a chance of going insane. Because of that, only someone with unshakeable resolve would be allowed to get through.

Maybe that would be Subaru's next incarnation. Maybe that would be one of his companions. Whoever it was, it sure wouldn't be anyone that he didn't want up there.

"Goodbye, Reid. I'll relieve you from your duties when I return."

With that, Subaru left, leaving a furious Reid in his new prison.


It was done.

The Trials had been set.

The qualifications to take the Trials were to cross Sand Time while avoiding Shaula.

The First Trial was a test of knowledge. Only a denizen of Earth that had Subaru's interests could pass it.

The Second Trial was a test of willpower. Subaru needed to make sure that he had the mental fortitude required to handle his current self's memories. If he did, then he could take his mantle as Satella's savior.

Overcoming the Second Trial would Grant him access to his memories, but that wasn't enough. If he were to free Satella, he would need to be powerful.

The Third Trial was a test of strength.

Reid's Trial could be viewed as a test of power, yes, but it was multifaceted. For all of his coarse behavior, Reid was actually quite intelligent when it came to battle. There was more at play than just power.

That was not the case with Volcanica.

The Divine Dragon sat atop the Watchtower, its steadfast gaze not wavering from the endless sand. Those who would dare confront it would face down a god.

In its current state, Volcanica was a primal force of nature. Communication with it was sorely lacking. It had its two contracts with Subaru and Fallyn as well as the drive to protect Satella, but that was it.

There were no other motivations. Its pride was not a factor. It simply waited to perform its duty.

If Subaru defeated Volcanica in his next life, he would become the master of the Tower, just as he was now. If he became the master of the Tower, he could manipulate Sand Time to grant him access to Satella's seal.

Three Trials. A Witch's Trials. A Warlock's Trials.

A Sage's Trials.

He knew that the situation that he was in was messy. So many things needed to go right. He needed to die, get reincarnated, be brought back by Satella, go to the Tower, regain his memories, and—last but most certainly not least—eliminate the Witch of Envy while saving Satella.

It was as close to impossible as it could get…but it was the best that he could do.

This was planned. This was thought-out. He knew how the reincarnation cycle worked. He knew that his soul would be born again on Earth, albeit one parallel to his original universe. He knew that Satella would still be connected to him via their contract and—eventually—their shared Witch Factor of Envy. He knew that she could bring him back to Lugunica. He knew how to stop the Witch of Envy.

He knew how to save Satella.

As he mused, he stood on one of the balconies of the Tower, resting his arms against the wall. He leaned forward, as he gazed out across the infinite expanse of sand.

To the lower-right of his vision, Satella's seal—practically a shrine to her—was blocked off by a particularly thick spot of Sand Time. Only by passing the Third Trial could one gain access to the main chamber, and even then, they'd need all of the Authorities to break the seal of shadows.

"Meaning only I can get through."

That was the important part. As unfathomable as it was, he knew that there would be some doomsday cult that wanted to bring about the destruction of the world. They'd deem the Witch of Envy to be the proper means to do it.

That wasn't a prophecy. It was just his cynical view of humanity.

"Though I like to think of it as realism. It's all so…predictable."

Or maybe he was projecting his own destructive tendencies unto others. It was difficult to tell.

He gripped the balcony's railing, turning his knuckles white. He leaned forward again, perfectly prepared to end his life, to kill himself, to toss himself off the building—

His vision blurred. His hands shook.

He had been mutilated, both by his own hand and others'. Day in and day out, he experienced pain beyond belief.

He never got used to it.

As he lifted a foot up, placing it on the edge of the wall, he asked a question to no one in particular.

His voice wavered. His eyes burned.

"…Will it hurt?"

Someone answered.

"It depends on how you go about it."

A cold presence appeared beside him, but he didn't flinch. If anything, he was surprised that she hadn't come earlier.

Pandora, letting her silver hair sway in a non-existent wind, stood by his side. He couldn't tell if she was smiling.

