I don't own any of the Tamora Pierce characters

Thanks to Ally and Pinky for the anonymous reviews, I wish you were all members so I could just send you a reply whenI get the review, but there we go, thats the way the cookie crumbles right? I thought about making Gavin blonde, but I decided against it, Matthews blonde, Gavins a trampy git! didn't want them to be similar, and thats not being discriminate against black haired people so you all know lol, its just the colour I made him . . . have I blabbered enough yet?

Lol, ok here we go!


Matthew found Ivy in the practice courts, swinging her sword around in a silver blur. He quietly approached her from behind, then put his arms round her waist. Two nearby Pages gave him a funny look, knowing that he was Ivys knight-master. Matthew ignored them. She wouldn't be his Squire once they were at war, people might as well find out about them, and a small, typical male part of him wanted to show off to Gavin. Ivy stopped and rested her head against his shoulder, looking up and dropping her sword on the floor, it narrowly missed Matthews foot, but he ignored it and tightened his grip on her, resting his forehead against hers. The two Pages laughed. Matthew shot glares at them. "Get lost or you'll have to watch kissing as well!" he growled. They hesitated, then ran off laughing. Matthew breathed in deeply then looked down at Ivy who was looking at him with a questioning gaze. "Not now!" he said, knowing why she looked at him as she did.

"When then?" Ivy asked. "I'll find out soon anyway."

"Later," Matthew said quietly. "Just let me hold you." he turned her round and crushed her against his chest. Ivy said nothing and hugged him back, trying not to wince at the pain of his grip. He finally let her go and bent down to kiss her, capturing her mouth with his. Ivy kissed him back and slowly tightened her grip around his back. After several minutes, she took her mouth away, resting her head on his chest and trying to blink the tears away. She noticed the slight wetness on a patch of her hair and looked up to see tears running from Matthews eyes. She instinctively buried her head in his shoulder, and let down the small barrier she had managed to keep up to stop her eyes leaking. They clung together for what may have been hours, tears falling shamelessly, mingling as their heads touched. Only when Raoul and Buri found them did they -reluctantly- pull apart and walk back inside.They walked with Ivys parents to Jonathan and Thayets chambers. Inside they found Jonathan, Thayet, Alanna, George, Gareth, Cecilia, Numair, Daine, Keladry and Dom. All five couples stood with their arms wrapped around each other.Raoul and Buri walked over next to Jonathan, hugging each other tight. Matthew took Ivys hand and pulled her to him, directing a questioning look at the other people in the room.

"It's a sad time when I have to call all of my closest friends and family into a room with me for a final drink before we head to war." Jonathan stated gravely, "tomorrow we'll all begin getting ready for this war. Raoul, Alanna, Gareth, Keladry and Matthew will all get ready to go into the front line. George will be sorting out the spying unit of our army, Daine will be flying into Scanra to try and turn as many animals on their owners as possible. Numair will be sorting out our mages, Dom will be sorting out the Kings Own so that we have an extra unit of warriors, and out wives and partners will be having perhaps the most strainful of all, sitting at home laden with worry." The others in the room all looked at each other. Ivy, Matthew noticed, was frowning,and he thought he knew why.

"Squires aren't coming Ivy." He whispered quietly in her ear. He pressed his hand into the small of her back when he felt her tense. "Don't make a scene here, I'll explain later." Ivy looked at him carefully, hesitated, then nodded and put herself in the crook of his arm. Matthew sighed and kissed her forehead as Jonathan continued to speak.

"But at least we can still enjoy one night together." he motioned to the glasses on the table in front of him. "I ask you all to take a glass and raise them in toast; to family and friendship." All of them picked up a glass.

"Family and friendship!" they murmured, then drank from their glasses. Matthew kept his arm tight around Ivy the whole time, holding her against him. Ivy didn't protest. She let him, breathing in the smell on his shirt. The other couples in the room were doing much the same. Looking around, all of them realized just how serious this war was going to be. There was no certainty that any of them would make it back to see their wives or partners. There was nothing to tell them that even if they did return there would still be a relationship left to work for. War not only killed people in battle, but if they managed to survive, it could kill their souls. A few years away could mean that they lost their partner for ever. The thought caused Matthew to put his glass down and pull Ivy to him even tighter, pressing them together. Ivys arms went around his back as she buried her face into his shirt. Matthew bent slightly and kissed Ivys forehead.

"I love you Ivy," he murmured so that only she could hear. Even so, the other couples seemed to follow suit, all embracing and whispering to each other. Within minutes, they were somehow hugging and shaking hands with every person in the room. None of them knew quite why, but there was a ripple of understanding going through the whole room. It felt somehow right to grasp arms, kiss cheeks and hug anyone in the room. But beneath the sense of friendship and warmth, there was another, lingering sense, of finality. . .


It was late by the time Ivy and Matthew arrived back at their rooms. They and Raoul remained the only half-sober people who had been in the group. The others had drunk plenty of wine, and it had resulted in several embarrassing stories slipping from mouths which were not supposed to be heard. These included Jonathans version of how Alanna had lost her virginity to him -on another occasion, it might have resulted in a slight tinge of jealousy from George, but today there was a loud laugh from everyone in the room. There was also the rather embarrassing story of Ivy threatening a foot soldier with a stone at the age of seven. The foot soldier had actually been her training master. Ivy and Matthew had taken this as their cue to leave, and had walked back to their rooms. Matthew kept his hold on her the whole night, not letting her go at all. As soon as they had entered their rooms and shut the door, he brought his mouth down on hers. She sighed and kissed him back, absently stroking his back. Matthew pulled away slowly and rested his head against hers.

