Disclaimer: Own all except for the Marauders.

To James Potter – for helping me to successfully mount a broomstick.

Section I: Introduction – Profiles of Members of Faculty

Marauder I – James Potter

Title:

Head of Department of Mischief

Given Name:

James Potter

Tolerable AKAs:

Potter/Prongs

Intolerable AKAs:

Jamsie/Prongsie (Warning: Used under strict restrictions by Sirius Black only)

Profession:

Beating the crap out of Slytherin at Quidditch, making fun of Severus Snape's sorry existence, getting rejected by Lily Evans 24 times a day, 168 times a week, 672 times a year, etcetera, etcetera.

Likes/Hobbies:

Looking at, talking about, and annoying Lily Evans, playing Quidditch, seeing Snape humiliated, seeing Snape injured, thinking of Snape's death, and patting/bathing/cleansing his broomstick – Robert the Cleansweep.

Dislikes/Hates:

SEEING SEVERUS SNAPE ALIVE AND HEALTHY, and going to the dreadful Divination classes.

Accomplishments:

Burning Professor Binn's ashes, setting Professor Dumbledore's beard on fire (which he had been thanked for), feeding Fawkes an emerald gobstone without getting caught, successfully transforming Roudolphus Lestrange into a pink ferret, skillfully tongue-tying Snape for calling Lily Evans a You-Know-What, and successfully becoming an Animagus.

(Note: Listed only recent pranks, otherwise I'll run out of parchments.)

Saddest Moments:

When he first had the misfortune of meeting Snape on his first train-ride to Hogwarts, when he got creamed by the Slytherin Quidditch team because of a bad case of thumb-thitis, and when he gets rejected (note: present tense) by Lily Evans, which is 24 times a day, 168 times a week…(refer to 'Profession' for specific numbers)

Best Moments:

When he first met Lily Evans, every time Gryffindor wins the House Cup or Quidditch game, and every time he successfully jinxes Snape and his gang.

Favorite Subjects:

Everything except for Divination and History of Magic.

Least Favorite Subjects:

Nothing except for Divination and History of Magic

Favorite Teachers:

Professor Dumbledore (otherwise known as Bumblebee),

Professor McGonagall (otherwise known as Minnie), and

Professor Slughorn (otherwise known as Sluggy)

Least Favorite Teachers:

ARGUS FILCH

Favorite In-School Pets:

Moony, Fawkes.

Least Favorite In-School Pet:

MRS NORRIS

Mortal Enemies:

Severus Snape (otherwise known as Snivellus),

and all the other losers who belong to Slytherin.

Favorite Quotes:

"S-N-A-P-E, what does that spell? GREASEY-HARIED LOSER, of course!"

"I love you, Evans!"

"Peter, my dear friend, would you please STOP TUGGING MY SLEEVES!"

"Call me Prongsie one more time, and I'll pants you, Paddie-foot."