What We Do In The Shadows: "Jen..."

Summary: There are unexpected consequences when Laszlo seeks a new human familiar...

Part LXXXI...

Hotel Gran Ciudal de Mexico…

Phyllis and Susan in hallway, both in their suits from the funeral, Phyllis a bit apprehensive…

"Sue? Should we be doing this?"

"You wanted to come…" Susan, shrugs

"Yeah…I just…"

"Did he do something to you?" Susan eyes her colleague/fellow minion-enthrallee/rival.

"Gui?" stare.

"Not Gui, Dracula…"

"What? Whadya mean? When?"

"When he took you for a walk at the funeral. You've been spacey ever since."

"What? No… I mean…No…" Phyllis insists. "I'm not…You know…His girl."

"I know the Overlords said Simon Devious couldn't control us thanks to their hold but…" Susan shrugs. "He is Dracula."

"No…He just…We just talked, about things…Gui's aunt and all…"

"Well, you sure got a lot calmer afterwards…Maybe you're not controlled but he did something."

Phyllis, worried now…

"It's ok. I'm sure you wouldn't do anything to hurt Gui or our Lady and Lords." Susan notes. "Though…I guess I should be careful with you."

"I'm not doing this for him. I swear, Sue. I'm Mistress Nadja's…Always. And I'm loyal to Gui and the others, honest." Anxious stare. "You know I love Gui, Sue." Shrug. "Even if I get it that he prefers you. And I love the other Overlords nearly as much as my Lady Nadja."

"I'm sure I am…Still hers." she notes, a bit wanly.

"I'm sure you are, Phyl." Susan, sympathetically. "But you understand? This is Gui's and their lives on the line. I'm not sayin' this out of jealousy, I hafta be sure you're not doing anything for Dracula."

"Ok…" sigh. "If you gotta kill me…" resigned tone. "Tell Gui I loved him…"

Susan, staring… "Phyl?! No…Geesh, I just mean I gotta be cautious around you. Till I'm sure you're not hypnotized or something. I just want you to let me handle things with Dr. A."

"Oh…" nod. "Well, ok…Sure. But you know, Sue, if you ever were sure I'd betray the guys or Gui, I'd want you to kill me, no shit." Earnest nod.

"Yeah, well, not right now." Susan puts up a hand. "And I may need you. But I just want you to hang back while I…"

"Ladies?" Cicely Afanas had emerged from Dr. Acura's hotel room… "I thought you were staying with Guillermo and his family at the ranch?"

"We are, Mrs. Afanas." Susan nods…Eyeing her pleasant face… "Just had to check out and bring our stuff." Indicates bag by her side.

She sure don't look 99. More like early 50s if even that.

Say…? Does she look younger? She does, a bit…Hmmn…

You don't suppose Drac is supplying a bit more of what her hubbie gave her?

"Are you staying with the doc?" Phyllis asks, puzzled.

"Not…Exactly…" Cicely smiles. "We're old friends and just exchanging a few personal memories."

Oh? Susan stares.

But wait, isn't he all "redemption for my one true"?

Don't tell me he's seeing her on the side?

Of course, to be fair…Eternity is a long time…And maybe the Dracs have an open marriage while she's incorporeal.

"You came to see Philippe…" Cicely eyes her.

"I need to speak to him, if he's free."

"Oh, yes. He is…" smile. "Well, no time like the present, dear." Indicating the door. "Come and see me before you head back to the ranch, if you have time, both of you. We'll have a nightcap together." She heads for elevator.

"Yeah, thanks." Susan nods. "Yeah." Phyllis echoes.

"You think she and he…?" Phyllis eyes her as the elevator door closes on Mrs. Afanas.

Susan shrugs. "Who knows. Phyl? Why don't you go downstairs and check in with me in ten?"

"You sure?" Phyllis eyes her. "I mean, I'm ok, you can count on me. But I hate to leave you alone, if you think…"

"He's not into harming people any more…" Susan shakes head. "Just check to be sure everything's ok in ten, all right?"

"Sure. If you like. Maybe I should wait up here?"

"No, I'd prefer doing this alone. It's ok, Phyl. And safer to have one of us checking on the other, right?"

"All right…I'll check on you in ten. Uh…"

"Just call my cell. That'll be fine."

"Right." Phyllis boards a newly arrived elevator. "Be careful…And I know you're doing this for Gui. He would be grateful if he knew…" slight woebegone look.

"I hope so…" Susan, a bit arch. Then warm smile… "And thanks, Phyl…"

"Eh, haven't given up completely, you know me." As door closes.