"You will not feel much at this height," she murmured. "A pinch, maybe."

She dragged her finger over the back of her neck, between the bottom of her skull and the crest of her spine. "Try and let this be your point of impact. Your sympathetic nervous system will be destroyed, so you will not feel any pain."

She leaned over the edge. She was more in danger of falling than he was. "Then again," she continued idly, pointing to the sand below, "this area is not ideal. The sand might cushion your fall, leading to a more drawn-out end. I'd recommend moving to the other side of the balcony. You would land on stone."

"…Ah. Duly noted."

She beamed. He grimaced.

"You're strange, Pandora. I don't know anyone else who would offer advice on the best way to kill themselves."

She shrugged. "Your life will end either way. You may as well make it painless."

"How kind of you."

Silence fell upon them. Subaru swung his legs over the balcony's edge and walked to the other side, keeping Pandora's advice about the stone in mind.

He stopped walking at the halfway point. "Before I go, I need you to answer a question."

She smiled thinly. "Oh? I can do that for you. Curiosity is—"

"How do you know about the nervous system?"

Her smile fell.

"Lugunica doesn't bother studying biology," he said, "only water magic. That's all they need. You've always known more than you should, but this? You'd have to be…Are you…

"Are you like me, Pandora?"

Pandora stared at him for a moment. Slowly, she raised her hand up, seemingly to clench it into a fist. With a pensive look, she let it fall to her side.

She said nothing.

He frowned. "In my eyes, silence is incriminating. You know what I'm talking about."

She hesitated. "I do." Her hand went up again. She put it back down. "I was not born on Earth."

"…But you know about it. How?"

She averted her eyes. Her voice became small.

"You told me about it," she murmured. She frowned and ran her fingers across her scalp. "Hm. My apologies for digressing. Let us try this again."

"What are you—"

She closed her fist, and her smile returned.


"…Will it hurt?"

"Not at all, my treasured one. I will make sure of it."

Subaru closed his eyes. "Pandora. What, do you have another monologue for me?"

She covered her mouth with the back of her hand, stifling a stiff giggle. "I do have the tendency to prattle on, hm? I must have picked that up from a certain someone."

"And that someone is me?"

"Ah, self-awareness. Truly mag—"

"Shut up."

She kept smiling.

"You know what I'm about to do," he said. She always seemed to know everything. "Do you really think that I want to spend my final moments with you?"

She gave an exaggerated pout, covering her heart with both hands. "Why, my treasured one, you wound me! Is it not a human's humble dream to die peacefully, surrounded by loved ones?"

"If you were human, you'd know that this situation doesn't match what you're saying at all." He eyed her warily. "Actually…are you human?"

She sure as hell didn't act like one.

She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "I am…mostly human," she admitted. "Alas, that is ancient history. Who I was then and who I am now are two different people."

Subaru grimaced. "Kindred souls, I guess. Maybe being with you isn't the worst way to go."

He turned to face the sand once more, completely missing the myriad of emotions that flew across her face.

They were silent for a while. Subaru didn't know what was keeping him there, sitting on the edge of the balcony. Was it fear of the unknown? A lack of resolve?

He gripped the stone. It dug into his skin.

Even though he had made his decision, it wasn't easy to take those final steps.

A single movement would end it all. Moving had never been so difficult.

Thin, fragile arms wrapped around his neck. He stiffened from the cold.

"Do not fear," Pandora whispered. "Death is merely the beginning of an even greater journey."

He tried to relax in her grip. It felt wrong. He was supposed to be the one comforting her.

Yet there he was.

A long pause followed.

"…I'm scared, Pandora," he whispered. She gripped him tighter. "I d-don't want to die."

It hurt to admit. He didn't know if her cold embrace was helping or hurting him.

"Only a monster could stare death in the eyes without faltering," she whispered.

"I am a monster."

"Do not think like that," she scolded gently. "Despite everything that you have been through, you are still you."

