I'm sorry about the delay guys, some stuff happened that affected my free time, energy and motivation, but here's the chapter I hope you like it.
Chapter 18
To say that the Nerima Wrecking Crew's headquarters changed over these last two weeks would be like saying there was an underground hamster conspiracy threatening to overthrow the human race.
The place had always been odd, the building was huge, had surprisingly well-equipped facilities, a vast storage housing a strange collection of random stuff I couldn't even begin to fathom the purpose of, and was located right at the border of a residential, a commercial, and an industrial district in a gross abortion of urban planning that somehow translated in the place having a prodigious empty space both at the front and the back right in the middle of fucking Tokyo. But before, these details only revealed themselves over close inspection, it looked completely normal to the outside viewer.
This wasn't the case anymore. The delinquent infestation had completely transformed the place; the front yard was lined with a series of random bullshit brought in from the outside or taken from the storage, ranging from the mildly useful stuff like outdoor tents, a picnic bench, and a freaking gazebo of all things, to the complete useless like garden gnomes, stolen road signs, and the back half of a sports car. The backyard was dominated by a large boxing ring put there to cover a cracked magical circle that was never there and will never be mentioned again, and because it was so distinct, it ended up attracting material that would fit a 'training area' theme like training dummies, martial art poles, and a few extra gym equipments. By the corner, there was an empty area marked with a large red 'X' where I frequently placed an Illusion Barrier and threw whoever wanted special training or annoyed me enough in.
The building itself had been assaulted by the more artistically-inclined delinquents and a proxy war had been waged as to whose graffiti would dictate the main theme, in the end, a Chinese 'flaming' aesthetic won the day – still think Ranma had something to do with it somehow – so the place was now painted in a garish catalog of burnt orange, bright red, golden yellow and black for the contrast. It all depicted a silhouette of a dragon on the right side and a tiger on the left, the beasts seemly lunging around the building to meet at the front, but their crash was prevented by a different drawing.
A giant wrecking ball shattering a brick wall with the stylized letters NWC engraved at its center. The Nerima Wrecking Crew's official symbol.
Needless to say; this wasn't a place you could just walk past anymore. You had to stop and gawk at it.
It has character now.
… The yards could do some work, I admit, but the paintwork was pretty neat.
My group didn't stop to take in the view or greet the oddly low number of delinquents that were lingering around the area, we just stepped through the iron gates and made our way directly to the building without further delay.
Though my Cardians didn't have the same hurry, so they both broke off to do their own things. Falion running off to find someone to annoy/tease/terrorize like she usually does, and Minon going around the building to jump into the Illusion Barrier and see who was in the grind today.
The insides were… similar to the outside, but not in every aspect. Oh, the first couple of days it had threatened to end up as the exact type of mess you'd see when you concentrate a lot of delinquents in a closed-off space, but me, my baseball bat, and the literal beatdowns I'd delivered upon them eventually taught my gang to not fucking leave trash in the living space. So, while it was a bit disorganized, it wasn't the complete pig house it could have been.
The layout was mostly the same as the original but there was a lot of stuff brought in to personalize the place, this time tending to be tasteful and stylized rather than the random, throw-together mess from the yards, but more importantly, it was clean; no cigarette butts, empty cans, or half-eaten foodstuff.
Though I gave up trying to prevent the porn mags from appearing, there was just no end to them. My solution was to collect and put them in a series of magazine stands at the far corner. We would just have to deal with the judging female stares it would no doubt provoke in the future.
I saw the reason why there were so few people outside then; most of the guys were inside—
"OHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Crying out like monkeys as usual, I see.
"Sup." I greeted the closest one, causing him to turn around and start a chain reaction.
"ANIKI!"
"ANIKI IS HERE!"
"GOOD MORNING ANIKI!"
"HI THERE RANMA-NII!"
As always, their enthusiasm and sparkling eyes were almost endearing, even though it came from a crowd of war-veteran-like, middle-aged-looking middle schoolers. They opened a way for us to pass and see what this commotion was all about.
… Alright, at least they had a reason for their excitement this time around.
"Is that what I think it is?" I asked, looking at the pile of boxes, already with an idea of what was inside. Mostly because a Haruka and a grinning Touji were standing by it.
"Behold Aniki!" He exclaimed proudly. "I told you, I'd do it!" He put his fists on his hips and struck a pose, my Kohai just rolled her eyes at his side but it was clear she was also in good spirits.
Both were wearing a matching set; Touji, a black gakuran-like outfit with golden embellishments and chains around his hips and shoulders, red-colored gloves and footwear on his hands and feet, and Haruka a black and white seifuku that was similar to the one she wore for her school but with a sharper shoulder-line, shorter skirt (But still going past her knees) and short sleeves. She didn't have the red shoes, choosing instead to go with a pair of knee-high leather boots, but her hands were covered by the same bright red, fingerless gloves Touji had. On both outfits, the Nerima Wrecking Crew symbol was prominently displayed, including a particularly large example in the back that Touji made sure to twist around for us to see it.
My eyebrows rose almost to my gelled hairline and a bit behind me Ranma began to laugh. "I'll be damn— You actually managed to get us uniforms." I didn't need to put any effort to sound impressed.
"Told you, didn't I!?" Touji punched his muscular pectoral and admonished playfully. "You should have more confidence in the great Touji-sama, Aniki!"
"Oh, I knew you'd get something." My eyes sweep across the outfits again. Goddamn, they looked good! "I just didn't expect to be of this quality!" Even the packaging was professional.
"Hehehe, Hitomi-chan and my Oba-chan helped me out!" He said, embarrassingly rubbing a finger under his nose.
Boy, let me tell you; the usual shounen character's abashed gestures really don't work if you have a mustache and a patchy beard. Still, I turned to address the crowd around us, noticing how silent they'd gotten.
"What, you're waiting my cue or something? We got uniforms now, come get yours!"
That did it. With another loud monkey yell, the rest of the gang surged forwards to grab at the pile of clothes. Provoking just the kind of happy mess you'd find on European football matches, fight clubs, and store aisles on black Fridays.
I was too sturdy to be knockdown by something like that so I and my closest associates simply flowed to the corner like loose stones in a running river.
"Here!" Haruka materialized from somewhere and greeted me by shoving a package against my chest. "That's yours!" She shouted over the noise.
"Hi there, you look good, by the way!" I shouted back.
She grinned. "And what do you know about fashion, Evil Elvis!?"
That set me into a fit of chuckles. Taking a moment to look around I found Ranma chilling over one of the cabinets with an open back of chips in his hands. "And you! Do you want one!?" I waved the package in his direction.
Ranma gave me a shrug, reached down, plucked one of the uniform's jackets from a nearby delinquent, and threw it around his shoulders without bothering to put his arms in the sleeves. It was the closest Saotome Ranma got from wearing a school uniform.
