Chapter 22
Glasgow5 July 2004
I go back inside after she closes the door. I didn't think I could feel worse than I did when I saw the proof that I hurt Buffy, but I was wrong. Dawn, she's a kid, for all she pretends not to be. And I let her down. I know it. I let her down by not being in Sunnydale when she needed me, when everything started going wrong. I let her down when I hurt Buffy, when I wasn't someone she could rely on any more. I knew that. I mean, she made it clear enough when I was in Sunnydale, what with threatening to set me on fire and all, even if she was mainly angry at what happened between Buffy and me. Still, I'd sort of hoped that with time, she might have forgiven me. And maybe she had when she thought I was dead, but now?
Buffy. Despite everything, I actually felt a glimmer of hope. She looked at me, and it was like the old days, the two of us, recognising Dawn's temper and just knowing that we had to deal with it. And she hasn't staked me, or even hit me yet. Still, that might mean she cares so little that I'm not worth the effort.
I go into the living room where I've got a couple of books I took from upstairs. They're not that special – just what you might call primers in magic, but one of them's actually pretty good, explaining the purpose of different types of ingredient. Not that I'm going to solve all the problems, it's just a question of trying to understand the general principles - maybe enough that I'd at least understand the basis of a plan to put it right.
I wonder if Giles will keep his word and send someone to stake me if Buffy doesn't. The thought comes to me despite my best intention to keep reading the book. Truth is, if that's what happens, then so be it. I'd like to be the one who finally works out what's happening to the Slayers, but now that Buffy's on the job …
With an effort, I stop myself. I give up for now, and switch on my newly-acquired TV. Not actually that much choice since I haven't signed up for a satellite dish or cable, but there's an old episode of that medical thing – you know – man from the coroner's office. Quincy, that's it. It's suitably mindless and I just need something to take my mind off the fact that I don't know where I am any more.
Early evening becomes late evening, and it's even dark enough, what with the cloud cover, that I could probably venture out without having to worry about frying. I'm aware of noises from next door. Generally, I don't hear a lot. These old buildings, the walls are thick and solid. Most sound is muffled even to vamp hearing, but I know that there's something going on. I assume it's Buffy ranting about something, and I can't help it, I listen.
Not that I have to, since a couple of minutes later, someone's thumping on my door. I jump up to answer it, and find Buffy on the other side.
"Spike, it's Dawn. I … I know … I don't have any right to ask, but I need your help."
I turn away from her long enough to pick up my jacket and follow her outside. The look of relief on her face as I turn back to her is enough to let me know that she really didn't know that I'd drop everything for her.
"What happened?"
"After she spoke to you, she went out. She said she was going to a park Gus mentioned. I didn't even question it. By the time I was getting worried and spoke to Moira, she'd been gone a couple of hours. Turns out this park's not just round the corner. I've tried calling her cell, but it's going straight to her messaging service. It's probably out of charge – either that or she's turned it off."
"Right," I answer. I check the time. "How long's she been gone?"
"Over three hours now. When I found out which park Gus mentioned to her, he offered to drive me over there. We've spent the last half hour or more looking for her, asking around. No one remembers seeing her, and there's no sign she was ever there."
"You called the police?"
"Er … no. I thought … you know, if you would help, you'd be more likely to find her."
"Police here aren't quite as bad as Sunnydale, you know, but you're probably right. Let's get outside and we'll see if I can pick up something. Where's Gus?"
"He's checking the streets around here in the car. He dropped me back here to get you."
Humans all smell. I don't mean that in an insulting way, it's just, you know, predator here. Humans are my natural prey. Doesn't matter how clean you are, how recently you showered, there's a smell. Best smells, though, come from humans who're in an emotional state. Fear, anger, misery, they all have a distinct tang that's different from person to person but which share some common characteristics. I've smelt out an angry Dawn often enough in the past that I soon pick it up.
The downside is that while she heads in the general direction of the park, she seems to have been side-tracked by one of the busiest shopping streets in the city. Once there, it's nearly impossible to find her scent among the remains of the scents of hundreds of shoppers who thronged the streets earlier. Even now, with the shops closed, there're still enough people around to confuse the issue.
"What was she doing around here?" Buffy demands as I come up blank yet again. She's angry - at Dawn, but at me too. Well, I'm angry at me too, so I can't blame her. There's just too much around here for me to pick her out.
"Shops must've closed not long after she got here. Where d'you think she'd have gone then?"
"If she didn't come back, then I assume she went to the park."
"Let's go that way, then, and see if I pick up something. If I can't, then we've got to call the police."
Of course, my hunt for Dawn's scent hasn't been helped by the overpowering one that's filling my nostrils - Buffy's fear. Instinctively, I put an arm around her shoulders as I turn her around. As soon as I realise what I've done, I'm ready to take my arm away again, but far from avoiding the contact, she actually leans into it. That seems to have been instinctive too, because she soon straightens up and away from me, so I move my arm then. I pick up the pace, moving towards the park as quickly as we can, but once we're out of the shopping area, we've got to cross a road complex. There, there's not only human scent galore, but that is swamped by the various smells of motor vehicles.
