Chapter Forty-Three
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Hermione arrived back at her rooms before Severus and was grateful for that. It gave her time to fix a cup of tea. She wrapped shaking hands around it, taking a moment to breathe, away from accusing stares of the world.
Hermione tried not to let her mind linger. But it was so hard. What she had done to Lisa had not been cheating in the strictest sense of the word. The duelling judges would not expel her from the competition - opponents could intimidate their competitors with words if they wanted. But it was not acceptable conduct under proper standards of behaviour. Lisa, angry at her stolen win, had no doubt told everybody.
Hermione sat on her bed and drew her legs up, trying to work through the ramifications. But the consequences were too tangled. The Slytherins would not care that she cheated but would be interested to learn that she was not skilled enough to win. They loved weakness. Hermione took a sip of tea, scalding her throat but barely noticing the pain.
It would have been easy to win the duel if she hadn't let herself be distracted. But too many things had clouded her mind. Severus; the baby; her sham marriage...all had been impossible to overlook. She had been distracted, and that distraction had pushed her to behave without honour.
Mad-Eye Moody would have been furious with her. What had he taught her? Never let personal emotions interfere in a fight - it was the fastest way to get killed. What if she had been facing someone aiming to kill? She would have been dead, and the baby with her.
The door opened as Hermione was washing her cup in the sink. She rinsed it under the cold water, delaying as long as possible, and placed it on the draining board.
"Nothing to say?" Severus said.
Hermione turned around, keeping her hands behind her back to hide how they trembled. Severus was still angry. It was there in the lines of his body, his tight posture and folded arms. He wanted a fight.
"I don't think we need to talk about this," she said, trying to keep her voice even.
"No?" Severus said, crossing to his bed and unbuttoning his robes.
"Arabel made her choice," Hermione said.
"After you backed her into a corner with another fucking example of your inability to keep from killing every person you don't like," Severus snapped.
And there it was, out in the open.
"I thought you said you knew I didn't do it," Hermione, clenching her fists.
Severus shrugged off his robes. "I don't know what you're capable of these days."
"I didn't kill Grindelwald," Hermione said, voice rising. "I don't know who killed him or why his body was left there but I didn't bloody well do it, Severus! I might be a murderer but I'm not a fucking liar. Look inside my mind if you want proof!"
"You used occlumency on the Dark Lord himself, so do you really think I'll believe anything I see in your mind?" Severus said.
"I'll take veritaserum, I'll do anything, I didn't do it!" Hermione said, taking a step forward, nearly incoherent with rage.
"Don't bother," Severus said, pulling clean robes from the wardrobe. "As Dumbledore said, it doesn't matter if you killed him or not. But can you imagine if Arabel had actually been taken to the ministry?"
"It would have been bad," Hermione said. "But Severus I didn't-"
"And what about that little display in the arena earlier then?" Severus continued. "Are you telling me you didn't curse Lisa Johnson into throwing that duel to you?"
"I didn't curse her - I just - I needed to win!" Hermione shouted. "The Dark Lord ordered me to get to the final - if I fail do you really think he'll keep me updated?"
"It doesn't sound like he does anyway," Severus said.
Hermione fell silent. She was so angry she was shaking yet she wanted to cry.
"That's not my fault," she said quietly. "I'm doing the best I can."
Severus picked up his wand from the bed, and his shoulder slumped. The anger seemed to drain from him until only exhaustion remained.
"I know. But maybe that's the problem," he said and opened the door.
"Where are you going?" Hermione asked.
"Dinner. Some of us have had a very long day," Severus said, and without another word, he let the door slam shut behind him. Hermione gritted her teeth as her eyes stung and burned from suppressing tears. Emotion had taken over her before. She couldn't let it again.
Hermione stumbled to the shower, turning up the spray until it was so hot it was painful to the touch. Pulling off her tattered, sooty duelling robes, she released the concealment charm on her stomach, sighing with relief as the tight band loosened and her bump ballooned. It grew larger every day now. The duel had left cuts and bruises all over her.
