Ode to Erik
The Perils Of Dessert
"Oh dear god!
I think I should yell for help. Possibly shout for someone. Maybe even attempt to call an ambulance, or 999 or something! We need some professional help here!
There's an acrid smelling smoke coming from the kitchen, and it's getting worse! God it's choking me!
SOMEONE GET SOME WATER! Why won't they listen to me! The galleries on fire!
Oh lordy! What the devil is happening in there! Oh I wish I could move!
Oh no, what was that noise? A scream!
It sounded high pitched, like a girl. It's not Evey is it? Is she in the kitchen? She could be burning alive and I'm powerless to help……
DAMN THIS USELESS METAL BODY! God I hope she's okay, poor sweet creature.
Hang on…what's tha…what's that sound?
Someone moving about…someone shuffling. They're coming out of the kitchen. I can see a figure! Thank god, I so hope Evey's alright!
--------------------
(15 Minutes Later...)
That god damn idiot. You absolute imbecile.
Oh he makes my blood boil! You wait until our next dual, I'll give him what for!
It serves the utter prat right. He deserves a singed wig, deserves the burnt clothes and scalded fingers. And i hope it bloody hurt as well!
If I ever catch him trying to flambé strawberries again I'm gonna shoot him…"