Susan turning and moving to Dr. Acura's door… Knocking gently…

Devious Productions van…Just leaving the grounds of the Old Residence…

Simon in back, well protected by a solid panel with small window of the special-tech uv blocking glass, blocking off the front where a human minion drives, though it is after sunset…

"Samarta, hold that camera steady! Ok, action… Hello, again friends of all persuasions, excepting of course…Gypsies." Grimace. "I, the Devious, have concluded a treaty of alliance with my old friends the Cravenworths, Nandor the Relentless, and their associated human minions to oppose the evil machinations of Van Helsing, his traitorous sidekick Dracula, and his ruthless Vampiral Hunter Corps, to selflessly save them from eternal redemption and boring existence as redeemed types either here or in that human cesspool of bliss, Heaven." Beam.

"Could I have a more noble purpose…? From the vampiral pov, at least. I think not." proud nod. "And for the human side, though not intentionally for their benefit, I have my allies blessing to continue with my plans to destroy the Vampiric Council… "Not really caring, old boy. Though we'd prefer not to be staked or fried by them, in violation of their own laws." As Laszlo put it.

"Of course, true, I am getting something out of this…The destruction of a bunch of chumps blocking my way to glory, the total dominion of American and then Earthly vampirity!" awed tones, outstretched hands. Samarta trying to avoid rolling eyes…

Our lil' Hitler…

"Protection, via my dear Lesley Ciara, from the Vampire Hunters…A little deal between them and me to protect their people and my Lesley in exchange for their people being declared off limits. So long as they avoid me and my own people and we, them and keep our human kills beneath notice. Fair is fair, after all."

"Of course, Laszlo, in addition to rudely refusing to turn over his hat which I know Nadja couldn't have destroyed so easily…!" fume… "Was all… 'If they're after us, for what their lot take as noble reasons…Please…Why should they stop at your behest even if one of their own supports you?'…Well, good question, I suppose. But as I explained, it's mainly my deal with them to protect me…Their safety comes second, which rather impressed the others as honest. But given I have no intention of seeing them achieve redemption, that secondary route is simple. I keep them informed of the Hunters' moves as much as my people and Lesley can tell, they agree not to kill captured Hunters but merely use them strategically as hostages. Humans are so attached to comrades they know well or even just work with, so there's a good chance that strategy will impress them and cause them to relent. Win-win-win for all, I say. Brave human types…Hey, I can see both sides, I'm a big picture guy…Get to avoid needless death. My allies keep the existence they clearly want…I get to see them condemned like me, forever. Van Helsing sees his descendant and his followers live. Though as for Dracula…Well, if he decides to pursue his quest against my allies, it's his choice and he must take what comes. He, and his daughter."

He eyes Samarta… "Come on, girl, ask the question! I thought you used to be a reporter! Senility creeping back in?!"

"Sorry. I wasn't sure if you were ready…" she notes, pausing camera. "Ok, ready."

Simon taking pose…Urbanely ready to receive a question…

" 'So…Mr. Devious, may this documentarian ask if you intend to or even believe you or your allies can, kill the great Dracula?'" she asks, reading from his script.

"What? That crew of idiots?" he gives sniff.

Rappula, Todd from their seats eyeing him…

"Oh, no…I have no expectation they will have a chance of killing Dracula…But therein lies the beauty of my scheme. The dear near human wuss has a family now, again…An adopted daughter, the apple of his eye by all accounts…His worthless sister, the once great Countess Elisabeth…Friends among the little humans, not to mention his great pal, Van Helsing. Meaning he will even risk failure in this little quest to protect his new family if he finds them endangered. Or even…" smile, draw of line across throat.

"Send my allies to Hades, sans physical form, sans redemption, sans everything."

"Best of all, he might even jeopardize his own redemption…Oh, I am so on a roll here with my plans."

Ummn…Samarta unable to repress reporter's instinct, pausing camera…

"What?!" he glares.

"Well, Boss…How could he…Dracula…Risk his own redemption? I mean he's just killing our kind here…Protecting his friends and family…I mean…" she puts up a hand. "I get he might screw the redemption of your quote allies unquote, but that shouldn't…"

"It's unlikely. But suppose, to protect his daughter or others, he were to take human life? Namely his best friend's descendant…" shrewd look.

Well, so much for Romance…Samarta eyes him.

"Lesley? You'd let him kill her?"

"Hopefully it won't come to that…Or I can turn her before it does, but why not?" Simon shrugs. "And sure, it may not recondemn him, given she's opposing them…And threatening his daughter…But it's sure to hurt and trouble the traitor. Certainly impose an awkwardness between him and his old pal…Even if ole Abe understands the cruel necessity…" somewhat insistent shrug…This is a grand plan.