Once we're through that, though, it's a fairly short walk to the entrance to the park, and by the time we're half way there, I pick up the faint essence of Dawn. I make sure, though, waiting until I've had several samples in a row.
"She came this way," I tell her.
"Is there a vamp problem around here?" she demands. Hardly surprising since it's pretty dark by now.
"Not like Sunnydale, but it's a city. Bound to be a few around. Can't say I've found any here, though."
"Why wouldn't she come back if it was getting dark?"
"You know Dawn better than I do, but … thing about being this far north, dusk lasts a long time. It gets dark very gradually, and if you're out in it, it can be difficult to see it happening."
"So she just forgets everything she knows about being safe? She's so grounded when we find her."
At the back of my mind, though, is the possibility that we won't find her, and I know Buffy's thinking the same thing.
We reach the park to find that the gate's been closed for the night. A quick look around to make sure there's no one likely to get nosy, and we both climb over, landing in a pathway with rosebushes up both sides. That path opens out into a wide area with a hill to the left, and another ahead in the distance. I sample the air, trying to get a direction, and decide to move straight ahead. The path is lined with benches at regular intervals, and on the fifth one, the scent of Dawn is strong and different. I've been following diminishing levels of anger, but here, it's fear. I hold a hand up to Buffy, motioning her to stop while I see if there's anything else of note.
It's fear, and she wasn't alone. There's at least one other fear scent here, and there's blood too. There's one more scent, and I follow my nose to its source - a plastic carrier bag with some empty bottles. I don't need to look to know what it is, but I do anyway. Bloody Alco pops. Smell and taste like sugar, but they pack a wallop. If Dawn's been drinking that stuff, I'm going to kill whoever introduced her to it.
Buffy's looking at me, but then lifts one of the bottles to her nose and cautiously sniffs it.
"Alcohol tarted up to taste like a soft drink," I explain. "Lethal stuff, but popular with kids who don't know any better."
"You think Dawn's been drinking?"
"I don't know, but she was here for a while, and I think she was scared."
"Scared? Of what? Human? Demon?"
"Don't know, love. Can't smell demon, but some demons don't smell of much. I can smell blood, though, but it's not Dawn's. She wasn't alone, because Dawn's fear isn't the only terror I can sense"
It's too dark to see anything much, so I don't see any point in hanging around here.
"Reckon we should see if the trail continues," I suggest.
Buffy agrees, and we continue along the same path for a bit, before following another one left, up the hill. Sure enough, the scent continues - Dawn, but not alone. Only question is, did she walk or was she taken?
The trail continues all the way to the edge of the park, and we're met with another fence that needs to be climbed. This time, though, the other side is a long terrace of houses, many of which have been turned into hotels or student residences.
At number 44, the scent stops, so I stand back and leave Buffy to go and knock. Well, would you open your door if you saw me late at night? Not if you had any sense you wouldn't. But, if there's one thing all those years with Dru taught me, is that if you want a door opened, you send a helpless-looking woman to knock. Of course Dru was anything but helpless, and Buffy doesn't even need an invitation.
The person who approaches looks young through the glass panel of the door. Young and female, but not Dawn. She opens the door, though.
"I'm looking for my sister. I heard someone say they thought she might be here. American, tall, long brown hair." Buffy's voice sounds concerned, but she's marshalled the rising panic that I know she's feeling.
"American?" the girl replies in a distinctly American accent. "She should fit right in here then. What's her name?"
"Dawn. Her name's Dawn."
"No Dawn here, at least not living here."
She turns her back on us and yells into the house. "Anyone know a Dawn?"
"Dawn Summers," Buffy adds, and the girl repeats the name.
Buffy might be standing quietly for now, but I know she's one step away from pushing her way inside.
There's a thundering sound from the stairs, and a second later, Dawn's pushing past the door, and hugging Buffy.
"Dawn, I assume," the door-opener says. "Suppose you'd better come in, then."
Buffy looks at Dawn, checking her over. There're a few scratches, but nothing big that I can see. Dawn's not having it, though, and insists on pulling Buffy inside.
"They can come in, can't they?" she asks and gets a nod of agreement. From the look I get as I walk in, though, it looks like the other girl didn't spot me before giving the invitation. Still, it's enough, and there's no barrier at the door to stop me. Dawn drags Buffy up that same staircase, and along a short corridor, past a kitchen, to one of the rooms there. I follow, unsure what to do for the best.
Once inside, it's obvious where the scent of blood was coming from. There's a girl, lying on one of the twin beds in the room, while another girl is maniacally trying to clean a recent neck wound, although she's probably going to make it worse, the way she's going.
"What happened?" Buffy demands, but she's already moving towards the bed and taking a look at the injury.
"We were in the park, just chatting, and it got dark. I didn't even realise it was that late, and the girls were taking me with them so I could call you, and there was a vamp. He … he got Susie, didn't think Jeannie and I were a threat, but I found a pointed bit of fence panel, and …"
The other girl - Jeannie, I assume - looks to be in almost as bad a state as Susie, even if the cause is fear rather than actual injury. She moved aside for Buffy without complaint and retreated to the other bed where she's now sitting and hugging her knees, rocking slightly.
