My fellow readers ...we have finally reached the conclusion of Azula's healing arc.

Okay , that's a bit of an over-exaggeration. Azula's healing is sort of a whole fic course kinda thing , its not gonna be wrapped up in this arc alone and she's still going to encounter some difficulties in her life later on. But this arc marks a big stage of development in Azula's life that I think you are all going to like.

:)

Big thanks to HammerTide for beta reading this chapter and providing good feedback.

With that said , let's get this chapter started !


Almost evening already...

Kazumi thought as she looked out the window and saw that the sun was starting go down already , night will not follow far behind . The older woman let out a breath as she got ready for the trip she herself suggested for her and Azula. But now it feels as though the day could not be ending slower , just so Kazumi could put off this feeling of anxiety in her stomach over what was to come of this trip.

Their day had been relatively peaceful all things considered , Azula told her she had no nightmares the night before and Kazumi could tell that she was telling the truth. For that she was thankful for the spirits for giving Azula a night of proper rest. The rest of the day followed as their usual routine , breakfast , training , some lunch and an early dinner to compensate for the trip they were going to make tonight.

It would seem that the young girl she had taken into her care months ago had finally started to properly recover and heal from all the pain she had endured , for that she was truly thankful to the spirits for Azula's recover ... yet why did the thought fill her with sadness for some reason ?

Was it because some part of her mind already knew that Azula would most likely leave as soon as she recovered ... or did she feel sad because it felt as though she was going to lose another dau-

Kazumi firmly smacked herself on the cheek. Not one of those light slaps either . But a truly hard one that left her cheek stinging from the pain. She didn't even flinch . She deserved it for even daring to think such a thing.

Azula wasn't a pet . Or a doll. Or some replacement sent from the heavens themselves to fill the void left behind by Kazumi's own lost daughter from so long ago. She was her own person . And whether she chose to stay or leave was her choice.

She told herself that in her mind ... yet her heart still felt sadness.

Kazumi let out a humorless chuckle ... she truly was a disgusting human being. Her beauty be damned , she was a truly horrid person for even thinking such a thing.

She still can't even muster up the courage to tell Azula the truth. Even though she knows deep down that Azula would be likely to accept her if she told it straight to her . Because she knows that if Azula knew the truth , she would never be able to look her in the eye again. And Azula would flee and never look back . She would never see the girl again to the end of her days . And that filled her heart with the same grief she hadn't felt since the day her daughter had died.

She knows Azula isn't hers to keep ...and she hates herself for even considering it..

" Kazumi ? You in there ?" A voice interrupts her self loathing thoughts and Kazumi quickly recognized it to be Azula's.

" Come in , Azula " Kazumi called out and a second later , Azula poked her head in the room " Yes Azula ? Do you need something ?"

" I was just wondering when we were going on that trip you mentioned " Azula reminded her with a quizzical look " Its getting dark , so if we're going to head out we should do it soon ..."

" Oh yes , we'll be going out soon enough . Just wait another hour or two and we'll be set " Kazumi gave her a comforting smile and Azula still gave her a curious look but didn't pursue further.

" Okay ... I was just making sure you were alright ..." Azula said briefly before leaving and Kazumi's heart lifted in sadness.

The girl truly was changing and growing into a fine young lady...

I wonder if I'll be there to see it though ...

Kazumi pushed those thoughts away as she got herself ready for the trip.

She was one to keep her promises after all.


Azula followed Kazumi carefully as they trudge through and past the mess of bushes and brush. Azula once again feeling tempted to just burn everything in her path away , but the older woman calmly instructed her not to. She said that doing such a vicious act against the forest would anger the spirits that lay here and most important of all, it would anger the Mother of Faces.

Azula hazily recollects her meeting with the spirit and rationally decides to follow Kazumi's advice. She was crazy , not stupid.

So she followed the older woman's advice and words , as they moved past the shrubbery. The former princess genuinely confused by how ...pleasant the forest was being to them. They hadn't been attacked or harassed by any of the wildlife , plants or animals . She wondered if it had something to do with Kazumi being a spirit navigator but she kept that question to herself.

Azula observed the forest around her with a careful eye as she continued to follow Kazumi , who held up a hand with a white flame to make sure they were going the right way. The young girl still couldn't help but feel amazed once again when she saw Kazumi's flame , but didn't make a comment on it.

Even if she was still mesmerized every time she saw it.

" Kazumi ...how much further ?" Azula slowly asked .

