A/N: Sorry for the confusion about the 'fantom' chapter. I revised it after I took it down and this is the result. OH, and I'm sorry if any of you are offended by how I end the sparring match.

Dedicated to: sissybear, Virago500 (for being such a pain in the mik'ta), trinitystargazer3, and Ilovesg1.


Sam got ready for the fight by removing her sweater, revealing a low cut tank-top that Jack thought looked awfully familiar. It took him looking back into her eyes and noticing the primal anger in them that it finally clicked.

"I don't think you're allowed to wear a shirt like that, Carter," he said, trying to contain how nervous he was.

Sam pouted a little, "Why not, sir? I saw nothing in the manuals about not being able to wear a tank top while fighting." A mischievous smirk appeared on her face, "Would you rather I took it off, sir?"

The men of SG-5 watched their CO expectantly as he tried to come up with an answer that would be appropriate and at the same time get Colonel Carter into a more appropriate shirt. No one was surprised when he just didn't answer altogether.

Sue grinned at her sister, "Sam, I thought I was the only one of us who fought dirty?"

Sam looked at her sister innocently, "This is fighting dirty? I thought it was … utilizing my assets. Isn't that what Mom called it?"

Sandra laughed at her sisters before turning back to her husband, "Now, aren't you glad I don't fight like that? You got the sane Carter."

"I'm just wondering how he got a 'Carter' at all!" one of Ethan's men said jokingly. The other two, who had met Sandra at a few team nights before she 'disappeared' and left the guys alone, glared at the third.

The smile left Sandra's face as she looked at her husband's subordinate, "What's your name, Airman?"

The young man gulped, "Sergeant Larry Kale, ma'am."

Sandra closed her eyes, "Well, Sergeant, I only play two ways: nice and mean. If you want to play nice with me, then I suggest you get that stick out of your ass and learn that there are three women in this room who could kick your ass to Abydos."

Ethan looked at his wife curiously, "Since when do you know about Abydos?"

She smiled slyly at him, "The trip to the Asgard home world is very long – and Daniel Jackson likes to talk a lot."

"T, you gonna run this show?" Jack asked the big man.

"Indeed, O'Neill, it would be my honor to witness Colonel Carter gain the upper hand once again while sparring with you," Teal'c said with a nod.

Jack glared at him, "Thanks for the vote of confidence, buddy."

"You are welcome, O'Neill."

At first, the sparring was really just the exchanging and blocking of blows … that is, until Sam decided that she wanted to have an actually conversation with Jack while trying to beat the crap out of him.

"You're a chauvinistic bastard!" Sam said as she brought up her right leg in a fierce kick.

Jack caught her foot on his chest, but didn't fall down, just twisted her whole leg, causing Sam to fall flat on her back. "That's insubordination, Colonel!" he shot back calmly.

Sam's glare was icy cold and deadly, most of the men at the SGC (and off world) were terrified of her glare – Jack wasn't most men. Quickly surveying where he was standing, and realizing he was just close enough for her plan to work, Sam's foot shot up in a very dangerous kick – that landed in the one place she knew would take him off his feet in two seconds flat.

The six other men in the room winced in sympathy as they saw Sam's foot connect a few inches away from Jack's reproductive organs: hard, very hard. As he fell to his knees, she slowly got up, breathing heavily.

"That was for what you put me through five years ago with Edora and Laira," she said through gritted teeth.

Jack felt like he wanted to pass out from the pain and embarrassment from both the memories and what Sam had just done to his manliness – it wasn't like her foot hit his balls – then he would just be pissed, but hitting his thigh wasn't that much better. There was silence for uncounted minutes as Jack tried to recover enough strength to sit. Slowly, as if unsure he could, he sat up and glared at Sam.

"Jonas."

Sam glared back, knowing exactly what he was doing, "Kynthia."

"Martouf."

"Fine, then – Hathor."

"Joe." The onlookers backed up a few steps as Jack got to his feet and started a nonviolent face-off with the head of the science department.

"The other me."

"Narim"

"Freya and Anise."

Jack's glare was deadly, "Anise was interested in Daniel, Carter. But you want to play that way: Lantesh."

"Shallan."

"Felger."

"He doesn't count," Sam said icily, "I never actually reciprocated the feelings."

"Then neither do Hathor, Anise, Freya and Shallan," Jack shot back.

"One: for a while you thought you did love Hathor. Two: I don't care what you say about Anise and Freya – Tok'ra Barbie still counts. Three: Then why did you go back for her and take her away from Ba'al?"

"Pete," was his reply, completely ignoring her words.

There was only one more name that she could say – and it would create a wedge between them bigger than the one that was already there. Instead of thinking about it, she just said the name, "Kerry."

Jack took two steps closer to her, cocked his head to one side and asked calmly, "How do you know about Kerry?"

"I saw you out with her last Wednesday night," Sam said, her voice low.

Before either of them could act on the numerous ways they were thinking of ended the situation, Sandra forced her husband and his team to leave the gym, with her and Sue in tow. When Sue complained in the corridor, Sandra just looked at her and said, "Sue, you know why they were exchanging names, and you know it's not our business to see how it plays out."

She sighed, "Fine. Hey, I'm hungry. Where can a girl get some food around here?"

Ethan smirked at the single mindedness of his sister-in-law. "Come on, we'll show you where the commissary is – won't we, boys?"

"Yeah."

"Sure."

"You betcha."

Ethan glared at the three of them, "Since when did you guys start copying General O'Neill?"

The three other men looked at each other, contemplating the answer. It was Larry who answered, "Since he told us to keep you in check."


A/N: Before any of you whine about how being kicked there still hurts - it happened to my dad. His girlfriend was trying to show me and my sisters how to ... disable an attacker and her knee missed her target.