Disclaimer: I don't own the TMNT
A/N: Hello guys. Sorry for the long wait, I haven't been doing to well health-wise recently.Being well into the secondtrimester of pregnancy hasn't helped much either.I haven't even been to work in over a month as per doctors orders. Thank heavens for the military, because I'm still getting a steady paycheck, and I'm sure that those medical tests and other expenses aren't cheap. I found out that the MRI that they made me go through costs about $1,070 alone. Yeah, jeepers. I'm so happy that I can reach the computer now. I've been having many issues with my concentration and focus so please forgive me if the writing style or chapter isn't exactly how you'd like it. I'm walking better and sitting up on my own easier so I should be able to reach the computer more often. Please have patience with me, there's no way in hell I'm dropping out of fanfiction so you don't have to worry about that. I just ask that you keep an eye on the stories that you're reading. I might not update as regularly as I once did, but I can assure you that I won't forget. God bless.
Chapter 30
After
I sighed and looked at the face on the computer screen as I finished telling about that fateful day, the day that Vivid died. Tears were streaming down the human's cheeks and she was biting her lip to keep her cries from becoming vocal. I could feel my own tears warming the backs of my eyes as well.
Me? Cry again? I've already spilled so many tears. Besides, that was months ago that it happened. Master Splinter told me that the pain would fade with time. That I would start to move on, to live like myself again.
I'm still waiting for that damn fading to kick it's ass in gear now. And what if I don't want to fu#king move on! What then! I squeezed my jaws together until my teeth hurt. Friggin hell.
A sniff from the computer screen brought my attention back to the human. The human that I've been telling this story to, the whole story. The stuff that I didn't want to tell my brothers, or even my father. The stuff I didn't want to even admit to. I sighed. Sensei told me that it wouldn't hurt so much if I let it out, if I didn't keep it bottled up in characteristic 'Raph style.'I'm pretty darn sure he meant either him or my brothers. Bet he didn't gamble on me going to a complete stranger now did he? It was funny the way I found her, too. I was understandably cautious at first, but then I found out where she came from, a generation of secret-keepers. That's what they did. Her mother did it, her mother, so on and so forth. There were secrets of both world wars, the crap at Roswell, horrible deeds, anything that someone wanted to tell but didn't want repeated. A secret. The thought intrigued me and eventually my pain forced me to succumb. I don't regret it.
The human on the screen drew a shuddering breath and looked at me with tear soaked eyes. "What did you do then?" she whispered hoarsly.
I gave the computer screen a crooked smile. "Well I guess that I went on livin."
Just then an infant's squall pierced the air and I cursed under my breath. The human nodded at me and I gave her another half smile before bidding farewell and shutting off the machine. Rubbing my eyes with clenched fists I heaved myself off the chair and glanced at the clock. Nearly four. In a few hours I'll have to train and I didn't get a lick of sleep.
Taking a moment to bounce on my toes and stretch my hamstrings from sitting down for so long I smiled again. My brothers said that I changed. For better or for worse, who knows and who the hell cares. I sure don't.
My feet still draggingsomewhat I moved across the room the the two cribs tucked in a cozy corner. Thecribs were odd looking, but nice and sturdy. The guys have no problem picking up soiled blankets and mattresses probably screwed onby a millionpeople but for some reason they had a problem doing the same for these two. April bought some small foam mattresses and some fresh, clean, soft baby blankets. Don insistedthat all store bought cribs were unsuitable for habitation by guinea pigs and proceeded to make some himself. They were thevery latest in infant safety. Not a single molecule of those things could cut, get swallowed, strangle,brake, or anything else you could possibly think of.He made them out of some type of metal (to prevent splinters, he said) that didn't get cold all that easily. I suspect he concocted the substance himself in his lab. They were odd looking and spacey to be sure but they haven't had a single problem so far.
My kids.
I chuckled as I remembered the long argument on names. At the time, I wasn't in too good of a mood. I didn't say a single word except to stoutly growl no to a name I didn't like at all. Other than that, I let my family have at it. Ridiculous names were brought up from each of them. They all had their own ideas. Splinter wanted Japanese names and Mikey wanted to name them after comic book characters. I eventually got tired of saying no to him. I just retrieved one of his beloved comic books and threatened to rip the thing each time he said something stupid. I'm surprised that it survived. Leonardo wanted to continue the wholenaming after dead painters thing but I didn't like that too much either. Neither did Donatello, who wanted the names to come from historical figures and inventors and the like. He pointed out to Leo that Leonardo da Vinci was an inventor, Michelangelo a man of infinite patience, and Raphael painted women and babies then asked how closely they matched our personalities. It was kinda funny watching them argue.
The only problem that I had with Splinter's name suggestions is that I didn't even think I could pronounce half of them. Yeah, I know, shameful. I understand the language better than I speak it, especially when I'm angry. Yeah, you know how often that is right? I just didn't want to get mad at one of the squirts, shout out their name and have it sound like a farting snake.
By this time Mikey was actually too terrified to utter a single suggestion and Leo was exasperated enough to give up on the dead painter thing. Seeing my frustration, Splinter suggested a realatively simple Japanese name, Kento, meaning stout and healthy. Eventually it was agreed upon that that would be my son's name.