"I'm not sure that's a good thing."

"It is a wonderful thing, my treasured one."

He took a deep breath, savoring it. If he moved, all sensation would fade. He wouldn't feel the morning sun or warm blankets or flickering fires.

Only oblivion awaited him.

Yes, he would reincarnate. That's merely how this world operated, but going from adulthood to a baby with no memories was almost the same as ceasing to exist.

Right now, he was thinking about Satella. If he jumped, he wouldn't remember her.

He wouldn't remember her smile, her laugh, her wit, or her love. He wouldn't remember how she had saved his life or how he had saved hers.

He'd be giving that up to save her.

…He was okay with that.

He closed his eyes. His muscles relaxed.

He was ready.

He tried to push himself off the wall…but Pandora held him in her grasp.

"Promises are important," she murmured, smiling softly. "Do you know what my promise was, my treasured one?"

He didn't answer. He wasn't focused on her anymore.

"I promised myself that I would not let you die again without telling you that I loved you."

He blinked as her words washed over him. "I'm married," he deadpanned.

Her smile grew a bit. "I know that you are. It is truly wonderful."

"…You know that I'm not married to you, right?"

Her smile quickly shriveled up into a grimace. "Why would you—that is simply a disturbing thought. In what universe would I ever want to marry you?"

He furrowed his eyebrows. Perhaps he wasn't the only emotionally stunted one here. "Wait, you just said that you loved me—"

"And you love the Witch of Gluttony. Does that mean that you wish to marry her?"

"What?! No!"

"Magnificent. That is your answer."

"That doesn't answer anything! These situations aren't anything alike!" He pulled at his hair, astounded that a conversation like this was possible. "What about my wife, huh?!"

Pandora cocked her head to the side. "What about her?"

"'What about her?'" he mocked. Pandora frowned. "You kissed my unconscious, dying wife! Are you gonna try and tell me that you don't want to be with her, either?"

Her sapphire eyes locked onto his, flashing dangerously. "I said that I was proving my love, did I not?"

"Yes, but—"

"Love does not have to be romantic."

"But you kissed her!"

Pandora didn't falter. "What matters to me is that you know how much I love you. I care not what derivation you assume it to be. I care not if my methods are unconventional. I care not for anything but your understanding and your love."

Hearing the sincerity in her voice, Subaru's shoulders slumped. "That's…that's beyond fucked up. You're insane."

"Pot, meet kettle."

"I hate that I can't disagree…"

He turned away from her, still held in her iron grip. "Honestly, I think that just took away any doubts that I had about killing myself."

"Oh? How wonderful. I am happy to have helped." She loosened her arms. "I believe in you. I hope that you know that."

He did know that. Her faith in him was even stronger than Geuse's.

He didn't know why. At that moment, it didn't matter.

"You will save her," she whispered. "She will be so happy when you free her. She still loves you, despite everything that you have done. It could be just the two of you, living the peaceful lives that you have always wanted."

Every word of hers lulled him into a daze, bringing him further to the edge.

It wasn't magic. She was simply helping him move on. It felt like forever since someone had offered him reassurance like this.

But as he took another step forward, one line caught him off guard.

"You are still on the right path. You will reach our desired future."

He froze. "…Repeat that."

Pandora's eyes brightened. "Does it encourage you? I will happily repeat it as many times as you want. You will reach our desired future."

"And…I'm on the right path? Everything has gone according to plan?"

Her smile softened. "You've performed excellently, my treasured one."

All was quiet between them. A bit of wind whistled through the air, but Subaru didn't notice. His thoughts, previously so sluggish, moved into overdrive. His emotions, so muted mere minutes before, erupted inside of him.

"Performed," he echoed. His outer voice didn't match his inner one. "Right path. Plan."

Her soft laugh held a hint of exhilaration. "Oh, you do understand! I was worried that we weren't on the same page."

