February 3rd, 2005
Week 11 of pregnancy
Okay so the two weeks off hadn't been as bad as Ray had thought they would be. He was able to do a lot with Goatsucker. It was nice to be on stage more. He was able to write two brand new songs that the guys just loved.
What was also great in these past two weeks was that Abby's morning sickness had halted. He was happy to see her able to eat more food (and see her gain some extra pounds as her waist line started to expand). He was able to spend time with Abby and that meant more to him than Goatsucker.
"Can we pick out baby names?" Ray asked as he washed Abby's dishes. Abby began to laugh. She shook her head.
"It's too early." She told him, "We have like eight weeks before we find the sex out."
"I know, but I don't know your naming style." Ray glanced at her, "Do you like Trendy names or old fashion names?" Abby thought about it for a moment. She never really had thought about names before. She had names she liked that she had heard on patients.
"I suppose somewhere in between." She said.
"Me too." Ray said putting the plate into the drainer. "Short and sweet."
"Yeah like Jack or Eve….but not those." Abby smirked.
"They're nice." Ray said, "Well, that'll give me some idea and when we find the sex out I'll be ready." Abby chuckled. Ray was such a nut sometimes, but she nodded.
"I'll be ready too." She said. It was going to be amazing when they found the sex out. She had been with many couples on that day. She had seen the looks upon their faces. They looked like they were in heaven. Abby wanted to feel that. Soon, she would. She never thought she would get here, but now that she was, Abby was so damn excited to experience all the fun in pregnancy…It was what happened after the pregnancy she wasn't too sure about.
"So, are we doing anything for Valentine's Day?" Ray asked. Abby shook her head.
"I don't' celebrate it." She told him. Ray frowned deeply as he looked at her. He shut the water off.
"What do you mean you don't celebrate it?" He asked.
"It's just a stupid holiday created by the card companies." She explained to him, "Therefore I do not celebrate it."
"I guess I'll return the tennis bracelet I got for you." Ray said. Abby rolled her eyes.
"You didn't get me one." She said.
"Not now. I'll have to return it." Ray said.
"You're so full of it." Abby chuckled as she stood up, "You couldn't afford one. You're not getting me."
"Then I'll take back the diamond tiara." Ray said. Abby laughed.
"Can't you just see me in a tiara?" She asked, "My name is Abby. I'm an alcoholic and a princess." Ray laughed walking over to her.
"You'd look sexy in one." He said. Abby pushed him away.
"I need to get going." She said grabbing her jacket, "Will you be here when I get back?" Ray nodded. She smiled. She loved coming home and seeing Ray there.
Abby sat in the hard folding chair staring at the group mediator. Sometimes she found these meetings very boring, but she had to come. There was no way around it if she wanted herself to be healthy.
"Abby?" The mediator asked. Abby looked up from her daydream, "We haven't heard from you in a few weeks and we have some new members. Why don't you reintroduce yourself to us."
"Um…Okay." Abby stood up. "My name is Abby and I'm an alcoholic. It's been eight months since my last sip of alcohol. This one was my third slip, but I can't afford to have another slip. I'm pregnant now and There's more than myself to think about now. I've worked on the maternity ward so I've seen what alcohol does to babies. I think that's been the biggest reality check I've ever had."
"How far along are you, Abby?" Thomas asked.
"About eleven weeks. I didn't want this baby at first, but now I do. I want it to be as healthy as possible. If I have another slip up, my child could suffer." Abby said.
"It's great that you acknowledge that." The mediator said, "But you need to remember, a slip up in the next eighteen plus years will still effect your child. I know there are a lot of people here who can say that it had affected their children." A few people nodded as Abby sat back down.
"You don't realize it at the time of course." Emily said, "My daughter Michaela was three years old when I drank two bottles of jack Daniels and passed out for two days. Her father was away on business so Michaela had to take care of herself. Obviously she couldn't. That was one of the biggest things I regret with my sickness."
"Or how about driving." Connor looked at Abby, "We all know drinking and driving is wrong, but I was drunk when I picked my three kids up from school. Jessica didn't want to get in the car with me. I made her though I drove ten miles, drunk, with my three babies in the car. Nothing happened, but All four of us could have been killed."