About then Don started to prattle so many names that I was about to punch him before Mikey of all people stopped him on one. Isis. Apparently it was an Egyptian goddess of beauty and all that good stuff. I liked that one too.
I know it sounds heartless that I didn't really participating, but half of all my brain was always centered on Vivid. She died because of me, to kill Honor. For me.
I shook my head fiercly, feeling the tears starting up again. I swear, if I cry any more, people will think I'm a girl.
Once again, Isis was the one who was screaming her head off. Kento was snuffling, sucking in his lip, getting upset by all her racket. With long practiced ease I picked up my daughter and bounced her against my chest, cooing to her below my breath. As usual this was not enough to ease her and she slammed her chubby little fists into my shoulder in what I could only describe as pure rage. It is always difficult to get her to shut up, so far she has been a true test to my patience. I fished through the small fridge that I was allowed to keep in my room for the kid's food and such. I picked up a container of what I think is fruit or something and set her down to unscrew the lid.
Their eating was different as well. At first we tried to give them formula, but it wouldn't satisfy. Eventually we tried baby food and found that these worked perfectly. Don, excited about it as usual, looked into it and came up with a hypothesis that I could somewhat understand. Becuase it was far fetched for guys to grow boobs, it couldn't be expected for infants to be fed off of milk since it wasn't exactly avaliable. He tested their stomach enzymes and stuff and found out that they could easily digest regular food, even though it had to be mushy. Yeah, no teeth.
For a brief moment Isis stopped her yowling and I swear that she scowled at me. I glared right back at her. Even though she was only six months old, she and her brother were already the size of a human infant that was at least one full year old. Thier dexterety was better, though not exactly by leaps and bounds, and they could do more than we expected of an infant thier age.For example, they could already sit upby themselves for short periods of time.Don wasn't sure whether to attribute this to their birth (from males) or that they were part turtle, since turtles in the wild have a remarkably short 'childhood' if you could even call it that. They were born being able to do pretty much anything that their parents could. Sensei, based off of his experience with us, said that he thought it was the latter rather than the former, even though my kids were still developing a bit differently than we did.
Isis at the moment was trying my last nerve. She stuck her tongue out at me, scrunching up her tiny little face in an expression that clearly spelled 'I'm not happy.' Then, with a big intake of breath, she started her screaming once more.
With frustration built into my muscles I worked more furoiusly to get this friggin bottle lid off. who the hell invented lids that won't screw off anyway! I'm going to kill Donny!
My hand tightened around the lid and I twisted with all my might. My hand stuck, and for a second there I thought that the lid would move, until suddenly my hand slipped out of place.
With a roar of fury I hurled the accursed jar across the room with all my might. It whistled through the air before coming into contact with the wall. Against all friggin odds, the fu#king thing bounced off and rebounded straight back at me. Too late I realized what washappening before it nailed me hard right between the eyes.
The sheer suddenness and sharpness of the blow managed to knock me back. I fell to the floor heavily, gripping my face with both hands and cursing loudly to everything on the earth and stars. I rolled on the ground and kicked at the floor in a mixture of pain and anger. I was about to continue the tirade until a gentle sound disturbed it.
giggle
I slowly rolled over and uncovered one smarting eye from my fingers. The little brat was sitting ther with her fingers in her mouth anda wide smile plastered on her face. Looking at me with dancing eyes she giggled again, going so long with the garbled sound that I'm surprised that she had time to inhale.
Without completely realizing it the anger seeped out of me and I couldn't help but grin. "So, you think that's funny do you, you little brat?" Wincing, I took my hands away from my face and plucked her off her perch and sat her across my chest.
She yanked her hands out of her mouth, splattering drool across my face, and slapped at my chest with open palms, her smiling face still giggling. My grin grew a small bit wider and I bounced her up and down a little bit. She laughed and tried to clap her hands in joy. Didn't quite make it. "It's alright, Sissy, you'll be able to clap your hands eventually." I mumbled.
Slowly heaving myself off of the ground I walked over to the cribs and settled her down into the crib next to her brother. She giggled at me again. Smiling, I tapped her on the nose. Kento, taking advantage of the quiet, had settled back into sleep and was now peacefully sucking his thumb. Once again I wondered how two children, twins in fact could be as different as night and day. Sissy the spitfire and Kenny the placid one. I shook my head.
Turning away from the kids I spied my sai lying next to my bed. I picked it up and studied it once more. I didn't study it because it was different in any way, it was because of where it's twin was. My second sai. The last time I say it it was dripping with Honor's blood and being held in Vivid's precious hands. She probably died with it in her hands. Although it's been offered, I never took up the chance to get another one, or even a different pair. There was nothing wrong with this one, and something told me that it's twin was just fine as well. I would find it eventually.
Yes. Eventually.
A/N: Sorry this took so long, it only took two trips in the same day (had to take a break for rest). Well, the words are starting to get a little fuzzy so I figured that I should end it right about now. THIS IS NOT THE LAST CHAPTER! Just so you know. I was actually going to end it on this one but it turned out longer than I planned, I guess I put in too much fluff. Yeah. It sucks. I blame it on the medical anomalie that the doctors are raving about. Whatever. Next chapter for sure will be the end. I am toying with the idea of doing a sequel, have come up with several ideas in that respect. Tell me what you guys think if you want to.
Review if you so wish, I know a lot of you are probably mad at me right now. Please forgive me!
Toodles.