"…You knew. You knew that this wouldn't work. You knew that I'd fail."

Her smile fell. "I'm sorry, I thought—You knew that this was the plan, yet you view this as a failure?"

They were on opposite wavelengths while speaking of the same events. Subaru decided to ask her point-blank.

"Did you know that Satella would only accept the Witch Factor of Envy? Did you know that the others would reject her?"

Pandora's lips parted to form a silent "oh." She nodded, saying, "Ah, that. Yes. My apologies, I was a bit confused."

"So…you knew that they died for nothing. That Daphne died for nothing."

"Of course not. Your grief was necessary."

The wind stopped. The air itself stilled. Their shadows lengthened, creeping up behind them and preparing to strike.

But Subaru didn't need to use any magic.

His last vestiges of coherency and sanity fled. All thoughts turned to the devil before him as well as how stupidhe had been for believing her.

Faster than she could react, his hands darted out and wrapped around her throat. He tackled her to the ground, a sense of sick satisfaction filling him as her head cracked against the stone.

"You knew," he seethed. "You knew that this wouldn't work. You knew that they didn't have to die."

Pandora couldn't respond. His thumbs dug into her windpipe, bruising her throat.

She didn't fight back. Anticipation filled her eyes.

Subaru pressed down harder. "I swear…I will kill you."

No more words were said. None were needed. Only raw emotion existed.

He prolonged her suffering, not willing to let her die quite yet. He wanted her to feel the pain that he felt and know how much grief she had caused him. He wanted her to know how much he hated himself for believing in her. Most of all, he wanted her to know how much he hated her.

His impatience won over. He squeezed harder. Her neck snapped, and she fell limp.

Seeing her bruised neck and bloody skull…Subaru almost smiled. For all that he blamed himself, he blamed her just as much.

His hand had committed the atrocities, but her mind had crafted it.

And yet, seeing her corpse made his heart hurt, making him even angrier. He embraced that rage, feeling more alive than he had in weeks.

…Weeks. Satella had been sealed weeks ago. A zombie had replaced Subaru. Now that Pandora was dead, he felt alive.

But then, he heard a voice that made his blood run cold.

"Thank you, my treasured one."

Pandora had disappeared from his grasp. Her bloody figure was gone. Now, she stood above him with a serene smile.

There was no uncertainty or insecurity. There was no mask. She simply was.

"Once again, I was letting myself get carried away," she said airily, smiling at his horror-struck expression. "So, I must thank you for killing me."

She made a slight motion with her finger. Without him moving, he found himself on his back, looking up at her with wide eyes.

"How magnificent," she said, almost blushing. "The hatred you feel…Did you know that hatred is not the opposite of love? In truth, the opposite is indifference, and you most certainly do not feel that for me. Why, your hatred for me…the burning passion in your heart…It may as well be the love that you once felt."

She reached down and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, lifting him up with strength unbefitting her stature. Her expression didn't change in the slightest, even as her empty eyes met his fearful ones.

"Love is quite wonderful, is it not? I feel it every day, and yet, when I look at you…I feel so much more than that. It is an overpowering sensation that fills me with joy. Something so similar, so intoxicating, and yet, so different."

Subaru barely registered her words. He stared at her with wide, quivering eyes, barely able to process what had just transpired.

"Alongside all of my love, my devotion, my appreciation, and my affection…"

With that same smile and tone, she brought his face directly in front of hers. He could feel her frigid breath, as her other hand pushed on his back and brought them even closer together. For a moment, he thought that she might try to kiss him, if only to prove that what she had said were her true feelings.

She didn't. She had nothing to prove.

Finally, she spoke again. Her words, flowing so easily from her slightly parted lips, shocked him as much as her revival had.

"I hate you, Subaru Natsuki."

Her thumb brushed across his cheek, knowing full well the effect those words would have on him. Even though he wouldn't be able to understand why, she knew that it would hurt him as much as if Satella, Daphne, or Shaula had said that.

