Oh God, it's alive.
I advise you to read back to refresh your memories, it's been a while.
Chapter 11
Today I made a wonderful discovery: there is something deeply satisfying in seeing someone trying to do something you effortlessly do every day and not only failing but ending up a sweaty, huffing mess for it. It's a delicious sense of amused superiority that creeps into your very soul, clearly the secret of all sadistic masters everywhere and perhaps the reason why Ranma likes training me so much.
I cast my gaze upon the wheezing mess of a human being and smiled the smile of a father watching his child taking their first steps.
"Come on, Haruka! Just two more kilometers!" I called out, reminding her how close we are to finishing… and how much she still needed to run.
Haruka's response wasn't anything coherent, something between a groan and an animal cry. I ignored it and continued to needle her to keep up.
Ah~ Nerima is absolutely beautiful today, clear blue skies, thin lines of clouds, happy chirps of morning birds, desperate huffing and puffing of cute tomboy kohai, simply exquisite!
We turned another corner of the quaint little urban area we were crossing, and Haruka promptly got splashed on her side. Her abused legs immediately gave out in face of the unexpected hit, making her crumble under the meager weight of a bucket of water.
The granny who was washing the sidewalk let out a dejected sign as her target failed to change genders.
"Oi Haruka." I dropped from the fence I was running on top off: much harder than it looked I'll tell you that. "Yer alive?" I asked, nudging her prone, tracksuit-clad form with my sneaker.
The girl let out a loud groan against the sidewalk in response. Seeing that, I squatted down to her level and turned her over so she didn't drown in the puddle or something.
"Aff… You know… That was… Aff Aff… That was mean, senpai… Aff…" She huffed, her face red and gleaming under the sun.
"Busted~" I couldn't help but smile at that. "When did you figure out I was leading you on?"
"Around… Aff… The halfway mark… Aff" She spends a couple of seconds getting her breathing under control before looking at me. "… Also, screw you senpai."
My smile got bigger, atta girl! "So! As you surely realized, you don't have to run as much tomorrow. Honestly, ten kilometers is crazy for a complete beginner; who the hell would be dumb enough to go along with it." She let out a long whine. "But yeah, everything I taught you today still valid, just not as intense. Now up! On your feet, girl! We gotta go."
And if she has any complaints about my borderline hazing ways to impart knowledge she can take it up with Ranma, he is the only teaching example I have and he is the master of the forgetting-your-student-has-human-limits way of teaching.
"Nooo… Tired…" The girl groaned; eyes set to the sky with a determination for not moving only seen in Snorlaxes blocking roads.
I shrugged. "Well, I was going to take you to Hanna Miller's and pay for a nice breakfast but if you're sure— Oh my! Look who is up and about, I thought you're too tired to move."
"I'm starving." My dear kohai mumbled, and I'm sure the busty waitresses with microskirts hadn't even crossed her mind, no sir! The bright blush on her cute cheeks is her thinking about sandwiches.
We set off at a more sedate rate, extra sedate when the thrill of ogling pretty waitress finally faded enough to remind Haruka that her legs were about to detach from her body.
It wasn't a problem, of course, as there is still plenty of time before my school start, and Haruka won't have to go to hers today. Both Haruka and I were used to waking up at ungodly hours; me, for my morning runs, and Haruka… because she wanted to be the first girl to the school school building or something, she gets really dodgy about the actual reason when asked so I don't want to press. Her unreasonable early record probably won't last now that she's joining me for my morning training, though.
I was glad for that, really, both for her company and for the excuse to have more time to keep an eye on her…
… There's been two incidents involving those Cardian Monsters now, and I do not like how they'd happened uncomfortably close to me nor how I don't have any lead on what they are and where they came from – Interrogating Minon yielded no results, and I hadn't had the time to pull out the catgirl yet. I knew this was something had to look into asap, but the lack of any meaningful leads or even a place to start looking makes keeping my guard up and wait the only option I can see for now.
Just hunkering down and focus on getting stronger isn't going to cut it though, Haruka and Kodachi had nearly paid the price for that. This world proved time and time again that it's a lot more complicated than Ranma ½, so I got to be prepared.
"That's a scary look you have there, senpai. What are you thinking about?"
"World domination."
"Heh, good one… It was a joke right, senpai?... P-please answer me senpai!"
The warmth of the sunlight was contrasting well with the chill of the wind, creating an absolutely perfect climate to be outdoors, and the vast senior population of this neighborhood was taking advantage of that fact to be out and about in greater number than usual. Everywhere we went shopkeepers and passerby's greeted Haruka with happy words and warm smiles, and to my surprise, I found myself on the receiving end of some of those greetings.
It was… nice, I guess, finally having the local community accepting my presence.
But alas, this being Nerima, and my life being my life, our peaceful walk didn't remain peaceful for very long.
"GAH!" Cried out the middle-aged looking teenager as he crumbled dramatically near our feet. Neither Haruka nor I acknowledge his presence, as we were busy deadpanning at the all-out brawl happening in the middle of the street.
"You know." Haruka murmured, somehow making herself heard under the sounds of meaty crashes, curses, and yells, "I'd never even seen a real delinquent before I met you senpai."
…
"… I sincerely apologize for that." I replied with a bow before turning to deal with the mess.
Delinquents, delinquents, and more delinquents – it's always delinquents with me these days… That, or youkai, demons, hentai ninjas, weird monsters… Now that I think about it, what the fuck is wrong with my life?
Without even looking, I snatched another guy as he flew past me, holding him by his nape like a dog as I brought him to my level.
"Alright, who are you."
"Nii-san!" Hoh? A Viper guy! Color me surprised. "Nii-san there's been an attack!"
"You don't say."
"It's Ragnarok! They are here for you nii-san! But don't worry, we're got your back!"
"I feel safer already," I mumbled, practically dismissing the guy's existence while sweeping the area with my eyes, using the title tags above the crowd's heads to discern between Viper and Ragnarok from an otherwise near-identical mass of thug-looking teenagers.
New Quest: Enemy Beatdown Quest Number 38
Your little friends are in trouble! Do something about it!
Reward:
50 exp.
Increases closeness with the Vipers gang of middle school hooligans.
Failure:
Decrease closeness with the Vipers gang of middle school hooligans.
Pitiful amount of exp but hey, a quest is a quest.
What followed next was a massacre, plain and simple. This wasn't my first time fighting a crowd of enemies but it was my first time fighting a crowd while knowing how to properly fight. It was honestly scary what someone with the Gamer System can do after a week of martial art boot camp. I move from enemy to enemy like lighting, their next move so obvious that it might as well be glowing to my eyes like this was a video game, ironic as that statement may be. To say I made short work of them was the understatement of the century.
It was actually less brutal than my first group tussle, that time had me flailing around my bat on instinct and battle experience alone; it did the job bringing them down but it certainly bloodied them for it. Now that I knew where and how to strike, and could bring them down quicker and clearer, without blood or broken bones, and I didn't even need to touch my bat.
Another unconscious body hit the ground and the last tree standing Ragnarok members finally noticed my presence, along with their Vipers counterparts many of who were blinking dumbly by their sudden lack of opponents. I quickly move to finish the job before catching a blur of movement in the corner of my eye, my neck snapped to the side to lean away from the trajectory of the strike, the air booming slightly at my ear. My reaction kick was just as fast, taking a few strands of hair of my new opponent as he shifted into a hasty dodge and a hopping retreat.
"Scary, scary." He commented good-naturally, spitting the now broken blade of grass he held on his lips. His smile never faded. "So this is the man who sent Shinnosuke running to the mountains huh?"
I took a second to size him up. Tall, muscular with a focus on upper body strength, a bit older than me- I mean, older than my current biological age, deeply tanned skin, light blue hair tied in a short pony-tail, handsome features… Overall pretty normal looking if you disregard the odd color pattern he got going on, thus making him a normal-looking delinquent, so important by default.
His name, though.
Takeda Ikki
Takeda the Puncher
Level: 17
… I swear to god I heard that name before, in fact, his appearance coupled with his name made my eyebrow twitch in frustration. I know him from somewhere, but I never meet him before in my entire life, I'm pretty my subconscious was trying to tell me about something but I put a pin on it …
Ah fuck, he's some anime character, isn't he? Must be. Maybe a mirror character from Ranma or Taimanin, or from another setting I haven't discovered yet, because that's practically a pattern at this point.
