CHAPTER 6: Ginny's Suspicions
Hermione didn't sleep much that night. She stayed up, and after writing her letter to Voldemort as promised, thought about her and Malfoy's (Draco's?) almost-kiss. It scared her how much she yearned for his secure touch, for the feel of his pale gray eyes on her. Oh, his eyes were so beautiful! They were like frosted silver, but with flecks of black and summer-sky blue in them.
She shivered at the lust and depth of feeling in his eyes when he had looked at her. They had been through a lot together in such a short time, and a lovely friendship was blooming between the two of them. She wasn't going to let this get in the way of it, she decided firmly. That was it, she would just act as if nothing had happened.
But even after reaching this decision, she lay awake until a fitful sleep overtook her at close to 5 AM.
Someone giggled. Groaning, Hermione looked over at the clock. It wasn't even 8:30 yet. Groaning again, she pulled her pillow over her head. She was not going to go through the day on just over three hours of sleep. But there was another giggle, barely suppressed this time, and then two people started laughing uproariously. Hermione swore under her breath. "Some people," she snarled, throwing the pillow to the foot of her bed, "are still trying to sleep." She looked into the guilty faces of Lavender and Parvati, who then began to laugh even more.
Hermione stood and gathered up her clothing, dressing as quickly as she could before storming out of the room, grumbling. She didn't have her wand or she would have just put a silencing charm around her bed like she always did when they began to giggle at absurd times of the morning (or night).
She growled grumpily and glared at anyone she passed in the halls. But she knew there would be no getting back to sleep now (perhaps that was why she was in such a horrid mood in the first place), and was resigned to the fact. Having no set direction, she merely wandered the halls tetchily before deciding some fresh air would do her good.
Hermione settled herself on the edge of the lake, tossing pebbles into the dark depths. The squid put up a tentacle in protest, and the sixth year desisted, settling to think some more. Her brain felt like it was being overworked by this whole…thing, but she couldn't stop thinking about it. His pale arms had been so beautiful as they had boxed her in at the side of the pool, but she hadn't felt trapped. Indeed, she had felt…protected.
She sighed, looking up at the sky. His eyes were such a lovely gray, as she thought about it, she imagined that was all she could see, her vision was a fog of gray flecked with black…a lazy grin spread across her face. "Are you going to get that?" a familiar drawl said. Startled, she blinked; realizing the gray in front of her eyes was not her imagination, but an owl's wing. She sat up and untied the letter.
I'm afraid I cannot possibly do that. I can only risk it when we truly need it. Sorry, daughter, but you're on your own.
Your Father
Hermione groaned. "He can't get us a portkey," she told Malfoy miserably. The boy sneered slightly.
"Then I'm going to go get my broom. I've got a long ride ahead of me," he said, sauntering off while still muttering under his breath. His sudden absence, and the fact that it seemed he was not taking her with him hit her heart like a sledgehammer. She wanted to pretend like last night hadn't happened, but it didn't seem like that was an option. She picked herself up and stumbled back into the castle, refusing to admit how much it hurt that he wasn't taking her with him, much as she detested flying.
So, she would go, find a nice big book, settle down in a comfortable chair in the common room…she paused. That wouldn't work, not with Harry and Ron there. They hadn't talked to her at all yesterday after the morning, even when they were in the common room with her. In fact, they'd just sent annoyed glances at her all night until she'd gone to bed.
Okay, so, off to the library. Or to her dormitory. But no, that wouldn't work either, as Ginny may come in and hound her again. Hermione sighed in frustration as she turned to go to the library, knowing that even then they could find her there. Then a thought struck her. She could…follow Draco to the Slytherin common rooms and corner him and make them discuss what had happened.
But she didn't really want to talk about what had happened.
She could convince him to let her go with him though. It was her wand, anyway.
Smirking fit to match the boy in her thoughts, she rushed up the stairs to get her cloak so the rest of the Slytherins wouldn't recognize her. It was risky business, and she actually was getting a little thrill from knowing the threat of getting caught. Before she knew it, she was in her shared room, and she was digging through her trunk for her cloak, the one that was too big (she wanted to be sure she was properly covered up).
Hermione slung her book bag over her shoulder. It was packed with several books and her too-large cloak. To anyone looking at her, she'd merely be going to the library. But most of the students were trying to enjoy the last few nice days before winter out by the lake, so it was there that she had to worry more. It was just a little past one by now. She should be able to catch Malfoy long before he left—he couldn't possibly be leaving this early.