The glistening in his eyes proved that she was right.

His pain exhilarated her.

Pandora opened her hand and dropped him to the ground. He tried to push himself up, but—

"Subaru Natsuki has no arms."

She didn't attack him nor did she dismember him. He fell to the ground, for he never had arms to hold himself up in the first place. He raised his head and opened his mouth—

"Subaru Natsuki has no tongue. No legs. No magic. No power. Subaru Natsuki cannot move nor speak."

And just like that, he was at her mercy.

His mind went blank. He didn't have muscles, so he couldn't struggle. He was a lump of flesh and nothing more.

He may as well be dead.

Pandora fell to her knees before him and cradled his head in her hands. She smiled at him. "Ah, it always feels so wonderful to say that for the first time. Surely, you could at least understand that, right?"

He didn't understand anything! He was so utterly confused—how was she alive?! He had killed her! How was she doing this to him?! What had happened to his body?!

She was unfazed by his panic. "What you feel now…That was me. When I was a young girl, I felt as helpless as you do now, but you saved me from that. That is why I love you, my treasured one. You gave me the freedom that I had never believed in, and I wanted nothing more than to spend it by your side."

She placed his head in her lap; her cold skin nearly gave him frostbite. She threaded her hands through his hair in a mere imitation of what Satella used to do.

With a start, he realized that Pandora hadn't lied when she said that she was always watching them. She wasn't just being creepy. She had actually watched them, and she was copying them both. She took a gentle moment and turned it into something deranged.

With his head in her lap and her fingers in his hair, she murmured, "And yet, these feelings of helplessness, like you are a worthless lump of flesh at the mercy of the divine…That is what you are putting me through. I am at your mercy. My fate is in your hands. My future is yours to decide.

"I am here today…because of you.

"You began this never-ending cycle, and you refuse to end it. You perpetuate my torture for your own selfish desires. You keep me here because you cannot muster the resolve to end this song and dance, and I hate you for it."

Her tone and expression remained stagnant. She caressed his cheek, as cracks formed across his skin. It didn't break apart like it would under Typhon's Authority, but he was shattering, nonetheless.

His blood rushed through his ears. As Pandora tried to lull him into an endless slumber, he fought her off. He refused to die on any terms but his own. But most of all, he needed to know…

"…Wh-who are you?"

Pandora jolted a bit, looking down at him in awe. "You can speak," she whispered. "Magnificent. Your will is truly admirable."

His tongue had reformed. His mouth could move. He took a shuddering breath and ignored the pain from his missing limbs.

"Answer me…you monster!"

A shadow spear pierced the underside of Pandora's throat and tore through her brain, killing her instantly. Subaru's limbs returned to him, but they had never left in the first place.

"I am Pandora," she said from his left. He shot to his feet and burned her alive, but she rose from the ashes like a phoenix. "I am the villain of your story and the hero of mine. I am the one who loves you the most and the one whom you use to treasure above all else—perhaps even more than your own wife."

He stabbed her in the heart with his dagger, but he knew that it was futile. It felt like a million Pandoras were slowly approaching him, and he had to take all of them out, yet his only weapon was a stick against her suits of armor.

His magic was nothing against the undying.

"I am the one whom you despise," she continued, flipping her hair back after being eviscerated by lightning. "I am the one who despises you. I am the one who wants nothing more than to be in your arms, but being around you makes me sick to my stomach."

He gritted his teeth. He may have asked her a question, but now, he wanted nothing more than for her to shut up.

"Al Goa!"

She let it hit her. She came back. "Who am I?" she repeated as if she hadn't been killed for the hundredth time in minutes. "That is a complicated question, my treasured one, but I suppose that one answer fits above all others."

With her smile firmly fixed upon her face, she introduced herself to him.

"I am Pandora…the Witch of Vainglory."

Witch.

She was a Witch.

