"Ah yes, First Officer Tak, we had received word of your arrival. We just were not expecting it so soon." Captain Rose ignored Dib's outburst as she saluted to Tak who made minimal effort to return the gesture.

"We were nearby on a mission to do boring supply runs for planets in need." She made a face. The three Syndicate Captains (her own included) exchanged uncertain looks. "But I received the message from our Tallests to come to this primitive rock! And, Zim was in it for some reason, which was confusing and dumb. I did not like that part."

"Oh, you're here about that." Captain Rose seemed satisfied.

"Of course I'm here about that. Who willingly goes to Earth!?"

"No that's fair." Carrius nodded in agreement. "We crashed here, the Irkens are in hiding, the Solar just needed supplies..."

"Um, hi?" Dib waved, trying to bring attention to the fact that they were insulting his planet right in front of him.

"Yeah, but you live here. You didn't have a choice- oh. Right." Carrius caught on after a moment. "I mean Earth is great Tak, what are you talking about?" He could not have sound less convincing if he had tried. Dib shot him a look.

"Wait a moment, you look familiar..." Tak looked up at Dib. "That hideously large head reminds me of a puny Earthling I knew when I was here last. Only that one was not so tall."

"It's me Tak. I just got taller." Dib rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"IMPOSSIBLE!" Tak looked at him accusingly. "Such a primitive, ugly thing shouldn't have gotten tall. It's just... it's just wrong."

"You know First Officer Tak?"Carrius looked over in surprise.

"Yeah. Unfortunately."

"Unfortunately!? You are unfortunate to know Zim. I am an actual Irken capable of great things!" Tak looked deeply offended by Dib's comment.

"If you're such a great Irken," Dib crossed his arms, arching an eyebrow, "why are you with the Syndicate?"

"I... well..." she faltered for a moment, her purple eyes narrowing in a clear expression of aggravation, her curled antennae lying flat. She straightened her posture (it was amazing how much less intimidating Tak was now that Dib was over six feet tall- in fact the only Irkens taller than he was, were the two Tallests. But to be fair- they were both MASSIVE- easily standing at seven foot.) "I don't have to explain myself to the likes of you! The Syndicate are a military force in their own respect. They are not Irken but they are still a strong, respectable Empire!"

"Ah yes, well that is all very flattering. However," Captain Rose seemed to deem it proper to interject. "First Officer, we did receive your transfer request to the Nova, and we are flattered that you want to join us, but you see there was a slight problem with your paperwork." Tak blinked, her antennae sticking back up in surprise.

"Wait? What? There should be no problem. I filled out so many of those awful forms!" She looked frustrated, and Dib would be lying if he said he didn't enjoy seeing it.

"It seems like you checked the wrong box on the Transfer-Request Inter-Planet Ranger Inquiry A- Subsection R, 9-12." Captain Rose was looking at the little electronic device that always seemed to be in her hand recently. "You checked: Ranger Transfer- equal office- preferred transfer immediate. You needed to check: Ranger Transfer- equal office- preferred transfer instantaneous." The form talk was boring, yes, but the expression on Tak's face was filling Dib with endless amusement. She looked ready to throw something.

"Those are the same thing!" She snapped.

"No." Captain Rose was trying to look sympathetic, but she either wasn't trying very hard, or was just bad at portraying sympathy. "They aren't. But I could see where you would think that. So, we need you to resubmit that entire form in triplicate."

"That form was twelve pages!"

"Yeah. It was." Captain Rose replied with that same fake little smile. "So if you could do that real fast, that would be great."

"Are you KIDDING ME! It was ONE BOX!" Tak let out an exasperated sigh. "I hate the Syndicate." She was trying to mutter under her breath but her anger had, perhaps, elevated her volume a little louder than originally intended.

"You don't mean that." Captain Fluorine sounded a lot more sincere than Captain Rose as she tried to put Tak more at ease.

"Yes. I do." The Irken glowered, storming past the two. "Now where are these forms!?" The two Captains followed the raging ball of Irken hate down the hallway. Captain Blitzar watched for a moment before turning to Carrius.

"We'll be on Earth Moon Base if you need us. We hear there is a really great robot."

"Oh yeah I've heard that! Moon base raves about it." Carrius replied casually.