"So you're the leader?" Damn punk with his cheese dramatic entrance. "About time you joined in, already beat most of your goons."
"Oh no no no." He waved his right hand in a lazy placating gesture; his left remained in his pocket. "I'm not here to fight you see, I'm just here to deliver a message."
"Eh~ that's a pretty good punch for someone 'just delivering a message'."
His relaxed grin got a little bigger. "Haha, that was just a little friendly greeting."
The balls on this motherfucker.
"Right then, I'll humor you, say your piece."
He stared at me for another moment before, to my surprise, folded his right arm against his chest and gave me a short bow.
"Ōe Hiroshi, The Dandy Bat." I winced at the nickname. Goddamn it. "I, Takeda Ikki, representative of the Kisara's unit of Ragnarok came here today to proudly offer you a position within our group."
This again? I tsked. "That shaggy hair whatshisface already said the same thing what makes you think my answer will change?"
"Shinnosuke was acting completely on this own." The Takeda guy smiled – God, where the fuck do I know him!? It's driving me crazy! "This is different, this is an official Ragnarok offer, approved by people pretty high up you know."
"I don't see why I should care."
"You should." The guy continued. "Ragnarok is extending an arm even after so many insults, unprecedented, really, and a little impressive." He brought another blade of grass he took from god knows where to his mouth. "You really should accept it you know, further insults will not be tolerated."
Uuuu, scary, I try to not roll my eyes. Really, after all those yokai and monsters a gang of delinquent is more of an annoyance than a threat.
"I hear ya, here is my answer."
It was obvious that Takeda was expecting another attack… so I made sure I moved at a speed that would wake his arrogant ass up. The result was his eyes funnily bugging out in surprise and his single arm guard barely managed to block my Spartan kick.
It made little difference as I could feel his arm slamming against his chest and his body being propelled backward, his feet tracing a pretty neat line on the ground for a few meters.
He proved he has at least some skill by not falling on his ass after that.
"Got it? I can answer it again if you want more clarification." I said, wiggling my still raised foot.
"Haha, how violent…" The guy tried to laugh it off but I could see the effect of my blow as he shook his arm.
Still wasn't using his other one huh? A hidden weapon? No, it didn't even twitch at my surprise kick. Recovering injury, perhaps?
"Hehehe! You tell'im nii-san!"
"Betcha ya didn't expect that, Trashnarok!"
"Ha Ha, he went flying, holy crap! Did you see that!"
Oh, forgot about the Viper guys, most were still standing now that their opponents suffered a sudden case of me. They've been strangely silent since Takeda guy announced himself but now had apparently lost their fear and were actively surrounding him.
The Takeda guy for his part, swept his eyes over the group of giggling delinquents slowly closing in, before looking at me. He wasn't smiling anymore.
"Hey man, you're the one who put yourself in this situation," I said with a shrug.
"It appears so…" He munched on the blade of grass on his mouth for a few seconds before smiling once again. "How about a deal?"
Trying to talk your way out, huh?
"Let's hear it."
"… Ragnarok's objective is to become the strongest gang in Tokyo, which means dominating every region… But Nerima isn't a focus right now."
"But it will be if one of a high-rank members turn up broken and bruised and with his dignity not so intact." I finished for him, taking the opportunity to needle him a little.
He narrowed his eyes a little bit but shrugged. "I can put in a good word, make sure your… answer… is delivered a little later, it could buy you a couple of weeks."
Shit proposition to be honest. Why the hell would I trust him to keep his word? Fuck, the motherfucker comes to my neighborhood, starts a fight, pulls a shitty Bond villain move by spying on the sidelines to gauge my strength, then try to sneak attack me while I was distracted. Yeah, he doesn't exactly give an impression of a trustworthy fellow.
And why the hell would I even want to play delinquent politics? these are fucking delinquents; a bunch of teenagers larping gang warfare, honestly, I outgrew the need to worry about them, unless they got a Ranma-level martial artist in their ranks or something, and those don't exactly grow on trees... wait a second…
Is that Misako-san from the flower shop around the corner? I looked over the Ragnarok goon's shoulder and yeah it is. Why is she hiding up there and why does she looks… scared…
…
…Fuck.
Fuck, what am I doing?
Nerima is a quiet neighborhood, I don't know if this will stay true considering that Ranma lives here, but right now it is a quiet neighborhood, this area in particular is where a lot of elderly people live.
And look at me, together with fifteen something thug-looking teenagers about to gang up on a single guy. The early fight was one thing; I stopped it to keep it from escalating, but now… It just…
I breathe out, relaxing my stance. "Alright, deal, a few weeks without annoyances. Go."
"Haha! You heard it, bitch! Prepare to… Wait what?"
The mocking laughter of the nearby delinquents slowly died out as they digested my words being replaced by confusing mumbling. Even the Takeda guy seems to double-take, blinking at me with wide eyes and a stupid expression.
Seriously? Did they think I was going to… I was giving up the image, wasn't I?
"… Are you deaf, bastard!? I said go!"
It was all incentive Takeda needed as he promptly backtracked out of the circle of delinquents who were too stunned to stop him. For a guy who tried to enter a fight in the most dramatic way possible he was quick to scurry off when the opportunity called.
I took solace in the fact he'll definitely be feeling that arm tomorrow, fucker.
Quest completed:
+ 50 exp
Your closeness with the Viper's gang of middle school hooligans has increased.
Yeah, Yeah…
"Are you alright, sempai?" Hakura appeared by my side, her finger curling over my sleeve in solidarity.
"Yeah, why?"
"… You looked a little bit…" The girl trails off before shaking her head and looking in the direction Takeda guy fled to. "Are you sure that was wise?"
"No," I answered immediately. "It's just…" I mused over trying to find the right words before scratching my gelled hair in annoyance. Mind as well be honest. "It just didn't feel right at the end there, you know."
"… I think I do actually." She nodded, looking up at me with a smile. "Good work sempai."
Hum, that actually made me feel a bit better.
"UOAWWWW!" One of the delinquents suddenly cried out, startling pretty much everybody. "I got it! Nii-san was sending a message! Like, 'Yo yo, look fuckers! Only one of your dudes came back, don't mess with us, punks!'"
There was a beat of silence where nobody spoke.
And then every delinquent in the street pumped their fists in the air and cried out like a butch of fucking monkeys.
"I see, I see!"
"As expected from Nii-san!"
"Dandy Bat, forever!"
"Freaking Savage! HAHA!"
Fucking. Monkeys.
"Nii-san! Nee-san!" One of the delinquents approached; from the taller stature and higher amount of bling I reckon he must be the leader…. And I found myself blinking as I kind of recognized his generic thirty-year-old-looking face. "It's good to see you again!"
"You're… Touji, right?" I said, recalling the delinquent I met all those days ago, around the same time as I met Haruka actually.
The girl at my side let out a noise of recognition as it dawned on her too.
"Yes!" Wait a second, is this guy crying? "Nii-san… You…. You did it!" Holy crap, he is crying! "You made the wicked Kuno Kodachi confess! She's been banned from the sport! Ohhh, My Little sister is avenged!" His tears gushed out, and he bowed almost 90 degrees. "Thank you very much!"
Wait what?
Quest completed:
+ 1.000 exp
Your closeness with the Viper's gang of middle school hooligans has increased.
Your closeness with Sakamoto Touji has vastly increased.
You have been noticed by the Underground world of the Rhythmic Gymnastics Martial art.
Hold on, there was a quest!? When!? What!? Why!? The Fuck is the Underground world of Rhythmic Gymnastics Martial art!? And Kodachi confessed!?
What!?
Fucking… and he is still bowing.
"Look hm… it's alright, you can stand—."
"That's not all, nii-san!" He comes up already shouting. "We told everybody what you've done, how much you helped us, and how you stand up to those Ragnarok fuckers! Aniki was moved to tears!" He brought a trembling fist close to his face while his emotions continued to overflow, a gesture so shounen it hurts. "Selfless actions like that should-no must be rewarded!"
He whipped around, waving his arm to… the group of Vipers delinquents, who had suddenly lined up behind him.
"Nii-san, I introduce to you to Nagato, The Firepunch! Takato, The Snake, Gorijo, The Nutcracker…" He continued on listing names and titles that sounded cheesy as hell, each time the respective delinquent would grunt and strike a pose like a Jojo character.