At that moment, Subaru could have thought many things. He could have felt frustrated that she had him kill the other Witches but not herself. He could have been bewildered that there was another Witch Factor that had been hidden from him. He could have wondered if the Od Laguna had known of this. He could have felt awe at how powerful she was—even Echidna, who had called down a star from the sky, wasn't able to revive herself like that. Echidna wasn't able to warp reality like Pandora could. Not even Satella was capable of such a thing.

But no. Nothing like that crossed his mind. He only had one thought.

'I missed one.'

He bared his teeth and struck once more, knowing full well that it wouldn't be enough. What he was doing was making a statement—a reaffirmation of what he had said not long ago.

"I swear, I will kill you."

She appeared in front of him again, as the rock that had crushed her was nowhere to be found. "How confident," she said aloofly. "But you can't do it now, can you?"

"I can't," he conceded after a brief period of silence, "not permanently, but there's something that I can do when I come back, isn't there?"

She didn't answer. She didn't need to. He already knew.

"I've spent my final days preparing," he said. "All that mattered was saving Satella. But now? Add 'cutting off your head and hanging it on my wall' to my list."

He dashed forward, intent on getting one last clean hit in—

"Do you truly hate me that much, my love?"

He skidded to a stop, the sudden shift in momentum nearly bowling him over. Standing in front of him wasn't Pandora…but Satella.

"Why would you want to hurt me?" she asked, tears leaking from her amethyst eyes. "What happened to the kind, wonderful man that I married?"

Subaru gasped for breath, trying to respond…but he couldn't.

Or, rather, he suddenly didn't want to. He had no need to speak to her.

A sick smile spread across his lips, straining his cheeks. Without an ounce of hesitation, he threw his dagger at his wife's angelic visage, striking her dead where she stood.

"That's not very nice of Flu-Flu," Daphne said from behind him. "Mom deserved better."

He burned her alive, just as he did to Carmilla when that cursed Witch had impersonated someone that he cared about.

"How expected, I suppose," Beatrice said, crossing her arms. "It's only natural that you would hurt everyone around you, in fact."

As he trapped her in a whirlpool of water, drowning her, he said, "I didn't fall for it with Carmilla, and I won't fall for it with you, Pandora!"

This wasn't Carmilla's Authority of Lust. He was still able to breathe just fine.

Undoubtedly, this was Pandora's Authority of Vainglory: a power that he knew nothing about. From what he had seen, it was pointless to fight against.

"But there's always a weakness, and I won't stop fighting until I find it."

A soft chuckle made him freeze. "You're determined, all right. I guess that's what it means to be Kenichi's son."

Subaru whirled around to face a woman that he had never met before, but her eyes were oh-so-familiar.

He hadn't seen them in years…but he was pretty sure that those were his own eyes.

"Or perhaps you got it from me," she mused. "We're both pretty stubborn, so does that mean you're twice as stubborn? I don't think that's how it works…Kenichi, do you remember?"

A man appeared at her side, looking like an older version of Subaru. He chuckled, even sounding like Subaru.

"Heh, it's been a while since I took biology, but I'm pretty sure that genetics combine traits, not double them."

"So, if he's half of my stubbornness and half of yours—"

"Then he's just one stubborn kid!"

The man—Kenichi—grinned at Subaru, who remained silent and still.

Kenichi winked. "By the way, congratulations on getting married. She's a real catch. How did you two—

He was knocked to the ground by Subaru's fist.

"I recognize that face," Subaru said to the woman, breathing heavily. "Saw it on a document in City Hall. If you think that's gonna make me stop, then you really don't understand me at all, do you, Pandora?"

The woman—the visage of his mother, Naoko—didn't stop smiling. If anything, she seemed fascinated by his emotional nuances.

Subaru, of course, didn't give a shit about what interested her. He casually stepped forward, grabbed the sides of her head, and snapped her neck.

"How cruel of you, Master," Geuse said. Subaru scowled and killed the fake spirit, but another Finger took its place. "You always speak of family, yet you kill your own mother?"