Good to see joining a Delinquent Gang had taught the boy some manners.
After that, there was a round of posing as the guys tried out the new uniforms, including a wave of enthusiasm as I finally put on mine.
It was darker than my Furikan uniform, heavier too, and not only because of the thicker chains and larger embellishments, the material itself was tougher and more resistant, I wouldn't go as fact to say it could act as an armor, but I could see it stopping a blade in the right circumstances. The pants were also way looser than what I was used to wearing, not parachuter pants (thanks fucking god) but definitely a more 'delinquent' pants; the last piece I needed to complete my 'delinquent set' if you wanted to be poetic about it.
The red shoes fitted well enough, but I decided against the gloves. I wasn't a gloves guy, and I figured my usual crimson undershirt was appropriate enough for the black, red, and golden theme we're apparently going with. So, it all worked out brilliantly.
Nice distractions aside, we eventually had to move on to business.
I dropped down on the main chair of the studio's meeting room, which by happy coincidence was located right behind my truly garish and oddly imposing – as in 'having an imposing oddness' – delinquent throne, so away from view. Manifesting my inventory screen right above the long table, I let a series of stick-figure-shaped paper fall off from it.
What the Japanese consider a 'shikigami' was a truly vast and diverse collection of creatures and objects. The particular type I could produce was a pseudo paper spirit made from magic, ancient scripts written in a blood-laced paint, and apparently spiritual energy – not that I ever felt anything more than the usual tingling feeling during the process – as impressive as it sounds, it really is the most common type, with the disadvantage that they had to be activated as soon as you finish writing the scripts, otherwise the mythical properties that would draw spiritual energy from the atmosphere would cease working as paint settled, making it useless. That problem was solved by simply chucking them inside my inventory. If it could keep warm water warm it could keep magic blood paint fresh, was my logic, and it worked.
With a handsign that had a remarkably similar effect to an incantation on my internal energy reserves, all the little paper figures stood up on their own and promptly shot up to the air and floated through the window. The scripts written across their form served as 'programs' to set their commands and behaviors patterns; they will fly towards and settle in key points along the NWC's controlled territories in the Nerima Prefecture where they would work as a primitive surveillance system. It didn't produce the same results a dedicated system of cameras would, of course, but if something dangerous or weird happened they would send framed 'visions' of it to the nearest of their fellows until it reached the closest NWC member.
It was a little time consuming to set it up, but it complemented well with the new patrol rotation we got going. And I only needed to replace them every two days or so after the old ones burn themselves out of existence. It'd already brought in results in the increase in the number of troubles my guys got themselves into, something I was no doubt about to hear.
Ranma and Haruka were the only ones with no visible reaction to my overt usage of magic- err, jutsu. Touji and the other Crew leaders weren't quite used to it yet.
"We're not exactly pressed for time, but I'd like to keep this short," I said to the six sitting around me. "So, what's going on? Give me your reports."
Yes, this is basically a review meeting, and yes, the irony of this bunch of delinquents going through something a salaryman does is hilarious to me and part of the reason why I'm insisting on this.
Part of the reason, of course, we do need to consistently plan our approach if I want my gang to be more than a group of well-meaning hooligans that are good at fighting.
Three new faces shifted uncomfortably, not really knowing what they should do. Understandable given this was their first time in a meeting like this, but Haruka and Touji were in the last one and had an idea of what I wanted. Ranma just kinda leaned back and pretended he was too cool for all of this.
"We're growing a lot, Aniki!" Touji started off with his usual enthusiasm. "Got some stragglers from my school, and I know Takato and some of the guys managed to do the same. There are also some that just seemed to pop out of nowhere!"
"Kuno-senpai's brother was scaring away any prospective delinquent around the area, but since we started doing rounds many are beginning to appear from Nerima's schools to join us." Haruka took over from there, she had her notebook in her hands and everything. Not surprising given she was the only one taking notes during the last meeting and was the one who suggested bringing in more people in the first place. I'd joked about it a few times, but she really is the one most eagerly diving into this delinquent life, at least when it was related to the gang. "We managed to get two guys from Ōizumichō district, by the way."
My eyebrow raised, "That's good. Do you have a total?"
"… Forty-eight." She responded while ignoring Ranma's mocking snores.
So more than double what we used to have.
"Gojiro." I suddenly addressed the leader of the Dog Walking Crew in an attempt to bring him and the rest to the conversation before it could process further and make them feel alienated rather than confused. The big guy snapped to attention, looking surprised for having been called, or that I remembered his name. "There were some conflicts with the new guys a few days ago, right?" I prompted.
"… Ah, yes." He raised a massive fist to his mouth and cleared his throat. "… They were, hm, not satisfied with our methods. Some of us attempted to talk, including myself, but… well, we know how it ended up."
Nerima Wrecking Crew's first internal conflict.
"Hn! Fools content wallow in the dark rather than conquer the dark within." Commented Iseyama Hachiro, leader of the Elderly Assist Crew. You only need one look at his fake eyepatch, crimson high collared cape, and manner of speaking, and you'd know what his deal was all about.
Ironically, he was one of our best fighters.
"They're gonna be trouble-trouble later! We should hunt-kill the fuckers right now!" Spoke Kitagai Nezumi, leader of the Street Cleaning Crew and by far the shortest and scrawniest person in the room, perhaps in the entire gang.
… I'm trying really hard to not make any assumptions from his strange speech pattern, and the fact he looks like a mouse, and how he's the only one who'd requested to keep some monster parts, and how his title went from 'Overlooked Delinquent Underling' to 'Amateur Delinquent Alchemist', and the way he kept bursting into fits of evil laughter… I just decided to keep my eyes on him and be glad he's on our side.
"They were beaten and kicked out, that's enough for now." I raised my voice. "But there is a reason I brought this up. If any of you have any complains or have trouble with me or the way I do things, we will sit down and talk. Heck, we can fight it out if you want. But I don't want any other shithead throwing a tantrum like they did."
I don't even care that they attacked me, but the fuckers ruined Mayeda-san's teahouse in the process, fucking ingrates.
The delinquents, save for Ranma and Haruka, went starry eyes. Ugh, how did I unknowingly dazzled them this time?
I glanced at Haruka for answers, she was good at making sense of things when they got like that. At my look, she sighed in exasperation.
"It was a well-organized coup. The fact that you were able to deal with it so easily is impressive."
That's what this is all about? I just whacked anyone that attacked me into unconsciousness until there was no one left to whack. The fact that their titles changed to 'Renegade NWC members' only quickened with the process. "Putting that matter aside, what else do you have?" I asked the table in general once again.
Thankfully, the previous interaction was enough of an example for them to get what this was all about, and they started to speak up.
From the more mundane matters.
"Todo-san's son will be traveling to Hokkaido this weekend, maybe we should put some guys in the area in case he needs any help with his shop. His back isn't the best and…"
To the more formal.