"And finally me, Sakamoto Touji-sama, The Peddler!" He finished with a fierce grin. "Together we are the Touji-sama's corp of the Viper, no, previously of the Vipers! Ōe Hiroshi-nii-san, please let us follow you!"
…
…
Whut?
"… Well, at least they are… enthusiastic." Haruka commented slowly, and then she gave me a look.
What? What's that look, woman? It isn't my fault! No, I certainly didn't plan this!... I sincerely apologize for bringing delinquent trouble to your life.
"O.k.!" I said deliberately chirpy, preparing to launch the biggest 'fuck no!' of my life; let me tell you, it was going to be an exclamation for the ages.
Then… I had an idea.
And my mind latched on this terrible idea and wouldn't fucking let go.
… Delinquents are an annoyance; Ragnarok is a bigger annoyance and had the potential to become trouble. While they are not as bad as monsters and magic they are going to come for me eventually, sooner rather than later if that blue-haired punk doesn't keep his part of the deal.
I can deal with it; Ranma can deal with it, but Haruka? The community around me? They know about my relationship with Haruka, what if they struck at her before she could defend herself, what if they decide to make some examples; I don't really know how brutal they really are, so this is a possibility.
In that case, it… might be a good idea to have a buffer in case they come, someone to keep an eye on things, that are at least capable of holding on until I get there, or report to me if something happens.
… And a group of delinquents who don't like them, are familiar with their moves, and are looking at me like adoring puppies would be perfect for the job.
Am I really doing this?
Oh god, I'm really doing this.
"Firstly!" I declared, my voice booming across the streets. "That! You will take care of that!" I pointed at the fallen Ragnarok members.
"Hum, what should we do?" One of the guys asked.
"Don't know, take them to Delinquent Valhalla or something, I don't really care. Secondly!" My voice boomed again. My finger imperiously landing on the trail of cigarette butts, porn mags, empty soda cans, and general filth every delinquent seems to produce when they stay in the same place for more than five minutes. "Clean that up."
"…Whattt" Another one murmured breathlessly, like I just broke his entire worldview.
"Clean. That. Up. Oh!" I briefly turned around and snatched a bucket of white paint from a smiling Misako-san before pushing it to Touji. "And you will erase that graffiti on the wall, so help me god."
"And while we are at it..." I continued, bringing up my quest log because why not.
I actually get a stupid amount of quests during my morning runs, like, wayyy more than I can handle; every single little thing that happens seems to produce one. Unfortunately, because of time constraints and, frankly, experience value, I have to be very selective in what I choose to do.
Now though.
"Right, so, Maeda-san's son injured his back so she gonna need help manning her store about two blocks down from there on the right. The animal shelter three blocks up there in the 13th needs someone to walk the dogs. Kaminaga-san's house right there needs someone to fix the roof otherwise it will break during this week's storm. Ouchia-san's café on the 47th could use a hand today, their waitress called in sick. Watanabe's needs help with her garden at the 22th near the park. Also, while you're in the park clean up the trash those damn American tourists left there yesterday and wake up any passed out salaryman you find along the way, the Akukin Kensetsu landed a big contract yesterday so they must have partied too hard. Also, go to the market street and see if anyone needs help opening up, there is usually something happening over there. Oh, and have two of the tougher looking guys accompany the Haruyamas' kid to school today, he's been having a little bully problem and I want to see if I can scare them off before getting further involved, they live in the intersection between the 13th and the market street by the way. If you need directions just ask around, tell them I sent you."
Touji just stared at me blankly.
"What? did I fucking stutter!? MOVE dipshits!"
"Y-Y-YES ANIKI!"
And so they went, some running off across the street to the multiple tasks I laid out, some starting to collect fallen Ragnarok members, and one looking between the graffiti and the bucket of white like he was experiencing bizarro world.
Well, at least they are obeying.
I sighed.
This is it, I guess, my own gang of delinquents. Crap, it means I can't deny it anymore, I'm… I'm a delinquent.
Oh God, Ranma will never live that down.
I shook my head. Right, in the grand scene this isn't important, right now. What I have to focus is… the reunion at the Temple, it's today, I need to see if they can do something about Ranma's curse, and I also want to consult them about those Cardian monsters, and maybe get some contacts in the magic world, I really need a teacher.
One thing at the time, first, breakfast.
"Let's get going Haruka, it's getting pretty late, but I think we can beat the morning rush if we…"
Haruka was looking at me with a… paralyzed, unreadable expression. It honestly worried me a little bit; I don't think I ever saw her like this.
"Hum, What? What's wrong? Was it something I say?"
My worries increased tenfold when she bumped her forehead against my shoulders and started shaking. Only to disappear completely when I heard the giggles.
Lots and lots of loud, uncontrollable giggles.
Well, at least somebody is having fun, I suppose.
-0-0-0-
Today was a very interesting day in Furinkan High, one full of confusion, property damage, and escalating stupidity.
Why? Because Akane brought 'P-chan' to school and Ranma, who was already pissed at the entire situation, got even more pissed when all the girls of our class started fawning over him and passing him around from chest to chest, the eventual end-result was a chase sequence that would make Hanna Barbera proud.
Chaos ensued like it normally did; Kuno and Sasuke managed to get involved somehow but were quickly beaten back, Ranma got labeled a pervert for invading the girls' locker room, Akane got angry at him for assaulting her new pet, P-chan alternated between looking smug, amused, and incredibly moody, the teachers mysteriously disappeared like always, and I bore witness to all with horrified fascination.
It was like watching the plot of a Ranma ½ episode coming to life, in fact, I'm pretty sure it was exactly that. This marks the first time my mind made the connection of the events happening in real life to an actual episode of the show, and it was fucking weird.
Anyway, by the end of it all, Ranma was left angry, annoyed, and unsatisfied, him and Akane not on speaking terms, and P-chan wandered away to god-knows-where. My martial artist friend was about to follow after Akame to make his displeasure known, but I pulled him to the side and reminded him about our appointment. He brightened up considerably after that.
Though, not enough to not bitch about Akane for the entirety of the long, lonnng trip.
"And did you hear what she said to me at the end!" Ranma's voice resonated across the familiar park. We're near the entrance to the Temple now. "'He may be a pig but he got more manners than you!' Bah! Who does she think she is, that uncute tomboy!? I was trying to help her!"
Yeah, but you suck at giving context Ranma, just like you failed to give me any for this conversation. The only reason I'm following it at all is because of my metaknowledge. Not that I would've mind too much if that wasn't the case, sometimes you just gotta listen to your mate's rant.
Ranma had deflected a bit after that, his complaints finally starting to run out. At that, I saw the opportunity to bring out something we must talk about.
"So, Ryoga is a pig."
The pigtailed martial artist nearly tripped.
"How!?"
"Dude, you were literally screaming his name while you chased him around. Plus, I was watching your confrontation near the football pitch. He transformed into a pig when the irrigation system turned on." I shrugged, then decided to take a small risk. "I'm guessing he has a Jusenkyo curse too."
This made Ranma stop on his tracks, "And how did you figured that out?"
"Hey, your curse is the only water-based curse I know off, and he transformed under the exact same mechanic. So I took a guess, and your reaction just told me I'm right." I explained. God, I'm really glad I've been preparing for this exact conversation ever since Ryoga first showed up. "Ranma, the hell's happening?"
My friend stared at me intensely for a few seconds, his hesitation honestly surprising me. I didn't think he would be so skittish about Ryoga's curse, I mean, yeah, Ranma was pretty prickly when it to the subject of curses, but he had relaxed a lot after he saw I wasn't going to make a big deal about his. To see him so guarded… I guess it's a reminder that while he may be able to deal with it better, it's still a sensitive topic.
Still don't get why it's for Ryoga's curse though.
After what felt like a full minute, he let out a sigh and gesture at one of Japan's Wild Vending Machines on the side, I'm half convinced those things pop out from the ground when we're not looking. "Let's get some drinks."
And with that, Ranma told me about the previous night's events, including the half-tragic, half-stupid events that lead to Ryoga's current condition. It went pretty much as I remember it; Ranma goes to China, Ryoga - salty because of their missing duel - follows after him, reach Junsekyo somehow, gets accidentally kneeled in the face by girl Ranma, ends up in a cursed spring, almost get eaten by the Genma and the Jusenkyo guide, been suffering through misfortune after misfortune since. It's a bit interesting hearing about it rather than seeing it as a flashback.