"I love you . . . " he whispered, his voice shaking as he tried to hold back more tears. Ivy couldn't trust herself to speak, she merely nodded. They kissed again, then fell backinto thebed. With her monthlies over, Ivy had no hesitation in making love to him several times, trying to show him in actions what she couldn't in words.


It was dawn on Saturday. Matthew had already left the room for breakfast, but Ivy hadn't gone. She felt sick. After today, she might never see him again . . . at least, she might not see him alive. Everytime she looked at him it brought some silly thought to mind. She had woken up to hear him relieving himself in the chamber pot, and had felt a sick realisation that she might not ever hear that noise when she woke up again. Then she had watched him get dressed, and tried to take in every inch of his body, so that she could remember what he looked like if he died. She lay in bed, hearing footsteps in the corridors and trying to block them out and tell herself it was a normal day in the palace and that there would still be hundreds of knights here later. But nothing seemed to be normal anymore. The last four days had been a blur of hurried plans. Ivy had seen little of Matthew except for in the evenings when he was too tired to talk. Ivy rolled over and focused on the window, blocking out the voices behind her door. She didn't realise that the door had opened and that Matthew had returned until his hand ran down her arm.

"Hey." he whispered, lying down next to her and wrapping his arms around her. Ivy turned back over and smiled shakily at him.

"Hey." she managed, then rubbed her leaking eyes and snuggled into his chest."Don't go!" she whispered.

"Ivy, we've talked about this! I have to . . . I . . ." his mouth was covered by her hand.

"Say you're ill or something, go later on, just don't go yet!" Matthew looked down, not wanting to look in her eyes and see the pain and pleading in their depths.

"Me going later won't make it any easier for either of us Ivy!" he whispered and pulled her against him. "I have to go." The finality in his voice was enough to tell Ivy that even if she continued pleading, he wouldn't stay. She buried her face in his shoulder and said something into his shirt. It sounded like 'I dub doo!" but Matthew knew what it meant.

"I dub doo too!" he teased quietly. Ivys head jerked up as she grabbed a pillow and smacked his head with it. Matthew laughed and tickled her just above her hips. She squirmed as he moved to lie on top of her. "That'll teach you to whack me on the head with a pillow now won't it?" he whispered into her ear, then kissed her neck slowly. Ivy sighed and closed her eyes. After several minutes, Ivy started to speak.

"I'm going to miss you!" she whispered. Matthew stopped and pulled back.

"I'm going to miss you too!" he said. "So how about we make up for it now?" Ivy smiled and nodded, then let him press his lips to hers.


"I'll be back!" Matthew promised as he clipped his sword onto his belt. Ivy nodded and wiped her streaming eyes. A large hand rested on Ivys shoulder and she turned to see Raoul, clad in chainmail. She threw herself into his arms, just as Raouls arms went round her back, crushing her. When he pulled back he looked at her, his face shining with pride, and tears.

"I'm so proud of you Ivy." he whispered. "You've made me the proudest father in this whole world." he kissed her forehead. "If I die out there -and I might, Ivy, I'm not as good as I used to be- I want you to know how proud I am of you, and how much I love you." Ivy nodded and stood on her tiptoes to kiss her fathers cheek.

"I love you too Dad!" she whispered. He held her for several minutes, then let her go and kissed her cheek before going back over to Buri. Matthews arm went around her shoulders and his lips went to her forehead.

"He'll be fine." he whispered, gently rubbing her shoulder. "He'll be back before you know it." Ivy nodded and turned to him. Their eyes met for a second, then his mouth was on hers, warm and reassuring.

"Mount up! You have ten minutes!" Gavin of Stone Mountains voice split the air. There was the sudden sound of hurried goodbyes, last whispers of undying love, beforethe knightsbegan to mount up. Alanna, Raoul, Kel, Dom, Gareth, Numair and George all came over to give Ivy a hug before mounting up. When they were alone in the shadow of a nearby tree, Matthew took Ivy's necklace in his fingertips.

"If I was to die .. . " Matthew started. He took a deep breath then went on. "If I die, will you still wear this?"

Ivy stared at him. "You're not going to die!" she said with the confidence she wish she felt.

"But if I did?" Matthew said quietly. "Would you?"

Ivy nodded, blinking back tears. "Of course I would." she whispered. Matthew smiled at her, then leant down to kiss her.

"I love you!" he said quietly. "I'll never stop!"

Ivy smiled shakily. "I love you too." Matthew reached out and stroked away her tears with a thumb. Ivy closed her eyes at the touch of his hand, then threw herself into his arms, hugging him with much more force than was neccessary. Matthew hugged back, then found her lips. They kissed swiftly, and Ivy felt their souls merge together, and knew with a depth of certainty that she would never find anyone who would love her as much as this man did, and she would never find a man who she could love as much as she loved this man.

"Mount up Tirragen!" Gavin roared. Matthew made a rude gesture over his shoulder at his General, then kissed Ivy one last time, before whistling for Magic and jumping onto his back.

"I'll be back!" he promised again. He leant down and stroked a strand of hair away from Ivy's face. "I love you!" he said.

"I love you too!" Ivy said. Matthew looked at her lovingly, then kicked Magic into a trot to catch up with Numair and the others. Ivy watched as he rode outof the gates, wondering if he wasriding out of her life.


Hmm . . . what do you think? Please tell

Mage of the Heart