Title: Loving Zoe
Author: AngelicTorture
Disclaimer: I own nothing and no one but Zoe.
Rating: PG
Distribution: litafics on lj.anyone else ask and you shall receive
Notes: Response to challenge by andonly on Litafics on livejournal. challenge was john and lita have a one night stand before she leaves the wwe and she ends up pregnant but doesnt tell john. 5 years later and their daughter is sick and the only person who can help is john. Song lyrics are from If Only by Hoobastank.
Summery: What would she do for the sake of her daughter?
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I thought it wasn't wrong, to hide from you, a simple truth
I was scared
I felt it all along, but it hurt too much, for me to share
If only I
Had been less blind
I'd have someone to hold on to
If only I
Could change your mind
If only I had known
If only I had you.
Lita sat up and glanced over at the man sleeping soundly by her side. She sighed and pushed her red hair behind her ears before slipping quietly out of bed and getting dressed. John Cena turned over in his sleep as the redhead pulled on her boots.
"Goodbye John…" she whispered before placing a light kiss on his forehead and leaving his hotel room.
She knew he wouldn't wonder why she'd left while he was still asleep, they'd both agreed that it was going to be one night with no strings. Lita went back to her own room and got her bags before heading downstairs to check out just like she did everyday. Today was a little different; she wasn't a WWE diva anymore.
4 weeks later the former diva was pacing the floor of the bathroom in her house in Sanford. She was absentmindedly biting her nails as she waited for something to happen to the small white stick that was sitting on the edge of the sink. She stopped pacing and held her breath as she picked up the offending object.
"Oh crap…"
Lita looked at the little stick in her hands but no matter how hard she stared at it she couldn't change what it said, she was pregnant.
"What the hell am I gonna do Trish?" a slightly panicking redhead said into the phone she was holding to her ear.
"The first thing you're gonna do is calm down…are you totally sure you're pregnant? The test might be wrong…"
"1 might but 3? And I've spent the past 2 weeks throwing up every 5 minutes…I'm sure Trish"
"Have you told John yet?"
"No and I'm not gonna"
"Why? Li if he's the father then he needs to know"
"He is the father but you know as well as me that he doesn't want kids…its better for everyone if he doesn't know"
"Well I guess it's your decision…sorry Li but I have to pick Randy up from the airport. I'm sure everything's gonna be fine. Call if you need anything"
"Thanks Trish. Tell Randy I said hi"
"I will Li…I'll call you tomorrow. Bye"
Lita flipped her phone closed and sat down. Could she really do this? Could she be a single mom?
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8 months later
"Aw she's so cute Li" Trish smiled as she cooed over her friend's newborn daughter.
"She is isn't she?" the redhead giggled as she cradled the tiny bundle of pinkness in her arms.
"Are you sure you don't want to call John?"
"I'm sure…he doesn't need me messing up his life and we don't need him"
Lita sighed and gently stroked her daughter's cheek.
"I guess you know what's best Li…so what's this little angel called anyway?"
"I've been thinking about this for a while…I finally decided on Zoe Jade. What do you think?"
"Aww I think its perfect Li"
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5 years later
"Zoe…Aunty Trish and uncle Randy will be here soon" Lita called upstairs to her daughter.
"Coming mommy…"
The little girl came running down the stairs, her long red curls bouncing around her shoulders. Lita smiled at her daughter, it was Zoe's 5th birthday and the little girl was wearing her favorite pink party dress. Her big blue eyes sparkled as she looked at the presents piled up in the middle of the room.
"Mommy can I open one of my presents now?" Zoe asked hopefully.
"Don't you want to wait for Aunty Trish and Uncle Randy?"
"Please mommy…just one"
Lita considered it for a few seconds before smiling.
"Ok but just one"
"Goodie…I'm gonna open this one" the little girl said excitedly as she picked up a box wrapped in pink paper. Her tiny fingers quickly tore off the paper, the little redhead giggling loudly when she saw what was inside, it was a pink fairy outfit with a silver tiara and matching wand.
"Thank you mommy"
"You're welcome sweetie"
Lita smiled as she picked her daughter up in her arms and kissed the top of her head.