"That's rough, buddy," I commented idly, taking another gulp of the mysterious coffee-flavored beverage the vending machine had coughed at me.
"Yeah." Ranma nodded, he was way more invested in the story than me, in fact, he looked downright sympathetic. "Hell, I knew the guy is stubborn, but to chase me all the way to China..."
I leaned forwards a bit, twirling the aluminum can over my fingers before flinging it to the nearest trash bin. "Ok, but there is still one thing that doesn't make sense to me. Why the hell were you so angry with the guy today? I've never seen you that angry with anyone before." I asked, subtly leading the conversation to where I want it to go.
The reminder of Ryoga's previous actions was enough to rekindle Ranma's anger, his own drink exploding in his grip.
"That bastard took advantage of his pig form! He used it to sleep in Akane's bed last night!"
And there it is.
My memories of the anime are not the best, but I remember this being one of the shittiest things Ryoga has done. Not the worst I'm sure, but the fact it happened so frequently and that he was fully consciously what he was doing only aggravates the situation.
We are not there yet; this was the first time this happened. It still better to nip this one out of the bud, or at least clear Ranma and mine's asses for when it inevitably blows up.
I made my face twitch, and my body tense as if I was surprised. It wasn't perfect acting but it didn't have to be, Ranma was more focused on his anger than my reaction, I just needed enough to fool in his peripheral vision.
Where is my acting skill damn it, I deserve it!
"That's a shitty thing to do." I started with the obvious and watched Ranma firmly nod in agreement. "And you need to tell Akane."
This statement seems to have cut through Ranma's angry thoughts; he visibly winced. I raised my eyebrow at the display, genuinely confused.
"Ok, you clearly didn't like that. What's wrong? Did you promise him you would keep his curse a secret or something?" I remember this happening in some fanfictions I read, can't remember if it's true or not.
Ranma shook his head. So not true. "It's just… Look, it's my fault that he's like that..."
…The hell?
What kind of stupid martyr complex bullshit was that? Fuck this.
"Not it isn't, stupid."
Ranma's face twisted into a frown.
"If I hadn't kicked him, he wouldn't have been cursed."
"If he hadn't followed you to China, he wouldn't have been cursed. If he had shown up for your duel, he wouldn't have been cursed. We can shift the blame around all day." I rolled my eyes at this idiocy. "You can't control other people's actions Ranma, and you're not responsible for their stupid mistakes. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, not even yourself."
Honestly, He could have avoided a lot of bullshit he went through in the anime if he didn't let people blame him for shit that wasn't his fault and actually let them suffer the consequences of their own action.
He stared at me for a second before slumping down, letting out a breath, and tsking his tongue. "What? You're a poet now?" He shook his head. "Doesn't matter, he still has a curse, and that's… It sucks Hiroshi, it really does. If it was me I wouldn't want this being spread around on my back."
I can understand that. But. "You're ignoring the context Ranma. You're not telling Akane just because. You're telling her because he took advantage of his curse to sleep with her. That's sexual harassment at the very least." I could see Ranma go stiff with tension. Oh yeah, I bet he hadn't thought it like that. When you put context into words it makes them sound more serious, more powerful. "She deserves to know, man. If only to avoid committing the same mistake twice, in case Ryoga is the type of guy who'd do it again." And he totally is. "Also, if you don't tell her, Akane might get pissed at you when she finds out — and she will find out someday, this is not something that stays hidden forever."
Ranma silently considered my words for a while. Then, he slowly exhaled the breath had pulled in, his fist unclenching. "… Alright, damn it, alright, I'll tell her."
I smiled and nodded, feeling relieved I was able to get through his thick skull before the situation escalated.
It was only when we were getting ready to continue our way that I noticed my mistake.
"Ah shit. I was wrong."
"What?"
"I kept saying you had to tell her and shit, but I didn't consider my own responsibility." I kicked a small pebble in annoyance. "You told me about it, so I now going to be complacent if I don't say anything. Ergo it's not 'you have to tell her' it's 'we have to tell her'."
Ranma sent me a strange look, but he still grinned. "Dude, that shit doesn't matter, lets just go already."
"It matters to me!" I complained as I walked. Bitch, for how long do you think I practiced that speech? I wanted to get it perfectly!
-0-0-0-
The stairs leading to the entrance of the temple were not far from where we made our stop. The white slabs of pristine brickwork going up the foot of a mount gleamed under the afternoon light. Large Torii gates framed the ascent, their bright red coloration contrasting beautifully with the greenery of the surroundings. Looking up from the base, we could barely see the top, the last Torii gate larger than the other loomed against the sky, it signified entrance into the sacred ground and the passage to what I knew was an equally magnific view.
I hadn't had the time to admire this the last time around, with the whole nighttime monster attack thing, but now that I wasn't in a hurry I could give the place the attention it was due. Even with Ranma fidgeting and muttering under his breath beside me, his nerves finally catching up now we were on the brink of our destination, it was still an experience.
One thing I noticed that was different than the last time was the feeling of the place, not the ambient feeling, but the supernatural, spiritual feeling in the air. Before, it was like immersing myself into an ocean, the air so heavy it leveled up my detection skill just by being close, with the temple above serving as a lighthouse, or a beacon for the said energy. Now it was… not faded, but muted, light and subtle rather than heavy and overwhelming.
But it was still there, and it still grew as we made our way up the stairs.
You have entered the area of influence of the Temple of The Heavenly Oni; all good alignment creatures are blessed while inside its boundaries.
You received the Blessing of the Heavenly Oni!
+ 3 to all attributes.
+ 20% to Hp and Mp regeneration
Oh yeah, there was also that thing.
"Che!" At Ranma's annoyed sound, I looked up from the blue screen. "Tourists."
He… he was right. The Temple's courtyard was much livelier than before. While not on the level of a true tourist attraction, which could draw people by the thousands on a good day, the place was full of families, group of friends, general temples visitors, and a healthy staff of Mikos keeping order, going about their duties… and selling souvenirs.
"I should have expected that, for a temple of this size," I commented.
Ranma shrugged, then he squared off his shoulders and took a resoluted step forward. "Let's go."
I smiled, making to walk behind him as we made our way across…
"… Hold on." I said, stopping on my tracks and causing Ranma to pause too.
"What?" He asked.
"There is something…" I squinted my eyes at the temple in the distance. There was something weird about it, but I couldn't place my finger on what. It looked like the same looming, magnific building that could probably double as a castle that I've seen on my last visit, but the feeling it gave off…
Spiritual Senses leveled up!
Ah, Gamer System for the win once more! With my sharper senses I could easily discern the differences in the impressions I was getting. Of course, it was different from before, that time I was feeling the raw power of the temple, right after the Cardian Minon destroyed the barrier-like dome we're in the process of stepping over.
"What we're seeing is not the real temple, if we go this way we won't reach it," I said confidently.
Ranma frowned. "Which way, then?"
"Well, keep in mind I'm going more by feeling than anything else but I think—"
You have gained the Heavenly Oni's undivided attention.
I choked mid-sentence at the appearance of the screen. What the fuck, who the fuck is that!? What the hell did I do!?
"Oi Hiroshi," Ranma called. I turned to see him looking to the side… There was a Miko running towards us.
"A thousand apologies honorable guests!" She was a petite woman this one, orange-hair, freckled face, somewhere in her twenties. She gave us a deep bow. "I'm Seto Hinata, Seishuuin-sama sent me to guide you to the temple, but there was an emergency with a lost child and I couldn't meet you at the gates. Unforgivable!"
Seeing the woman's harmless stance, Ranma relaxed. "Eh, it's ok lady, you can get us to the place right?"
While Ranma talked to her, I was… focused on something else entirely.
Blood Golem
Level: 10
There was no 'Seto Hinata' in her nametag, in fact, she had the nametag was displayed like a monster's.
This woman isn't human.
What does that mean!? Ambush? Trap? If so, then how is she walking over the temple's protecting barrier, why isn't it reacting to her? And she said she's there to show us the way to the entrance of the temple, that Seishuuin Shiori, the head Miko of this place herself sent her. Is she lying? Is she telling the truth?
There is a possibility for both, and not enough information to make a conclusion.