Hermione stood under the shower until her skin turned red and towelled herself off vigorously. Her skin tingled and burned without relief. Unable to face eating downstairs with the other students, Hermione took a pain potion and went to bed. She tried to sleep, but despite herself, she was still only feigning it when Severus returned to the room.
Severus cleared his throat. "Hermione?"
Lying still, Hermione kept her breaths deep and even.
"Are you awake?"
Hermione didn't move. Severus sighed and put something on the dresser with a clatter.
Eyes half-lidded, Hermione watched him. Undressing slowly, he slumped on the sofa. His face was so tired. Earlier today, his strength had drawn her admiration. He was growing into his adult self. But there were the beginning of the lines and the weariness too.
He sat on the edge of the sofa for a long time, staring into nothing. Then he laid down and pulled the blanket over himself.
"Nox," he muttered, and the lights went out.
Hermione tried to close her eyes and sleep again, but it refused to take her. Severus's breaths told her that he was not asleep yet either. Strange how you could grow to be familiar with the sound of someone's breathing.
Beyond the window, the black lake was still, without the slightest flicker of movement from a fish or grindylow. Hermione rolled over and stared out into the depths, pressing her hand to the glass. It was hot in the room, and the beads of condensation soothed her.
"Severus," she whispered into the darkness.
His breathing paused for a moment and resumed. He made no reply, though he had heard.
"Severus, I'm sorry."
No reply. Hermione's eyes burned, and she squeezed them shut, but she could not prevent the tears from leaking out. She shook silently, hoping his eyes were closed.
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Hermione awoke to darkness her head fuzzy and pain coming from somewhere. She could not remember falling asleep, but now her head ached, and her eyes itched. Severus's snores filled the room. She rolled over, trying to find what had awakened her and realised that faint buzzing noise was coming from her small blue bag. Wide awake at once, Hermione sat bolt upright.
Severus was fast asleep, feet hanging off the sofa and head tipped back. The room was lit by a faint glow coming from her small beaded bag. Hermione reached for it, fumbling with the straps in trembling haste and finally getting the clasp open. She reached inside and withdrew a thick leather pouch, from which she tipped the Dark Mark pendant into her hand.
It was buzzing and glowing.
Hermione had stopped wearing the dark mark around her neck. It was uncomfortable and itched of dark magic. But by adding a buzz and glow to it, she had made it into an alarm that she wouldn't miss.
"Tempus," Hermione hissed, and numbers appeared in the air. It was midnight.
"For fuck's sake," she muttered, sitting upright and unable to suppress an enormous yawn. She had barely slept for more than half an hour, and she felt all the worse for it. Severus grunted and rolled over, opening his eyes.
Hermione stood and went to the wardrobe, searching for the robes at the back.
"What are you doing?" Severus asked, sitting up.
"Go back to sleep."
"Not if you're about to cause more trouble I won't."
"For fuck's sake, I'm being summoned by Voldemort," Hermione snarled. "Happy now?"
Severus's mouth fell open, and he closed it slowly. He rubbed at his eyes and pulled the blankets around his shoulders, eyebrows drawing together with worry.
"Well - does Dumbledore know?"
"No, there's no time. I can't be late again."
"I'll tell him," Severus said, standing up and pulling on a dressing gown.
Hermione wanted to protest but didn't. She needed him. Nodding in thanks, she pulled out the pitch-black Death Eaters robes. She drew them over her arms and buttoned them up down the front. Then she pulled a box from the bottom of the wardrobe and withdrew a small silver mask. Severus watched without saying anything. Hermione tucked her mask into her pocket and picked up the dark mark pendant and her wand.
"Be careful," Severus said. "For - for the baby."
Hermione hesitated.
"I will."
Hermione turned to the door when something caught her eye. On the dresser was a plate of food. Had Severus brought it for her? Hermione steeled herself. Not now. Not the time to consider it.
As she made her way up the stairs towards the entrance hall, she considered the lie she had told. She couldn't be careful, and she wouldn't. She could only do what had to be done, and if this was their best chance of taking down Voldemort, then she would carry it out.
