Chapter 57
Later that day…
Han was still working on the Falcon (as his beloved ship seemed forever destined to be in a state of disrepair) when Leia snapped. Her previous outburst of frustration paled in comparison to the absurdity of her current activity. Leia was cleaning.
If it were not for her pregnancy, Han would have thought that she had gone mad. She had grown frantic, her eyes darting, and had begun haphazardly emptying storage units. After the questionably important objects (a.k.a. junk) toppled to the ground, she took a large garbage bin, leaned down (holding on to a couch for support) and flung everything in. Han watched her nervously as she massacred the interior of his ship, but held back from making comments as he feared for his safety lest he incite her ire. Toward the beginning of her rampage he had tried to stop her, claiming that it was bad to do such things so late into her pregnancy, and she had simply responded, "Either I clean out your filthy ship, as I know you won't do it yourself, or you get a new one. It's your choice." After that he had held his tongue.
She was not just cleaning the lounge area – she was cleaning the entire ship. Every centimeter of the ship, from cockpit to cabins, was cleaned out and meticulously shined. As she cleaned she would sigh and make various comments about Han's complete lack of cleaning skills. After cleaning avidly for about an hour, she became particularly upset.
"Han," she called, in a tone that all husbands universe-wide know and fear. "What is this?"
Han rushed over, fearing the worst. Leia was pointing to the stove in the tiny kitchen, where there was a large accumulation of unidentifiable scum that had likely been there for years.
He shrugged. "You've never complained about it before."
"Is it really so hard to clean up a little mess? It would have been so much easier if you had cleaned it up in the first place."
"Smugglers don't usually clean up their messes, Sweetheart. And that," he said, pointing at the substance, "has got to be at least ten years old."
"I think that is the most disgusting thing I have ever heard," Leia complained, wrinkling her nose. "Which means that I'm not cleaning it up."
She handed him cleaning supplies, which he accepted in confusion.
"What am I supposed to do with this stuff?"
"Clean," she stated simply.
"But I'm not the one who cares about the mess! I'm perfectly fine with leaving it the way it is."
"Consider it practice for all the diapers you'll be changing," she provided.
"What does ten-year-old crusted scum have to do with changing diapers?" he asked.
"The fact that I'm not cleaning either of them."
"Well, I see that now we're only going to have one child," he mumbled.
"What was that?" she asked.
"I just said that I'm just so happy to oblige you, dearest," he intoned.
"That's what I thought you said," she sung, before exclaiming and doubling over in pain.
"What was that?" Han asked, irritation transposing to deep concern for his wife.
"It's all right. I think I had my first contraction, but it wasn't bad."
"Your first contraction! I'll go com medical," he said with an authority that was meant to comfort Leia, but that he did not feel at the moment.
"It's okay. Sometimes contractions can be an hour apart in the beginning. We can wait until the next one to call the doctor."
"I'm not gonna wait around while you're in labor," he claimed, rushing toward the cockpit to use the comlink – in his panic forgetting that he had one attached to his tool belt.
"Come here," Leia said, holding out her hand to her flustered husband. "We can walk to Medical."
"No, you need to go in a speeder. We can't be too careful. Medical will send one over here. It'll be okay, don't worry," he stuttered.
"I'm not the one who's worried," she assured, still holding out her hand to him. "Now, dear, please go grab our bags and walk with me to our speeder. If we have to take a speeder it might as well be our own."
"Are you sure you can walk?"
"I'm positive."
So they made their journey to the speeder and flew to Medical (with Han likely flying the fastest that anyone ever had from the docking bay to the hospital). Leia was provided with a room without having to resort to threats; everything seemed to be as different from her dream as possible.
