Chapter Five: Amalia

10/9

NBook, my old friend! Long time no see, amigo. I should be doing homework, but when is that important? Not really. Not with everything that's happening.

This is my week:

Monday
School.
Work.
Brendan's.
Homework.

Tuesday
School.
Rehearsal.
Brendan's.
Homework.

Wednesday
School.
Work.
Rehearsal
Homework.

If you haven't noticed, there's a pattern. Homework is half-assed too. So far, I'm averaging about a C. I averaged a B+ last year. I'm so lucky that Mami and Papi understand that everything that's going on is important to me. I need to do what I can to pull my average, though. Oh well.

Rainah sent me the tape she made of band last week. It's amazing. They sound so great. Sure, it still sounds like a tape made in a garage. Rainah sounds really excited about getting the band in the studio.

"What do you think?" she asks me when she calls about the tape last night.

"I think they sound great!" I exclaim. "What do YOU think?"

"I think they sound pretty good too. I'm hoping to get them in for a studio recording around the first of November."

"WHAT?"

Rainah laughs. "I had three calls about them in the last month. The people of Palo City want Vanish. And so do the people of North Palo. I just got a call about a job there over Halloween."

"Oh, wow, yes, we're there. Well, I need to talk to the band first, but... I'm all for it."

"I figured you might be. Just call me back whenever you talk to the band."

Rainah is really nice. I can't figure out why I'm even still around, though. Rainah's job is to find small bands, turn them in local city bands, and when they start to outgrow that, send them bigger label managers so they can be national. Not many bands reach that point, but that's what the woman does. It's HER job to talk to the band about gigs. I'm like a messenger service, maybe?

She doesn't need a fourteen year old garage band manager.

So what am I doing here?

Today, I spend at Brendan's. Okay, I've sort of become housekeeper and cook, but I'll do whatever I can to help. I'm sleepy, but what else am I going to do? Plus Dedree always thanks me a lot. I insist that it's my pleasure, but it's nice to know that I'm appreciated.

And Brendan... he's not mister chatty or anything (well, he can be, but he's not lately), but anymore, he hardly talks at all. I've seen him in his parents bedroom talking with John, but I can only guess why. He's worried. He wants to make sure that if anything happens, his dad knows he loves him.

I can understand that. I guess he's just talked out. But I'll be here.

I'm spazzing. I have so much on my plate right now. I don't know how I'm doing it. I don't know how I'm going to keep this up without collapsing. I don't want anyone to know it's like this. They can't. Because if they figure it out, Mami and Papi won't let me work (which is really great, Mr. Winslow is fantastic about my scheduling and I LIKE working there), and I won't be allowed to keep up with the band.

So, this is just between you and me, NBook.

10/10

Practice today. Sunday, I know, but I had to work this out. I missed Thursday's practice because of work, so I needed to be there.

I walk into the garage, and they started already. Maggie waves to me between chords and I wave back. I sit down next to Ducky who(m?) I knew was there because his car is outside as opposed to Justin's.

"Hey," I say.

"Hey," he replies. He gives me a closer look. "Amalia, are you okay?"

I love Ducky so much, he can just tell your problems by looking at you. However, in the spirit of keeping my problems to myself, I say in a joking voice, "Don't go inventing problems for me, Ducky."

He smiles, but he obviously doesn't buy it. He doesn't push the issue, though. "Well, if any real ones turn up, I'm here."

"Thanks." My eyes wander around the room and they stop at the trough. Inspecting a doughnut is a girl I've never seen before in my life. She's Asian, and about eighteen. Her black skirt is so short it's nearing belt qualification (Hello Kitty panties are in, so I hear). Her red and white striped shirt is ripped up and torn, her black hair is done up in dreadlocks, and she's wearing a lot of makeup.

Instead of jumping to conclusions, I nudge Ducky with my elbow. "Who's that?"

"Oh, that's Shan Mei Lee. She's a senior at Palo High. She's Rico's... well, I think she's his girlfriend. Or at least that's what Rico is leading us to believe. She was at the last practice. She's not very friendly."

"Rico?" I repeat. "But..."

"According to Bruce, this is the second Asian girl Rico's dated since Claudia left," Ducky says, reading my thoughts.

"Oh... well, then." I have no idea how to handle that. Not that Rico needs me to be up to date on who he's dating. I am annoyed, however, when Rico doesn't hear me announce that the break is over and I found him in the kitchen making out with Shan Mei.

Does he think they're rock superstars already?

I tell them about the show in North Palo over Halloween, and, as I predicted, all for it.

"What's the pay?" Bruce asks, his eyes gleaming.

"Rainah and I didn't get into the details, but I'm sure money is involved. Just clear your schedules, all right?" I look at Maggie, and she's nodding. I never know what her schedule is like. But she's really great about making time for the band. It's a real priority for her, and Maggie has her priorities straight.

Unlike crazy me.

After practice is over, I stay behind and chat with Maggie.

"Want a ride home?" she asks.

"Sure, thanks." Everyone else is leaving, so we start walking outside.

"How's Mr. Jones?" Her head is cocked in a concerned pose.

I sigh. "He's doing okay. Or as okay as he can be. I know he's just relieved to be home. Even if he's still sick, being home is so much better than being at the hospital. It's so frustrating for me, though because Brendan is just closing up. Around me, anyway. I guess I can understand, but..."

"Damn it?" Maggie suggests.

"Damn it," I agree, smiling a little.

"How are YOU, Amalia? You look tired."

"I am tired," I admit. "But I'm keeping up. I'm doing all right. The bright side of spending all my time at Brendan's is the built in study buddy."

Maggie frowns.

"What?"

"Nothing," she says. Reg pulls up and we get in. I get my ride home.

Actually at my house. Not Brendan's. Is it wrong that this should feel so weird? I should feel comfortable in my home. All I can think about is what I'm missing. What could happen. What if something goes wrong?

I should feel comfortable in my own house. I sort of feel like a stranger here. Like I'm a guest.

I know, I think too much, NBook. Maybe I should just sleep.