Hermione crossed the grounds in a hurry, shivering in the cold night air. She let herself out of the front gates - after the previous incident with Grindelwald, Dumbledore had given her a key. Hermione placed the elaborate silver mask against her face. Returning the dark mark to her forearm, she pressed it hard with her index finger and disapparated, following where the mark led.
The mark led once again to Lestrange Manor. Hermione appeared at the front gates and, a second later, another crack followed, and another masked figure appeared beside her. They nodded to each other in greeting.
"Sister," said a male voice.
"Brother," Hermione replied. Then, noticing a lock of blonde hair emerging from the hood, "Malfoy?"
"Black," Malfoy sneered.
"Black-Snape" Hermione corrected automatically.
"Can't believe you actually took on a muggle name," Malfoy said.
"Can't believe you're still here," Hermione muttered.
"Please Black, the real mystery is that the Dark Lord hasn't seen through your bullshit yet," Malfoy drawled.
"At least I don't collapse crying when somebody pokes me with a wand," Hermione snorted. "And the Dark Lord made me second-in-command, or don't you remember that little piece of information?"
"You might be second-in-command black, but the Dark Lord has honoured my family beyond what you could even begin to comprehend," Malfoy said.
The wrought iron gates creaked open, and they stepped inside and began the walk up the long drive together.
"What do you mean?" Hermione asked curiously.
Hermione couldn't see Malfoy's face, but she knew somehow that he was smirking.
"Private business Black. The Dark Lord only tells these things to people he really trusts. Not half-baked orphans like you."
"I outrank you Malfoy," Hermione said wearily. "I'm not sure when you're going to realise that. Perhaps when the Dark Lord orders me to get rid of you."
"Are you two squabbling again?" A voice behind them said.
Hermione and Malfoy turned to see another robed figure catching them up, and they paused to wait. The person briefly lifted their mask and Malfoy sighed.
"Father."
Abraxas Malfoy placed his mask back on his face and patted Lucius on the shoulder.
"Tried to get here before me, did you?"
"Hardly - we don't even live together," Malfoy said, his voice becoming the petulant whine of a teenager. Hermione suppressed a smirk.
"Well done on beating daddy," she murmured under her breath.
Abraxas gave a hearty chuckle. "I hear you're the one who deserves the well done Madam Snape," he said.
"I do?" Hermione said, confused.
"Indeed," Abraxas said. "Straight into the duelling final. I wasn't able to be there today - work business - but I was very pleased to hear it. I believe what we hear tonight should cement our plans nicely."
This was intriguing, and Hermione tilted her head. "Is that so Lord Malfoy?"
Abraxas was about to answer but was interrupted by Lucius.
"I heard she cheated," he snorted. "Crouch said there's a rumour going around that she just threatened the other girl until she threw the duel."
"That's hardly a crime," Abraxas said mildly. "I believe I have had to threaten several people to have them move out of your way Lucius. Why just the other day..."
Lucius spluttered in protest and Hermione marched ahead up the drive while father and son bickered behind her. She had no desire to take part in the conversation and stopped at the large oak doors. Before she could knock the house elf opened the doors.
It was a frightened-looking elf, Hermione noticed. Its ears were flattened back, and it wouldn't look up from the ground as it squeaked out a formal greeting.
"Come on Tilly take us in," Abraxas said, stepping up behind Hermione. "What the devil is the matter with you?"
The house-elf murmured something in an indistinguishable voice and took their cloaks, leading them through the house to the ballroom that Hermione remembered. A cloaked man stood outside the doors, his face hidden behind the mask.
"Identify yourselves," he said in a bored voice.
"Abraxas and Lucius Malfoy, Hermione Black-Snape," Abraxas said. "Good evening Rodolphus. My deepest condolences on the death of your lovely wife."
If he was disingenuous at all, it was impossible to tell in his voice. Rodolphus nodded.
"Yes I am bereft," he said dryly.
"I have no doubt that the Dark Lord is sorely missing her services," Abraxas said. "You must find a replacement soon."
"Thank you for your thoughts for me," Rodolphus said. "I shall be considering the matter over the summer."
