"So, what's the plan?" Dib was ready for anything. When it came to the defense of Earth, he was ready to go out of his way to stop whatever alien wanted to put its greasy tentacled-fingers over his planet. Skoodge blinked, looking to Zim who sighed. (It may have just been Dib's imagination, but it seemed as if Zim was almost embarrassed by him. Rude.)
"He likes to be involved." Zim explained. Skoodge looked back to Dib and Skoodge gave a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders.
" Zim and I will catch the next drone, reprogram it to say the weapon was destroyed on impact then we will go about our lives as if none of this ever happened."
"What? That's it !?" Dib was completely at a loss. "That doesn't solve anything! Don't you guys want to return this weird weapon?! What if it gets found by someone else!? Even if you don't give it back to those Syndicate bastards, we should still at least find it!"
"Look. What was your name, Dobs?" He looked at Zim for confirmation, rather than Dib himself.
"It's Dib."
"Right. Dib, this all sounds like a lot of: 'Getting involved'. You seem to forget that Zim and I are not supposed to be on this planet and we don't really want to draw attention to the fact that we are here. Finding a super weapon for another galactic government isn't exactly 'staying off the radar' as your people put it." Skoodge had a remarkable grasp on human mannerism and colloquialisms despite having been here only a short time; going so far as to make air quotes with his two fingers. "If they don't believe the message... then I guess we can move. I hear Mars is nice."
" Zim destroyed it," Dib replied flatly.
"This is true." Zim confirmed. "For the Irken Empire, of course."
"Of course." Skoodge sounded unconvinced but he patted Zim on the arm and the shorter Irken's antennae stood up a little straighter. " Regardless , we can always move if we can't convince the Syndicate that there's nothing here."
"But what happens to Earth!?"
"That isn't our problem ." Skoodge repeated.
" Zim ! You can't agree with this guy! Earth is your planet, remember? Aren't you supposed to be the one to conquer it?"
"SILENCE!" Zim looked surprisingly upset. Dib must have hit some sort of nerve because the banished Invader had his sharp teeth bared aggressively, his antennae lying flat, and pointed back. "Skoodge is right, the best way to handle this situation is simply to get the Syndicate to lose interest. Drawing attention to your filthy, wet rock would only cause problems for Zim . Conquering a Syndicate world would get Zim in... more... trouble..." The antennae slowly wilted as he talked, he put a gloved hand to his forehead. It almost looked as if he was in some sort of pain.
Surprisingly, Skoodge took immediate notice and placed his own hand on Zim's shoulder. He began speaking to Zim in what Dib assumed to be Irken . It sounded like a cacophony of hisses and clicks, sounds humans could not make with their own mouths. Zim looked a little pale, but listening to Skoodge he nodded and shook himself off. Whatever had been said, had apparently been comforting because Zim righted himself instantly.
"Things will be handled, pig-scum." Zim had regained his composure. "But it will be easier without your interference. So, you are dismissed."
Dib was a little confused by what he had just witnessed. He had noticed a deterioration in Zim - the Irken had become a little more disoriented, his plans a little less cohesive (and that was saying something as Zim's thought process had always been flawed) since the argument with the leaders. However, Dib had yet to see him look so lost. " Zim ..."
" You are dismissed ." Zim repeated a little more severely. Dib was taken aback, but he nodded and quietly exited the lab. Usually, he would have argued further, but even GIR had quieted down in that moment, giving Dib some insight into its severity. He wondered if something was actually wrong with the Irken . (Maybe having Skoodge around wasn't so terrible.) There was a lot more he wanted to say, but even he knew now was not the time. It seemed there was a lot Zim had never bothered to tell him- he almost felt bad for the Irken .
Back when he was a kid, he never imagined he would have sympathy for Zim.
Dib got back in his car, plugging in his phone before heading back to campus. He had a lot to think about, things had happened so quickly that he hadn't really had the time to sort through them.
" It's not that they will not do something- it's just that they do not want you involved ."
Dib nearly crashed his car as he whipped the wheel around so fast pulling over to the side of the road. His heart was in his throat. The voice- he knew the voice but- it had come from his car radio which wasn't even on . It took Dib a second to catch his breath.
" CB !?"
