Okay people, here's chapter 3. The song is "Someday" by Nickleback.


The cold wind was blowing in strongly off the ocean but Rodney didn't really notice it too much. His hands were numb but he continued holding on to the railing like a drowning man who refused to give up his last lifeline to the world.The salty air stung his face and eyes but he refused to look away or go back inside. He would never admit to anyone, least of all himself, how much John Sheppard's comment and the rejoicing of his colleagues had stung him.

Bowing his head so the top would take the brunt of the elements, he cast his eyes down at the churning waters that so perfectly reflected his insides right now. Maybe Carson was right about him. Maybe the problem wasn't everyone else like he'd been telling himself for years. Maybe the problem really lay with him after all...

Angrily rubbing the tears from his eyes, Rodney straightened up to his full height and blinked a few times, trying desperately to get a rein on himself. He heard the door open from behind him and whirled around to find John Sheppard standing behind him, a usual smirk on the Major's face.

"Hey Rodney, doing anything interesting?" Sheppard asked jovially.

He shrugged. "We're working on a Zed PM regenerator...if one burns out, we might be able to fix it."

"Wow! So no happy dance down the hallway?" he teased.

Rodney pegged him with angry glare that was full of hurt. "No...I don't want to be a Mini McKay." he spat bitterly. Turning on his heel, he walked away. Sheppard closed his eyes and sighed heavily. He'd never intended for McKay to hear that and everyone joked that the scientist didn't have any feelings. It was obvious to John that he did and they had been badly hurt.

He watched McKay walk over to the end of the balcony and tightly grip the railing. The man's hands and arms looked extremely cold and John decided to do the one decent thing he could do. Hurrying over as silently as he could, he was shocked to see couple of tears slowly working their way down Rodney's face. Standing there, Sheppard felt a sense of helplessness and didn't quite know what to do. He cleared his throat a couple of times and the astrophysicist ducked his head in embarrassment so John would not see him crying, even a little. This only tore at the Major even more. Clumsily patting McKay on the shoulder a couple of times, he said softly, "I'm sorry Rodney." before heading back inside, leaving an extremely confused McKay to sort out what had just happened.


Elizabeth finally raised her head and looked up at Carson. "You REALLY know when to do things, don't you?" she asked, a hint of sarcasm in her voice. The expression on the Scotsman's face however made her feel like a dog for saying it. He looked absolutely miserable and Weir took pity on him. "Okay Carson, let's see if we can't do something to make it up to him somehow..." she told the doctor soothingly.

His face immediately lit up. "I know! We can throw him a surprise party!" he cried gleefully. As he began to plan, Elizabeth rubbed her temples and wondered just what she was allowing herself to get dragged into now...

As she began to take part in the planning, Major Sheppard came bursting into her office. "Hi...I did something kinda stupid..." he began. "Take a number." she replied, rolling her eyes.

While John looked puzzled at this, Carson bestowed her with a mini glare that she returned. He averted his eyes and she smiled in triumph. Ha! Take that, you silly man! she thought.

Turning her attention back to Sheppard, she said wearily, "What is it, John?"

He plopped himself down in the chair and bit his lip nervously. "Well...you know how McKay likes to brag, right?"

"Yes..." she answered slowly, wondering where this story was going.

"Anyway, a few months ago, I joked to somebody doing that that they should stop bragging or they'd be a "McKay". It kinda spread from there and I guess that he was out walking around or something and he heard me say it to a couple of the SFs." he said in a rush.

Elizabeth bestowed him with a FIERCE glare and Sheppard literally cowered under it. If they could have harnessed her, the Wraith would have been wiped out completely!

"Where is he right now?" she asked sweetly and John winced. Whenever she used that sweet tone, it meant that she was trying to keep herself from annihilating someone where they sat.

"He's outside on the balcony. I...apologized." he mumbled, looking down at the ground.

"Well Sheppard, there may be some hope for you after all...now you get to help Carson plan Rodney's surprise birthday party."

The Major looked shocked. "Today's his birthday?" he asked incredulously.