"I believe the house of Selwyn has a daughter approaching her majority," Abraxas said. "Is that not correct Lucius?"
"Yes," Lucius said sulkily. "She's one of Black-Snape's crowd. Which is her biggest defect."
"I will give it some thought," Rodolphus said. "She would indeed be suitableā¦"
Hermione bit back an angry retort.
"Gentlemen I believe Miss Selwyn may already be spoken for," she said through gritted teeth. "Now I think we should not keep the Dark Lord waiting any longer."
"Quite," murmured Abraxas. "Lead on Madam."
Rodolphus pulled open the door for them, and Hermione stepped through into the ballroom. It was a beautiful room even when not adorned with wedding flowers and white streamers. And it was full. Every Death Eater appeared to be gathered. They stood about in small groups talking in low voices and looking about one another.
Rodolphus slipped in through the door behind them and shut it with a thud. All noise ceased. A moment later, a door at the other end of the room banged open, and Lord Voldemort strode through. He too wore the full robes of a Death Eater but no mask. Stopping in the middle of the room, he smiled at them all.
"Greetings brothers and sisters. Thank you for joining us tonight. We are here to celebrate a victory."
Hermione frowned. This couldn't be about the duelling competition. It wasn't a great victory - it was a school competition. She noticed that many of the assembled Death Eaters appeared confused, but nobody broke the silence. Voldemort continued.
"Today the leader of our Hogwarts forces, Madam Hermione Black-Snape, took part in the semi-final of the International Wizarding Schools Duelling competition."
Further confused murmuring.
"She won a place in the final which will take place at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in three months. The final is a large event, attended by thousands of witches and wizards from across the globe. It is the only time in Hogwarts history that large numbers of outside visitors are invited into the school walls."
Dawning understanding and a low, eager mutter passed around the room.
"Yes, you understand me correctly," Voldemort said. "This is the day that we will take our place in wizarding history. We will be inside Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, we will kill the fool Dumbledore and the Minister of Magic, and we will start our new republic of Magic that day."
His voice rose towards the end of the speech, and the Death Eaters began to cheer. He spread his hands graciously and watched them with the expression of a benevolent dictator. Then he turned.
"Where is Hermione Black-Snape?"
Hermione stepped forward. Her hands were trembling, but she kept them inside the folds of her robes to hide it.
"Madam Black-Snape we are grateful for the work you have done to create this opportunity for us," Voldemort said.
"It was an honour," Hermione replied.
"I am glad to hear you say it," Voldemort said. He turned to the Death Eaters.
"Some of you may remember that I announced last summer that Hermione Black would assume the place of second in command next summer following her marriage. I am pleased to tell you that that appointment shall be set on the day we topple Hogwarts and the ministry, and Hermione will have the honour of playing a special role in my victory."
Hermione froze, relieved her face was hidden behind the mask and watched him warily.
"Indeed," Voldemort continued. "It will be her honour to kill Albus Dumbledore and so secure her appointment at my right hand."
The Death Eaters began to cheer again, and Hermione nodded, trying to look pleased.
"So!" Voldemort said, clapping his hands. "We have three months to prepare. In that time I will expect you all here regularly. We will be undergoing a special pattern of training in duelling magic. There can be no mistake in this operation, and every one of you will be drilled thoroughly to ensure you know what you are to do. This opportunity that we have engineered has never come before and may never come again. We must seize it."
Hermione stood, throat dry, as the Death Eaters burst out into excited talk and cheering, and Lord Voldemort began to circulate amongst them. Her stomach churned, and her skull was tight. This was the beginning of the end. Now they knew. This would be the final battle. This, on the sands of the duelling arena far below Hogwarts, would be where it all ended.
She had to have the Horcruxes by then, or they were finished.
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Back! I won't make update promises because I have a bad habit of breaking them, but...it's going to get finished at least! I've just started my masters, which is so much fun and I think I'm going to love it, but it's also reasonably stressful for pandemic/parenting reasons, and I am REALLY needing this fanfiction outlet right now. Thanks so much to those who have reviewed and sent the love. Sorry 'bout all the angst. It might get worse before it gets betterā¦
Cas