She walked into the library, making an obvious entrance by stumbling over a chair. Looking embarrassed (though she really wasn't, it had been part of her plan), she meekly meandered to the back corner of the library. Now was the hard part: getting out without anyone noticing. Now if anyone asked Harry and Ron where Hermione had been today, there would be people who saw her go into the library. She wanted to use this excuse as long as she could, which meant she couldn't just walk out. She had to sneak.
Stashing her book bag behind a chair, she pulled out her cloak. She couldn't wear it yet (that would look horrendously suspicious in early October, especially since she was indoors), but she couldn't leave it behind. Slowly, and using the bookshelves for cover, she made her way to the front of the library. It took a while, but she was finally sure no one was looking, and she slunk over to the doorway. She listened for feet passing in the hall, and when she heard the last footsteps receding, she crawled out of the library as fast as she could, fairly sure no one had seen her exit.
Grinning hugely, she scurried over to a mostly unused passage to her left. It wasn't usually used because it had a ton disappearing steps and was only there on even days of the year, but it went straight to the ground floor. It had taken Hermione nearly two weeks to get it memorized going up and going down, but she figured it was worth it, being much faster in the long run. She scampered down these, careful of the steps and reaching back in her memory for the pattern to go down.
The Entrance Hall was the worst. People almost never stopped moving. She got close to halfway across it before she had to throw herself behind a statue of Winelda the Wacky as Snape and another person walked across the hall, deep in conversation. Because their backs were turned to her, she took the chance and dashed the rest of the way across.
The dungeons. Hermione extracted the memory of the trail from her memory as she fastened her cloak. With the hood pulled up, the dungeons looked positively scary, as the already-dim light dimmed even more. With a shudder, she followed the mental map.
"Dragonflame," she muttered. The wall before her opened up. She tugged the cloak about her tighter and walked in. The common room was crowded, but she walked like she meant business and didn't even deign to look at them. Let them think she was a high and mighty Slytherin—only then would they not question her.
She breathed a sigh of relief as she gained the stairs. Without even knocking, she walked into the dormitory. Draco was there, giving instruction to Crabbe and Goyle. Hermione hovered at the entrance uncertainly, but held her head high as if worthy of being their equal. Making up her mind, she drifted over to where the boys were talking. Finally, Malfoy looked up at her and his eyes grew wide. He broke off his speech to the larger boys, and they looked up at her as well.
"I'm coming with you," she blurted out, and winced at how high her voice was. Malfoy seemed to notice the same thing and smirked.
"Oh really?" he said menacingly. Noting his tone, Crabbe and Goyle stood to flank him.
"What?" she said nastily, realizing pleading would not get her anywhere with the other two there. Maybe if they were alone she could, but not with them here; she would need to bully him into this. "Are you going to set your hounds on an unarmed girl? Will you really stoop that low? All I'm saying is that I'm coming, and that's what I'm going to do no matter what you say." She gave him a haughty look, daring him to challenge her.
"Why you little—"
Before he could finish, Hermione gave a small gasp to get his attention before she gave him an admonishing look before clucking disapprovingly. "I'm sorry, what am I to tell Daddy I am? You know you'll get in trouble for that, if I tell him that you hurt me." Malfoy's jaw dropped and she let her chin wobble slightly and her eyes grow large and sad as if she was about to cry, letting her hood fall back a little so he could see her face.
Draco looked away, as if unwilling to accept defeat. She quickly made minor changes to her face and switched her look to pleading puppy eyes, an expression she didn't use much. When he cast a wary glance her way, he saw the look and she knew she'd won, though she was careful not to show the victory on her face for fear he may reconsider.
"Fine, you can come," he said. "But we need to leave soon, or we'll never get there and back by morning. And this will be an all night thing, we won't have time for sleep," he said. "You still up for it?" he asked.
"Yes," she nodded excitedly, and the hood slipped a little more. She replaced it instantly, but knew by the look in his eyes that Goyle had seen and was trying to place her.
"Hey," Goyle said, "She looks a lot like—"
Malfoy whipped out his wand and erased Goyle's memory before he could finish the sentence, then cleared Crabbe's mind as well. "Sorry," Hermione murmured.
Draco looked back at her and gave her a rare grin. "Don't worry about it." But then he seemed to realize how warm his look was and it was as if shutters closed over his face as his expression became cold and ruthless. He grabbed his broom from under his bed then grabbed her wrist painfully on the way out, "Let's go."
Hermione did not speak as they passed through the common room, though managed to make herself look dignified and as if she wasn't being dragged out of there. She didn't realize that it must have looked (to most in the common room) like they were holding hands, but even if she had she wouldn't have cared. Malfoy needed some sort of trouble for the annoyance he was causing her.