"That wasn't my mother," Subaru shot back. He didn't have a mother.

"Then what about your so-called 'daughter'? Did you—"

Geuse wasn't able to finish his sentence.

A vein throbbed in Subaru's forehead. "Why are you doing this?!" he called out. "What's the fucking point?!"

When Pandora appeared in front of him again, it wasn't of someone he knew but of someone whom he desperately wanted to know. A small figure that made his heart hurt like nothing else. An overwhelming sensation of loss filled him, taking away his breath.

She appeared to him as a little girl with silver hair and dark-brown eyes.

"Because I want you to understand me," the girl said in Pandora's voice, albeit even softer. For a moment, she seemed extremely uncomfortable in that form, but she quickly masked it. Her eyes never left his identical ones. "I want you to know what it feels like to lose everyone that you love. I want you to see them wither away before your very eyes, even as time refuses to touch you."

"That doesn't answer anything! What the hell do you accomplish by torturing me?!"

She cocked her head to the side. "If I told you, would you listen?" she asked, already knowing the answer. "Another you would. Another you would hold me close and tell me that it's going to be okay, but you?

"…You would do nothing for me."

Her smile widened as she took advantage of his silence. "You already know the truth," she said, walking in circles around him. Her childlike form, coupled with the even tone of a sociopath, made his gut twist. "You've said it yourself. This life is merely preparation, but for whom? It's not for you. It's not for your wife.

"This life has been preparation for me.

"I dictate the scenario. I dictate who lives and dies. I may love the soul inside, but you, yourself, are nothing but a stepping stone. You are not the Subaru Natsuki that I treasure. You are simply…his predecessor. A prototype. A tool to create the character that will grant me fulfillment."

She paused, expecting to be killed for her words. He didn't move.

She brushed her hair away from her face, revealing the slight points of a quarter-elf's ear. "I see," she murmured. "This form gives you pause. That warms my heart, yet it disappoints me greatly. You have a long way to go, my treasured one."

Her hair was bleached platinum. Her eyes were hidden by brilliant sapphires.

She was killed instantly.

Again and again, she spoke of how much she loved and hated him as well as how she craved his affection and understanding. Again and again, he either killed her or beat her to a bloody pulp. She took various forms to taunt him, though she never appeared as a silver-haired quarter-elf again.

"Just give up!" Minerva shouted. "It's not worth fighting anymore!"

He didn't bother to use magic. He just punched her in the face. He did the same to Satella.

It was pointless to try and kill her; he knew that. He simply wanted to make a statement.

"I won't stop fighting against you."

Be it in this life or the next, he would find a way to defeat her.

"Master!" he heard Shaula cry. "What's…what's going on?!"

He turned around and punched her in the stomach, grimacing as he watched her keel over. Was that all? Were his strikes getting weaker?

"I'll just hit you harder," he said, letting his anger out on full display. "I'll make you suffer if it's the last thing I do!"

He kicked the side of her head, dazing her. She didn't bleed. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes.

"Wh-why? Why are you doing this?"

Her warbling voice didn't give him pause. "Do you really need me to say it?" he asked mockingly. "Holy shit,you're stupid as fuck if you can't figure it out by now."

He stood above her with his fists clenched. "It's because I hate you more than anything."

At that moment, something inside of her broke. He didn't know what had changed, but he reveled in his small victory.

He picked her up by the neck and slammed her to the ground, pinning her. Staring straight into her forest-green eyes, he spoke:

"I'm leaving…and you can't stop me."

Her eyes widened, nearly popping out as he squeezed tighter.

"I'm leaving on my own terms. I'm doing it because I want to save Satella, not because I'm playing your stupid games, you bitch."

She didn't shift into someone else nor did she struggle against him. She just cried.

"I don't care how long it takes," he continued, revealing in her tears. "I don't care if I'm gone for centuries. You will wait for me, and I will kill you. Do you understand?"

