Notes: Sorry that last chapter wasn't as good. And that I've been taking so long. I graduate from high school this Friday, so everything's been going everywhere.This is like thecrappy in between story. The next one will be better, I swear.So anyway, onward!

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Harry burst into the kitchen. He let the Order use the house as a HQ still, as long as they let him in. He figured that he was close enough to being an auror, and they were in his kitchen...

Tonks looked shocked as he entered. "Harry?" Also in the room were Moody and a few younger people. Lupin was locked up somewhere as it was that time of the month.

"Tell me: why would a dementor leave Azkaban?"

"Because someone told it to. But the only person they've ever listened to was Voldemort." Tonks said.

"Exactly. Then why was there one outside this house the other night?"

"I wouldn't know."

"Well, someone had better go check Azkaban."

Moody stood up, looking annoyed. "Well, someone had better stop bossing his superiors around; especially since this someone isn't a real auror yet."

Harry wasn't afraid at all. "This is my house. If you want to keep meeting here you'd better listen to me once in a while." Moody sat back down. "The last time I subtly tried to suggest something I was ignored. So now I'm not going to be so subtle, especially when it means the safety of myself and Ginny."

"Okay, Harry, we'll send someone out there tonight," Tonks said, obviously to shut him up.

"Good," Harry said. He sat down at the other end of the table. "Go on with whatever you were doing."

The others looked around uncomfortably. "We were discussing Bellatrix Lestrange," the one said.

"Yes. She was in the paper again."

"Killed three muggles for no apparent reason."

"The ministry's all got their undies in a bundle."

"There's always something wrong with the ministry," Harry mumbled. "They're a bunch of incompetent children."

"For once I agree with the boy," Moody said. Harry glanced at him sideways. He was about to say something about the words 'the boy', but stopped himself. "The ministry has never had control over anything, except the people's minds. And sometimes not even that."

"So, what now?" one of the young aurors asked.

"There's really nothing we can do, except try to figure out where she'll be next," Tonks said. "And try to get there before she does."

They continued the conversation for a long time. It became obvious that they had no idea where Bellatrix was. Harry stood up. "If you find her, let me know. I have some unfinished business with her."

"Harry..." Tonks started, but he had already left.

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Harry went upstairs. It was quiet there. No one would bother him. Quiet... and cold. Very cold. Winter was coming early. He didn't care if he was cold. He was alone, and it was quiet.

Sometimes he hated the Order, even Tonks. They seemed like they never knew anything. Like they weren't even useful until something bad came up, then they rushed in to save the day. Kind of a boring existence. He decided that, if he ever did make it through school, that he was never going to join the Order.

He grabbed a key and crossed the hall. Once in the room he sunk down into a chair. He heard the Order leaving below him. Good, he thought. How long could they talk about something they know nothing about?

I need to find something to do, he told himself. Something that I haven't done before. He found that when he just went to school, it felt a lot like Hogwarts, which made everything come flooding back and made him more depressed than usual... I need to find something to do, he thought again. Something that will get my mind off of... everything...

A door closed beneath him. Ginny... he got up to go meet her. She had fallen onto a couch in the living room, looking very tired. He leaned on the back of the couch and looked down at her. "Hi." She moaned and rolled over. "Nice to see you too."

She laughed. "I'm so tired of doing school work. I feel like I should be done already."

"I was thinking..." he started.

"Yes?"

"That I need to find something to do."

"Ummhmm."

"But I don't know what."

"Hmm... you should join quidditch."

"No."

"Try outs are this weekend."

"We already had this conversation."

"I still think you should."

"And I'm still not going to," Harry said, getting annoyed. The last thing he wanted to do was play quidditch. If all he did was school and quidditch... that was the same thing he had done at Hogwarts... and that didn't help his situation at all. "I was thinking that I should get a job."

"Where at?"

"I dunno. But it will give me something to do. Maybe I won't be as lazy."

"I doubt that," Ginny joked.

"And, I know I have enough money, but it won't last forever. So I can make some extra money, you know, if we need something later, and -"

"Aww!" She reached up and hugged him.

"What?"

"You said 'we'."

"For crying out loud..." She hugged him again. "Fine then. Me."

"No, it's too late. You already said it."

"Do you know if Fred and George need anyone?" he asked, trying to change the subject.

"I don't have a clue. You'd have to ask them." She kissed him. "You're so sweet sometimes."

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"Sorry, Harry," George said. "We don't need any new people at the moment."

"But we're opening another store soon," Fred said.

"Yeah. And we'll need managers there."

"So we'll keep you in mind." They were in the store in Diagon Alley as it was being bombarded by a pack of small children. "I heard there are stores that need people in Hogsmeade."

"Yeah, since the school wasn't open last year they lost a lot of business and many workers quit."

"Maybe someone down there will hire you. Sorry, wish we could help more." Harry left quickly, getting annoyed at the troops of kids. Hogsmeade... I'm better off playing quidditch, he thought. So many things had happened in Hogsmeade as well...

Stop it already, he told himself. You're being a child. So what if something reminds you of Hogwarts? It's all in the past. You can't fix it now. Let it go. Some part of his brain remembered the time turners... no, the other part said. They were all broken. And it takes a while to make a new one. Plus you'd probably end up messing things up more. So just forget it. Let it go.

But he couldn't let it go. Don't think about it. The past always follows you, he thought. You can't get rid of it. Deal with it. You need to get on with your life. You can't spend all of your time being lazy and depressed. It's hurting you. It's hurting Ginny. Something there touched him. He didn't care if he were hurting himself, but if he was hurting Ginny... Go to Hogsmeade, he told himself. Get a job. Get out of this rut while you still can.

But he couldn't get himself to go. He went back to Grimmauld Place. No matter how long he spent trying to convince himself, he couldn't do it. You have to. You have to do it...

He sat in Grimmauld Place for at least an hour. He told himself he had to go for it. No matter what happened, he had to.But still, he couldn't. It's funny, he thought. Before I couldn't wait to get to Hogwarts, and now I'd rather hang myself with barbed wire.

It wasn't that Dumbledore wasn't there anymore. He was over that now. But so many other things had happened there. Things that if he had done it differently he might have a different life now. Things that were his fault... And everytime he thought about the school, or anything nearby, everything bad that had happened ran back into his mind. Everything that he had worked so hard to forget came back like water behind a broken dam. It had made Hogwarts an ugly thing, something he didn't want to see anymore.

He lied down. He wasn't going anywhere now. He had depressed himself too much. Everything was trapped in his head. He needed to get it out, but he couldn't. He didn't know how.