"Do you have to be such an obnoxious prat?" she asked him as soon as the wall had closed behind them. She hadn't meant to burst out now, but now that she was started she may as well finish. "You could have just let everything be! You could've just pretended it hadn't happened like I was going to do! But, no. You had to go and get all cold on me. Well, I'm not having it! You are going to act normal, we're going to be secret friends, and we are not going to kiss!" she yelled.
"Do be quiet," Malfoy said, leading her down the hall. Hermione growled deep in her throat and took a breath to continue talking. "If you don't shut your mouth this instant, I'm not taking you no matter what you say," he threatened. She closed her jaws with an audible snap. His grip on her wrist loosened though he did not let go until they were in the Entrance Hall, and she couldn't help but feel comforted by his warm grasp. "Meet me at the edge of the Forbidden Forest behind the greenhouses in fifteen minutes. And take off that ridiculous cloak." He left her standing there alone before she even realized what he was doing.
He was going to leave without her.
She shed the cloak immediately, gathering it in her hands as she ran out the door as fast as she could. She barely remembered that she was still supposed to be in the library and used her momentum to jump into a bush. Sudden bush movement startled two Ravenclaw second years and they scuttled away quickly. From deep in the leafy stomach of the bush, Hermione spotted Malfoy heading towards the greenhouses.
Without giving any thought, she darted through the stand of bushes that hugged the castle. Hermione sprinted across the open area to the first greenhouse, tucking herself behind the edge. Turning to continue on so she could catch Malfoy before he left, she stifled a scream when she found him standing right behind her. He raised his eyebrows at her reaction and looked ready to laugh.
"You ready to go?" he asked quietly.
"Wait, you're…you're not going to leave me?" Hermione stammered.
He gave her a dubious look. "I thought about it, but came to the conclusion that company—even yours—would be better than going all that way alone." She closed her mouth on an indignant comment, giving him a warning look.
"It's about 2 right now. If you want, we can walk part of the woods rather than flying it all?" Hermione was grateful for the offer, but in the end declined, saying she'd rather they get there as soon as possible. At this, he looked at her funny. "You do realize we're going the long way to the Manor, right? Because we have to bypass the big cities and we'll have to walk in some places. Where there's sufficient cloud cover, we'll be able to fly high enough to not be seen, and I'm counting on some of that." Hermione followed his gaze to where clouds darkened the distant sky.
"Let's go," Hermione said acceptingly.
"Okay then. Get on the back," he said, mounting. Hermione slowly did his bidding, holding onto his waist tightly.
And so they were off. Draco took them again through the forest at a breathtaking pace, flying about 8 or 9 feet above the ground. They zipped past a few of centaurs talking, though Hermione didn't think the pair of runaway Hogwarts students had been seen, as their backs were all turned as the three centaurs were examining something between them. After the centaurs, Malfoy twitched the broom up about another two feet just to be sure they were better hidden in the trees and they continued on their way.
Neither of them made any attempt at conversation as they rode. Conversation wouldn't have made it to the other person at the speed they were going, and they were unwilling to shout to each other to be heard. Hermione knew she clung too tight to Malfoy, but he didn't seem to mind, and didn't say anything. Exhaling slowly, she gave herself up to him, and in that moment gave him all her trust to get her safely to his Manor. Slowly, her grip on him loosened into a relaxed but firm grip, and she kept her eyes closed against his back.
He must have noticed the difference because she felt him twist around briefly to look at her. She squinted up at him through eyes she would rather have closed. He gave her a short smile, and she grinned back, snuggling into his back for protection and warmth as he turned to face forward again. It had happened really quickly, but it felt like forever, and she could still see the warmth of his smile and the brightness of his gray eyes from behind her closed lids.
She suppressed a shiver as she remembered the last time his eyes had looked so bright. It brought back pleasant (and terrifying) thoughts of a night in a tub with him, and she remembered how close he'd been to her on that day, and the feel of his arms around her…the pleasant warmth of his breath on her…. She smiled serenely against his back and relaxed even more.
Hermione thought as they rode, and her thoughts always came back to the boy she leaned comfortably against. He had slowed the pace a bit, from their rushed speed before, and now went at a more moderate speed. With the comfort of his body and the warmth of the sun on her, she thought she might even be able to fall asleep, if they didn't dismount soon.