"We need a Quest board ASAP! It's too hard to keep track of every task, Aniki! And we should make it big enough to be used as a weapon!"
To the more absurd.
"B-But think-think about all the money!"
"We will not make a Kappa fighting ring and that's final."
"But it would be FUN!"
To the mildly concerning.
"… What?"
"Err, l-look on the bright side Aniki. That public bathroom isn't haunted anymore!"
"… Because one of our guys is dating the ghost lady."
"Because one of our guys is dating the ghost lady."
And so, the actions and movement of the gang were discussed, suggestions were made, plans were laid out, orders and guidelines were given to be passed down to the ones below, all while the atmosphere never getting too formal or professional, in fact, most reports turned into boisterous posturing, intense chatting, or near fights, with increasingly louder reactions from the table. I very much prefer this way.
As always with these kinds of things, the most important subject was left for the end.
"So, what's the situation with Ragnarok?" I asked. "Have they been poking around again?"
That prompted an exchange of looks across the table, I didn't like that.
"We… err, we don't know Aniki." Touji sheepishly admitted. "We've been so focused on inside stuff that we didn't really look outside of our territory. Beyond repelling the odd guy trying to test us I mean."
"There's been no further attempt after the Valkyrie's pathetic and humiliating defeat." Bolstering much, Kohai-chan? "In fact, there were no more attacks from any organized group outside Nerima. Only from smaller Nerima fringe gangs our territory doesn't reach."
A complete stop in all activities after a direct blow to one of their elite forces. Yeah, they either chicken out which is unlikely, or…
"They're preparin' their assault." Ranma casually vocalized what we were all thinking. He was still maintaining a relaxed posture when he turned to me. "Oi, Hiroshi, let's attack them first."
That suggestion was met with loud approval from the male portion of the delinquents in the room, but Haruka looked conflicted.
"I don't know… they have hundreds under their banners. We're strong, yes, but with this numerical difference…" She gave me a look, as I was usually the one who went along with her on the more reasonable takes. But
I shook my head this time. "A decapitating strike might be the best strategy," I said, and as the rest didn't have that much grasp on English terms or English in general, I explained. "We avoid their main force go for their strongest, these Eight Fists, and their leader. Cut off the head of the snake before it can attack."
Because if there is something Nerima doesn't need, are hundreds of thug-looking youngsters larping as a conquering army marching on its streets.
"""OUWWWWW!""" Oh, come on! It was Ranma who suggested it!
"… I suppose it would be better for them to not come while we're still establishing ourselves." Haruka conceded.
"Let's shoot them with challenge arrows!" Ranma sniggered.
"A most honorable method indeed!" Hachiro nodded dramatically, while Nezumi spit-take at the mere thought of losing the opportunity for a surprise attack.
"We're going to need information first!" Haruka cuts in before the rest of the table could derail the subject further. "Their bases, their current movement, what are their notable members, anything we find about the Eight Fists, where the heck they are." She whipped her head around. "Touji can you contact your old gang?..."
I smiled as I watched the vital discussion starting and leaned in to give my own input.
In the end, it was decided that questions will be asked, old contacts will be consulted, and the patrol route modified to get us closer to our neighbors. Nerima Wrecking Crew will, for the first time, reach outside its borders after two weeks of frenetically dealing with internal problems – not that the internal problem will ever stop, this is Nerima after all, but the focus was shifted a bit – to get any info they could about Ragnarok in preparation for our attack. And with that, I declared the gang's second review meeting – not that I call it that out loud, of course, it's war council if anybody asks – a success.
But, to be honest, I didn't expect them to get much, at least not when compared to Rin, who I would send on the same task as soon as I had a moment alone.
I wanted Ragnarok dealt with as soon as possible, so I could turn my focus to fortifying Nerima, there were already too many minor situations to deal with here alone.
But first, there was a special appointment we needed to attend today
And tomorrow… Shiori's Temple, I wanna see the Shiratori. We should be clear for a visit then.
No rest for the wicked, as always.
-0-0-0-
"There is no cure."
Unlike my two friends who were sitting straight trying to convey a measure of respect for the powerful woman they were meeting for the first time – while trying not to gawk at the near-transparent, sensual dress she was wearing – I was leaning against the wall, enjoying the show of Japanese manners meeting the western's refreshing no-fucks-given attitude. But the abrupt declaration made me tense. It was like a punch to the gut.
And if it had this effect on me, I can't imagine what must have been like for Ranma. In fact, the guy nearly launched himself from his sitting position.
"WHAT!?" He shouted, surprise, outrage, and anger swirling in his voice. I got the impression that the only reason he didn't attack, or at least got on the woman's face and shouted at her, was his deep-seated survival instincts telling him this was a really stupid idea.
Thankfully, Lucretia Zola grew sympathetic rather than offended, maybe she glimpsed something in Ranma's reaction I couldn't see from my position. She was annoyingly perceptive like that.
"Alright, let me put this another way… As far as my knowledge and experience go, there is no cure." Lucretia waved her hand as she added as if to ask, 'better now?'.
Not a single bit. Not for Ranma. I knew that before he even drew his breath to start his, no doubt quiet and colorful, rebuke. Luckily, Haruka knew him well enough at this point to see that to pull him back a bit, preventing another test on the patience of the most powerful witch in the world. It was enough time for me to reach them and sit on Ranma's other side.
From up close I could see that his initial fighting impulses had passed, he was still focused, but it was an argumentative kind of focus instead.
Taking the initiative and giving my friend time to take in the information and formulate a better response, I asked.
"Can you explain your reasoning to us? How did you reach this conclusion?"
Fucking anime tropes of starting explanations with a shocking declaration, man, it's just asking for someone to start something and not hear the rest.
Lucretia sighed, shifting a bit on her couch-throne thing that looked soft enough to swallow someone. "To summarize a complicated subject. Most curses leave a trail or a trace of their existence within a person's essence. It's how a cursebreaker can detect if a person has a curse in the first place." She smiled. Here comes the boasting. "Most mages need a ritual to properly see it, but a witch such as myself needs only a glance!" Here we go. She even made her left eye shine a bit for dramatic purposes.
She does that a lot when she's teaching me too. Often comparing the subject of the lesson to Witch Magic and how it was superior. It would be endearing if she wasn't so damn cagy about what the fuck Witch Magic even is.
A long finger with perfectly manicured nails was placidly pointed at Ranma. "But your curse; this 'jusenkyo curse' has no trace. Nothing, nada, niente. If you'd come to me saying that this gender change is a unique ability he was born with, I'd have believed you." She pulled her hand back and flicked her long orange locks over her slender shoulder. "And that only happens on two occasions; one, if you spend enough time with the curse, decades at least, and come to wholeheartedly accept it as part of yourself, or…" She paused for dramatic effect, it's probably her main point. "Two; the traces of your curse simply cannot be felt with mortal magic, which means your curse has divine origins."
