Author's Note: Special thanks to my small band of reviewers! You guys make me happy. Chapter is dedicated to Milky Etoile.

Milky Etoile: You were my first reviewer! Yay! Hence the dedication of this chapter. And I really do appreciate your support and promise to wait patiently for this story. Hope you likey!

Lady Threarah: Thanks for your comments. If I can figure out how to change that review setting, I will... Urgh! Haha! Anyway, I'm glad you like my style.

And Kyomi Narumi: glitter heart stars I have a fan! glomps! Thanks for the reviews!


The Merciful Goddess watched the two dimensions carefully. Her assistant joined her, as he often did.

"If you'll forgive my ignorance, I wonder if I might ask what you are doing?" He eyed the goddess with a bit of skepticism. She was plotting something. She just had to be plotting something. Sanzo was the reincarnation of her nephew Konzen. There was no way she couldn't be plotting something for him.

"Oh, just making things a little more interesting, I suppose. Did you know that in this other dimension over here there is a group of four that reminds me strikingly of our own group of hoodlums?" The Merciful Goddess gestured grandly at one half of the pond where Draco could be seen mercilessly attacking Neville and Ron with his newly conjured paper fan. Her assistant stepped forward and eyed the youths warily.

"Aren't they technically out of your jurisdiction?"

"Ha! Nothing is impossible for me!" She went off on a little chant and dance, exasperating her faithful attendant.

"I never thought that, Your Worship. But, they are in another dimension…"

"Pish. I've already made contact with the ruling deity over there, and he decided to let me do what I want with those four there in exchange for a favor later on." The Merciful Goddess waved her hand dismissively before rubbing her palms together. "Now, let's see what these four can do…"

Draco huffed in deep breaths, feeling remarkably better after hitting Ron and Neville over the head repeatedly with the fan. He banished it as it was beyond salvation. He allowed himself a small smile despite the present company. Harry had to keep from laughing at his Gryffindor friends as they rubbed their sore skulls. Ron and Neville were scowling at Draco, aching to get back at him.

"Well? Can we have a truce now?" Draco drawled after a few moments of enduring death glares. He stood taller than Neville by a few inches, met Harry inch for inch, and seemed diminutive compared to Ron, but his presence seemed to tower over all of them.

"S-sure, Malfoy." Neville spoke up quietly. He had to trust that Harry knew what he was doing when it came to the Ferret.

"Well, that's good to hear, Longbottom. I mean, after all, you've had a rough life. I'd hate to be the cause of any more pain. You come from a long time of powerful, pureblooded witches and wizards." Draco actually looked relieved that Neville had accepted the offer of a truce. He did feel bad for the boy: crazy parents that didn't recognize you and a harsh grandmother were too much for one person to have to deal with. It was enough to cause even the strongest of people to mess up the simplest of things. Maybe that's why Neville had so many problems. Neville eyed him with something bordering on awe. "How 'bout you, Weasel—y?" Draco was trying to be nice, he really was. The Weasleys were a good family if you could look past the issue of status. But, since Harry could do it, why couldn't he? After all, Draco strove to be better than Harry in everything.

"Hn." Ron grunted angrily, then shot a glance at Harry who had an eyebrow raised expectantly. "Fine. I suppose if you stay out of my way, I'll stay out of yours as much as possible."

"That's all I ask." Draco couldn't keep the overtone of superiority out of his voice as he spoke. He turned to leave and rejoin his fellow Slytherins. But as he was about to step, a whirlwind swept through the hall. Draco, Harry, Ron, and Neville all shouted and tried to get out of the way of the menacing wind, but to no avail. They were caught up in it and whisked away.

"What do you think the likelihood of getting through this canyon without meeting any assassins is?" Hakkai asked, more as a joke than out of any seriousness, as he pointed to a spot on a map.

"You know it's not going to happen, and I know it's not going to happen, so why are we even discussing this?" Sanzo didn't even look up from his newspaper.

"True, but here's a question for you: fangirls or assassins?" Hakkai's amusement was evident as he easily sidestepped the whirling paper fan.

"Don't even joke about stuff like that." Gojyo piped up from his game of cards with Goku. "Fangirls are seriously scary shit. I mean, this one time…" He was cut off by a quick punch in the arm from Goku.

