"How did you know!? Our disguises were flawless!?" Zim stood there, completely aghast as he looked down the barrel of an unfamiliar type of gun. The hair on the back of Dib's neck stood on end- his heart raced in his chest to the point he thought it might burst.

"Well even if I didn't have X-Ray vision, there have been a lot of context clues." Clark spoke, hands trembling as if he wasn't quite sure what he was doing , himself. "The name Zim is very Irken and that AI on Dib's phone has a very Irken personality- and it openly referred to its creator as Irken once or twice."

"How did you hear-"Dib spoke up to defend himself.

"My hearing is very, very good. And I don't think you know how loud you are. I knew this was coming; I just hoped that you would change your mind about outing me like this, Dib." He looked... genuinely hurt. "I'm not mad, just disappointed. I guess we're not as close as I thought." His voice shook a bit and he seemed to be fighting to keep a poker face.

Dib felt awful, but he was accustomed to pushing others away. Sometimes heroes had to burn bridges- Dib just happened to burn a lot of them "I did what I had to do."

"But I haven't done anything! You're the one who brought Irkens to me ! So, what are you planning to do now, Dib? Put me in a lab? Dissect me? Report me to your government? See? I can make accusations against you too! It works two ways!" For someone who claimed he wasn't angry, Clark sure sounded pissed.

"No! I just had to know what you were up to. I'm keeping my planet safe!"

"Working with Irkens is a dumb way to protect a planet!"

Skoodge cleared his throat. "Yes, Irkens that you are currently waving your laser gun at. So, before you accidentally shoot us, what exactly is your rank? Isn't there a Syndicate rule that indicates you must properly identify yourself before an arrest?"

"I don't have to tell you shit until you identify yourself to me!" Clark's grip on the weapon tightened as he seemed to have been slightly distracted by Dib and only now seemed to remember who was actually at the barrel-end of his weapon.

"You're awfully young, you're a cadet a best." Skoodge determined, looking Clark up and down with a generally unimpressed expression. "Are you some kind of intern? Go get me some coffee."

"Ha! I'm not an intern, dumb ass!" Clark sneered. "I'm a doctor!" And then the realization of what he said seemed to hit. "... Fuck." Credit where credit was due, Skoodge had weaseled Clark's rank out of him through taunting.

" So, what are you gonna do then, doc?" The Irken seemed unimpressed. "Have me diet and exercise? Take me to medical jail? Report me for violations against HIPPA?"

"I'm a combat medic!" Clark retorted.

"Fictional position!" Skoodge countered. "You literally made that up, just now."

"I j- I mean... I-" Clark was clearly getting flustered. "When did an Irken get a sense of humor anyway!? It's not like Irkens to be so cheeky."

"I downloaded it! So I can go all day, Space Boy!"

"Hey! That's my line!" Dib interjected .

He was quickly cut off by a loud: "Shut up Dib!" from both Skoodge and Clark. Dib didn't take it personally, Clark and Skoodge seemed to both be quite heated and the young investigator figured he was the last thing on their mind.

"Face it, Doctor, you can't do a thing. As a medic you have no power to arrest me, or my companion." Skoodge put a triumphant arm around Zim who more or less looked annoyed by the whole ordeal as it unfolded before him.

The door to Clark's room flew off its hinges as Clark's brother slid into the room, another futuristic looking weapon in his hand. "He can't, but I can." Clark looked back at the shattered door in pieces on his floor.

"Dude, I have to pay for damages, you know that, right?" He glared at his brother as he looked over the damages. "Where the hell have you been? I texted you ages ago! Were you just hanging out in my room!?"

"I wanted to make a cool entrance." Conner flashed a badge toward the two Irkens, ignoring his brother's complaints. "Conner Rodgers, Security Officer."

"That is not your real name." Skoodge replied flatly.

"Of course not. What sort of disguise would that provide!? None of us are using our real names." Conner, despite his dramatic arrival, seemed to be decent at his job. "Who would do something so stupid?"

"I don't like the way you're looking at me." Zim squinted at the two Syndicate thugs.

"Insults aside, you two don't exactly have a reason to arrest us." Skoodge regained his composure after being a bit startled by the sudden addition of a second alien Invader. "It's not illegal for us to be on this planet. This is not a Syndicate world."