"I would like to be the robot." Dib's pocket spoke up as CB seemed to be listening to everything from his phone. He had not really remarked on Tak (which, if his interaction with her ship was any indicator of their rapport) was probably for the best.

"No." Dib replied quickly, in a hushed voice. "My parents made it; you can't take over everything just because you think it's fun."

"We should report this to Zim, shouldn't we?" Dib and CB were interrupted as Lor finally made his way down to the landing bay.

"Oh you're here! How are things in the medical bay?" Dib immediately perked up. "I thought you would be gone for hours."

"Everyone's stable for now. I left Pawl in charge. He's seen his fair share of shipwreck injuries. Everyone should pull through with minimal scarring." Lor seemed rather pleased with himself. Dib couldn't blame him, there had been absolute chaos when he left. Still, he was a bit hung up on the names of the Syndicate once again. Fluorine and Carrius he understood. Even Lor had a bit of a 'spacey' sound (as much as the name Zim, anyway) but...

"Paul?" He couldn't help but ask. "There's an alien named Paul?"

"Well... actually is Pawl," as Lor corrected him, Dib bit back the urge to grimace- this was going to be Derick all over again, "he was the Ventrexian you saw. Nice guy, I've worked with him a lot. He's training that young Arenac- you saw there too, the one with the eight appendages."

"Yeah she helped you do surgery." Dib recalled very clearly.

"Gotta love those extra limbs. Her name was..." Lor trailed off trying to remember, Dib readied himself to be fully disappointed. "Sorry gimme a second, I was like elbow deep in a Suboon chest cavity when she said it... right! Garblarafareah."

"Right." Was all Dib could muster.

The naming conventions in the Syndicate were wild.

"CB, you have already told Zim about this, I assume?" Lor looked leaned over, speaking more at the pocket in Dibs trench coat than at Dib himself.

"I am not certain I want to." The reply was surprising.

"Why not? She heard the call to action and she came." Dib wasn't Tak's biggest fan, but CB had not really met her... well... he had met her ship.

"Her artificial personality was rude to me. Let us throw her back into space and we can join forces with a different Irken."

"No. Tell Zim Tak is here, even though," Dib admitted, "that will probably be Zim's reaction too." Dib pulled out the phone so that Lor wasn't staring awkwardly at his pocket. There was a moment of silence before a little message composed itself to Zim.

The phone immediately rang.

"It is father." CB replied helpfully. Dib rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Hey Zim."

"Tak? I thought she had like died or something!" Zim sounded quite annoyed at the revelation of just who would be joining them.

"Apparently not." Dib sighed. "Looks like she joined the Syndicate."

"Haha," Zim actually laughed out loud. "It's worse than dying, and since it's Tak who is suffering, that makes it funny."

"So are you guys going to come get her...? Or...?"

"Usually I would say you could bring her to our base... but she is terrible and I don't really want her here." Zim sounded thoughtful. "Also I have too many Irkens living with me already. Though if she is Syndicate now, I guess she'll be staying with you. That's also funny because it isn't happening to me." Dib wished Zim could see the nasty glare he was giving him. Maybe CB would relay the message. (Unlikely as the AI only seemed to relay what was important to it).

"So... we bring her to you...? Or...?"

"Very well, but be sure she is not planning on staying here." Zim hung up the phone without waiting for a response. This was typical of the ex-invader when he wanted things done his own way. Zim had a tendency to believe that if he hung up, that ended the conversation.

"So we need to get Tak to Zim's base." Dib looked to Lor for some sort of help. "Do we need to fill out forms for that...?"

"Well... Tak does." Lor gave a shrug. "But I'm sure the Captain already has her working on it. I mean it won't be much since she's only going to Zim's."

"Are there other Irkens in the Syndicate?" Dib had to ask. It didn't seem like anyone was particularly surprised by Tak being Irken, but he had always assumed the two governments to be mutually exclusive.

"A few, here and there. I wouldn't say there are a lot." Lor's response was about what Dib would expect. "Mostly they are just disgraced members who have disconnected from the Collective and we found floating in space."

"There!" Dib turned; he could hear Tak shouting from all the way down the hall. "I have filled out all of your dumb forms now let me aid my people!"