"Yeah, no one cares. Just leave it at 'fangirls are scary' and play the damn game!" Goku was grumpy: he hadn't eaten anything in close to two hours and so he was hungry… again. Gojyo was about to retaliate, but with a warning glance from Hakkai and a gun aimed at him from Sanzo, he wisely decided that now was not a good time to deal out justice, no matter how well-deserved. Instead, he turned his attention back to the cards half-heartedly.

"Wouldn't it be nice," Gojyo began wistfully after a few moments of nothing but Sanzo's and Hakkai's hushed whispers over the map, "if there were another Sanzo party? I mean one that could go West for us or at least deal with all the assassins for us so that we could get this task over with already? I mean, not that I don't LOVE doing this, but it's been a year and a half on the road with you losers, and I haven't had decent sex in at least two months."

"What are you talking about, you half-brained half-breed?" Sanzo barked irritably. He held up a hand and began counting. "There was the redhead with the freckles and green eyes, the pink-haired chick with the ferret fetish, that one girl with glasses who had an aversion to feet, a brunette who was a youkai assassin in disguise, a cross-dresser that even GOKU identified but you didn't."

"And don't forget when Gojyo got drunk and brought back that really ugly woman and her brother and slept with them both." Goku added, grinning wildly at Gojyo's increasing discomfort.

"Or the time that he convinced us to play drunk truth-or-dare with him, and we all ended up making out with him and then…" Three pairs of hands clamping over his mouth immediately cut off Hakkai's addition. All of their faces were strikingly pale.

"NEVER mention that again!" Sanzo warned in a low, strained voice. He yanked his hands out of the pile, causing the other two to lower their hands as well.

"Yeah, no kidding. As if I ever wanted to remember having your tongue down my throat…" Gojyo grimaced.

"Actually, Gojyo, if I recall correctly, and I WOULD as I'm NEVER drunk, you had your tongue down MY throat." Hakkai bristled slightly. He'd not even wanted to play the stupid game, having a sneaking suspicion as to the direction of the game. But, the other three were already so drunk that they needed a caretaker present or else they might fall to harm. Besides, Sanzo's gun is a very persuasive speaker when pressed firmly and unflinchingly against your temple…

"ALL RIGHT! I get the point! There's no need to go off on my sex life like that. I was just simply stating how nice it would be if there could be someone out there to do the work for us or make it a little easier." Gojyo hated when his best friend got angry at him. Not that he didn't deserve it most of the time, but it still sucked mondo or excessively or whatever adverb they were currently using...

"Tea?" Hakkai acted as if no argument had occurred. That was just how Hakkai was. He forgave and forgot. Currently, he was forgetting. Sanzo was the only one who held out a cup for a refill on the beverage. Sanzo could be such an old man at times; it was ridiculous. "And yes, it would be nice if by some miracle we could have our jobs made easier by another 'Sanzo' Party, as long as that didn't interfere with the possibility of our getting decent lodgings along the way." Hakkai was ever-practical in his analysis of the hypothetical situation. For some reason, Gojyo didn't think his emotionally-unstable head-case of a friend really understood the joys of daydreaming…

"But there's no such group, there has never been such a group, nor will there EVER be such a group. We're stuck with each other on this stupid mission. So quit your whining and let me read!" Sanzo's gaze never left his newspaper. The hand that held his cigarette also raised his tea glass to his mouth for the occasional sip. The monk had a talent for letting the wind out of the dream sails. Almost thankfully, Goku didn't really pay attention to Sanzo's order/request.

"What do you think this other group would be like? Would they be like us at all?"

Gojyo snorted as he extinguished his own cigarette and took a swig of beer. "Use that dusty antique you call a brain, monkey boy. Do you honestly think there could ever be a person in this world with such a disposition as that of the Almighty Sanzo?" The kappa narrowly avoided a vicious gunshot. His heartbeat had quickened the pace quit suddenly. "Dammit, Sanzo! One of these days you'll actually hit me and then where would we be?"

"A whole hell of a lot happier." Sanzo grumbled irritably. (A/N: It's sort of hard NOT to grumble irritably, don't you think?)

"That may be, but you'd be sorely lacking in my skills. You'd be up to you tight-ass pants in youkai assassins that you couldn't handle without me around."

"Yes, it's very fortunate that I have your stinking carcass to trip over."

Gojyo ignored the comment and turned his attention back to Goku. "See, Goku? Sanzo's certainly unique in his level of civility. I doubt that such a kindred soul exists out there in this world."

Little did Gojyo know, not only did such a soul exist, but it was currently swearing up a storm and hexing every rock in sight in an expanse of desert not too far from the town.