She opened and closed her mouth multiple times before she croaked out, "M-Master, I—"

"Do. You. Understand. Me."

Slowly, she reached up and placed her hand on his. "I…I understand."

…She agreed.

No profound statement. No confessions of love or hatred. No vague implications about their shared history.

She just…gave in.

He loosened his hand a bit. She gasped for breath. Letting the tears flow even harder, she whispered, "Mother isn't coming back, is she?"

And just like that, Subaru realized his mistake.

This entire time, Pandora had been impersonating his loved ones, including Shaula, but this was the real deal.

This was the real Shaula, and he had hurt her.

Over the course of the last month, he had torn everything down. He had hurt everyone dear to him…except for Shaula. She was the only one who had maintained a semblance of happiness. Her belief in him was genuine, not born of a delusion like Geuse's faith.

Now, she laid beneath him, crying and nursing her wounded heart.

He jumped off of her, holding his head in his hands and pacing. He whipped around, realizing that he should apologize, but seeing her prone figure formed a lump in his throat. All he could do was croak out her name.

"Shaula…"

She turned her head a bit to look at him, but she didn't say anything right away. Then, she must have seen something in his eyes, as she began to panic. She shot to her feet, crying out, "Master, wait!"

But he was already gone.

He ran through the Tower, trying to get as far away from her as possible. He refused to let himself be seen by her—not in the state that he would soon be in.

He didn't vow to save her nor did he vow to kill Pandora. Instead, he gave an all-encompassing:

"I swear, I will make this right."

Barely aware of his surroundings, he burst into a room and locked the door behind him.

No more hesitation. No more deliberation.

No one's terms but his own.

In one, swift motion, he took out a knife and stabbed himself in the throat.

A single second was all it took to take his life. All the struggle, pain, and torture ended with mundane steel.

The Sage, a mortal man, fell to the floor with a genuine smile on his face.

…And someone was looking down upon him with contempt.

Clenched teeth. Shaking fists. An overwhelming urge to beat that disgusting corpse, held back only by the knowledge that it was pointless.

Not just because the Sage was already dead…but because it was all an illusion. A memory. A representation about what had been lost.

A Witch's Trial.

With pursed lips and narrowed eyes, the real Subaru Natsuki glared down at the corpse of his former self.

His tears had long run dry. His inability to change the events before him had sapped his strength.

And yet, he had patiently witnessed everything before him.

Every disgusting act of cruelty. Every tear that his loved ones had shed.

He had seen it all.

Yes, he had known of the events. His Book of the Dead had given him all of the important memories—enough that he considered himself to be Flugel as much as he was Subaru.

Now, however, he knew everything.

Minerva's family. Typhon's last wish. Echidna's defeat at the hands of Pandora. The truth behind Daphne's death.

His fingernails dug into his palms but not deep enough to draw blood. He didn't scratch his arms.

He simply waited.

While most of Geuse's memories had faded, he still knew what came next. On cue, the door burst open, revealing the Sage's corpse to Geuse.

Seeing Geuse fall to his knees and weep, Subaru almost turned away, but he didn't. If he didn't come to terms with his past during the First Trial, when would he?

His resolve almost faded when Shaula burst in, especially when he saw his fingerprints on her neck.

An alternate timeline flashed before his mind's eye. "It's not the first time Master's hit me when he's angry, nope!"

He didn't know why Shaula still cared for him, yet there she was, crying hysterically over his smiling corpse.

At some point in one's life, people wonder, "How will people react to my death? Will they cry at my funeral? Will they move on?"

It's a phase, a series of passing thoughts, but the grim nature prevents one from forgetting it, especially since no one can ever know the answer.

Except for Subaru.

He took a deep breath. In, out. Just like he had practiced with Beatrice and Emilia. In, out.

He loosened his jaw, unclenched his fists, counted to ten, took another deep breath, and walked out of the room.

He didn't look back.