"Of course, of course, First Officer Tak." Captain Rose was assuring her as the tiny Irken walked between the two taller Captains. "We will arrange a ride for you with our newest cadet. He's that human you insulted." Tak looked in Dib's direction.

"Ah. I see you have allowed this human into your ranks. It seems the Syndicate has lower standards than I remember. Still, as humans go, I recall this one being a tad cleverer than his brain-dead counterparts, which isn't saying much."

"Thank you Tak, I'm going to take that as a compliment." Dib grinned.

"Don't." The Irken woman spat back.

"Too late, compliment accepted."

"Perhaps I can retract my previous statement about this one being smart." Tak looked to Captain Rose who simply shook her head.

"Too late, it's on the record."

"You are all terrible." Tak's eyes narrowed, her antennae going flat, back again.

"Cadet Membrane, I'm assigning you to escort Tak to the Irken headquarters." Captain Rose nodded to him. Dib had been right about his inevitable drafting into this mission. Still, it was better than working with Derick. That swarm was frustrating.

"Yes Captain." Dib looked down at Tak. It was a little odd seeing her again after so many years had passed. He recalled her being a lot more intimidating. Then again, he had grown a great deal since elementary school. It was a bit of a confidence boost to realize that he could now drop-kick the former threat to Earth. "C'mon Tak."

"That is 'c'mon Tak Sir'!" She spat back, glaring up at him. "I outrank you cadet."

"Yeah ok." Dib didn't bother correcting himself. "Zim's place isn't far. It's sort of become the Irken strong-hold recently so that's where Therron and Voel are."

"Therron and-" Tak's eyes widened. "You do not speak of our leaders so casually! They are bravely leading us in this time of crisis and they deserve respect!" It was evident from her rant, that Tak would not like how things had progressed at Zim's house. While it was true that Voel still commanded some respect. Skoodge's constant insistence that the Tallests were no longer deserving of their titles had really taken hold on the group. Plus, Dib wasn't sure how much effort Therron was really putting into this 'leading in a time of crisis'.

"Uh huh." Again, Dib was dismissive of her as he led Tak out back to a sleek little car that the Syndicate had upgraded with their own technology. It was the equivalent to Skoodge's ship/car before it had been damaged on the Massive. He got in the driver's seat, Tak re-adopting her human disguise as Dib started the car. "I expect you not to take this over, by the way. I feel it should go without saying... but I also greatly feel like you'll ignore that."

"What?" Tak gave him a blank look.

"Oh! I'm not talking to you." Dib showed her his phone. "I'm talking to CB." Tak looked at his phone, then back at him.

"Is this some sort of psychotic break...?"

"No. CB, he's in the phone. He's Zim's security system."

"And he's in your cellular device?" She lifted one antenna skeptically.

"Yeah, he hangs out in there a lot." Dib explained. "Say something CB."

Nothing.

"And he's... real?" Tak was giving Dib a look as if he had sprouted a second head.

"Yes he's real! He's just being weirdly quiet right now. He does this, he's a huge ass."

"Okay, that part sounds believable." Tak would at least concede that point to Dib. Tak was quiet again for a moment, looking out of the window at the passing buildings and making a face of visible disgust as she surveyed her surroundings. "I haven't missed this place at all. It would have made a fine snack canister, and nothing else."

"You haven't changed." Dib remarked dryly as he continued toward Zim's house. He was just glad it wasn't a long drive. He pulled up in front of the lawn, the little blowfish in the yard eyeing them as Dib exited the car and made his way to the front door. Before he could knock it was opened by Zim who looked Tak up and down.

"You really did join the Syndicate. That's hillarious."

"Fuck you Zim." Tak pushed her way inside.

"Hey where's CB?" Dib looked around but saw no sign of the android body.

"He's avoiding Voel, I saw him in the lower decks watching TV with GIR." Zim replied dismissively. Dib pulled out his phone stepping to the side.

"Is that why you weren't talking in the car?"

"That Irken female's ship was rude to me. I had nothing to say."

"You could have said fucking hello! She thought I was crazy!"

"You are not?"

"I swear you are worse than Q sometimes."

"You do not mean that. I am delightful."

"No. I do mean that. I absolutely mean that."