"Not long now Azula ..." Kazumi turned her head just enough for Azula to see her smirk " I promise that it's going to be worth the trip "

Azula decided to take the older woman at her word for it. It wasn't as if a little trek like this was of any strain on her , she had endured much longer trips on foot during the war. And since she had started training again with Kazumi , she has managed to get herself back up to full strength.

The former princess was at least thankful that Kazumi had prepared some more proper clothes for this trip. She was dressed in more fitting robes, pants and her boots from when she first arrived that had since been cleaned by Kazumi.

I suppose I'll have to thank her for that too..

Azula thought as she followed Kazumi.

The former princess flinched as she almost got cut by a particular sharp branch and doing her best to ignore the strange eerie feeling that the forest had. It almost ...felt like one of her nightmares.

You don't deserve this.

A voice came from her inner thoughts ...only this one didn't sound like any she had ever heard before.

What ?

You don't deserve this. You don't deserve to be cared for by this beautiful talented woman. Who has been more than patient than any rational person should ever be with someone like you...

Shut up ...you're not real...

I'm as real as your mind thinks I am ... and I think you know how truthful my words actually are.

Azula was silent , trying her best to ignore the voice but it kept coming back.

Silent treatment ? I expected better honestly. You truly have fallen from grace Azula ...once a proud arrogant princess and now nothing more than a hollow shell of your former self. You've become a BURDEN Azula...something someone else has to take care of , either because its their job or because they pity you enough ...

Shut. Up.

You can never silence me Azula ...I am the evil that keeps you up night , the shadow in the dark corner of your mind...

SHUT UP

" Azula ? Are you okay ?"

The young girl was snapped out of her internal shouting match with the voice in her head , as she saw Kazumi looking at her with a worried expression. Azula realizing that she had been uncharacteristically silent the whole time.

" I'm fine Kazumi , what is it ? " Azula lies to the best of her ability and its looks like Kazumi bought it.

" We've arrived Azula ..." Kazumi said with a smile as she pushed past the bush and Azula followed after her.

She took in the scene in front of her with a breath.

It was a wide and spacious clearing in the middle of the forest , with the treeline all around them. But in the center of the clearing was a large circular pool...

Wait a second ...this is the same pool the Mother of Faces popped out of !

Even after a few months , the former princess could still remember her encounter with the spirit that had emerged from the pool.

But ...there was something strangely different about the pool itself . It was the way of how the clear water was beautifully reflecting the light of the moon that was shining down on it.

As if the pool itself was being illuminated by the light of the moon.

" This is ..." Azula was struggling to properly describe how beautiful the pool looked right now.

" And it gets even better ..." Kazumi said with a smirk as she held up the white flame in her hand and sent it into the pool.

Azula was briefly concerned as she recalled the last time she shot the pool with lightning , it warranted a very ...unpleasant response from the spirit.

But her eyes widened as something extraordinary happened...

The pool started to swirl and changed color ...it was changing into all different sorts to the point it almost looked like a kind of water rainbow. But it had a kind of reflection to it that amplified its beauty.

" Whoa..." Azula said as she got closer.

" I had the exact same reaction when my mother took me here ..." Kazumi said with a smile " Traditionally ... we spirit navigators aren't supposed to show anyone this , but I think this is a special occasion "

Azula didn't say anything as she got closer to the pool and looks at its swirling reflection.

She sees the swirling colors of the pool reflect back at her ...and her own reflection.

It wasn't of mother ...but it wasn't quite her either.

It was ...how she used to be. Before the comet.

Hair tied , armor polished and looking right back at her with smug arrogance in her eyes.

Miss me ?

The reflection seems to say and Azula instinctively takes a step back.

" No ... you can't be real...you-"

" Azula what's wrong ? " Kazumi suddenly asks , looking at her with worry in her eyes " Are you ...having another hallucination ? "

Azula took a breath and looked back at the pool ...her younger self disappeared.

"N-No ...its gone now ..." Azula said shakily. She hadn't expected to see her past self.

" Do you need to sit down ? Or do you want to go back to the house ?" Kazumi suggested and Azula wasn't sure about either of those suggestions. She didn't feel up to walk all the way back when they just got here.

" No ...I'm just cold ..." Azula said as she walked away " I'm gonna start a fire "

Kazumi looked at the girl sadly as she walked off to go find some dry branches to burn.

Maybe this trip wasn't the best idea after all...

Kazumi thought as she watched the young girl move with a slight hesitance in her movements.

It didn't take long for the fire to be lit. Azula quickly gathering some dry branches and kindling and burning the wood. She was honestly just looking for an excuse to burn something to feel a bit better.