The door bell rang and Zoe ran to answer it.
"Aunty Trish…Uncle Randy" the little girl squealed happily as she jumped into Randy's arms.
"Happy birthday Zozo" Trish said as she ruffled Zoe's hair.
"So how old are ya now anyway? 50? 60? 100?" Randy asked with a cheeky grin.
Zoe rolled her blue eyes.
"I'm 5 Uncle Randy"
"5? Wow that's almost as old as Mae Young" Randy laughed.
"I'm not as old as you are Uncle Randy…you're really old"
"Ya know who's even older than me?" Randy asked.
"Who?"
"Your mommy" Randy said with a smirk as Lita walked past them.
"You'll pay for that later Orton" the redhead returned his smirk.
"You're funny Uncle Randy but mommy's funnier"
"Zoe what you mean is mommy's funnier looking than me" Randy said before the redheads hand connected with the back of his head.
"My hand slipped…" Lita shrugged when Randy looked at her.
"Your mommy's mean Zoe…" Randy said with a pout.
"Come on Zozo, you can show me your birthday cake" Trish said as she rolled her eyes at her fiancé and best friend and took her goddaughter's hand.
3 hours later Zoe had opened all her presents and had fallen asleep snuggled into a large teddy bear Trish had given her.
"Do you want us to stay till you get her to bed?" Trish whispered as Lita gently scooped her daughter up in her arms.
"No its ok, its getting late anyway. Thank you for coming guys"
"We wouldn't have missed today for the world Li, we'll call ya tomorrow" Randy said as he took Trish's hand.
"Bye" Lita said quietly as she watched them leave then carried her sleeping child upstairs.
The walls of Zoe's room were painted lilac and pink with small silver stars on the ceiling. The room was full of teddy bears and toys, everything a little girl could want. Lita managed to get the little redhead undressed and into her pjs without waking her. She settled the little one in her bed and tucked the covers around her.
"Goodnight princess, I love you" she whispered before placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. She walked quietly to the doorway and listened to her daughter's soft breathing. Lita wondered for a second what John would think of the little girl if he knew about her. Would kids still seem such a scary concept if he knew he had one?
Lita woke up to silence the next morning which was strange; Zoe was usually up before her mother, playing with her toys. The redhead got out of bed and walked to her daughter's room. She pushed the door open quietly and saw her little girl still asleep in her bed.
"Zoe…its time to get up honey" Lita gently brushed her daughters hair away from her face and noticed how pale the little girl looked.
"Zoe sweetie wake up" she shook the little one lightly.
"Baby this isn't funny…you're scaring me…wake up Zoe"
Lita lifted her out of bed and had to fight not to scream as Zoe's tiny body hung limply in her arms. She carried her daughter downstairs and laid her on the couch. The redhead's hands shook as she picked up the phone and dialed 911.
The ambulance only took 2 minutes to get to them but it felt to Lita like the longest 2 minutes of her life. She sat helplessly watching as the paramedics worked frantically on the little one.
"Its ok baby…mommy's right here, don't be scared sweetie" Lita repeated over and over to her daughter as she was put in the ambulance and taken to the nearest hospital.
Lita stood outside the Zoe's hospital room, silent tears falling from her eyes as doctors worked to find out what was wrong with her little girl. A kind looking nurse took Zoe's details then Lita started pacing the floor. She'd been walking in the same spot for 10 minutes when a grim faced doctor came out of Zoe's room.
"What's wrong with my daughter?"
"It looks like there may be a problem with her heart. We're still running tests but I believe she may have a hole in her heart"
Lita had to catch her breath.
"You'll be able to fix it though wont you?" the redhead asked softly.
"Honestly…we're not sure. There is surgery but we'd need to wait until Zoe's a little stronger if we can"
"How could this happen? I don't understand how she could be so sick and I didn't see it…"
"The hole in Zoe's heart has probably been there since she was born and as she grew so did it. There's no way you could have known, any symptoms she might have had would probably just have looked like a cold or fever which every child gets…" the doctor replied sympathetically.
"Can I see her?"
