What We Do In The Shadows: "Jen..."
Summary: There are unexpected consequences when Laszlo seeks a new human familiar…
Part XXXI…
Fieldersen Estate, night…
Large old tree in the deep of the grounds' forest…
"Well…" Laszlo perched in human form in his trademark black suit on branch, Nadja near…Voice low… "Here we are on what I've been told by my new human friend from the Staten Island Historic Preservation Society is one of the few surviving ancient elms on Staten Island. Nadja and I and Nandor naturally couldn't allow our dear Jen and Miss Eloise, our new werewolf and real estate associate, to risk themselves on our soon-to-be new grounds alone…"
Nadja, sour frown at him…
"I had every intention of coming out, lady wife." He notes plaintively.
"Yes, just as you were going to return and save me from the Vampiric Council." Grim reply.
"Indeed I was…" hurt tone. "Now, while I am a man of discretion and sense, have you ever known me not to risk myself for friends when I had them then and you since I did not?"
"Eh…" wave of hand. Sly smile to camera…
Cut to Nadja in, more or less, living room of old residence later this night…
"It's true, he's never not fought for me when it's come to that…But he does have an annoyingly practical sense of wanting to be sure the odds are in his favor if possible." Firm stare, then smile. "I know he was coming back that night with the Council. But, a wife does like to know her husband will die for her when required, without qualification or careful consideration of odds, right? I mean if I were living Gypsy girl in World War II, would he run from Nazis, leaving me, hoping to save me later? By then I'm in gas chamber, dead. Thanks, loads, lover." Frown…Sigh.
"Though it would be what I want, him surviving. I love him more than Unlife, after all. But you want to know he would die in gas chamber with you, you know? Still…" slight, then warming smile. "I know if there was no chance, he would stay and die with me. He has, often enough, nearly." Beam.
"You wicked bitch…" Laszlo, seated next to her, mock glare… "Thank you, lady wife." Pat, then kiss, of hand.
Back to tree perch some hours before…
"Well, that's hurtful…" Laszlo notes, a bit downcast. "But given we're here to see our faithful minion doesn't deprive her daughter of a mother, lets move on and see how they're getting on."
"Don't bat!" Nadja insists, genuinely anxious now. "Jen has anti-vampire stuff, she may not know it's you. Let Nandor do the viewing from the air, he can fly in normal form much better than we and she'll see him. Plus Guillermo is with him on ground, Eloise can sense him faster."
"That's true as to the flying…" Laszlo notes to camera. "Nandor has great ability in that regard. I'm rather jealous of it, actually. He can just 'take off' in vampiral form and fly round like Superman, impressing the ladies, without ever changing to bat form. I've tried but I just can't quite master it. My dark powers lie more in seduction and thrall, obviously." Lewd grin.
"Really?" Nadja, disdainful look. "I'd never noted that. Then again, perhaps you are just too fat to fly in normal form."
"Oh, that's charming…Right in front of our crew, you say that to me? It's not my fault, you know. In my day, a gentleman took on a bit of embellpont as a sign he was successful and prosperous." Sigh. "I use the stairmaster every day, religiously…"
"Fine…You are portly stud." She grins to camera after frowning at him.
Cuddly sexy portly stud…She breathes to camera.
"Lets just watch from here for a bit, we can sense most of what's about." She notes.
"Or we could try misting…I can do a fair mist when I put an effort in…" Laszlo, rather eagerly.
Nadja rolling eyes…
"I intended to condense into a puddle that time." He insists. "Perfect camouflage."
"A dog tried to drink you…" she glares.
…..
On the grounds…Just entering the woods of the estate…
Moon behind clouds just rising now…
Shine of flashlight…
"So Guillermo and I are here with Nadja and Laszlo…" Nandor notes as he presses back a branch, Guillermo behind, shining flashlight lantern to peer ahead. "…to see that Jennifer and our new werewolf friend, Eloise, are ok checking the grounds here. It seemed wrong to leave them alone when we weren't sure what might be lurking or haunting here."
"You'd better let me go first, Master." Guillermo urges. "Jen did say she'd keep some vampire implements with her just in case some other vampires are hiding out here."
Hmmn…
"That might be wise, Guillermo. Ok, you go first." He pauses, holding tree branch for his familiar who passes nervously. Both proceeding on…
"Guillermo? Did you bring the unmentionables and the hammer for the zombies?"
"I did Master…And my personal unmentionable is round my neck, under my collar." He pats hidden crucifix.
"Good. And you did spray yourself again with the scent Ms. Eloise gave you before?"
"Yes, Master. I think you can smell it. I can."
Hmmn. Nandor sniffs…
"No, not really anything different. I think it matches your usual."
"Oh." Slight sigh.
…
Cut to Guillermo in cell later…Looking anxious.
"It wasn't really bad…Just a bit uncomfortable. I mean holding stakes in a bag, wearing a crucifix, carrying holy water…And being ready to kill any other vampires who made trouble. I mean Master Nandor was really being so kind, tryin' to make sure Jen and Eloise were ok. I was just nervous, after…You know. But I had no urge to kill him or Nadja or Laszlo, really." Firm nod.
"It was just…Strange, carrying all that stuff, like a vampire sl…Hunter…Uh, protector of some vampires against really bad vampires." He corrects anxiously.