Azula sat close to the blue fire , hugging her knees close to her chest.

She hadn't expected to see her past self in her reflection in the pool ...there was something uncanny about it. It disturbed her almost as much seeing her sorry excuse for a mother as a hallucination.

She just ...wanted to forget it all. Was that so wrong ?

She sat by the fire , in silence as Kazumi watched in the distance. The older woman looked at her sadly as she sat by the fire as well.

" ...Do you want to talk about it ? " Kazumi quietly asked.

" ...No " Azula said after a minute of silence.

" Was it your mother again ? "

"No , it wasn't my damn ghost mother ..." Azula said a bit louder than she should have " I-I-It was me ... I saw ... a younger me ..."

" A younger version of yourself ?" Kazumi raised an eyebrow.

" How I used to be ..." Azula said softly.

Back when I was more than a deranged mad girl who had very badly repressed mommy issues , when I actually had pride , power , dignity ...and was not a total emotional clusterfuck.

Kazumi was quiet for a moment , just observing the girl when she spoke again " ... Are you sure you don't want to talk about it ? "

" I said I don't want to , okay ?" Azula snapped.

" Keeping your emotions bottled up won't do you any good Azula ..." Kazumi said , she knew she was pushing her boundaries right now. But if Azula just repress this , then she may never get over it " You can't just shrug this kind of stuff off like its nothing ...the only way you can rid of these ugly emotions is to talk about them ..."

Azula was angry. She didn't need this right now.

" You don't know anything Kazumi ...you don't know me ..." Azula said with anger in her voice " You can't even begin to understand how mad I am ..."

" Mad at who Azula ... ? " Kazumi asked calmly and Azula was dumbfounded.

Azula stood up and turned away , some part of her mind knew how much of a child she was acting right now but she didn't care . She didn't want to put up with Kazumi's inquisitive questions while they were in the middle of a forest on a trip that was supposed to be good for them.

" Are you mad at your mother ?" Kazumi asked.

" ...No ..."

Not right now at least ...

" Your father ...? "

" No ..."

He isn't even worth the hate anymore...

" Are you mad brother ...? "

" NO !" Azula shouted , getting irritated at Kazumi's questions.

" Then who is it Azula ?"Kazumi asked " Who are you most mad at right now? Your brother , mother or even your father ?...Or are you mad at me-"

The flames flared up briefly and Kazumi had to take a step back from heat.

"I'M MAD AT MYSELF !"

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

For a time, there was nothing but complete silence between the two of them . The fire having gone out from Azula's outburst and Kazumi just sat there in shock at the girl's admittance.

She's ...mad at herself ?

Kazumi could only watch as the young girl turned... and she saw tears in her eyes.

" Does Zuzu and mother honestly think that I haven't thought of it ?! That I haven't figured it all out ?! "Azula shouted in anger " Like I didn't have ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD TO FIGURE OUT EXACTLY WHAT WENT WRONG IN MY LIFE IN THAT ASYLUM ?! " Azula said as tears started to spill " All I had in that asylum was time to think of where I went wrong in my life ! What I did to deserve being thrown and left to rot in that hellhole ! "

" And you know what I figured out Kazumi ? That I deserved it all along ! " Azula shouted , starting to ramble at this " I know that I'm bitchy , I'm cold , I'm arrogant , I'm ruthless , I'm cruel , I know that anybody remotely normal or has a brain would realize after two seconds how much of a social and emotional fuckup I really am... I mistreated those few around me that actually gave a damn about me like they were nothing and when they walked away from me ..."

" It hurt ...knowing that they chose to leave but also because I drove them to it ..."

Tears fell as she thought of Mai and Ty Lee ...the two girls in the world she actually would consider friends . But is that what they really were ? Or were they just playing along because their parents told them to appease her ?

" And my family ...they all chose to leave me...b-because ...I'm a monster ..." Azula said with her voice cracking " I can't blame my father for how I turned ...I turned out this way because I chose to be ...I'm a monster Kazumi ..."

Kazumi could not sit idly by any longer as she got up and pulled the girl into an embrace.

Neither of them said anything as Azula simply sobbed into Kazumi's shoulder. The older woman gently stroking the girl's hair as she cried.

" You're not a monster Azula ..."

" H-How can I believe that Kazumi ...when I've hurt so many people ..."

" ...You have done some very bad things Azula ...and maybe you do deserve to be punished for them ... but that doesn't make you a monster " Kazumi whispered " And I think you've suffered enough ..."