I let out a long breath. Well… I'm not exactly stunned but I can't say I expected her to take that route. I'm not stupid enough to outright discard her opinion on the matter, but Jusenkyo isn't a place that I associate with freaking Gods, I mean, the place is so silly.
"That's wrong, lady." Ranma made a face. "The Guide said it started with some girl who drowned in the spring two thousand years ago or somethin'."
Lucretia frowned slightly - which probably means I should intervene next time Ranma gives a snappy answer, or he would spend the rest of the day as a lawn chair - and waved him off. "There's more than one spring and all have similar stories, right? Then the effect is probably in the land itself and the springs are only different ways it manifests. It's most likely the aftereffects of a battle between a God and a Campione or even the direct effect of a Divine Authority in the work." She blinked, her expression turning pensive. "Actually… it might be worth checking out if this is true. A land affected by Divine Authority lasting thousands of years. Basically another Stonehenge…" She muttered to herself.
She seemed convinced of her own theory at least.
"So, no cure," I stated, bringing the conversation to the main point before her thoughts could wander off.
"Right, yes." And Lucretia was back with us. She snapped her fingers at me. "Only things on the level of Gods and Campione could ever hope to affect it."
"Only if you're right about it…" Ranma said, thankfully not as confrontational as before, if anything he looked thoughtful, staring intently at a point on the ground.
Lucretia shrugged. "You wanted my professional opinion kid. That's it."
"Ano." Haruka's cheek colored when the gorgeous witch's attention turned to her, but she kept her cool. "I don't know what a Campione is, but we do know where to find a Kami, would he be able to affect the curse?"
Lucretia stared at her for a second, then her gaze shifted across to Ranma and me. My Poker Face Skill keeping my face neutral. "Wait… you don't know- Shiori hasn't… Of course, she hasn't…" She pinched the bridge of her nose and shook her head, before looking back at Haruka. "No, Japanese Kami can't work on a curse like this… well, the vast majority of them, at least. the Gods I'm referring to are a specific kind of god." There she turns to address all of us, her tone gravy and heavy, making the seriousness of the topic very clear. "There are a lot of beings out there that could be considered gods or call themselves as such, but the gods I'm referring to, the one that everyone that carries weight in this world recognizes as such are the Heretic Gods."
She took a moment to let the name settle in. "They are immensely powerful beings born from the collective thoughts and beliefs of every sapient creature and are largely considered the strongest type of beings in this world. They usually stay in the Netherworld – a realm created from the accumulation of the energies of the mind, body, and spirit of all creatures – living inside their myth and legends, but sometimes they step into the material realm, where their presence alone causes death and devastation for miles, very much like living natural disasters. Leaving their legends is considered a heretical act, hence the name." She took a breath. "And sometimes, crazy circumstances happen, and a human manages to kill one. In this case, the human has their body transformed, and steals some of the god's powers from themselves, these are called Campione, and yes, there are also many that consider them to be the strongest type of beings in the world, there's a whole pointless discussion of the manner." She waved her hands to show her. "Anyway, those two types of being? Heretic Gods and Campiones? They are above everyone else. Their strengths and powers are frankly unfairly powerful, and they are highly resistant or outright immune to anything below their league. Which is why anything on this level can only be affected by its peers."
Right, already knew that and more, of course, but it's interesting to hear it from the mouth of one of the Campione anime's characters, even if the speech was a quick summary that didn't get into the nuances. The info managed to make an impression on Haruka and Ranma though. My kohai letting out a little 'Oh', while my martial artist friend placing his hand on his chin, lost in thought.
An old question popped up in my mind and I saw the opportunity to get an answer. God knows I won't be getting it from the source.
"But why Shiori would keep something like that from us?"
I mean, I already knew the information, but she had dodged the subject when it came up if I'm remembering correctly.
Lucretia gave me a look. "Because you are hot-blooded Japanese teenagers. She was probably trying to keep you from doing something stupid."
Well, that's just rude.
At that moment, Ranma snapped his fingers.
"So, we gotta kill a god and become this 'Campione' thing to deal with the curse, got it."
"Oh, come on!" I couldn't keep the shout inside. "Can't you see you just proved them, right!? We can't kill a god without preparing for it!"
He frowned. "I know man, we go to get stronger first!"
"Exactly!"
"Yeah!"
"Oh, you poor thing." Said Lucretia to Haruka, who just smiled in response.
"You learn to roll with it."
I blinked a bit at this random interaction- Oh, oh fuck— I mean, yes! Quite the funny anime bit I deliberately set it off! My ability to see and control anime tropes grows every day!
"Moving on," I said quickly. "To summarize the situation; Ranma's curse is too badass for anyone other than the strongest in the world to cure it." Lucretia rolled her eyes at the way I put it but conceded the point. Ranma perked up a bit because he's the kind of guy who liked the word 'badass' attributed to him, even if it's for something he doesn't like. He's simple like that. "One question though; there are hundreds of springs in the Junsekyo valley, no doubt there is one that turns people into boys, what if we travel there and throw Ranma in it, would that counteract his current curse?" That was the implied 'cure' presented in the Ranma 1/2 series, I wanted to see what Lucretia had to say about it.
"Extremely risky." Was her answer after a few moments of consideration. "There are some rare cases where the effects of multiple curses cancel each other, but it only happened with very minor curses, for one of that level with an effect so prevalent…" She shook her head. "There are too many factors to say for certain. The effects could activate at the same time forming a half male and female form. The curse might turn the body into two things at once causing severe cellular breakdown. Yes, maybe the new curse would counteract the previous one. It depends on how Jusenkyo works." She shrugged. "My advice, if you want to try that, if to bring an animal with you, throw it in two ponds first and see what happens first before trying with your friend." Ruthless and practical, I like it.
Ranma listened intently to that, and to my surprise, he had something to bring up in the end.
"I've been in contact with some people tryin' to help." The people from the Saienji Temple, I realized, the perverted super monk and his red-headed assistant. I'm surprised he didn't share their names. "In their last letter, they mentioned getting' in contact with a water Kami to try somethin'. Do you think this will help?"
I raised my eyebrows. This is new for me. So, they have a correspondence going on, hm. Well, they did say they'd be in contact.
"Depends on the Kami," Lucretia said professionally. "They won't find a cure like that but tackling the trigger of the curse is a smart move. Something that would let you have more control over the transformation would be ideal. Ah, but I'd warn against total prevention, a strong curse like yours wants to be triggered, and going against it for too long is… unwise. I'm sure you noticed something like that around affecting your life."
"Somethin' like that." Ranma agreed, climbing to his feet. Then he surprised us all by bowing in respect, an almost unthinkable development for anyone who saw how hostile he was at the start of this conversation.
Ah, the wonders of acting like reasonable adults rather than letting dumb anime tropes set the course, I never get tired of seeing it.