"Why haven't you called an ambulance?" I demand.
"N … no." That from Jeannie.
"Why not? She's been hurt. Surely …"
"No."
"What do you think?" I ask Buffy. I don't really need to hear her opinion; I can hear the girl's heart beat, which tells me she's scared, but not too bad otherwise.
"She's lost some blood, but I've seen a lot worse."
I relax at that. "What's the deal here?" I ask, addressing the words to Dawn.
"I don't know the details, just that it's a group from Iowa. They've come to attend some summer classes or something."
"Who's in charge?"
That gets a response from Jeannie, who jumps up from her position on the bed.
"No, you can't tell her. She'll send us home."
"And why would that be?"
"We … we had a few drinks. It's not illegal or anything, we're both eighteen, but … our parents, well, the Church isn't happy about liquor at any age."
"Church?"
"Yeah."
She's too shaken up to say any more - so I give up for now.
Buffy finishes dressing Susie's neck and turns to Dawn. I know that look - I've been on the receiving end of it a time or two.
"And you, Dawn? You're not legal, even here. Have you been drinking too?"
"No! I didn't. Well, just a sip, to, you know, try it."
She certainly doesn't seem to be under the influence of anything, and it looks like Buffy comes to the same conclusion as she relaxes a bit, but the inquisition isn't over yet.
"Why didn't you call? I've been worried sick."
"My cell's out of charge. I was coming here to call you, but then I realised that I don't know your cell number - I just speed dial from mine - and I don't know Moira's number. I was going to ask if they could look it up or something, but Susie looked really pale, and Jeannie, well, she was hysterical. It took us ages to carry Susie up here and sneak her into the house."
"And all the sneaking was because you were scared someone'd find you'd been drinking?" I address my question at Jeannie. She's still looking pretty spooked, but I wonder which has scared her more - being found out or nearly becoming a snack food for a vamp.
She nods, her eyes pleading for understanding.
"Well, looks like you were lucky," Buffy announces. "Susie here'll be fine. She'll need to keep that wound clean, but it should be ok. Make sure she drinks plenty of fluids in the next few days. I'd be happier if you had a doctor look at it, but I'm not going to force the issue."
A lot of the tension goes out of Jeannie's body at that. I, on the other hand, think she needs another good scare.
"I hope you've learned your lesson. Not about the booze - that's neither here nor there. There're things out there that'll kill you and worse, given half a chance. Sitting around in a park after dark isn't clever. You're bloody lucky we didn't find your lifeless bodies down there. Do you understand that?"
I've got both Jeannie's and Susie's attention at that, and both of them are looking at me with something akin to fear. Part of me enjoys the feeling, while another part of me feels slightly sick at the picture I've painted.
"Dawn, get your things."
Buffy's voice is unnaturally calm, and I sense some yelling to come.
Rather belatedly, I pull my mobile out and call Moira so she can stop worrying, and Gus, asking him if he can pick us up. He agrees, but while I can tell him the street number, I don't actually know the street name.
"What's the address here?" I ask Jeannie. She answers and I relay that to Gus.
"He'll be here in five minutes," I report. Buffy just nods.
Twenty minutes later, Gus drops us outside my place. Buffy ushers Dawn into Moira's, but stops to speak to me before following her inside.
"Thanks."
"No problem. You know I'll always help if I can."
It's no more than the truth, but it sounds bloody stupid.
"Will you? I mean, … I'm sorry. I didn't mean to doubt what you said. It's just … it's been a confusing day. I don't know what to think any more."
"I know what you mean," I agree. "But I made you a promise. I said I'd protect Dawn to the end of the earth. I don't make promises like that lightly."
"I know. It's just … "
"I know, I buggered off out of your life and didn't let you know about it. Stupid thing to do, I realise that now. There's no way fate was going to let me renege on my promise anyway."
"Is that all it is?"
Without my superior hearing, I doubt I'd have heard it.
"You mean, is it just because I feel obliged to protect Dawn?"
She nods.
"Bloody hell, woman. I care about Dawn. I'd be batting for her even if I hadn't promised."
"And …"
"And you. God help me, but I still love you. You're the centre of my world, even when you didn't know I was alive. Can't change it, I can only live with it best I can."
"So, what're we going to do?"
"Don't bloody know, but I'd say the next step's up to you."
I know it doesn't mean anything, but the next thing she does is step towards me, put her arms around my neck and kiss me on the lips. It's quick, and I've barely got time to respond, before she pulls away and runs for her door. I'm left with my lips tingling and every other part of me wanting to go and bring her back again, but I'm still none the wiser as to where I stand with her. I go inside and get myself one of those cans of beer. I haven't made it to a chair before I hear raised voices from the other flat. Sounds like Buffy's making it clear just how scared she was. And, oddly, Dawn's not screaming back. Maybe, just maybe, she's learned her lesson.