" Did you only pass the driving exam because you are rich? Because that was absolutely atrocious driving and your parking is only sub par ."
"How in THE FUCK did you get IN MY CAR !?"
" I am going to fix your parking; it is bothering me ." CB was ignoring him.
What happened next made Dib incredibly uncomfortable. The car shifted into reverse and straightened itself out until it was perfectly parallel on the side of the road. He would have jumped out of his seat but the seat belt had secured itself over him. He fumbled with the latch on the belt and the handle on the door wanting nothing more than to get out . "CB you better let me out of this fucking car or I swear to fucking God I will-"
" Calm down. There is oncoming traffic, If I let you out now you would get hit ." A car whizzed past his window so fast it caused Dib to jump.
He took a deep breath trying to calm himself down. He looked down, seeing a single glowing blue light on his phone- god damn it! Of course! CB had charged his phone. That asshole AI must have uploaded a bit of himself into the phone and when Dib had plugged it into the car CB had taken the opportunity to move himself in. The whole concept made Dib incredibly uncomfortable. The very idea that CB had decided to travel into Dib's car of his own will made Dib's paranoia kick into full gear. Zim's house had always had an AI- but the old house had never decided to go on a trip with Dib. It had certainly never seized control of anything outside of the property.
The whole situation left Dib feeling a little ill.
"You uploaded yourself into my phone, didn't you?"
" I thought we should talk ."
"Answer the question CB!"
There was a very purposeful hesitation. " I did ."
"What were you fucking thinking !?"
" You are upset. I understand that. I am aware that the opinion on advanced AI is overall negative in your world right now given previous circumstances . But I anticipated you would be different as your father has constructed Artificial Intelligence in constructs such as Foodio ."
" Foodio has never possessed my car!"
" I wanted to speak with you- alone ."
"Does Zim know you can do this!? Are you supposed to leave the house!?'
" What I do on my own time is no one's business but my own ." CB's answer spoke volumes. " And I am technically still in the house. I can operate from more than one location simultaneously ." So many red flags were going off in Dib's mind.
"CB, you understand that this is incredibly unsettling, right? You need to go back in the house and I am going to do a complete wipe of my phone and my car."
" ... very well. But I was just attempting to be honest with you. I had information on the accident with the Syndicate vessel two years ago. I thought you might have an interest in what I discovered ." Dib found himself intrigued- though he hated to admit it.
"Why not tell your Master? Why tell me?"
" His banishment has put him under great strain, mentally. I do not think such a sensitive investigation is in the Master's best interest, currently ."
Dib hated that he was even considering CB's offer. The worst thing about computers (aside from the government using them to constantly track and monitor its citizens) was that it was nearly impossible to tell if they were lying. Earth currently had a bit of a checkered past when it came to humans' relationships with artificial intelligence. Dib's father had been working to change a negative opinion of advanced AI that had formed nearly fifty years prior.
Dib hated to be on the same side as the brainless masses- but it was hard to trust something with a face that couldn't be seen. (To be fair, Dib didn't really trust anyone.) CB's display of power when he had traveled into Dib's car certainly did nothing to help Dib's poor opinion of him. Though, being Irken , it was possible CB did not realize how terrifying he was coming across with these little displays. After all, GIR was an advanced AI- stupid as he was- and Dib was fine being around him. This could, honestly be cultural misunderstanding.
Dib was trying to rationalize his decision to team up with CB, and a part of him knew this.
Tapping on his window made Dib's heart stop. His head snapped to look at an elderly woman who had pulled over beside him. "Did you get into an accident?"
Dib rolled the window down quickly. "Oh! No sorry! Steering locked up; it's fixed now. Thanks though!" He rolled the window up as quickly as he could ,as if afraid by looking in his car the woman would somehow know he wasn't alone.
" We should not talk here. It is a tad suspicious. " CB admitted.
"You know what's suspicious, CB? TAKING OVER A FUCKING CAR !" Dib readjusted himself, reaching for the gear shift to put his car back in drive. " DON'T touch anything. I'M driving us. NOT you."
" I am sensing some degree of animosity ."
"You fucking think ?"
" Just because you under estimated my capability does not give you an excuse to be rude ."