"Of course…she'll be very sleepy and she's hooked up to some monitors and an IV"
Lita walked softly into Zoe's room and had to hold back a sob when she saw her normally bright and bubbly 5 year old looking so tiny and fragile as she lay there. The redhead sat in the chair by her daughter's bedside and held her small hand in her own. The little girls eyes fluttered slightly but she didn't wake up.
"Mommy's here Zoe…everything's gonna be fine baby, I promise…" Lita whispered softly. A nurse walked quietly into the room and wrote something on Zoe's chart.
"Would you like me to call anyone for you? Her father?" the nurse asked warmly. Lita thought for a second, she did need someone here with her but there was no way she was going to call John.
"Its ok…I'm gonna call a friend, I wanted to wait until Zoe was settled first"
"I can sit with her while you call if you like, so she doesn't wake up alone" the nurse said kindly.
"Thank you. Mommy's gonna be right back baby, I'm gonna call aunty Trish and Uncle Randy"
Lita picked the phone up and dialed Trish's number.
"Hello" a sleepy sounding Randy answered.
"Randy its Lita…I need you and Trish to come down to the hospital…" the redhead said quietly.
"What? Hospital? Why are you at the hospital?"
"It's Zoe…there's something wrong with her heart" Lita's voice broke as she said the words.
"We'll be right there Li…do you need us to bring anything?"
"Just some clothes for me and Zoe…and bring her binky bear, she hates sleeping without it…" she let out a sob.
"We'll be there before you know it…don't worry Li, Zoe's a fighter"
Lita hung the phone up and wiped the tears from her face with the back of her hand, she took a deep breath as she walked back into her daughter's room.
"Uncle Randy and Aunty Trish are on their way and I asked them to bring your binky bear…" Lita said quietly to her still sleeping child. The nurse smiled at her.
"I'll leave you 2 alone for a little while, if you need anything just press the call button"
"Thank you" Lita smiled weakly. She sat down and gently stroked her daughter's soft deep red hair.
"Zoe…I'm so sorry you're going through this baby…I wish I could take all this pain away from you"
Lita stared at her daughter as she slept, she could see so much of John in her. She had his nose, his dimples, and his blue eyes. She even had his stubborn streak. Without realising it Lita was crying again.
There was a soft knock at the door and Trish appeared, her eyes were red and puffy.
"Li…how is she?" Trish asked softly as she pulled her friend into a hug.
"I don't know Trish…I thought I was gonna lose her…I almost did…" the redhead sobbed.
Randy placed the bag full of clothes he was carrying on the floor and pulled a small golden coloured bear out of it. Lita took the bear and put it under the covers next to Zoe.
"Look baby, its binky bear. Uncle Randy and Aunty Trish have come to see you"
"Hi Zozo…" Trish said softly.
The little girl's eyes fluttered open.
"Mommy…"
"Hi baby…you gave us a scare sweetie" Lita said as tears ran down her cheeks.
"Sorry mommy"
"Oh…baby you don't have anything to be sorry for…"
Lita sat on the edge of her daughter's bed and stroked her hair.
"Am I sick mommy?"
Lita sighed.
"Yes baby but its ok cause the doctors are gonna make you all better" Lita forced a smile on her face, the last thing she wanted was for Zoe to see her upset.
Zoe fell asleep again quickly; Randy sat with her while Trish took Lita outside so the redhead could get some air. Trish sat with Lita while she let out all the tears she'd been holding back.
"Its ok Li…I'm sure she's gonna be fine, Zoe's a strong kid…"
"The doctor thinks surgery will fix what's wrong with her heart…"
"Well that's great news Li…"
"It would be…if I could afford it. My health insurance sucks and my savings are mostly tied up in Zoe's college fund and the trust fund I set up for her…and don't even think about offering, you guys have got a wedding to pay for"
"Zoe's more important than that…there is someone who could help…" Trish said quietly.
"Oh no, I'm not asking John…he doesn't even know about Zoe, how am I supposed to ask him to help?"