"Hiroshi?" Ranma called. "You're coming?"
I made my decision; I'll go along with it for now. The thought of attacking her in public and completely unprovoked leaves a bitter taste in my mouth anyway. And I'm pretty sure I saw her among the Miko fighting the Cardian Minon last time around, that hair is pretty distinctive.
"Yeah, sorry," I said, moving to join them. Thankfully, Ranma and I fought together enough times that he could tell my guard was up, so he raised his own as well.
The Miko took us to a path that circled around the building; it looked like it was designed to be used by tourist so fairly pretty but not very unique: there were wood walkways, with running water underneath, stone formations, decoration disguised as nature, some strategically placed benches for resting, and overall places that just begged for someone to stop and take pictures.
That's why it was so weird when we made some specific turns around the path, and all that artificial appeal slowly gave away to something breathtakingly beautiful.
The sound of distant conversations faded, replaced by the steady flow of running water and rustling leaves. The air cleaned suddenly, going from the usual Tokyo flare to the fresh lightness not unlike that of the countryside. The construction around us seems to grow older yet at the same time, it gained a vibrancy that went beyond a fresh coat of paint. Nature closed in, true nature this time, the temple grounds changing from something that uses nature to something built around nature, at each turn becoming more harmonious. The feeling of power grew and grew.
Ranma looked around confusedly, I didn't know if he's actually feeling anything but it was impossible for him to not notice the changes. The Blood Golem disguised as a Miko was making small talk to entertain us; she was explaining a bit about the barrier and how you needed to take specific routes to get to the real temple but I wasn't paying attention, too lost feeling the energies.
Yeah, I hadn't noticed this the last time, but this is definitely a place of power.
Space certainly distorted along our way, or this was how it actually was all along and we're only noticing now. We arrive at the exact same place we'd started, at the courtyards in the front of the temple; but there were no visitors now, only Miko and Priests positioned in an honorable greeting formation.
The Temple stood before us, heavier, larger, and more majestic than before, the elevation of the ground also seems to spread further; a mighty mountain rather than a mount.
Our Miko guide stepped forwards to stand beside the entrance. She bowed to us three times and the gesture was mirrored by some of the procession, it was clear this was a ceremonial greeting.
"You're ready?" I asked Ranma at my side. He nodded.
"Let's go."
-0-0-0-
"Welcome to Miraidochi-ji." Shiori greeted us with a deep bow. It hadn't been that long since I last saw her but her looks once again gave me pause; it wasn't every day you come face to face with a woman this beautiful, and with a voluptuousness rivaling that of Rin's.
She was dressed in a traditional Miko outfit but with some subtle embellishments to show her rank, and she was accompanied by six other women that I assume were high-ranking Miko like her. They all mirrored her greeting. "It's good to see you in good health, Ōe Hiroshi-san." She finished with a dazzling smile.
"Thank you. It's good to see you again." I said, a bit embarrassed. My eyes sweeping around the retinue of Miko that sat all around the tatami room. They are all blood golem, levels ranging from 10 to 12.
That made me relax a little bit; no way Shiori would have missed them if they weren't supposed to be here.
"You didn't have to arrange all of that, you know."
That meaning the treatment we got since we entered this castle-like temple. We've been, quite literally, clothed, cleaned, bathed, and just now finished a virtual feast before finally meeting Shiori. I've been expecting many things but the five-star-inn experience caught me by surprise.
Ranma had whined a bit, no doubt wanting to skip to the cure part, but he settled once he realized there would be food.
"Nonsense! You're our guest of honor, it's only natural."
"If you say so, Shiori-san." Should I take that as it is, or should I consider what it looked like, an attempt to stall us… Would that be too paranoid?
"Now then," She clasped her hands together. "Shall we move to the matter at hand?"
"Yes." Good, Ranma's starting to look a tad twitchy. I turned slightly towards him, careful to not break my formal kneeling stance. "Shiori-san, this is my friend Saotome Ranma, the one with the curse I wish to use my boon to hopefully cure. Ranma this is Seishuuin Shiori, I told you about her."
"… Nice to me you." He added stiffly, needing a second to remember his manners.
"Ara?" Shiori placed her hand on her cheek and softly tilted her head. "Sao...tome Ranma-san, right? My, that's a very distinctive name, I wonder… Could you be the son of Saotome Genma?" She asked with a kind, innocent smile…
A very kind, very innocent smile. A too kind, too innocent smile—
Oh fuck!
"You're mistaken ma'am, my father's name is Saotome Genjirō."
"I see, silly me."
It took all my effort to hide my incredulity. Ranma lied as naturally as he breathed.
Crisis averted for now, but it's still a fucking crisis! Fucking hell! What the fuck did Genma do!? How the fuck does she know him? From Where!? Why!? Oh god, I hope Ranma isn't engaged to Ena or something.
Shiori turned her attention back to me and then bowed softly.
"I must apologize to you Ōe-san. I should have asked for more details about the curse at our last meeting, but I was too distracted by circumstances. It was unprofessional of me."
I shifted awkwardly on my knees, suddenly remembering what exactly these 'circumstances' were. "It's perfectly fine." I tried to keep my voice even.
She nodded, turning to Ranma. "Saoto-ghu!" …Did she just… bit her tongue in disgust? "… Ranma-san, I must apologize to you as well, the lack of information has made preparations very difficult. We will need to consult with you about the curse before we try anything."
"It's fine, I just want to get rid of it."
She nodded once again, a smile blossoming on her pretty face. "As promised I was able to acquire the services of one of Japan's foremost specialists in the subject." Ranma actually blinked at this, he sent me a surprised look. What? He didn't know he was getting a specialist. Shiori waveed her hand to the side, adding a soft; "Please."
Two of the Miko sitting around the room swiftly turned around and pulled the large slide doors open, because of course they would be specifically positioned to show off. Half the point of Japanese formal manners is performance.
The door opens to reveal two individuals, one of which was scratching the back of their neck in embarrassment.
"Haaha, Shiori-san 'one of japan's foremost specialists' is a bit too much…"
…
… Not gonna lie, I'm a bit disappointed.
I was expecting someone equal to Shiori, like, with a heavy tangible aura of power and a distinctive presence, or at least one whose level was too high for me to see. Instead, what I see was a fairly normal-looking guy in his early twenties dressed in a Buddhist monk uniform; he didn't even look like a monk! If you told me this was a college dude in a monk cosplay I would've believed you. His companion was far more interesting, if only because she was a very attractive red-haired woman. She was dressed in a black and white outfit similar to that of a Miko's but not quite; the clothes fitted her much better than they did on the guy, she actually looked respectable.
Satonaka Ikkou
The Head-monk of the Saienji Temple
Level: 50
Nanbu Chitose
The Scarlet Nun of the Saienji Temple
Level: 47
Their titles weren't all that impressive either, and even if their levels are high, I have the feeling they are more like the 'mundane high' of someone who is skilled in a particular area, rather than powerful in general, like Tofu-sensei.
I tried to hold on to the fact that they are recommended by Shiori and try to not let my disappointment show in my face. The Poker Face skill was my friend there.
"This is Satonaka Ikkou of the esteem Saienji Temple, and his aid Nanbu Chitose." Shiori introduced the two while they stepped inside.
"A Buddhist monk in a Shinto temple…" Ranma questioned, making a face.
"It's weird right! That was what I was saying- Gihh!"
… T-The red-haired nun just kicked the guy on the balls, making him crumble to the floor with a comical cry. Ranma choked a laughter at the scene.
"Ikkou, don't be so overly informal! It's rude!" Said the girl who just burst a man's ball out of nowhere.
What the fuck?
"G-Gah C-Chitose, s-so you're still mad about this morning, I told you I didn't know it was your panties!"
"You shouldn't have been looking for it in the first place, pervert!"
"Are you telling me not treasure hunt when in a new place!? It's against my nature!"
The fuck am I looking at, seriously?
Ranma was laughing out loud now, but to be fair I think he was mostly releasing the tension he had accumulated for being the overly formal setting; he really wasn't built for that stuff. I don't know if his laughter was infectious or the scene was just that funny, but some of the nearby Miko started to giggle too.
That's a way to break the formality I guess.
Shiori, cheeks a bit colored from embarrassment, loudly cleared her throat. "Ikkou-sama, Chitose-san, if you may?"