"I don't think I would do that." Abby said.
"I didn't think I could either." Connor said to her, "The disease knew other wise. It wants you to fail. It wants to over take your life. All of us here have experienced that and our families have experienced it. This baby still doesn't know what alcohol will do to it's mother. You have a chance to show this child the joys of life without alcohol."
"I know." Abby sighed deeply, "My boyfriend stopped drinking. He doesn't have a problem, but he stopped for me."
"That's wonderful." Emily said. "It is great to have all the support you can get."
"I want to give you your year chip, Abby. I've been close on several occasions. I hope I can give you one." The mediator said. Abby nodded.
"I promise you can." She said.
"Promises from alcoholics are like sex from nuns. They don't happen." The mediator said, "Prove me wrong, Abby."
"I will." She said. God, this was going to follow her her entire life. She knew it would.
"Does anyone have any comments before we go?" The mediator asked. No one spoke up. Thank god, Abby thought. She wanted to go home. "All right. I'll see you next week." Abby grabbed her purse. There was always a mad rush for the door. Emily grabbed Abby's hand.
"How are you doing?" Emily asked, "You know with the pregnancy."
"Just fine thank you." Abby smiled pleasantly, "It was a shock of course. You know my history. I didn't want to bring a child into this world like this, but my boyfriend. He's really great. He supports me in everything I do." Emily smiled gently.
"That's wonderful." She told her, "That's one thing I didn't have. Carl never helped. He was always on business. What does your boyfriend do?"
"He's a doctor and a musician." Abby said, "So, he's busy a lot but so am I."
"Aren't we all?" Emily laughed, "Listen, if you ever need anything even if it's a shoulder to cry on or an alcoholic to alcoholic conversation, You have my number."
"Thank you , Emily." Abby said, "I really appreciate it."
"And if you have a girl, I have a lot of things from when Michaela was little still. You're free to take them." She said.
"I might take you up on that offer." Abby laughed as she headed out the door. Baby things were expensive and she had a limited budget for right now. Richard was going to love this. Hey, he had a kid now why couldn't Abby?
"Is there anything else you need, Abby?" Emily asked.
"I don't know as of yet." She said, "I may need a babysitter someday."
"I'll take you up on that offer." Emily said giving her a tiny wave. "I'll see you later."
"Bye." Abby gave a wave as she got into her car. She pulled her cell phone out as she started the vehicle up. Okay, she knew she shouldn't be driving while on the cell phone, but she had to multitask. She dialed her mother's number.
"Hello?" Maggie asked.
"Mom, it's me." Abby said.
"Who's me?" Maggie smiled.
"Very funny." Abby said, "I really need to talk to you."
"Oh…" Maggie wasn't used to that. Abby usually kept to herself. Maybe this was her chance to restart their relationship, "Well, I'm here with open ears so fire away."
"Well…" Abby took in a very deep breath. She could do this. "You're going to be a grandmother." Maggie went silence. She could literally hear the wheels in Maggie's head turn. "Ma?"
"Wait….Are you telling me that you're pregnant?" Maggie asked. Abby chuckled as she pulled up to the red light.
"Yup. Ray and I are expecting a baby in August." Abby said.
"Oh. My. God." Maggie started to hyperventilate, "I'm going to have a grandbaby!"
"Yeah. I'm eleven weeks along." Abby said.
"Oh Abby, you've made me the happiest I've been in a very long time." Maggie said, "I knew this would happen for you someday. I need to meet this Ray guy or at least talk with him."
"You will I promise." Abby said, "Listen, I'm driving so I need to get off the phone. I thought you should know. Tell Eric."
"Oh I will, Sweetheart." Maggie said. Abby could hear the joy in her voice. "I love you Abby." Abby took in a deep breath. This was her chance to start everything over again. New man, new baby, new everything.
"I love you too, Mom." Abby said, "Bye." She hung up the phone and smiled. That had been short but sweet…That was how Abby liked her conversations with her mother. Now she told her mother. Next on the list was Ray's mother. She knew nothing about her, but she knew she deserved to know.