"Thanks for that, witch lady, if you 'xcuse me."
… Well, it's a start.
It didn't take a genius to see that Ranma was still wound up tight by the revelations. Putting things in his perspective; it would be like he'd gotten a hopeful and optimistic diagnosis for a disease he's struggling with from one team of medics, but when his friends convinced him to get a second opinion from a different specialist - always a good idea, by the way - he's gotten a far bleaker one.
No cure. Or at least not one within his grasp.
No wonder he'd all but stormed out of the room, nearly crashing on Lucretia's weird robomaid in the process. That he actually made an effort to pay respects at the end says a lot.
With him finally away from Lucretia, I relaxed some of the tension I didn't realize I was building up. Having an angry martial artist with no filter and a proud Italian Witch with a flimsy temper in the same room was a stressful experience. I was dreading that Ranma would strike a nerve and got Lucretia to lock him in his cursed form as punishment or something, this is how it usually goes when Ranma mouthed off some magic practitioner in the anime. Thank God we caught Lucretia in a great mood.
The witch in question finished snipping on her tea and clicked the expensive-looking cup back on the table.
"So, let us move on to the next case." She said, looking at Haruka.
My kohai hadn't heard it. She was too busy staring fixedly at the robot dressed in a maid suit finishing setting the new set of snacks and tea on the table between us.
Yeah, I also stared a bit on the first day. Regretfully, it didn't look human enough to be considered a robot waifu; it looked more like a transformer… or a medabot.
For the umpteenth time, I silently wondered what was up with Lucretia Zola's new technological connections. I don't remember her having those in the Campione anime, so it's definitely had something to do with the crossover nature of this world, but there were simply too many sources it could have come from to say anything, heck, taimanin has sci-fi elements too.
That wasn't the time to explore this, though, so I just nudged Haruka out of her stupor.
She expertly hid her flinch, as expected of my cool kohai.
"Hm, if you allow me a question Zola-san," She pointed at the retreating robomaid. "What is— no... How and why?"
The witch chuckled. "Oh, it's just an investment that paid off, don't worry about it." Yeah, that vague shit was pretty much the same thing she told me when I asked. "Back to the subject. Gelboy here tells me you're having some odd dreams."
Your nicknaming skills are truly something to behold, Lucretia-san. I would have died laughing if this wasn't a serious matter. Ha. Ha.
Haruka only told me about these dreams to me recently, and the way it sounded made me believe it was something to do with her hidden powers and seeing as that makes her essential to the survivability of the world, anything related to it must be treated with the utmost seriousness.
Especially with how she told me her dreams were going lately.
"Hai." She said, straightening herself. "I've been having these stranger dreams for the last few years now. They are always foggy, and I can't hold on to many details after I awake, but from what I managed to remember… I'm another woman, always engaging in military action of some kind, fighting… killing… and, hm…" She briefly glanced in my direction as if seeking permission she didn't really need. I nodded anyway. "After I met Hiroshi-sempai, they'd stopped for a bit, but then they returned in full force and the last few ones… um, I'm pretty sure I saw Hiroshi-sempai in them— And believe me I am aware of how that sounds." Ranma still hadn't let her live that down and I don't think he's ever will.
Haruka sighed, "If it was only that I wouldn't have bothered coming here today, but…" I watched her reaching with her right hand and grabbing the object beside her. She was still awkward with it, her discomfort clear for everyone to see, yet her wiliness to carry it around with her says a lot about her conviction to face what was ahead.
She showed Lucretia her new shinai; a straight-bladed bamboo sword wrapped in purple cloth. "Recently, I've been able to bring forth, to harness some of the woman's skills. It allowed me to do some pretty amazing things with a sword even though I'd never even held a blade in my life. That's when I knew my dreams were more than me going crazy." She chuckled self-deprecatingly before staring coolly ahead again. "I was hoping you could shine a better light on this phenomenon, Zola-san."
The Italian witch seemed to be relaxing back on the couch as Haruka's explanation went along, only quipping her eyebrow at the very last part. She had an answer on her lips already.
"Well girl that sounds like a clear-cut case of a reincarnated soul. What you're seeing in your dreams are the memories of your past life."
"Reincarnation," Haruka mumbled, meeting my eyes as I also turned to look at her.
And then, we both visibly slumped in our seats.
"… You knew that already?" The witch stared at us. Dangerous, best not to seem like we wasted her time.
"No, not at all!" I answered quickly. "It's just one of the possibilities we raised when Haruka told me about it." Boy, I remembered that. About a week ago, Haruka looked guilty for some reason, Ranma rubbing in that he told me so, me trying to stay calm and think rationally…
Lucretia nodded. "It has all the common symptoms. Admittedly, though, this sounds like a particularly strong case; most of the time when that happens the person has no idea that it's happening in the first case and will only share a few minor characteristics with the person they were in their previous lives. Dreams of past lives only happen in some rare cases, but to actually be able to pull a skill or an ability from them… those are remarkably unique. I can only think of three other cases." She hummed, looking at Haruka with a new light, "You must be pretty similar to who you used to be."
A deep wince, and Haruka had to pull herself back up. "I don't know how to feel about that Zola-san, but thank you, just having a confirmation as to what this is makes a lot of difference… But, hum, what about Hiroshi-sempai? Like I said, I'm starting to see him in my dreams too."
"Oh." Lucretia waved her hands dismissively. "That just means you two met and were close in your previous lives. Maybe you were close friends, or bitter enemies, or passionate lovers." Her suggestive grin made it clear what she was betting on. "Romantic, no?"
… Come on kohai, don't let out such cute sounds! You're supposed to be cool and unflappable, do not fall for the teasing of the horni witch! Do it like me and hide the blush by aggressively sipping on your tea.
A round of tea was tasted by all after that. It was good fucking tea.
"Zola-san." A more composed Haruka called out once again. "I'd hate to impose on you after you're already helped us so much, but… Is there a way to stop these dreams? Can you do something about it?"
Lucretia took in a long breath as if she expected that. Her professional air was back.
"The answer is yes for both questions, however, the methods to suppress or even remove the memories of one's past life are often long, extremely invasive, always leave severe consequences. Plus, they are well beyond the scope of a favor for a talented non-apprentice, I'm sorry girl, but I can't help you with that."
I clenched my teeth. Damn, I was not expecting that. By the way she sounded, it doesn't seem like this was a gentle, or easy process. I watched Haruka's fists tightening over the shinai. Fuck.
"Can't you do something to help, teach? Anything?" I asked.
She met my gaze for a couple of seconds before she sighed.
She raised her hands, palms up as if holding something, and then, after a distinct 'POP!' echoed, she suddenly was.
I narrowed my eyes at the display. It was her weird-ass retrieval spell, I'm pretty sure it was the same one that got me out of the Illusion Barrier. Been trying to learn how it works for weeks but she's smugly cagy about it, and I can't even feel the magic moving when she does.