Just as she was dozing off, a branch caught her leg and jerked her awake. Instantly, her arms tightened around Draco's waist, only to realize that he was setting them down. "Sorry," he muttered as if he didn't mean it, and then she remembered that they had almost kissed and that he was being a sore prick about it. She swung herself off the broom angrily.
"Why are you being such a…a…brat about this!" she said, stumbling over what to call him.
"About what?" he snarled, holding the broom tightly at his side.
"You can't just act as if it didn't happen!" Hermione screeched, frustrated and hypocritical. That was what she had planned on doing.
"Yes, I can," he said snottily. Before she understood what she was doing, her open hand hit his cheek with a resounding smack.
"No. We almost kissed," she said, her face burning with anger, "and we probably won't ever have that happen again. It was an accident, nothing more. And you are going to ignore it and treat me as you were treating me before it happened," she snapped. He looked at her, agape, and his cheek showed a vivid red handprint. She noticed his hand was reaching for his wand, and glared at him fiercely, "if you hurt me at all, you're going to hear from my father about this."
Malfoy's eyes widened and his hand dropped away from where his wand was. He was clearly frightened of the Dark Lord. But in the instant that his fear flashed in his gray eyes, it was gone, replaced with an anger that was all for her. His lips pursed, and he stomped off through the trees. Hermione sighed at his back, coming to a decision. She would get him back to normal. She had all day and all night. She would do this. With a knowing smirk, she traipsed off after him, thinking, watch out, Malfoy. I'm going to get Draco back.
And it was only after she thought this, that she realized she'd been calling him Draco in her mind when he was…well, decent around her, and Malfoy when he was being a prat. She grinned at his back and suddenly she saw the trees had abruptly stopped. They stood on a hill overlooking a small town. Malfoy stripped off his Hogwarts robe and held out his hand for hers. She obeyed, handing him her robe, and he walked a little way down the edge of the trees.
"Aha!" he murmured. She caught up to him and saw a tree marked with "DM" on it. He mounted his broom and rose a little, tucking their robes in a hole halfway up the tree trunk. He's left the school before, she thought as he dismounted from his broom grinning. Pulling the wand from his pants (muggle jeans, she noticed), he shrank his broomstick and tucked it into a pocket. She looked down at her own knee-length skirt and blouse and shrugged. They would pass for muggle clothing.
Without a word (he was probably still smarting from her smack, and though the lines had faded, they were still upon his face, and most likely still being felt), he turned and headed down the hill. Grimacing, Hermione followed him. This wasn't going well. She caught up to him and began to talk.
"So…er…how's school going for you so far?" she asked slowly. He didn't answer, only gave her a steady, dismissive gaze before turning away again. "Finished all your homework?" she asked. He didn't even look at her this time. "So, which classes are you taking this year?" she said. Not an answer. He didn't even blink. She decided to try a different tactic.
"So, how's your father? Having fun in Azkaban?" she asked slyly. By her tone, there was no malice in the words. It was as if she didn't know who his father was or anything about him besides that he was in Azkaban. But she could tell her words had an effect on the boy next to her. His eyes seemed to lock down, and his face became as still as stone.
"I wonder how well they feed prisoners in there," she mused innocently, wondering how far she'd have to take this before he spoke. "It must be a nuisance to have them reading your mail all the time. You wouldn't be able to have any private conversations with anyone." When he said nothing (though his mouth did tighten a little), she began to despair. Maybe he wouldn't ever speak, and would just get so mad at her that he wouldn't say anything! Cautiously, she prodded on her last card, "I wonder if they got the Death Eaters back." She saw him clamp his jaws on a remark and knew she would get him. Just a little more… "It would be a pity if they made your father go mad before I even got to meet—"
"You bitch!" Malfoy exhaled, turning to face her. Oh dear, she thought miserably, I think I went a little too far. "How dare you speak of my father!" he spat on the ground next to her foot. "You ignorant little Mudblood. How would you like it if your father went mad in Azkaban!"
This got her angry, and she stiffened. "Do not speak of my father."
"Oh, you don't want me talking to you about your blood father? He was an annoying muggle, without magic of any sort, and he deserves to die for that!" he said. She agreed with him, and grinned at him, and the look of surprised confusion that crossed his face was priceless.
"You're right, my father does deserve to die. But not for that," she said in the silence that followed his comment. Malfoy looked stunned.
"You…you don't like your father?" he asked slowly.
She just gave him a look that said as clearly as words that she didn't just not like him, she loathed her father.
"Why?" he asked, clearly unable to comprehend why anyone would hate their own father.