"Not just any birthday. His 40th." Carson supplied.

Sheppard winced. "We have GOT to get better timing..." he muttered.


Finally getting too cold to stay out on the balcony, Rodney came back inside and walked straight to his quarters. He was lost in his own world and didn't see the concerned expressions of the people who watched him pass. As he entered his room, he heaved a sigh of relief. He was back in his safe haven again.

Walking over to the corner that had his cd player in it, he popped in some fresh batteries and flicked it on. Rooting around in his burned cds that he'd made before he left Earth, he put one in. Contrary to popular belief, he enjoyed all kinds of music, not just classical. People assumed that was all he listened to but Rodney had fairly far reaching horizons on the music front.

Cranking the volume, he laid back on his bed and closed his eyes as the sounds of Yellowcard filled the room. Several people passing by stopped in their tracks and wondered if some kind of alien influence had possessed Dr. McKay. Teyla heard the music coming from his room and recognized it as something Sheppard had played for her long ago. She paused to listen, her eyebrows going up when she realized that it was Rodney McKay playing this song.

As his cd played on, Rodney mulled over Carson's words. He knew the doctor well enough to know that he wouldn't have said something unless he felt that he aboslutely needed to. Old memories came flooding back to him and he remembered his 14th birthday when his father had finally had enough and left. The current song playing was by his favorite Canadian band Nickleback and it certainly fit...


14 year old Rodney McKay sat in his room, staring at the Star Wars poster he had on the back of his bedroom door. He could hear his mother and father fighting again as usual in the kitchen. A soft purring from his right side momentarily distracted him and he allowed himself a small smile as his cat Albert crawled into his lap. Cuddling the cat close to him, he listened impassively as the sounds of plates breaking drifted up to him. It was going to be a bad fight.

Setting Albert down gently on his bed, Rodney got to his feet and walked over to the door just as footsteps came thudding up the staircase. Curious as to what was going on, he poked his head out the door in time to see his father go stomping into the master bedroom. A cold feeling swept over Rodney and against his better judgement, he cautiously went in to find his father tossing things into a suitcase.

"Dad...what are you doing?" he asked. His father looked up and amidst the anger on his face, there was compassion in his eyes. "I'm sorry son, but I can't do this anymore."

The teen stood there, frozen to his spot. "Rodney..." his father said quietly, placing a hand on his shoulder. That broke the spell and Rodney spun out of his grasp. "Leave me alone!" the young man howled before running into his room and slamming the door. Albert meowed in surprise as Rodney flopped face down on his bed but moved over to make room for his distressed owner.

A few moments later, the door opened and Cedric McKay walked in slowly. "Rodney..." he called. "Go away." came the muffled reply.

"Rodney, I'm not leaving because of you." Cedric told him gently.

"Then why are you leaving me?" Rodney demanded, sitting up and glaring at his father. Cedric put an arm around his son who stiffened for a moment, then allowed his father to pull him into an embrace.

"I'm leaving because your mother and I are just too different to live together anymore, Rodney. It was nothing that you did personally...you have to believe me on that, son. I've never been anything but proud of you. I'm going to get settled, then I'll call you and let you know where I am, okay?"

"Okay..." Rodney replied sullenly.

Cedric smiled sadly down at his son. "You'll understand one day, Rodney."

"Yeah, right." the boy muttered. His father hugged him closely and Rodney clung to him. "Please don't leave me Dad!" he begged. "I have to..." Cedric whispered.

Once his father had gotten his suitcase into the car, Rodney raced up the stairs to his room and watched the car as it travelled along the dusty driveway and he wondered if he was going to ever understand this someday...

Coming out of his reverie, Rodney closed his eyes as the final lines of the song played.

Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Let's rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a hollywood horror

Nothing's wrong
just as long as
you know that someday I will

Someday, somehow
gonna make it allright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
Someday, somehow
gonna make it allright but not right now
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
I know you're wondering when
(You're the only one who knows that)
I know you're wondering when

His someday had never come...


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