"This should help." She announced, holding a dangling circlet made from carved wood and decorated with colorful feathers.
"A dreamcatcher?" Haruka mumbled. "I already tried that; it doesn't work."
Lucretia rolled her eyes. "This one will, it's the real deal, not something you'd find in the mundane market— well, not normally, I'd heard some rumors about Japan's odd tendencies… anyway, it has a charm in it that will nudge you to have pleasant dreams, suppresses bad ones, or at least push you to have a dreamless night. It works best against outside influence, but it can filter abnormalities from the inside too."
My kohai was focused on it now.
"So, it will help." She said, more to herself than any of us. "Um, the little net in the middle is missing…"
"That's because you'll have to thread it yourself to establish the connection." Lucretia closed her eyes. "It will work, trust me on that."
The little artifact was tingling my mystical senses even at the distance. It was magical, no doubt about that. I grabbed Haruka's shoulders reassuringly, feeling how tense she was as she worked out her hopes and expectations. "Thank you," I said to Lucretia.
The witch shrugged a grin appearing on her lips. "You have shown me a very interesting trick. This is merely repaying the favor." The fingers of her other hand moved, a flickering shine appearing between them as a Light Sprite was created for a second before it melted back into her skin. Goddamn, she was already on that stage!? It took me half an hour to create my first sprites only after I gained a skill for it that I managed to shorten the creation process to a few seconds.
I'm surrounded by Saotome Fucking Ranmas aren't I?
"Now come closer girl, let me teach you how to thread this properly. It's not often that I part with one of my magical items you know, so I'll see to it that you'll use it correctly!"
After that, thankfully, things became steadily less tense to the point that Lucretia and Haruka began to actually get along. Sharing stories of our delinquents' deeds and answering questions about magic will do that, apparently. At some point, I became worried as to where Ranma ended up and left the room to search for him.
Finding him at the front of Lucretia's house dismantling her security robots nearly gave me a heart attack. But I reasoned that there was no way she didn't know Ranma was breaking her stuff, and the lack of a response might as well be a tacit permission.
So, I joined him, because, hey, fighting robots was cool!
Unfortunately, Lucretia's reason for allowing us to do that soon became clear and the robots' self-learning AI network began to turn the table on us.
And that's how the rest of the meeting with Lucretia went, the girls talking over tea and the boys waging war against Skynet.
It was a fun time.
-0-0-0-
There was a certain state of mind you enter after finishing all you'd have to do for the day and the knowledge that you don't have anything else to do and you can finally relax and settle in. It's a type of balancing act where you take a moment to plan what to do with your free time while also keeping in mind what you had to do for the next day. Because there are always more commitments and duties waiting for you, but for now, at this moment, you can take it easy.
It was more common in my past life when I had a job and bills to pay, but it's coming back now as I pick up more and more responsibilities for myself. Not that what I have requires the same level of professionalism as an official job does, but even then, I had to put on a face the entire day, I had to look calmer, more certain, more stoic, and more in control than I really was. And now, as we left Lucretia's domain and entered the busy streets of what I now knew was the Suginami ward in the late afternoon, I could finally let out the long sigh I wanted to let out the entire day and simply decompress.
In this case, this decompression came in the form of a beautifully designed handheld device flashing with images and sounds that stoked the flames of nostalgia in my soul.
"I don't get the point of this." Ranma, now in her female form, declared. The filthy heathen. "Why drag us to a toy store to get this game? It doesn't even control right, the characters don't move when you press the damn button!" She tapped the back of her hand on the screen of her brand-new Game Boy.
"It's turn base. It's different from the ones at the arcade." Haruka reported. Unlike my filthy barbarian friend, my kohai was calmly playing the game and making good progress. "You're supposed to catch monsters and then use them to fight your battles, I read an article about it."
That's one way to summarize one of the most iconic - or would be most iconic – games in the world, I suppose. I'd felt the need to correct or add to her statement. But it didn't matter. I was playing Pokemon.
I was playing Pokemon freaking Red, barely a month after launch day!
Oh, you can bet I was inside the store as soon as I walked by the poster, the personification of my childhood would have jumped out of my heart and beat the crap out of me had I not. I think I also traumatized my friends and some of the nearby kids and parents with the squeals of happiness I let out. But I got my hand on it, and I made Ranma and Haruka get it too.
The noises! The graphics! The clunky device that feels awkward in your hands!
God, this game is shit.
And I love it!
"That's because you're not trying." I chuckled out loud and both of my friends looked worried about how it sounded. I placed my new Game Boy on the charming little table of the booth we secured ourselves in and leaned towards my favorite shortstack. "Let me see what you are being a wussy about."
"A wussy!?"
And just like that, I turned Ranma into one of the world's first competitive Pokemon players. Just as planned.
My righteous paranoia had me looking up to the doors of the cafe and the customer getting in before looking down at Ranma's game screen. Nice place, this café; we let Haruka decide where we'd go, and, as always, her café-finding skills were on point. It wasn't Hannah Millers, but the atmosphere was nice, the menu's pictures had us salivating, and the waitresses' glorious pencil skirts that were so tight they almost made a perfect impression of their behind had us salivating for a different reason.
The only thing ruining the experience, and what was making my paranoia flare from time to time, was the utter lack of conflict we had coming here. Usually, when I go to and from Lucretia's place, I encounter heaps of angry delinquents from multiple gangs trying to get in my way and make my life difficult. Sure, the numbers were steadily decreasing as it became clear they could do jack-shit against me, but there was always someone at least watching and making funny faces at me as I went along.
Today there was no one, nothing, nada. Right when you'd think the numbers would increase with me showing up with an actual gang uniform and accompanied by two others. Nobody impeded our path or challenged our 'incursion' to what was apparently 'contest territory' in any way.
So, I was… jumpy.
The heck happened? Did the fighting end? Did Ragnarok or another gang establish themselves here? If so, where is everybody, and why they aren't around?
I didn't like it one bit, but I wasn't about to chase after vague feelings. Keeping my guard up? Sure, but if I start to run after everything I thought looked fishy I'd go crazy really fast. So, I tried pushing these feelings aside and focus on what was in front of me.
Ranma's Glorious Tits Pokemon.
"You're trying to fight Brock with only a Charmander, you dolt. Fire is weak against rock."
"What!? None of what you said made any sense!"
On the seat in front of us, Haruka wrinkled her nose a bit, blue eyes not leaving the tiny screen.
"I think he's talking about the elemental weakness bit; fire is weak against the first gym guy… But who in the world is Brock? And what's a Chamandoru?"
… Fucking Jp names are corrupting my friends.
"Takeshi and Hitokage." I conceded. Christ, it was like washing your mouth with acid, and I have reference for that!