So…Our main plan is to impose an awkwardness between Van Helsing's ghost and Dracula? Make Dracula feel a bit guilty for killing someone human who betrayed her own and threatened his adopted kid?

Great…

"Well, that's just the icing on the cake of condemning the Cravensworths and Nandor…And destroying the Council…" Simon, sensing doubt. "It's just a nice addendum…Besides, if the daughter gets condemned herself in the heat of battle…"

Bummer for a human…I remember vaguely my dad was pretty upset after I got turned wandering about captured Rome. Lots of famine and plague spelled clustering vamps…Guess I picked the wrong time to go tourist in the Imperial City, from that pov, Samarta thinks.

"…By one of our allies…" Simon, broad smile.

That would certainly chill Dracula's enthusiasm for redeeming the others, Samarta nods.

But what kind of guy would take his young, non-warrior band leader to such an event?

"Is this Ms. Dracula a Hunter?" Rappula, seated just ahead of Simon, annoying Samarta by beating her question.

Wait a minute, am I? Rappula looking back at Simon and Samarta, she likewise in front of Simon in her seat. Yes, the fuck I am…I'm a vampiric shield for this clown, he eyes the panel before him.

Just figured out why he gives us seats upfront of him? Well, so I am, fool, Samarta eyes Rappula in turn…

Well, well…Todd, eyeing both, pleased to have the side seat.

Oh, damn…Right, I'm the shield for an attack on the side door…

"She is…It's so grand to have someone like Lesley, with connections, in a rival organization." Simon beams.

"Dracula lets his own living daughter fight us?" Samarta stares.

"Don't let the camera waver!" Simon cries. "I'll look ridiculous."

Well, given you already look like a fleabag version of Liberace…Samarta thinks.

"Sorry, Boss. But would he really…?"

Of course my dad let me take the field at twelve and I wasn't adopted, but…

"She's still training, according to Lesley…Under careful protection as you know…"

You bet we do…Rappula frowns at the memory of several ill-fated efforts against the Acura home. That bitch Elisabeth still packs quite a punch over and above the Hunters who patrol.

Still, respect…Drac treasures his little black daughter.

"But she is to be involved in the final effort against our friends. Lesley assures me of it. She is essential, somehow." Shrugging at various stares.

"Maybe they think Nandor or Nadja would be taken with the idea of being able to adopt a daughter…" Simon shrugs again. "Push them over that Redemptive cliff."

"This seems awful risky to me." Rappula, firmly. "We're puttin' a lot of trust in a human whom we know is a Hunter and even if she's your girl for sure…" raising hand at Simon's glare. "If Dracula ever learns we're involved and his girl gets hurt…"

"Guys. That is the beauty of my plan. We don't get involved. We leave everything to Nandor and the Cravenwoods. We just stroll in to pick up the pieces and eat the surviving minions. But no Hunters!" firm look. "I promised Lesley and I intend to stand by my promise."

"All this just to keep a few rogue types from Redemption…" Rappula shakes head. "I never liked this one and I like it less the more I hear about it."

"And to destroy the Vampiric Council and make us all vampiric lords of America. No longer just the Tri-State area. And with the European Council in chaos after Afanas' so fortunate departure from this world…" Simon beams. "My…Our…Road to Global Dominion is clear…"

Rappula frowning… "We'll still have the Hunters…Dracula…Maybe a really mad Dracula…The Slayer, who or wherever she is…All ready to put an end to that one, especially after we've helped take out so many of our kind."

"Rap…? You can't be saying you're out?" Simon, solemnly sad look.

"Don't pull that shit and try to kill me just yet, Devious…" Rappula eyes him. "I didn't say I was out, just that I don't like it as it stands."

"Oh?" a miffed Simon eyeing him. "You want to put an oar in? Tinker with my scheme?"

"I want the three things you promised, D." firm return stare. "My homeland turf as Vampiric Lord…My seat as an equal on your new Council…I take care of Ms. Dracula."

"Fine. The Old Roman Empire is all yours, Rhine to the Sahara, if you can best what's left of the European Council. You get your seat. And, say what?" Simon blinks.

Samarta and Todd, who'd been quietly evaluating options, in their seats, blinking…

"I'll take care of her…You want Drac upset and the Cravenworths and Nandor blamed? Leave her to me when the time comes."

"Well…You're sure?" Simon stares.

I mean I was hoping for a fall guy to throw to Dracula but…

"Dracula will kill you if you even pass near her during the fight, even if he knows we're not getting involved." Samarta stares.

"I'll take my chances…And none of you will get blamed. All right, D?"

"As you wish, Rap." Simon shrugs.

Oh…That's gotta be it.

"You aren't seriously thinking of taking her for your new mate?" Simon stares. "I mean we all mourn Carol but…"