The couple paused what they were doing – The monk wiggling on the floor trying to protect his dick while his aid tried to kick it again – and looked up. I could see the shame rising in their faces like a thermometer in the desert. They quickly cried out an apology and kneed before us, close to Shiori.
What can I say about this atmosphere? Confusing? A bit. Awkward? Oh definitely. But at the very least it was lighter than before.
The monk took the initiative, clearing his throat a few times before speaking. "N-Now, Saotome-san right?" We all began to sweat over the increase in killer intent in the room, so he tried again. "Ranma-san, right? What can you tell me about your curse? How does it afflict you?"
Ranma held a suspicious look for a few seconds - Yeah buddy I would also be questioning their competence after that – Before sighing and leaning forwards, falling out of his kneeling stance to a more comfortable cross-legged position.
"Well, when I get hit by cold water I…" He trails off, frowning a little, his eyes dipping down to the low table between us. I realized then, that this must one of the few times he talks about the mechanics of his curse out loud. All other times he just kinda show it or let others assume… So to actually vocalize it…
Shiori must have picked up on his discomfort. With a tilt of her head, all the other Miko rose to their feet as one and silently left the room, leaving only the four of us.
"You didn't have to do that," Ranma grumbled, but some tension left his shoulders nevertheless. "Alright, when I get hit by cold water I turn into a girl. Warm water turns me back to normal."
"And he attracts water to an extent," I added. At Ranma's confused look I explained further. "Think about how many times you get hit by random splashes of water. Do you ever see me getting hit by that amount? Constant water splashes are not normal Ranma."
It was almost like seeing someone's brain exploding by the sheer immensity of the realization. Never made the connection hm? I chuckled at the look on his face.
The monk furrowed his brow his finger tapping his chin. "That's a rather… physical manifestation. Do you feel any pain? Do you know if you act any differently while you're a girl?"
The questions continued, they were fairly basic and Ranma did his best to answer them. It honestly felt like seeing a doctor rather than a curse-breaker.
Eventually, however, the monk asked the question that changed things.
"Do you know where you got it?"
"Yeah, in a place in China called Jusenkyo." Ranma answered, already visibly starting to get fed up with the mundane questioning.
… I think the correct term for what happened next was 'mood whiplash'. The Shiori and the monk's aid had relaxed slightly on their position, content to let the monk do his thing while they enjoyed their tea. At Ranma's answer, however, the aid snapped her head to look at him and Shiori visibly tensed in her seat. The monk, curiously, only raised his eyebrow.
"Wait, you know about it?" Ranma asked, he also noticed the changes. "Man, we should have started with that!"
"… Changing shapes with water, no aggressive side effects, no mental influence, no visible spiritual disturbance. It fits." The monk's aid, Chitose, gotta remember her name, muttered under her breath. But it was quite audible considered we were close together in a silent room. Finally, she confronted the rest of us. "Jusenkyo curses change people into animals, they do not affect their gender." As someone who had watched the show, I was about to call bullshit, but the monk was faster.
"According to the research papers at least, and they are quite old." The monk, Satonaka, added he had placed a hand above his mouth and was now eyeing Ranma with an intensity he didn't have before.
Chitose bit her lips, looking troubled. "That's not a confirmation, there could still be other possibilities. "
"How would he know this name then?"
Ranma and I shared a glance. That was quite an interesting reaction.
Shiori cleaned her throat. "My apologies Ranma-san, but for the sake of confirmation, I'd have to ask. Have you acquired your curse by falling into one of the cursed springs in the place known as the ancient training grounds of Jusenkyo, localized in the country of China?"
A shiver went down my spine. I could feel that she did something; it felt like when I first saw her. When she recited a mantra that broke through the walls of reality.
She has weaved a spell in with her words again.
Ranma blinked at the odd way she worded the question. But it was clear he could feel the tension on the onlookers. He gulped. "Yeah, that's pretty much it."
There was a long moment of silence where his answer hung in the air.
"… How?" Chitose asked weakly.
Ranma looked at her strangely. "Hum. I just… walked there?"
There was the silence again.
… Yeah, no, this won't do, even my patience has limits.
"Stop," I said in a firm tone, my voice cutting through the shock and drawing attention to me. "Look, there is clearly some context here that me and Ranma are missing. Can one of you please illuminate us?" Instead of sitting there looking comically shocked, I decided not to add.
"Of course. My apologies." Shiori was the quickest to recover. "I'm going to assume none of you two have any idea of how China's supernatural scene operates."
At our headshakes she continued, clearly entering in the same mood she was on our last encounter.
"Very well then, I will try to summarize. Unlike Japan, where there are efforts made to keep the supernatural and mundane in relative harmony. In China, the 'mundane' side is just a front to show the outside world. There is no 'supernatural side' because there is no divide, and it's all technically controlled by an organization called the Holy Cult of the Five Mountains. I say 'technically' because their form of governing is rather… unique." Shiori paused for a bit to let the idea sink in. "At their core, they are a coalition of martial artists unified in a single purpose and value martial strength, doctrine, and the developing of their arts above all else. Because of that, they have reshaped China to fit the role of always providing challenges and opportunities for a Martial Artist to grow. Creating what is essentially Martial Artist heaven, if you will."
"Oooooh." Ranma let out a breath; of course, he'd be interested.
"You were literally there a month ago, dude." I couldn't help but add.
Shiori continues. "And the way they did that was… well, while they have sovereignty over all of China, they will gladly recognize the word of anyone strong enough to claim a piece of land for themselves, giving them free rein to do what they wish as long as they obey their terms and never turn their blade against them. The end result is that China today is a hodgepodge of Martial groups, tribes, minor kingdoms, sects, and dynasties, all locked in constant conflict for supremacy and dominance over one another. Basically a never-ending Segoku state with the Holy Cult of the Five Mountains making sure it stays that way.
"Oh, man!" Ranma exclaimed excitingly. I just sighed and shook my head.
I don't want to say it sounds like Xianxia… but it sounds like fucking Xianxia. Those goddamn chinese novels with their godawful protagonists seem to follow me wherever I go, and the fact that I now live in a world where there is a place that works by their logic makes me angry. I wonder how well a regular person's life is in this version of China.
Wait, wasn't there a Campione lady acting like king of China or something? Is she the one Xianxiaing the land? She must be the one Xianxiaing the land. That bitch.
"So, how this relates to our situation?" I asked.
Shiori, blinked at me, her cheeks coloring slightly. She got carried away, hadn't she?
"My point is that in this ever-shifting landscape of alliances and wars, it should have been very difficult if not downright impossible for Ranma-san to reach Jusenkyo. Practically every Chinese faction guards the location of their mystic places jealously; they are not places a wandering martial artist can simply walk into, especially not a non-native one. So how exactly did you get there?"
We all looked at Ranma, waiting for his answer. He just shrugged in a casual manner.
"Like I said, I just walked there. Pops got a flyer with the location from somewhere and we just went. There was even a Guide and everything."
As the three more mystically knowledgeable people in the room try to wrap their heads around this, I added my own question.
"And what about what we just heard. All those factions and wars. Did you notice anything like that?"
He pursed his lips in thought. "I mean… not really. Oh, there were martial artists everywhere, like, way more than in Japan, that's for sure, but they were the usual bunch. A few weird groups here and there but nothing that… Wait, wait, wait! I think there was one that could have been one of these big factions; tribe full of women, can't remember the name, they tried to kill us for eating some of their food, one of them chased us around for a while, but we managed to outrun her in the end." He nodded, proudly smiling at himself. Joyfully unaware of how spectacularly this was going to bite him in the ass in the future.
"That complicates things." Monk Satonaka said. It was the first time he spoke in a while, this entire time he just looked at Ranma, calculating. "Ranma-san, Japan's… no, the entire world's knowledge about Jusenkyo's curses are very sparse for the reasons Shiori-san stated. It's very rare for someone to have the curse, and it's even rarer for them to make it out of China. You're the first one in almost ninety years I believe."
I must confess the thought of a Jusenkyo curse being 'rare' is hard to wrap my head around having watched the Ranma ½ anime. But then again, I could kinda see it if we take things up to a larger context. The show had, what, less than ten cursed people in it, what if they are the only ones in the world? I can see it if that's the case.
"So there is no cure." Ranma made the connection, his fists tightening on his sides.