"Li, whether you want to face it or not John has a legal responsibility to her"
"I said no Trish…I'll sell everything I own to pay for this surgery if I have to but I don't want John involved in this"
Lita stood up and walked defiantly back into the hospital.
Trish sighed as she watched her friend walk away.
"I'm sorry Li but he needs to know…" Trish said under her breath as she pulled her phone out and dialed John's number.
"Hello?" John answered.
"John it's Trish…there's something you need to know…"
"This sounds kinda serious blondie…what is it?"
"I don't wanna do this over the phone…how soon can you get to Sanford?"
"Sanford? Why are you in Sanford?"
"I'll explain everything when you get here John, so how fast can you get here?"
"I could be there by tonight I guess"
"Good, when you get here come straight to the hospital, room 224"
Trish hung up quickly before John could ask any more questions.
"I know you're gonna hate me for this Li but Zoe needs him" Trish sighed again and walked back into the hospital.
Zoe woke up a few more times but each time was only for a few minutes. Every time Lita thought she couldn't cry anymore another fresh wave of tears stung her eyes. It was getting dark and Trish was starting to wonder where John was.
"Li, I'll be right back, I have to make a call" Trish said before leaving the room. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and dialed John's number again.
"Where the hell are you?" the blonde asked when John answered.
"I'm just outside the hospital but I still don't understand…"
"Good, stay there…I'll be out in a second"
She hung up again and headed for the hospitals main entrance. It didn't take her long to find a very confused looking John Cena.
"Are you gonna tell me what the hell is so important that I had to drag my ass all the way up here?" John asked.
"Well I guess there's no easy way to put this…you have a daughter John, she's 5 years old and right now she's lying in that hospital and she might die" Trish said bluntly. John stared at her. His mouth opened and closed a few times like he was trying to say something but couldn't.
"What? How? When?" was all he finally managed to say.
"You are a father. As for how? John do you really need me to explain that part?"
"How can I be a dad? This doesn't make sense…who's her mom?"
Trish took a deep breath.
"Lita…"
John's jaw almost hit the floor when he remembered the night she left, the night they slept together.
"Oh my god…"
John ran his fingers through his short dark hair.
"Why didn't she tell me?"
"Is it really that surprising that she didn't? Every time anyone asks you about having kids you do the typical guy thing and freak out. She didn't want to tie you down with a kid you didn't want" Trish said softly.
"How long have you known?"
"Since Li found out she was pregnant…"
"And you never thought to tell me? Does Randy know?"
"He knows…it wasn't my place to tell you, lit asked us not to say anything"
"So why tell me now?"
"Because Zoe needs surgery to fix something that's wrong with her heart…Li can't afford the surgery and she won't let us help…"
"Her name's Zoe?" John said quietly.
"Yeah…Zoe Jade and she's beautiful. Come on, I think it's about time you met your daughter" Trish said softly as she took his hand and began to lead him into the hospital.
"Trish I don't know if I can do this…maybe Li had the right idea about not telling me…I'm really not ready to be a dad"
"Sorry John but you're just gonna have to get over it, Zoe needs you…and even though she'll never admit it, Li needs you too"
Trish opened the door of Zoe's room slowly.
"Li, there's someone here to see Zoe…please don't be mad at me…"
Lita gave the blonde a puzzled look until she saw who was standing at Trish's side.
"John…"
"I told him everything Li…I'm sorry but I had to"
John stepped slowly into the room and his eyes fell on the little pale redheaded girl in the bed. His heart broke and melted at the same time.
"She's gorgeous Li…"
Lita burst into tears.
"I never would have denied her Li…I'm sorry you had to go through all of this on your own…I'm gonna pay for the surgery and anything else she needs and don't even think about saying no"
"Mommy…" the little voice said softly.
Lita wiped her tears away as she looked at her daughter.
"Sorry baby, I didn't mean to wake you…go back to sleep honey" Lita said softly before kissing Zoe's forehead. The little girl's eyes traveled over the room and fell on the stranger standing next to her aunty Trish. Lita followed her daughters gaze.
"Sweetie this is John, I used to work with him before you were born"
"Hi Zoe…I hear you aren't very well but I'll bet the doctors are gonna make you all better really soon" John said with a smile.
