Breakups / Seaforth

Nathan Scott stares at the phone cradled in his palm, half-empty glass of whiskey right beside him. He wants nothing more than to call her. He knows he shouldn't. It's nearly 2 in the morning and he's drunk. If he's smart, he'll call a cab and leave the bar. Never look back.

But he doesn't. He stays rooted to the barstool, still staring at the dimly lit screen. She's the only person in the world he wants to talk to right now- two in the morning, or two in the afternoon, it doesn't matter. Haley James is on his mind every second of every day. His finger hovers over the call button. He knows, even if it's this late, she'll still pick up. She always does. He has to hear her voice. Even when he's sober, he misses her. The pain is too much to take. She's his painkiller. The only one who causes and eases the hurt at the same time.

The silent battle in Nathan's mind amplifies. He said he wouldn't call. They both agreed not to talk. Still, it's not enough to deter the desire coursing through his veins like a river rushing through the desert. The only source of hesitation comes with the fear she may not be alone- the panicked thought makes Nathan drain his glass in a single gulp. By now, he's lost count of what number he was on. He can't take the thought of another man in her bed. It kills him, but he needs to talk to her. She's his best friend. Even before they dated. They could be best friends after the breakup, couldn't they?

He presses the call button before he can talk himself out of it. The phone rings two times until he hears her soft voice at the end of the line. It's all he wanted.

"Hello?"

His lips curve into a smile. She answered. He breathes a sigh of relief.

"Hi, Hales."

Nathan's not sure what to say. He's afraid to speak. So he listens. Maybe it's just the alcohol blurring his brain, but he swears he can hear a male voice between their silence. It's a struggle to understand, but there's definitely sound.

"Who is that?" He asks gruffly.

"What?"

"Who are you with?"

"No one," Haley replies.

"Don't lie to me," the words come out in a hasty slur.

"Nathan," she sighs, "you're drunk."

"I'm not." He is and he knows it. "I hear a voice."

She sighs again. The sound of movement rustles into the speaker. He imagines her naked, in bed, wrapping herself up in a sheet to leave the room. Envy shreds his stomach. He wants to puke and punch a hole through the bar wall.

The background voices are silenced. He pulls his phone away from his face, wondering if she might have hung up.

"Hales?" He says, softer this time. "You still there?"

"Yeah. I'm here," she answers.

"Good."

"It was the TV, you know." Haley's voice is still soft, like the skin of her lips.

Nathan's eyes clench. Darkness invades. He's an idiot.

"I was watching Dirty Dancing. I couldn't sleep."

"Of course," he laughs, "your favorite movie. I should have known."

It's comforting to know that, in the month they've been apart, she hasn't changed.

"You were jealous." Not a question, but a fact. There's no point in arguing.

"Yes."

"We're broken up."

Another fact. One he hates.

"I know. I still miss you, though. Is that ok?"

He traces the rim of the whiskey glass. The bartender gestures, silently asking if he wants another. Nathan shakes his head no.

"I miss you, too." Haley's words are coated in a sweet whisper- so soft, he has to strain to hear them.

He briefly contemplates telling her about the drink he bought for a woman earlier in the night. He'd gone so far as even asking for her number- then deleted it when she left. He thought about taking her home, wondered if she'd be bandage for the pain. He couldn't do it. She wasn't Haley- he'd only been drawn to the woman because she had the same perfume as her. The scent alone sent him spiraling down a path of perilous "what if" and "maybes."

Why did they ever call it quits?

He hopes this phonecall doesn't end bad, like the ones from the other nights. He hopes, maybe, just maybe, they can talk about the past - and a possible future- without one of them hanging up.

"Haley-,"

"Nathan-,"

Their laughs intertwine like thread through the phone.

"Go ahead," Haley says.

"I, uh, I was wondering if…"

"Do you want to come over?"

His smirk widens, "I'll be there in ten minutes."

Breakups may come with rules, but Nathan and Haley were breaking them. After tonight, they'd never never spend another day alone.