CB sent a sad face emoji to Dib's phone and the Membrane clone rolled his eyes in exasperation. CB was lucky that he was a beacon of useful information. Otherwise, Dib would have gotten him out of his phone ages ago. Sometimes CB could be fun though, interesting to talk to, a fountain of Irken lore. But this was not one of those times.

"My Tallests!" Tak had made a beeline for the two looming Irkens who were currently at Zim's kitchen table eating takeout. "I am honored to be in your presence once more." She bowed her head, her antennae wiggling as the two disgraced leaders exchanged confused looks. Voel cleared his throat, trying not to choke on a taco he had been almost done consuming.

"Ah yes... you..." It was very evident they had no idea who Tak was. "We are glad you heard our message. We will be most pleased to have your skills at our disposal..."

"Yeah!" Therron swallowed a mouthful of a burrito. "Your many talents... such as...?" He looked at Voel clearly trying to figure out who this was.

"She's a janitor." Zim piped up immediately.

"NO!" Tak turned toward him, eyes blazing. "I am NOT. I was going to be an elite until Zim's STUPIDITY locked me in my room causing me to miss my exam. It was a whole thing." She straightened up turning away from Zim. "I was the one who was going to hollow out Earth and fill it with snacks for you." Therron squinted at her, trying to wrack his brain.

"I'm guessing you... failed? You should have tried harder."

"I didn't fail! Zim got in the way!"

"He's good at that." Voel went back to his food.

"I am." Zim seconded.

"I'm sorry I just do not remember you." Therron, too, went back to his food leaving Tak a little distraught.

"I tried to take revenge on Zim, steal his mission..."

"A lot of Irkens have tried taking revenge on Zim. I'll be honest you'll be hard pressed to find one he hasn't pissed off." Voel sighed. "Look, I'm sure you were great. I mean... you failed, that much is clear because we are still on Earth. But you're here now. So good for you." He looked around and grabbed a handful of chips, dropping them in Tak's hand. "Have some chips."

"You guys really don't know who I am?" She looked up at them both, clearly distraught by this revelation. Dib wasn't sure why, it was obvious the Tallests were assholes- this just never seemed to have occurred to Tak.

"You resemble no one we know." Therron patted her hand to close it with the chips still in her palm. "But I'm sure you were a great janitor or whatever so we're glad you're here now." Tak reluctantly took the chips.

"So," Skoodge spoke up making Tak nearly jump. She whipped around seeing him standing off to the side. "How exactly did you get involved with the Syndicate?"

"I wouldn't say I'm involved. I'm simply using them to advance my own status and impress the Tallests. No Irken willingly joins the Syndicate." Tak made a grand gesture toward Voel and Therron who were both watching with only mild interest.

"You want to Impress Tallest Vero and Tallest Xia?" Skoodge lifted one antenna as he crossed his arms over his chest, beady, crimson eyes narrowed.

"Tallest who?" Tak blinked. She shook her head vigorously, once more gesturing emphatically toward the two tall Irkens at the table. "No! Obviously Red and Purple."

"They aren't the Tallest right now because of that whole being declared dead thing." Skoodge replied pointedly.

"Yeah!" Zim interjected, enthusiastically. "And corpses make terrible leaders! I know this from experience, I assure you." There was a moment when every Irken in the room (and Dib) turned to look at Zim in complete confusion. The tiny ex-Invader simple smiled, blissfully unaware of the judgmental gazes.

"I heard about their being murdered from the Syndicate news channels. I, unfortunately, have been disconnected from the Collective ever since that asshole," she pointed to Zim, "threw my ship through lava and shot me into the cold recesses of space. I think my PAK took some damage, and PAK repair is not the Syndicate's strong suit."

"You were thrown through lava and launched into space?" Dib had to take a moment to process that. He had seen the damage on Tak's ship, so he knew she had been through a lot. "How are you not dead? I mean, I always just assumed you were."

"Zim left me for dead, floating in space without my ship!" Tak pointed aggressively toward Zim. Zim made a motion as if rolling his eyes.

"Oh please, you were fine. Everyone knows being jettisoned into the vacuum of space isn't lethal." He looked over at Dib, "Well for Irkens it's not. I assume you would die. Your weird squishy body isn't built for the stress of space."