"You're right, but we have reason to believe you've been cooperating with a prisoner of ours and endangering the planet locals- which goes against everything the Syndicate stands for. I mean... technically you're not doing anything illegal- yet- but that's enough to at least bring you in for questioning." Conner seemed to have a better grip on the situation than Clark who had immediately lost his temper with Skoodge's constant prodding.

"And you think we don't recognize your name: Invader Skoodge ." Clark was now taking a stance behind his brother. "That name is pretty much synonymous with the success of Operation Impending Doom II. You're being here is a threat in and of itself!"

"It's a common name on Irk." Skoodge shrugged.

"I mean that's fair; you don't look like the guy on the posters..." Clark looked thoughtful; Conner elbowed his brother.

"Of course it was Skoodge !" It was now Skoodge's turn to elbow his companion as Zim came readily to his defense . "Do not nudge ZIM!" Zim huffed. "I was defending your honor!"

"Much appreciated, but now is really not the time." Skoodge sighed, rubbing the bridge of his fake nose. Dib was getting a little frustrated as he watched the two rival , alien factions bicker back and forth. He had honestly expected a little more gunplay from something as twisted as they Syndicate. However, neither Clark nor Conner was really quick to pull the trigger. (In fact, Clark looked a little uncomfortable holding the gun at all).

"Enough fooling around! We have to do something before these guys kill us all for knowing their secret!" Dib very much wished he had an advanced space weapon to pull out of a bag- but he had to settle for just being the tallest one in the room and hoping that would be intimidating enough. (He had his doubts; the odds of another height-based hierarchy were astronomical. Then again, so were the odds of him having an alien for a roommate- so Dib supposed odds didn't matter in the end).

"That's not really their thing." Skoodge waved for Dib to step down.

"Torture then." Dib narrowed his eyes at Clark. "You're disgusting ."

"I..." Clark looked down, but it did not appear to be out of shame. He just looked confused. "W... what?"

"Or are you Syndicate Bastards more into brainwashing?" Dib wished, again, that he could wave a gun in Clark's face to emphasize his point- but the alien seemed to be slinking back all on his own. He actually lowered his weapon for a moment- Conner did not follow suit.

"Dib, do you actually know anything about the Syndicate?" Clark looked angry again and Dib felt himself losing a bit of his fervor - but he reminded himself that his roommate was here to destroy his planet (not be his friend) and the fires reignited inside him.

"I know enough! I heard about how your people like to assimilate planets!" Dib retorted. "How long until Earth ends up like the others!?"

"A long fucking time if everyone behaves like you." Clark grumbled but quickly turned back to address Dib. "Okay then, genius, tell me what exactly happens when we assimilate a planet. I'm just curious. You've done your research, so tell me."

"I..." Dib opened his mouth and then closed it again.

Fuck.

Clark actually had a point, as much as it killed him to admit it. Dib didn't really know what happened after- he only knew that it was something the Syndicate did.

"It's awful." Zim, thankfully, spoke up. "The Syndicate gets all involved and then everyone gets universal healthcare and they share all their scientific advancements with the other Syndicate worlds. It's actually the worst."

"Yeah-" Dib cut himself off as he actually listened to Zim's description before turning to face the Irken so quickly that the tails of his trench coat whipped around his legs. "Wait! WHAT !?" He was completely flabbergasted.

"Syndicate worlds are so much harder to conquer because they gain access to all the Syndicate resources. Plus," Zim didn't seem to realize why Dib was upset "with that stupid treaty it makes worlds they touch off limits for Irken Invasion."

"They're fucking GOOD GUYS !?" Dib was completely at a loss. He had assumed he was hunting some sort of mind controlling dictatorship when he had apparently been tracking down members of some intergalactic peace corps.

"It's a matter of perspective." Skoodge replied dismissively. "They have their flaws too."

"Every government has flaws." Conner shot back.

"Clark I-"

"No Dib! I don't want to hear it." Clark held the gun back up but it wasn't really pointed at anyone. Dib saw Conner push the barrel back to the ground since Clark seemed to be focused on other things. (Probably for the best in case he accidentally fired a shot). "I manage to save you from Q's toxin and you sick Irkens on me!? What sort of a friend are you!?"

"I thought you were evil!" He tried to defend himself.

"And I thought we were close, but I guess we were both wrong today ." Dib didn't like how much those words seemed to sting.

