Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi. (duh!)
The Warrior Within
"And yet roses shall bloom…
Their petals washing away the gloom of ruins."
Chapter I : Roses that bloom in darkness (Part II)
Dear Diary
Everywhere I look, darkness threatens to engulf me in its eerie depths. Pitch black darkness, as cold as death itself, freezing me to my cores, urging me to give up. Hopes shattered, dreams assassinated, I stand still defiantly before it, clutching the only weapon I have. Light. My light. A tiny speck of desperate hope that gives me power to smile calmly at darkness' face, to be patient even when I'm being thrown into the endless pits of oblivion. With defiance in my heart, I look around myself and see darkness staring back at me. Just like always.
It has been like this ever since my parents got divorced. I was four then. At that time, mother went to a conference in London. She had a freak car accident there and left this world without ever saying goodbye to me. Father got married again, to a woman he previously had an affair with. He's got kids with her and they're living pretty happily together…so I've heard. Father didn't want to take me. But he DID agree to pay a yearly amount for my expenses. Which, probably, was the only reason why my aunt Niya Takahara took me in. She's my mother's cousin…and she hated her. Result, she hates me as well. Besides, she's got her own kids to take care of. So WHY did she go all the way through the hazard of rendering me shelter? Her husband had died eight years ago. She wasn't very sure when the court offered her to be my guardian. But then she heard about the 'compensation' she'd receive from my father and she agreed. Thus she brought me to this house of hers, made me the lone occupant of this old attic and gradually turned my life into a living hell….I have this shrewd suspicion that she's trying to fulfill her grudge against my mother by torturing me. Maybe I'm just imagining things, but what the hell! I'm completely at her mercy. And she LOVES it. She loves to see me suffer. Loves to see me in pain. But I won't let her win. Each and every time she strikes me I'll present her with the same contented smile that I know, will irritate her beyond anything. My weapon. Yes. Simple, but deadly.
I won't lose. No, I won't lose to evil. I won't be overcome by darkness. Never.
Wish me luck.
------------- Yanzime Morioka
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Dinner with the rest of the Takaharas was usually an unpleasant experience for Yanzi. As she laid the dinner table, her aunt, Mrs. Niya Takahara and her twin daughters, Ayumi and Kasumi, came in. They looked exactly the same, with white-blonde hair that fell to their backs, and emerald eyes framed with long mascara-studded lashes. They took their seats on either sides of Mrs. Takahara like graceful swans. Junichi came running in a while later.
Yanzi clenched her fists and sat down on her chair. Dinner was the time the whole family got together. It was also the time aunt Niya found most suitable for bullying Yanzi, because she knew that her daughters will also join her in the torture cell.
Yanzi made a mental check of everything. She was a good cook and the food she had prepared for dinner was also good. She could tell from aunt Niya's face that she liked it, which obviously annoyed her because she won't be able to yell at Yanzi for "abominable cooking" ! She grinned to herself. The plates were clean and the table-cloth was spotless. She had personally made sure of all that.
"I wonder what she's planning to get me on this time," she thought.
"You need a hair-cut." Mrs. Niya Takahara spat abruptly, startling everybody else in the room.
"What?" Yanzi sputtered.
"You need a hair-cut. It's grown messy," she pointed at her wavy knee-long hair, a malicious gleam in her eyes.
It was as if a small explosion took place inside Yanzi's head. She had rather emotional issues with her hair. She knew from the photos she had of her mother that she also used to have very long hair. Yanzi was fond of keeping her hair long like her mother. In fact, she had her last hair-cut when she was twelve.
"Forget it. I'm not cutting my hair." Yanzi replied matter-of-factly, though she was struggling to refrain herself from shouting out loud.
"Patience," she whispered to herself inside her mind.
"Ahh. We can only imagine why," Ayumi piped up, a sneer forming on her face.
"And what can that be?" aunt Niya raised an eyebrow.
"Oh don't you see mother," Kasumi cast a loathing glance at her blue-eyed cousin. "How in the whole world can Yanzi-san get rid of her exquisitely long eye-candy hair, when she so likes to sport it around to attract the guys at school?"
"What the hell are you talking about?" Yanzi yelled, forgetting all self-restraints.
"Don't you dare shout at me," Kasumi hissed. "Everybody knows what a pathetic whore you are. You're always busy trying to make the boys fall for you. No wonder you don't want a hair-cut."
Aunt Niya's lips curled into a crooked grin. "Indeed," she chuckled, thoroughly enjoying herself.