"There is no documented cure." The monk corrected. "… But I wish to make an attempt."
"Eh?" Ranma looked up.
He continued, "I can't promise you a cure. Unfortunately, there are some curses in this world that are completely incurable for one reason or another. What I can promise you is that I will study it, I will analyze it, I will discover how it works and why, and if it's possible, I will develop treatments for it, something to mitigate the effects or help you control it. And if there is a cure, believe me, I will find it. That is, if you allow me, of course."
The guy has changed; his posture, his behaviors, even his presence has changed. It was so subtle I hadn't noticed until now, but somehow this guy went from a perverted monk to someone you can't help but straighten your back and pay attention to in minutes.
Ranma reacted as expected. "S-Sure! That's what I want." He was even smiling now. "Oh man, now you got me pumped! So what the next step."
"Ehh?" And just like that, the monk was back to his old self, I was able to see it this time. "Hum… Ah well, I suppose a few cleaning ceremonies won't hurt. Shiori-san there is a mountain spring in the back we can use, right?"
"Of course, Ikkou-sama, please feel free." Shiori smiled.
Guess we're putting Ranma through a Buddhist cleaning ceremony now. I moved on to follow my excited friend before Shiori pulled aside.
"Ōe-san, a moment of your time, please?"
"… Sure."
God, please don't be about Genma! I'd hate to find out that I insulted her by bringing his son here, and now I had to help her kill him or something… And please don't be about that thing we did at our last meeting. God, this is awkward.
Ranma gave me one last look with a raised eyebrow, but went with the Buddhist monk and his pretty red-haired aid anyway. Leaving the Milf Miko and me alone in the room.
… And the first thing she did let out a giggle, her posture relaxing from a stiffness I wasn't noticed.
"That was quite intense, wasn't it?"
What? The conversation? "That's one way to put it, I guess... I must confess, Satonaka-san isn't what I was expecting."
"Oh, I'm well aware of the impression he gives." She waved her hand like we're gossiping. "But I assure you his talents are unmatched! If there is one person able to find a cure for a Jusenkyo curse it's him."
"I'll take your word on this, then."
"You should." She nodded, satisfied. "Now, for the reason I wanted to speak with you…" She pauses to take a deep breath. "Ōe Hiroshi-san, the History Compilation Committee wishes to hire your services."
Wait, what's it? Can't say I was expecting it.
I tapped my fingers on my knee, considering her proposal,
"What for?" I asked.
"For the ability you've demonstrated." She replied. "Are you familiar with the concept of Oumagatoki?"
I raised my eyebrow at the question. I did, in fact, looked into the subject because it kept being compared with my Illusion Barriers. But the lack of a phone or any easily available computer made that difficult. Library research is hard when you can't simply eat books until you get what you need.
"They are the last moment of dusk that stretches for far too long, said to be the time where Yokai walks the human world," I explained what I knew. Pretty sure it's what inspired the Dark Hour in Persona 3. "That's what I managed to find." Information is pretty sparse about this subject in particular. Like, less than footnotes.
"They are pockets of wandering realities compressed into invisible bodies that serve as a gateway. They could be considered Yokai, but Kai to be a more precise term for them, more of a phenomenon than a living being, though many manage to acquire sentience or even sapience if they exist for long enough. Yokai are attracted to them so they usually end up with a population living inside their body. That's the reason for the association." I nodded at her explanation. So, basically, an Illusion Barrier that attracts Yokai then… I wonder if there is a difference. Were the monsters from my Illusion Barrier real Yokai? But that would mean… I pushed these thoughts aside for now.
"Overall, they are very useful. The problem is that they are a naturally occurring phenomenon; there is no telling when or where one might appear. It's very common for a normal person to get lost in them and that's usually… deadly."
I looked back at our first meeting, trying to find where she was going with this. Considering that we were in an Illusion Barrier that she believed was a natural Oumagatoki, and what she said to Ena…
"Being able to break these Oumagatoki is not a common thing, is it?" I concluded.
"…Entering and exiting, simple. Completely erasing it, like you did." Shiori shook her head. "Days of work, minimum."
I sighed, I suppose some of the most exoteric aspects of the Gamer System are bound to be discovered eventually. "So you want to hire me to deal with these Wild Oumagatoki."
"Essentially yes."
… Fuck, I want to do it, I remember the first day of my new life, dealing with that portal to another dimension that appeared out of nowhere even before had my Illusion Barrier-related skills. I'd almost died, if I hadn't had the gamer I wouldn't have been able to escape, if I hadn't had the gamer I wouldn't have been able to recover from my injuries. If a completely normal person stumbles inside one… yeah, I can see how it can be a problem.
The issue is Milf Miko herself. I like her, I genuinely do, I can't say I fully trust her yet. She's showed herself to be too sneaky for my liking, with that tracking spell and all that show she put on our imprompt date to gather information. I can understand why she did that but being on the receiving end does not inspire confidence.
And there the HCC itself; they are portrayed very positively in the Campione Anime, but I don't know much about them, plus they are a government organization. If there isn't at least some corruption I'll eat my shoes.
"To be honest Shiori-san, I'm hesitant to tie myself to any organization right now—"
"Oh, it's not like that at all, Ōe-san." The Miko interrupted me. "You won't have to sign anything or take any oath, this is more of an association than anything, a freelancer job if you will. The HCC operates in a supernatural scene that values its independence very highly, we are used to this." She puffed her chest, proudly laying a hand over it; it was a very interesting sight. "I will personally ensure you are treated fairly and always have the right to refuse or break off at any time if you feel inclined to."
"Hoh." I raised my eyebrows, "That sounds a bit like special treatment."
"Kukuku, let's just say I like to maintain good relationships with promising young men with great character."
… Wait, did I just catch her red-handed about possibly spying on me.
"And how can you be so sure I have a 'great character'." I confronted.
Shiori's green eyes sparkled in amusement. "Well… you have shown clear interest in a service that would save people's lives and hadn't even spared a single moment to think about compensations…"
…
…
"A-And what would you give me in return?"
She smiled. "Beyond monetary compensation for each job, the HCC will provide free consultation and advice on supernatural manners, a liaison for contact with friendly supernatural communities and access to special shops and libraries that would otherwise be very difficult to find."
That seems… much for a freelancer job. Is it like that for every person the HCC wants as an associate with, or just me?
… And fuck I want that, just the access to special libraries would be a game-changer for me, maybe I could even find a Magical teacher or something to cover all my bases.
She got me, and she knew it.
Damn it.
"Then, I look forwards to working with you Shiori-san."
"Likewise Ōe-san." The Miko beamed. "… Even if you are a bit of a lustful beast."
Hah! I knew she would bring that up! But if she thinks she can turn me into a blushing mess with that weak shit she got another thing coming.
"Ah, it seems our previous meeting left you with an erroneous impression of me, Shiori-san. That was simply how a true man acts in the presence of a libidinous lady." My grin held promises. "Especially one so receptive."
Her reaction was simply delicious. "O-Oh my—"
What happened next, happened in an instant.
I was enjoying the sight of an embarrassed Milf in a sexy Miko costume in a moment and in the next I was on the ground, my mind unable to process anything other than the sheer weight of something that pressed down on me and very soul grind from the pressure. After an impossible long second, it was gone, the very air left dense and heavy in its wake.
Spiritual Senses leveled up!
Spiritual Senses leveled up!
"What in the world—" I croaked out, but Shiori has already left, I was barely able to catch a glimpse of her robes flapping as she disappeared behind the doorframe, quickly making her way out of the room.
I pushed myself to my feet and dashed after her.
It was misty in the corridors, the air so charged with what I'm quickly coming to recognize as Spiritual Energy that it was visible to the normal eye and provided a very real resistance against the body. It was insane! Almost like running deep underwater.
I did my best to follow Shiori across the maze of corridors, only managing to catch glimpses of her up ahead no matter how fast I ran. I ignored the unconscious bodies on our way because if I took my eyes off the running Miko, I would lose her.
Finally, She stopped in front of a large, open door to what appears to be the back of the temple and just… stared. Within moments I was beside her and— What the fuck!?
Chitose was on the side her hand firmly palming her face, but I barely noticed her presence.
Ranma was a girl again; she was sprawled on the rocky grounds looking up with a wide-eyed expression. She was wearing one of those pure white kimonos made for rituals, only it was completely drenched in cold water and clinging to her naked body like a second, semi-transparent, skin. For once, this wasn't the most eye-catching thing in the room.