Q! That was right. Dib had one chance to try to make up for a mistake and (possibly) gain some new alien allies. "Clark wait- There was a weapon on your ship, right?"

"Woah Dib-" Skoodge tried to cut in but Clark talked over him.

"I... well... yeah but it wasn't our weapon!" Clark looked defensive again. "It was found on one of our satellites and we were trying to figure out its origin. For the love of- Dib I told you we aren't trying to hurt your Earth!"

"Shame it'll never be found." Skoodge again tried to derail the conversation but Dib was (rightfully) pissed at the Irkens . They had plenty of opportunities to stop him from accidentally attacking a peaceful band of alien refugees.

"Yeah yeah , I know." Dib was on a mission now. "But Q found the weapon. He gave it to the Irkens . You guys should take it back. You know, on the next probe that comes looking for you." Dib saw Skoodge's face harden even through the fake disguise.

"Wait..." Conner kept his weapon raised but his expression softened. "You guys found it!? Y-yes we would like it back."

"Well... of course." Though the expression on Skoodge's face was pleasant Dib could hear the bitterness in his voice. Dib had forced their hand. "It's only right. Zim , can you ask CB to bring the weapon. We were trying to analyze it ourselves, you see, such a strange device."

"Weapon in transport. " CB's voice came out of Zim's PAK.

"Oddly nice of you." Conner seemed unimpressed by Skoodge's tale. "Using your valuable resources to work on finding the origin of a weapon that was being used to target the Syndicate."

"Not nice; practical" Skoodge corrected, "we don't trust anything given to us by a Parasite. Would you?"

"That's fair." Conner had to admit that Skoodge's answer made sense. "And I trust that AI you summoned isn't planning to shoot us with the weapon when it comes in?"

"That would put us at war." Skoodge replied calmly.

"And also it would be messy." Zim agreed.

"And between you and me the AI is kind of an obstinate asshole. It doesn't take orders well, so I wouldn't worry about the Irkens programming a secret agenda into it. I've heard it interact with Dib." Clark half-whispered to Conner. Dib had to agree. The odds of CB following any orders seemed to be slim at best.

Of course, it did not take long for the AI to reach the campus. He was using the same robotic body that Dib had seen with Q, though it looked like it still needed some repair. Limping a little, CB handed the cube Dib had seen Skoodge hide the weapon in, over to the Invader in question. After messing with a few buttons on the side, Skoodge reached a hand in and pulled out the weapon. It was definitely the one he had seen Q hand over. Sure, Dib had only seen it for a moment, but he wasn't one to forget a piece of alien tech.

Immediately, as the gun surfaced, Clark looked a tad ill. "That thing gives me the creeps, always has." The gun fell out of his hand to the floor with a loud clatter as he took a few steps back. "Conner you'll have to carry it to the Captain."

"At least we know it's legit." Conner, reluctantly lowered his gun and took the device from Skoodge . "Thank you Dib... I guess... you tried to out us to the Irkens but... I mean... you got us our weapon back so..."

"Just do us one favor." Skoodge piped up. "Can you... not mention us to your captain. It may look bad if you say you got the device from Irkens. I don't want to cause any unnecessary drama."

"We'll see." Clark replied flatly. He followed his brother as the two walked toward the door, opening it. "You guys can go." Dib wanted to point out that it was his apartment as well... but it seemed like a bad time for semantics.

"Hey Clark look," He started to talk, but the blue-eyed alien sighed heavily as he followed Skoodge and Zim out of the apartment.

"Not now Dib." Clark wouldn't even look at him and for some reason it bothered Dib immensely as he watched him stare at the ground.

As soon as everyone was out, the door was shut and Dib was left standing with two disguised Irkens on his own campus. " That didn't go as planned, I assume ?" CB's robot body cocked its head curiously at the closed door. " Because I was only half paying attention ."

"I am surprised you actually gave up that weapon." Dib decided to ignore the bot. He had a rough enough day without having to deal with CB's insults.

"It won't matter." Skoodge replied flatly. "Getting that weapon back will probably cause more harm than good for those guys." He looked over to Dib with a smirk. "I mean, there's still the matter of that traitor, right? The one who caused the crash? Whoever that is won't like the Syndicate getting their weapon back. As far as I'm concerned, this will all work out well. We can just take the weapon once that traitor strikes and, you know, kills them. "