"Yes mother," Ayumi joined in the torture, jealousy evident in her eyes. "But I feel sorry for Yanzi-san. Maybe her witchcraft isn't really that powerful. Guys don't pay attention to her, no matter how much she flashes her 'gorgeous' hair. So I'd rather suggest you give yourself a hair-cut anyway, Yanzi-san. Who knows, maybe that'll work."
The twins laughed out loud, while their mother grinned viciously. Junichi simply sat frozen, too shocked to speak at the cruelty of his mother and sisters. He didn't know how to console the victimized girl.
Yanzi herself was lost for words. She felt tears welling up in her eyes. She desperately tried to bury them back, because that'd simply exhilarate her aunt.
"No, I won't lose," she gritted her teeth.
"I see. So, that's the whole story," aunt Niya licked her lips, a smug look coming over her face. "I can't say I'm really surprised, though. Her mother was no different, either. It's only natural for her to—"
"DON'T YOU DARE TALK RUBBISH ABOUT MY MOTHER !"
The loud scream echoed throughout the room, as it gradually grew dead silent. Aunt Niya's eyes shone malevolently, her voice shaking with anger, as she spoke.
"I will NOT be talked to like that in my house. Yes, this is MY house that you're living in and this is MY food that you're filling your ungrateful little stomach with. You're being warned for the last time, girl. There won't be any second chances. Now get yourself out of my sight."
Yanzi stormed out of the dining hall shaking with uncontrollable fury, as the twin's triumphant smirks followed her retreating back.
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A star-sparkling night sky. A dingy attic. A seventeen year old maiden. Crying alone….
Yanzi was fuming through sobs, her body inflating with each heavy breath.
"I don't know how long I can take this," she thought. "The frikkin' hell, I'm a human being? There's a certain limit to my endurance…."
"What's it to them if I'm a bit…different? What's it to them if I'm perfectly contented with myself just the way I am? I never complain about life, yet life complains about me? So what if nobody wants to be by my side? What if I'm always to be abandoned? I don't give a damn…."
She felt restless. These were times she felt she needed to talk to someone. Anyone.
She couldn't reach her friends at that moment. Instead, she scrambled for the last source of comfort in her life. The only person she talked to when she was alone in the attic.
From the drawer of her table she took out a plain old hand-mirror, its glass dusty and slightly cracked in places. She stared at the mirror for some time and whispered in a trembling voice.
"M-Miboshi-san?"
For a while nothing happened. Then the glassy surface turned into a swirling mass of black and sharp blue letters appeared before her eyes.
"Hello, my dear warrior-princess. I sense distress in you today."
"Oh, it's nothing," Yanzi lied.
"Nothing."
Yanzi stared at the word for along time, then felt all her pretense suddenly being washed away. She felt herself…..giving in, all her self-defense crushing down to earth. She began to sob hysterically ads she let all the pain flow out of her. Clasping the mirror tightly, she allowed herself to get out of her protective shell for once and confess everything to the spirit that resided in that old mirror. And surprisingly enough, after she finished, she was feeling much better.
The mirror was silent for a moment. Then letters began to appear once again.
"How do you feel now?"
"Better," Yanzi whispered. "Thank you for listening."
"It's the only thing I can do. But you need not worry. It is necessary to get rid of all that is painful and burdensome once in a while. It is not a sign of cowardice. Rather it strengthens you to be prepared for more hardship in future. It grooms you into a perfect warrior. Which of course, you already are, my dear."
Yanzi couldn't help smiling despite herself.
"Why do you always call me that, Miboshi-san?"
"Because you are one."
"Right," Yanzi whispered sarcastically. Then she sighed.
"I feel like hell."
"Which is only natural."
"Could you please stop stating the obvious all the time?"
"Certainly. But then you must allow me to try and lift your mood."
"By what?"
"a story maybe."
"A 'story'! Hey I know you're pretty ancient, but I'm not really THAT much of a kid!"
"I am well aware. But this is one story I feel I should tell you."
Yanzi raised an eyebrow. "OK. Go on."
"Now that I have your permission, I shall tell you of a legend. A legend that ties four mythical lands together. A legend that speaks of four beast gods and their reigns. And a legend that tells the story of young maidens who come from other worlds to gather the warriors of star to make their own wishes come true. This, my dear girl, is the legend of the Shi Jin Ten Chi Sho. The Universe of the Four gods……………."
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