The monk Satonaka was… floating.
No, not floating, he was being held off the ground by an intense aura of white energy that stretches for almost a meter from his body. Under his feet, an ethereal lotus flower was taking shape. Over his shoulders, a large halo of light was forming. He held his right hand in a single-hand mudra while his mouth moved in a long, elaborated mantra that seems to lack any words but sent shockwaves with each syllable.
Satonaka Ikkou
The Head-monk of the Saienji Temple
Reincarnation of Kōbō-Daishi
Direct decendant of Siddhartha Gautama
Level: ?
What the fuck!?
-0-0-0-
A monk that goes Super-Saiyan when he gets aroused, really?
After hentai ninjas who change personality depending on how much they're dressed, martial artists that change genders with water, and Nerima's general daily life, you'd think Anime Japan would be out of things to surprise with, but nope! There I go questioning my sanity again. Guess this time it's on me for underestimating the craziness of this place.
I unfolded the futon over the tatami floor, taking a moment to admire the ascetic of room Shiori had provided us; it was bigger than my current apartment and barely smaller than my childhood room, impressive all around. This place really can double as a high-quality inn. The only thing missing is an onsen, and it would be straight to travel books.
Good thing they had this room available; the shenanigans of this afternoon had stretched long enough for us to miss the last train. Shiori, then, promptly offered us the temple's hospitality for the night, like it wasn't her plan all along. We could have taken to the rooftops to get back to Nerima, but the food was fucking amazing, the installations were great, and the company was nice, so we stayed.
Pity Ena-chan was visiting a friend in another part of town; I'd like to see her again.
Ranma was on cloud nine since the afternoon. That blast of overpowered-fuck-you-super-Buddha-exorcism-beam wasn't enough to purge the Jusenkyo curse – which set some worrisome implications because holy shit – but it managed to… nudge the thing a little bit; basically, it slowed down the transformation and allowed Ranma to stay submerged in cold water as a man for almost a full minute, which was insane to see after having watched a show where the immutability of the Jusenkyo curse was one of its core pillars. To say that Ranma was happy was an understatement if the silly dance and gleeful laughter he kept breaking into was any indication.
Sure, the curse had 'snapped back' to normalcy thirty minutes later, and none of what they tried next worked, but the strong start was just what Ranma needed to stay in high spirits.
It also led to a funny phone call where he told his father and the Tendos he was sleeping out. Shouts could be heard from the phone but he was too chill to get angry and basically trolled everybody with vague answers. It was epic enough for a high-five.
"What do you think they'll try tomorrow?" The martial artist asked in a dreamy tone that sounded hella creepy to hear from him.
I thought about this for a second. "They will have more time to prepare, so I think they won't try to cure the curse outright but try to see what makes it tick instead, maybe by analyze how it reacts to different rituals or ceremonies or something, that's what I would do." I shrugged, "But I don't know how they do things, so it can be anything."
I laid down the futon and felt my body practically melt into its surprising softness. I don't have to sleep anymore, hell, I don't even get tired in the normal sense of the word, but I still get the overwhelming desire to rest after a long day. "Sorry they couldn't cure the thing in one go, I knew you were expecting that all week."
Ranma hummed, he hadn't taken his eyes off the ceiling. "I was being stupid. I can see that now after all the failed attempts today. Never thought this thing was such a big deal." He pinched some strands of his long hair and raised it in front of his face. "But hey, least they fixed my hair."
Oh yeah, apparently Ranma had a curse that made his hair goes Rapunzel when it got released from this dragon whisker thing he was using to tie his pigtail. I don't remember any of this shit in the anime, so I wonder if this is one of those details that got lost in the background. In any case, I now have a Dragon artifact in my inventory and Ranma can wear his hair down again.
He looks a bit weird like that, but his female form looks drop-dead gorgeous.
"Hey, Hiroshi," Ranma called.
"Sup?"
"Thank you for this, really."
"You already said that remember?"
"Yeah but…" He plays with his hair a little, "This is real… Like, I always thought I had to deal with this on my own. The Tendos don't care and it isn't their problem anyway, Pops won't lift his lazy ass for it, I think he even like being a panda. So it was just me; I thought I'd have to swim to China eventually or something. But then you came and just drop this on my lap. Put me on the right track when I didn't even knew where to start." He let his arm drop to his side, "Urg, what I'm trying to say it's that this means a lot, ok!"
"It's alright Ranma, I get you," I said with a smile, making myself comfortable on the traditional Japanese pillow – something I would never be capable off without the OG Hiroshi's memories, those things take some use to.
There was a brief moment of silence between us. Then Ranma starts again, his voice a lot more hesitant.
"Why… why did you do this anyway?"
"…Isn't obvious."
"Hiroshi… I had friends before, you know? None of them would arrange something like this. Heck, we hadn't even known each other for very long, so why?"
That's the question, isn't it? I think… I think the answer is deep and yet really simple at the same time. I like Ranma. He was one of my favorite characters growing up, watching his show was one of the highlights of my day, and that feeling only grew when I got to know him personally and realized he's a genuinely good guy. Knowing what he went through, what he will go through, how miserable and chaotic his life will become for the sake of laughs, it's only natural as a fan of the show that I would want to help.
But there is another reason, one that I can actually share with him because it has nothing to do with the Meta.
"… To be honest, this whole thing was the result of a spur-of-the-moment thinking." I confessed. It was true, I didn't expect to find a monster that night, I didn't plan to save Ena, and I didn't think I would gain a boon for it. "I just… saw the opportunity to help you and took it, it's only natural." I shrugged, and that was that.
"Does this explain anything?" I asked, hoping I hadn't blown things with him; I hadn't really prepared to have an emotional talk with Ranma of all people.
"…Yeah, I think it does." He answered softly.
There was another beat of silence.
"You better not snore, you hear. I have enough of that with pops." Ah! Nice to know he's not gonna let this end in mushy feelings, that's gay as shit.
"Dude, you snore louder than me."
"And how the heck would you know that?"
"You have the face of a snoring fucker."
"Screw you, man. Good night."
"Night.
And with a smile on my face, I turned to my side, ready to put an end to what was overall a pretty peaceful day.
-0-0-0-
Fuck you.
Fuck me.
Fuck everything.
Peaceful fucking day, why the fuck did I think of that!? Of course the universe wasn't going to let that go. It was like slapping Murphy in the face and insulting his mother!
"Oi Hiroshi what the fuck is going on!? Where is everybody!?" Ranma yelled.
We've been rudely awakened by the ground literally shaking under our innocent sleeping forms. Any thoughts of earthquakes went out the window when we saw freaking veins growing out the wall. Now everything is glowing red like a shitty gothic club, blood, and other fleshy bits are spurting out of every surface, and there is no one but us in this entire complex.
My instinct suddenly screamed from me to move but Ranma reacted faster, next thing I knew he was pulling me out of the way as the wall immediately at my side exploded.
A humanoid thing stepped out of the dust and debris, it looks remarkably like a person; tall, muscular, wearing a short kimono, a pair of lines tattooed on each arm. Only the face confessed its true nature, its brow was swelled and veiny like a vampire from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, it's eyes were too wide and pupils so small they're practically non-existent, in his mouth there were rows and rows of shark-like teeth that he made sure to lick when he saw us looking.
Blood Golem
Level: 45
Oh, you got to be kidding me!
New Quest: Trials of The Heaven Oni.
You have attracted the gaze of one of the most powerful beings in the country; pass the trials to show your worth!
Rewards:
20.000 exp.
Vastly increases closeness with The Heavenly Oni.
?
Failure:
Vastly decreases closeness with The Heavenly Oni.
Localized memory wipe.
Vague yet persistent sense of disappointment
Accept/Refuse.
A/n: Some further info to avoid confusion:
Miraidochi-ji is the public name of the Temple of the Heaven Oni. I made a brief mention of that on chapter 6, part 2
No, this china isn't as bad an a Xianxia novel, Hiroshi just jumped to conclusion.
The silliest aspects of Jusenkyo like the Jusenkyo Preservation Society and the catalogue of silly Jusenkyo items still exist, they're just aren't that known outside China.
I really wanted to go into the true nature of the Jusenkyo curse, but it got scrapped with the rewrites, another time then.