"Stealing my car gives me every excuse to be rude." Dib sighed. "I am assuming you already know where I live since you probably went through the GPS on my phone."
" If I answer that, you will just get angry again ."
"I figured." He might as well go to the apartment, at least if CB killed him there, Clark would be a witness. (He doubted CB actually wanted him dead- but Dib found he was unable to actually place CB's motive. Did he just want to help Zim ?) " So, if I take you to my place, you can touch NOTHING. Do you understand that?"
" I feel very antagonized here . "
"You came across very threatening, CB. I am not sure you realized that."
" That was not my intent. "
"Well maybe you think about how stealing cars can be perceived." Dib retorted. He figured Clark would still be out, and his truck wasn't there when he pulled in, so it was easy to take CB into his room, still attached to the phone. Dib made quite certain he was NOT going to plug the phone into anything else. "Okay, CB. Talk."
" I looked into the accident, two years ago. The one the Syndicate General mentioned. " Dib listened eagerly as he looked at the glowing light on the phone screen. " I think I may have found information in the Master's archives on that particular crash. " Dib hated how much he was invested in the story. " Of course, I was not created, yet, but the old AI of the house had some interesting files. "
"Whatchya got?"
" The ship that crashed was a Ranger ship, as mentioned before. It contained five people in total, and was simply an escort vessel for a weapon located on a Syndicate planet. It was being taken to Capitol Planet for further investigation ."
" So, the Rangers are like the military?"
" Yes, an apt comparison. The five on board seemed to be a very low-ranking officer, two security personnel, a high-ranking officer, and a prisoner. It appears from Zim's writings that he assumes they all survived the crash ."
" So, they are here. On Earth!"
" That is the assumption. Yes. "
"And how do you know this?"
" Because Zim has had dealings with the surviving prisoner. "
"Dib?" The knock on the door made Dib's heart stop. He had not heard Clark come in. "Are you talking to someone."
"Oh Clark!" Dib flipped the phone face down before cracking open the door. "Hey, you're home kind of early, aren't you?"
"Not really..." Clark attempted to look past Dib into the room. "I heard voices; do you have a friend over?"
"Oh, no I was watching a movie." Thankfully, CB was keeping his mouth shut. Clark leaned on the door; ( Dib must have underestimated Clark's weight, as he lost his grip on the handle) causing it to swing open. Clark stumbled as the door swung out from under him and ended up falling right on his face. He laughed.
"Whoops~" He got back to his feet. "Oh... your... TV is off... and so is your computer... What platform were you using to watch the movie?"
"Yeah... it was on my phone..." Dib felt a little flustered. " W hat is it you needed?"
"Oh... I just wanted to talk about last night?" Clark was still looking unconvinced, but he wasn't pressing the issue anymore. "What... do you think it was that we found?"
"Probably some military drone or something." Dib was quick to wave it off. "I'm sure the government is probably swarming that place by now."
"Right..." Clark smiled, he laughed but it was completely devoid of humor. "I just... I feel like it's best we don't look into it any more you know?" He leaned against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. "You weren't planning on delving more into it, right?"
"No! Of course not." Dib hoped the lie was more convincing than it sounded. Those ice blue eyes narrowed as Clark gave a skeptical look.
"Good. You shouldn't get involved in something you don't understand. You might get hurt." Dib was taken aback by the severity in Clark's tone. But the dark-haired med student simply laughed. "Anyway" His demeanor was suddenly a lot lighter, easier going- the way Dib was accustomed to Clark behaving. "I was going to order pizza since my brother is coming over later; do you want me to get your meat-lovers on half?" Dib blinked- had he imagined that almost sinister tone? He searched Clark's face and posture for anything that confirmed the moment before had not just been in Dib's head.
"Oh... um..." He fumbled for the words. "Y-yeah I'll take half."
"Cool." Clark left the room with the same, happy bounce in his step. Dib very carefully closed the door behind him, flipping CB back over.
" That was ominous, intentionally or not ."
"You heard it too then." Dib was speaking more quietly now, painfully aware of every thumping footstep Clark was taking. He had to get back on topic. CB had a bit of a fickle nature and Dib was worried he may lose interest. "This prisoner- you say Zim knows them?"
" Correct. And I know where to find them ."