"Oh." My blond kohai gave me a strange look but decided she didn't want to poke that. "Anyway, Ranma-sempai, if you choose fire you should probably catch another pocket monster to use in the first gym battle. I choose Fushigidane so I had an easy win, but I don't know if I could have managed if it was a fire gym."
She's saying things that are hurting my soul. Maybe this was a mistake? Maybe I should have waited for the North American release.
"This is dumb. Fighting games are better."
Et tu, Ranma?
"It's not bad." Haruka settled her game on the table and raised an eyebrow at Ranma. "You do know there are fun things where fighting isn't involved, right? You're becoming a stereotype."
"I don't want to hear anythin' from you, miss cute, helpful kohai."
Pfff!
"C-cute!? I'm not cute!" Ohh, she showed weakness.
"Please, you're adorable!" Critical Strike!
Hehe, Haruka turned pink at that. I can't get a reaction like that from her anymore, she'd grew took used to my antics, but Ranma, it seems, was a new enough presence to slip past her guard.
Or perhaps this was something to do with an attractive redheaded calling her cute.
Both, most likely.
"You better not let Akane-san hear you say that." I magnanimously knock my kohai out of the spotlight with a snigger.
"What does she have to do with anythin'!?" Ranma huffed but couldn't quite keep the inflection out of her voice. "If you're pullin' crazy fiancees into this let's talk about Kuno's sister!"
Ugh. "Kodachi isn't my fiancee, she just does whatever she wants." A resigned Haruka nodded at that.
Ranma gave me a teasing grin that looked way too good on her girl face. "Oh, but does she know about your ninja girl?"
"Somehow, I'm not surprised that you have a ninja, Sempai. Should I worry about that, I wonder?" Haruka interjected before I could answer.
I laughed at that. "You met her once, actually. Remember the woman that was with us after we rescued you from Tōtōsai's place."
By the look on her face, she definitely remembers.
The conversation continued from there. Just idle chat about random, meaningless subjects with an uneven level of attention paid to each one.
Pokemon, school stuff, the new uniform of the gang, new moves we're learning, funny incidents that happened over the last few days. There was bickering and teasing, and a pause as a waitress with a charmingly striped blouse and a tight pencil skirt brought our food…
In general, we just sat there and talked.
It was the kind of memory you look back fondly in the years to come, if not for the half-remembered details, then for the sheer feel of it.
And it was a good distraction, a nice way to unwind a bit before going back to the more serious matters.
"So." I started, pealing my eyes away from the retreating waitress who'd just cleared our table. "How are you guys? With Lucretia's findings, I mean. I know she can be blunt..." I trailed off, deliberately giving them space.
"I'm ok," Haruka said, volunteering to be the first in Hiroshi's Healthy Communication Train. "I said it back then, but just knowing there's a cause helps immensely."
"What am I missin'?" Ranma asked.
We told her the gist of it.
"Ah, so it's just your past life or somethin'. Not you. You're your own person." Was the martial artist's casual conclusion, I couldn't help but smile at that.
"I know, it's just..." Haruka was also smiling, but it was a conflicted thing. "It's frustrating. I feel like there is more to it, like there's a lot that I'm missing. And the worst part is that I can remember after I wake up, I know what to think then. But any realization I make just snip away minutes after, and all is left is..." We watch as she paled and shook her head. It took a few minutes for her to get her composure back.
… But she did.
Dear Lord, she did.
"I... I don't like that woman. I don't like how she surrounds herself with war and pain. I can't even remember the reason why she fights, or if there even is one... But if I can't help having her haunt my dreams then I might as well use what she can give me to fight for something I believe in."
Several moments passed as Ranma and I just continue to stare at the expression on her face.
"Oi Hiroshi, she does that on purpose or what?"
"Not yet… And I fear the day she begins to do."
"Guyyys!"
It's amazing how easily she can break into an embarrassed mess after making our hearts go Doki, Doki.
She'd make millions as a hostess... probably billions as a host...
Haruka being Haruka aside, I turned to stare at Ranma. Who, in turn, met my gaze with a challenge.
"What?"
"Why so defensive?"
"I'm not defensive, you're projecting."
"Am I?
"Are you?"
"I don't think so."
"You sure?"
"… Just tell me what's on your mind, dude."
Ranma snorted. "Lame." She leaned forwards, putting her elbows on the table and unknowingly pushing the distracting swell in her red Chinese shirt into a near button-bursting point. "So, we got to kill a god."
Shiori, I don't blame you for keeping this information hidden. In name of every hotblooded Japanese teen, I apologize.
"That's a bad idea."
"Haruka smartly stated the obvious." I narrated out loud.
Ranma had the gall to roll her eyes. "I already said I'm not doing right now! I'm not dumb!" Said the teenager planning deicide.
"Zola-san said they're the most powerful in the world. Do you think you can reach their level?" Haruka asked.
"Duh!"
I chuckled at that response. "You got the right attitude, at least. But do you even know where to find one?" I knew they pop up randomly and create havoc in a large area, but Ranma didn't.
"My mom swears she saw Buddha and that actor from Edward Scissorhands shopping in the fruit market near our house."
We could practically hear the record being scratched. Both Ranma and I turned to Haruka with incredulous looks.
"What? I thought it was crazy too!" The blonde said defensively. "But with those crazy things happening lately there's a chance that's is legit!"
"Right," Ranma said, amusement flickering in her blue eyes. "First, we train like our life depends on it, then we train some more, then we kill Buddha at Haruka's fruit market."
I could see that she was taking the piss at that at least, but I couldn't tell if she was fully joking about killing a god.
But then again, she wouldn't be Saotome Ranma if she didn't at least consider it. I grinned and shook my head.
"Let's keep our minds open for the other solution shall we. What about going back to Junsekyo and looking for the drowned guy spring? Why don't we try that?"
For me, that always sounded like the simplest solution for the curse, when I was watching the anime, I mean. Why didn't Ranma drop what he was doing, said to the people around him he was going on a journey, but he was coming back to prevent any freakouts, and just travel back to Jusenkyo to get to the damn spring? Hell, why did he leave Jusenkyo without asking the guide for a cure, or if there was a guy spring for that matter? Oh, I know that the answer probably is 'because there wouldn't be a show if that happened' but now that this is part of my life and not some anime on tv, it didn't hurt to ask.
To my surprise, the martial artist grew agitated with this line of questions.
"Ranma...?"
"Look." She enunciated, taking a couple of deep breaths. "Jusenkyo was a really stressful time for me alright? Things kept happening one after another and Ryoga being there explains a lot." She hissed that part under her breath. "I might have... rampaged a bit and pops and that guide guy only found me after two days."
I blinked, slowly putting the pieces together.
"Wait… so you don't know where it is!?"
Ranma, for the lack of a better word, cringed.