"Ja, ist vas strange, ja?" he notes.
Blinking in horror at his unconscious Dutch accent and use of a few words…
….
Mist on another large tree branch takes Laszlo's solid form…
"See?" he notes as Nadja takes form beside him.
"Fine. You can do it. Don't do it again." She grouses, peering out. "Can you sense them?"
"I think I can sense Jen, vaguely, to our left, about a quarter mile, I'd say. No one…Ah, I sense Nandor, he's probably the same distance behind them, that way." Laszlo points. "No one and nothing else but some mice, a couple of squirrels…Raccoon…"
"Raccoon?!" Nadja, nervously. "Don't the TV people say they carry rabies?!"
"You're right. I'd better look to it. Mist!" Laszlo dissolves again.
"No, Laszlo! Wait! Oh…Damn!" Nadja sighs. "Wait for me, you moron!" takes mist form and flows down tree.
….
Guillermo leading the way through woods, Nandor close behind…
"Careful, Guillermo…Make sure Miss Jennifer and Miss Eloise know it's you if they sense us. And beware the unholy creatures that may lurk in the shadows here." Nandor intones.
"Yes, Master…Everything seems quiet." Slight apprehension now…
"I was just setting the mood, don't worry. I think it's good. I don't sense anything but Laszlo and Nadja and maybe a vague whiff of Miss Eloise ahead." Smiles to Guillermo's anxious look.
"So…Guillermo…" As they resume their careful march through the dark woods, following the narrow trail to the back cliff grounds of the estate, a mile distant. "I understand from Jennifer and my new minion Susan, you may be having the dating and mating soon?" teasing tone.
"I don't know, Master…" Guillermo, looking ahead, shrugging.
"Guillermo…" shaking head. "This is a good thing. You should be doing this with the ladies at your time of life. And I hear some other ladies are also interested in my familiar…" smile.
"Maybe…Not really, they're just in thrall. I think they just see me as representing you, Master. Did you hear that?" he turns back to regard Nandor, both pausing.
"I think Laszlo materialized badly. That was his groan. It's fine. Now, Guillermo…" paternal tone. "You should not sell yourself shortly, my familiar. You are very sweet boy. Susan says she thinks you are a very good guy, she asked me what I thought of you and I agreed. Very good guy." Kind nod.
"Thank you, Master." They press on.
"Don't worry too much about the enthrallment…If they really disliked you, I or the others'd have to order them to approach you. Susan does like you. As do Phyllis…Though, Phyllis is a bit…Strained in her enthrallment. And she is a bit older for you. Though, if I may say…From my own experience as a husband of 37 wives? Older women can teach you much about life…And love." Fond nod, reflecting…
"I don't know if I'm really ready to…For that…Master."
"Guillermo? When is anyone 'ready'? Was I 'ready' when I married at twenty, after my first great victory for the Sultan, 37 wives? You must really stop fearing life, Guillermo. Enjoy it while you can and let it take you where it will. It's short enough…And then…" He pauses.
"Yes, Master…" Guillermo sighs.
"It shows your good heart that you don't want to take advantage. And don't…That is my order and of course the Lady Nadja would have your head if you hurt any of the ladies, you know?" firm stare.
"I can imagine, Master. We'd better go left here, the trail leads that way." They proceed…
"But…Susan truly likes you and she and Jen say she has had the wisdom to see her past boyfriends in the whole, not just the surface. Though, Guillermo…This is not criticism, you should be as you wish…I always am, myself, of course. But maybe…" hesitant.
"Master?"
"Just perhaps you could try dressing a bit more befitting a Chief Familiar now? Not that you can't go casual when doing your work about the old and new places, but just…You really looked good in your suit in the office the other day. Even Nadja said so." firm nod.
"Thanks. I'm not really able to afford a lot of clothes, Master…"
"Yes." Sigh. "I have been a bit remiss on finances with you. But now you are my Chief Familiar and it is time you were rewarded appropriately. Besides, a young man about the village needs something to squire the ladies about, eh? Eh?" slight poke to Guillermo's ribs as he grimaces. "Colin Robinson has my instruction to see a proper salary is now paid to you, my Chief Familiar. So tomorrow, you go with Jen and Susan and do a little shopping, eh? Clothes may not make the man but a proper outfit never hurts."
"That's…Very kind…Master, thank you." Guillermo, squeaking a bit…
"No problem. But, don't let me influence your choice. Naturally I rather like the idea of my familiars getting together. But, if Phyllis or some other young lady… Or, someone else?" hesitating.
"Else?" Guillermo, pausing in mid-step. "You mean, a guy?" blinking.
"I just want you to know you have my blessing whomsoever you choose. Frankly, we didn't make a big deal of it in my day but there were plenty of gay people about. We practiced don't ask, don't tell, but if caught at the wrong time when the wrong Sultan was on the throne, execute, a lot in my day. It was cool." Friendly pat to arm.
"I'm not gay, Master. If I were, I'd be proud of it…But…"
"I meant no offense, Guillermo… You should be proud if you were. But, if you are not…I wouldn't mind a sort of grandchild gracing the new place." Beam.
Guillermo, eyeing camera…