"We can die if we starve to death!" Tak interrupted Zim's judgement of the human race to bring the focus back onto her.

"But you didn't." Zim retorted. "Did you?"

"Well, no." Tak grumbled. "That much is obvious-"

"Did you!?" Zim repeated a little louder.

"No I-"

"DID YOU!?"

"UGH I SAID NO YOU MOTHRA DAMNED IDIOT!" Tak shot back. Skoodge held up his hand trying to de-escalate the situation as Zim and Tak looked ready to fight.

"Tak," Skoodge spoke pleasantly, "his auditory receptors are damaged; he's hard of hearing." Tak faltered for a moment.

"That..." she looked at Zim, "that explains so much."

It really did. Dib had been nursing that theory for some time. It was good to finally have some sort of confirmation.

"Now, you were telling us how you being blasted into space somehow ends up with you being a Syndicate First Officer." Skoodge continued seamlessly. Tak nodded, taking a deep breath as she readied herself to begin.

"I was floating in the cold vastness of space, slowly staring to death-"

"It's not my fault you didn't bring snacks." Zim huffed.

"Zim, hush." Skoodge shushed him.

"When I was come upon by a Syndicate drone surveying something that had happened to two planets in your solar system a Mars and Venus." As Tak continued, Dib smirked to himself. Good to know he and Zim's little adventures had left quite a noticeable mark on the solar system. At the time, Dib had envisioned himself saving the planet from Zim with the backing of his own people. Now, though, Dib was saving Irk with Zim with the help of some sort of Intergalactic version of the DMV (but with weapons). "The drone picked up my bio-signature and I was immediately contacted by a Syndicate Lieutenant through a hologram projector asking me what I was doing so close to Earth as it was not marked for Invasion in Operation Impending Doom II."

"And you told them... what, exactly?" Voel leaned his elbows on the table, listening curiously to the story.

"I told them I was fleeing from angry Meekrob. I could not admit my true plan as I needed the Syndicate to be on my side. I said I had been attacked and they offered me to return to a nearby Syndicate base and receive treatment. All I really needed was food, and the Syndicate does have some Irken-compatible cuisine."

"It's pretty good stuff." Skoodge admitted. "I've had better on Irk, of course, but the Syndicate puts effort into their cooking."

"Oh, you ate weird, crazy stuff of Blorch." Therron made a face. "I doubt you are that much of a food critic."

"You'd be surprised." Skoodge retorted.

"Anyway," Tak cleared her throat. "To make a very long, arduous story short: I realized I could not return to Irk having been bested by the likes of a Defect like Zim. So, I told the Syndicate that I feared for my life; the Meekrob wanted me dead; I had no way to return to Irk, etcetera, etcetera. They bought the sob story and I realized that the only way to get back in the good graces of the Tallests was to rise up in the Syndicate and use their forces to take Earth, thereby making Zim an Irken criminal! He'd be arrested and I'd be promoted. The end."

"I don't like that plan." Zim narrowed his eyes. "That's a bad plan."

"Plus, I took care of the Meekrob." Tenn piped up, hanging down from one of the ceiling tiles. (Dib assumed she had a whole tunnel system through the ceiling now as both Zim and CB have told him the stories of 'ceiling sniper' and her many victories.)

"So you're not going to do the plan to turn Zim in now, are you?" Dib piped up at last. He had grown quite attached to the ball of green anger. Not to mention the fact that a great deal of the plan to save Irk seemed to be coming from his mad little brain.

"Well no. Obviously not. I was very confused about why he was giving the speech in the video. It was so obvious those inspirational words came from the Tallests! He was reading them off cue-cards. You could tell." Tak sighed.

"No I was not! I was speaking from my cardiac spooch! I had the wings of Mothra in my soul filling me with my word-vomit!" Zim retorted angrily.

"Hmm." Skoodge made a concerned face. "Maybe don't call it word-vomit?"

"Who cares who wrote the words or who said them?" Therron swept the comment aside. "What's important is that you're here!" He stood up putting a hand on Tak's shoulder. "You came all this way heeding our call to action!"

"I did, my Tallests!" She nodded eagerly.

"So we're going to give you a very important job- the most important job, in fact." Therron continued, his voice smooth and calm. "You can watch GIR."