"I wouldn't go that far." She protested. "I know what the region is, and I know the village we stopped before going there! I'm sure if I were there personally I'd know where to go. But if you ask me to point it out in the map, hm—" She clamped out rather than admit it.
I'd lose my head if I said that out loud, but it was adorable.
"Why didn't you just go back? You said you had a guide, right?" Haruka popped in asking the right questions.
The redhead frowned, "It wasn't that simple! We were hungry as hell and the guide told us that there was this amazon village nearby that might have food, so we decided to go there first. We did end up getting' food but turned out it was a tournament prize or somethin'. Then a crazy chick challenged me for it and when I kicked her ass she kissed me on the cheek and swore to kill me! After that, the chick kept chasin' us everywhere and we couldn't stop in one place for too long or she would find us. It got bad enough pops and I couldn't go anywhere without her breakin' everythin', we couldn't even train properly. So, we got sick of runnin' around without rest and swam back to Japan!"
"What- kill you!? -wait you swam to Japan!?" My kohai couldn't keep out with Ranma's sudden motormouth, apparently.
Also, hey, an abridged version of the Shampoo story. This reminds me of a question I always wanted to ask.
"Wait, you defeated the girl the first time, right? So, why run? Couldn't you just beat her again when she popped out?"
"I did! Multiple times!" Ranma threw her arms up in a picture of frustration. "When she saw she wouldn't get me with duels she started to use underhanded tactics; comin' at us out of nowhere, layin' traps on our way, attackin' us in our sleep, it was infuriating!"
Damn, I could see Shampoo doing that, if she doesn't play fair in love, it's unlikely she does so in war.
Still, interesting stuff to know.
"Err, shouldn't you be worried this girl would follow you here if she's that persistent?" Haruka apparently decided to focus on one matter at the time for the sake of her sanity, and once again she went for the most pertinent one.
Ranma waved off her worries. "Nah, we threw her off our tails pretty hard the last time, and we bailed from the country. She's never findin' us."
I don't know if I should grin in amusement or wince in sympathy, knowing what would happen in the future.
"Ok, so first of all; you totally jinxed that," I informed her, because there is never a bad time to lay out a good joke. "And second, all I'm getting from that story is that we will have to search for a bit to find the place when we go there."
It took a few moments for Ranma to realize the implication.
"Wait, we're going!?" Her mouth hangs open.
"What kind of question is that!? Of course, we're going. I only need to sort things out with Ragnarok and make sure the Crew won't implode or turn evil while I'm gone and I'm ready to go whenever. Heck, we already killed enough monsters that each can afford plane tickets ourselves, no need to swim there."
"We still have school, you know?" Haruka pointed out.
"We're delinquents, you know?" I countered. "Wanna come?"
My cool kohai tapped her fingers on the table for a bit "… Yeah sure, I'd have to talk to my parents first, but I don't think they'd go against it. Don't know if that should worry me or not."
"Hey assholes don't go planning crazy trips on my back, I didn't even decide if I want to go back yet!" Ranma complained very loudly.
But there was a big smile on her face and that said every that needed to be said.
The martial artist became even happier with what came next.
"Here're your desserts! I deeply apologize for the delay, there was an incident in the kitchen…" The cute waitress finally came back and placed our orders on the table.
And among it was the sole reason Ranma had decided to dine in her female form in the first place. A large glass jar stretching longer than my face, full to the brink with ice cream, cake, red fruits, cream, and gingersnap crumbs, artistically arranged into several layers of sweets and goodness.
"Strawberry parfait!" Ranma singsonged in a manner she'd died before admitting having done it. A spoonful of the dish nearly set her quivering in pleasure. "Finally, some advantages to being a girl!"
"Rude." Haruka stared at the show, her eyes dropping to her modest slice of pie and back to Ranma's enormous parfait. "… I don't get it?"
"Hm!" The redhead placed the thing back on the table to speak, she had already wolfed down half of it. "I can't order this fruity stuff as a guy, you know. There are things that men can't be seen eating!"
The blonde didn't respond, she just raised her fork and pointed at me…
And my own strawberry parfait.
I deliberately kept my little finger raised and my posture impeccable as I elegantly brought the spoon to my mouth.
Fuck Da Rulez.
"Hiroshi doesn't count, he's weird." Bitch, I'm alpha—
…
… Now, one good thing about being a paranoid fuck and having the feeling being vindicated again and again, was that even during a nice hangout between friends I didn't fully lower my guard. This basically meant I was watching the figure in a full-body travel cloak and large backpack pretty much from the moment they stepped into the café.
I was able to see them enter, go to a waitress, attempt to communicate – which caused the waitress to call another waitress – then turn and freeze as they caught the sight of our booth.
The cloak and the backpack barely started falling to the ground before Ranma kicked the table to intercept the now leaping figure mid-air. I rushed forwards and grabbed Haruka by the blouse before pulling her away.
The table exploded in the air and a second later the booth we were in was obliterated in a boom that shook the entire building and opened a huge crater in the floor.
Among the dust and the shocked customers, the figure rose. A weapon in the form of an enormous metal sphere with a long handle was embedded at the center of the crater, an identical pair twisted in the other hand. They wore a colorful silken outfit and a crimson torso piece that did nothing to hide the prodigious figure and had voluminous hair that fell back in a bluish-purple cascade to reveal beautiful, exotic features locked in a furious sneer.
"Ranma!" The familiar and iconic girl roared, blood-red eyes promising murder. "I kill!"
You got to be kidding me!
Shan Pu
Fierce Princess of the Joketsuzoku tribe.
Level: 31
"S-S-Shampoo!?" Ranma gapped while I had a minor mental freak out.
What in the world is she doing here!? I mean, I knew she would appear eventually, but while I knew jack-shit about Ranma1/2's official timeline – or if the thing even exists – I knew the exact circumstances where Shampoo was supposed to appear. It was when Ranma and Akane were going out somewhere, in Nerima. We're not in Nerima, she isn't supposed to—
You know what? Fuck it! There is something vastly more important than the angry amazon in the room right now. I whipped my head towards my stunned friend.
"Hey Ranma! Is that the girl who was chasing you in China, Ranma!? The one you just said couldn't find here, Ranma!? Isn't that crazy, Ranma! You were just talking about it, can you believe it, Ranma! Hey Ranma, the thing you said it wouldn't happen, happened, Ranma! Ranma!? Hey Ranma!—
"I GOT IT HIROSHI, SHUT THE HELL UP!"
Hehehehe, satisfaction!
A/Note: And so Hiroshi's deliquent's looks is finally complete. It's basically Metal Bat with a few golden line, bright red shoes, and the NWC symbol in the back and a smaller on the left side of his chest, above the heart.
Heeere's Shampoo!
I was actually planning something complex and elaborate to introduce her, but my Muse went keep it simple stupid and here we are.
Edit: Changed the name Xian Pu to Shan Pu, cuz I like it better.