"Mommy I wanna go home" tears began to shine in the little girls big blue eyes.
"I know you do baby…I know"
Randy and Trish stayed with Zoe while Lita went outside to talk with John.
"Why didn't you tell me Lita? You could've called me or something…"
"What would you have done if I had?"
"I would have been there for you and her"
"You never wanted kids John…it wouldn't have worked, you'd have ended up resenting her and I didn't want my little girls life starting out like that"
"Maybe I didn't want kids but I've got one now and I'm not about to turn my back on her when she needs me" John said.
"And what happens after the surgery? When she's better? Are you just gonna breeze back out of her life? Being a father to her means you're there for her everyday no matter what, not just when she's sick"
"I want to be there for her but we've gotta take it one step at a time, you've had 5 years to get used to being a parent, I've had 5 minutes"
Before Lita could say anything the monitors and alarms in Zoe's room started going off. Lita turned pale as she stood frozen to the spot, watching doctors rush into her daughter's room. One of the doctors came over to her with a form in his hands.
"It's seems that Zoe's condition has worsened. We need you to sign the surgery consent form"
"Does she have to have the surgery right now?" a shaky Lita asked.
"I'm afraid so, if we wait any longer it may be too late" he pressed the form into Lita's hands. The redheads hand shook as she signed it. 2 orderlies wheeled Zoe out of her room.
"Don't be frightened baby…mommy will be right here when you wake up"
Lita watched helplessly as her little girl was wheeled through a set of doors towards surgery, leaving the redhead in the middle of the hallway, tears streaming down her face.
Everyone sat nervously in silence and watch the clock in Zoe's room. Lita was rocking herself back and forth slightly, her knees pulled up to her chest. She looked exhausted and broken. Trish had curled up in a chair like a cat; her head was resting on Randy's shoulder. John was sitting as far away from the others as he could. All he could think about was Zoe, that he could lose her before he even had a chance to get to know her. He didn't blame Lita for not telling him, he'd never exactly come across as a very paternal person and he'd said himself more than once that he didn't want kids. Karma was a bitch.
Zoe had been in surgery for 6 hours and Lita had barely moved, she just sat staring at a spot on the floor, Zoe's binky bear grasped tightly in her hands.
"Li I'm going to get something to drink, do you want anything?" Randy asked softly. Lita shook her head. Randy kissed Trish's forehead before walking out the door.
10 minutes later on of Zoe's doctors walked quietly into the room. Lita held her breath as she waited for him to speak.
"We had a couple of close calls but I'm happy to say the surgery went very well, she isn't completely out of the woods yet but it looks like she's going to be fine"
Lita let out the breath she'd been holding in as relieved tears spilled down her face.
"When can I see her?" the redhead managed to ask.
"As soon as she's settled in the icu which shouldn't take too long. She'll probably sleep for a while yet"
"Thank you" Lita felt like kissing the doctor, she was so happy.
4 weeks later
Zoe had been home for almost a week and was doing well; she was almost back to her old self. John had kept his word and paid for all of Zoe's medical bills. He'd also taken some time off work so he could be with Zoe; he'd spent everyday with her at the hospital. He couldn't believe what he'd been missing out on for all those years, he knew he still had a long way to go but he felt like he was bonding with his little girl. He was getting on well with Lita too, even though he knew it was mostly for Zoe's sake.
Lita was sitting on the floor with Zoe, they were surrounded with toys and neither redhead had ever looked happier.
"Mommy can we get a puppy?"
Lita laughed at her daughter's directness.
"I don't see why not…you'll have to help take care of it though"
"I will mommy…Uncle Johnny, mommy said I can have a puppy" the little girl said excitedly as she ran over to John. She'd started calling him Uncle Johnny during her first week in the hospital.
"What kinda puppy do ya want shorty?" John asked as he picked his daughter up.
"A white one"
John laughed.
"Can we get my puppy now?" Zoe asked.
Lita looked at John.
"Hmmm…ok"
Zoe giggled as the 3 headed out to Lita's car, none of them showing any sign of how close they'd come to losing Zoe.