Hermione's jaw clenched. She didn't want to talk to Malfoy about it. In fact, she didn't want to talk about it at all, she wanted to go out and do something that would make her father angry.
"Tell me?" he asked, and though his tone wasn't pleading, she knew he was begging her to tell. He wants to understand, she realized.
An idea hit her. "I'll tell you if you quit treating me like gum on the bottom of your shoe and treat me as you did before…" she spoke around the lump that arose in her throat, "before we almost kissed." His breath hissed out, but he seemed to consider the offer. Looking warily at her, he nodded.
"I hate my father." Her jaw clenched just saying that part of it. "And over the summer, he…" her voice failed her and she swiped at angry tears, hating them. "He was having an affair with another woman. A woman almost half his age," she said furiously. "He betrayed me and my mother. I hate him."
"But…" Malfoy said, obviously still confused. And Hermione thought that she saw a glimmer of Draco in his eyes.
"No. No buts. I hate him. I've been working all summer to undermine his authority over me. I hate him," she said fiercely.
"What do you mean working all summer? What exactly have you been doing?" It was Draco this time, and he looked slightly alarmed.
"Nothing too bad," she said, not quite meeting his eyes. "I just got a couple things pierced, a tattoo, came home drunk, went partying, broke curfew," she said casually. His eyes narrowed slightly.
"Is that all?" he said suspiciously. She nodded.
"Well, a few others, but they were minor. Little things like eating upstairs and stuff," she said. He shrugged at this.
"But why do you hate him so much?" he asked her, still not understanding.
Hermione shook her head. "If you don't understand now, you probably won't, no matter how well I explain it," she said, somewhat disappointed. She had kind of hoped she would be able to talk to him about this and have him understand.
Malfoy turned to her, and she stopped walking. "I want to understand. Please. I just don't see how someone can hate their own family, or at least their parents. I can see how you can dislike your family members, but you still love them in the end, right? I don't get how you can hate your flesh and blood as you do."
"He betrayed us. That's why. If your father went around your back and sold you and your mum out to the Ministry, and then you two were arrested for being Death Eaters, wouldn't you hate your father?"
Draco actually thought about this. The silence between them stretched for nearly five minutes, and as they came on the outskirts of the village, he finally spoke. "I don't think so. No. I would not hate him. I would not love him, I wouldn't like him, but I wouldn't hate him," he said slowly. "I can't hate the person who made me, who raised me."
This gave Hermione pause. She stopped, and looked into Draco's beautiful gray eyes. How could he not hate? "You hate Harry though, don't you?"
"Yes," he hissed maliciously.
"Why?" she said harshly.
"Because he ruined the people my father thinks of as brothers," he growled.
Hermione smiled. "That's exactly it. Exactly. He betrayed your family—though he didn't know it—and so you hate him. And it doesn't matter whether you are related to him or not. You hate him. That's what I feel for my former father. But," she continued brightly, "I have a new father now, and he would never betray me." Draco, at her side, nodded, and they continued their walk through town.
"Malfoy, would you have left me at school?"
He long stride paused for a moment, then he continued warily, "I thought about it, but decided that it would be really boring journey to make alone."
Hermione laughed. "You don't mean boring," she teased, "you mean lonely."
His jaw tightened, and for a moment Hermione thought he was mad at her. But then he gave an exasperated grin, and she realized he'd only been trying not to smile. "Yes."
They traveled through the town quickly, and Hermione realized this might actually be a fun outing. She had forgotten completely the consequences of leaving school midday with Malfoy, and her heart was light in her chest as the unlikely pair walked along through the roads of the town.
Ginny sat down at the dinner table across from Harry and Ron. They each looked furious, and she said, "What's wrong, guys?"
"Gone. Again," Harry snapped. Ginny paled. Hermione was gone again? Already? She stood up, and the second and fifth year she'd squeezed between glared at her for not settling down. Ignoring their looks, she scanned the Slytherin table. Pansy, looking just as irate as Harry and Ron, was arguing wrathfully with Crabbe and Goyle, who were cowering and looking stupid. Malfoy was nowhere in sight.
Her suspicions were confirmed then, Hermione and Malfoy were having relations—she just didn't know what kind. She smirked gently to herself as she settled down between the two thoroughly annoyed students again. Oh, this would be wonderful blackmail. And she happened to know a few things about her brother—like his long-standing crush on Hermione—that could be remedied with this information. Maybe Hermione would just happen to have a crush on her brother as well…
'Cause every pane of glass that your pebbles tap
Negates the pains I went through to avoid you
—Fall Out Boy "Chicago Is So Two Years Ago"