Azula didn't respond but instead sobbed until she couldn't anymore at which point Kazumi's shoulder was wet but the older woman didn't care.

All she cared about at this moment was this girl that was right in front of her.

They kept like this for a few moments ...before Azula pulled away and wiped her residual tears away.

" Feeling better now ? " Kazumi asked.

" A little ...this isn't nearly as bad as the others ..." Azula said , but she still looked upset " Thank you ...Kazumi ..."

The older woman smiled ...but at the same time she felt sad herself.

She truly has grown stronger ...way past her need for me.

Kazumi thought it was terrible that she felt sad that Azula was finally recovering and would have slapped herself if she wasn't in front of Azula right now.

" Why do you look sad Kazumi ? " This time it was Azula who asked the older woman. Noticing the sad look on her face.

" Its nothing its-"

" Weren't you the one who said to me literally 20 seconds ago how talking about your feelings is important ? "Azula countered and Kazumi couldn't help but smile a little.

" You got me there ..." Kazumi nodded " Let's sit first though ..."

The two of them sat by the pool , that shiny beautiful swirl of colors having long dissipated but the light of the moon was still shining into the pool making it sparkle and glitter.

" So ...what's bothering you Kazumi ?"

Kazumi took a deep breath , there was no getting out of it now.

" I just ...wanted to say first Azula that when we first met you were ... troubled . You were paranoid , you could barely get a night's rest without having a nightmare or episode , you were distrustful of me ..." Kazumi explained " But now ...you've grown , you're no longer paranoid , you can sleep well ...even now you can recover easily after hallucinating ..."

Azula eyes widened as she heard Kazumi talk " What are you saying ...? "

" I'm saying ...that perhaps you've outgrown your need for me ...and that's a good thing " Kazumi admitted sadly " You said to me when you first arrived that you wanted to leave as soon as you could ...well the rainy season has long ended , I can take you to Hira'a now if you want ..."

Azula was shocked . She had honestly forgotten all about that ...but is that what she really wanted ?

She was no longer totally insane. She could sleep well enough on her own. She was no longer the whimpering hollow shell of her former self anymore , she could leave right now if she wanted ...

Yet why did it hurt so much ?

" If ... I wanted to leave ...what would you do ? " Azula quietly asked.

" I would take you to the village of Hira'a , give you some money and you can go your own way ... I would return to my house and live the rest of my life as usual ..." Kazumi said calmly , she didn't want to guilt trip Azula into staying with her.

Azula thought about it ...where would she even go ?

What does she even have waiting for her out there ? She has no family , friends , or allies that could give a legitimate damn about her.

But here with Kazumi ...she might just be the only person that might still care about her...

" If you want to leave then-"

" I'll stay with you Kazumi..."

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

Kazumi looked at the younger girl in shock at what she just said , needing a second to fully realize them.

" You've ...taken care of me Kazumi , you've been more patient than any ordinary person would be with someone like me ...you've done for me than my own family has ..." Azula said softly " And its not like I have anywhere I can actually go so ... would it be okay if I stayed with you ? "

Kazumi was shocked and mouth agape , she hadn't even realized a sole tear had escaped her eye.

" Azula ...you're more than welcomed to stay with me..."

Kazumi smiled ...she wasn't leaving her after all.

She couldn't help herself as she suddenly embraced Azula , holding her close , this time tears coming out of her eyes.

" Thank you ...Azula ..." Kazumi whispered.

" No ...thank you Kazumi ..." Azula smiled as she embraced the older woman back.

For the first time in Azula's life ...she felt as though things really were going to be okay.


Healing Arc : Finished


God you all have no idea how long I've wanted to finish this arc and I must say that I'm particularly proud of it. Azula deciding to stay with Kazumi has always been something I've had on my mind and I hope her decision making here makes sense.

Now I just really wanted to say something about this chapter ...yes , Azula has been 100% fully aware of how horrible of a person she really was. Like with her mental problems , she's soberly aware of all of them. And yes , she will have to confront them at some point or another in the course of this story.

I think a crucial part of Azula redeeming herself is accepting how horrible of a person she truly used to be and learning to become a better person. ( Even as an Azula fan) I can say that Azula absolutely NEEDS to accept that part of herself and make amends with those she has hurt . And like this chapter has shown , she is aware of that side but hasn't quite figured out how to deal with it.

I am very happy that I picked up this story from HammerTide , while I will admit that not all of it turned out the way I expected but I think I like how the story is going so far.

Hope you all will continue to follow me on this Azula redemption journey.

With that said , I'll see you all in the next one.

Angel Out.