Disclaimer: See 2nd Chapter.
A/N: I was highly disappointed with the amount of reviews I had recieved for the last chapter. It seemed like a lot of people wanted a continuation of this story yet no one bothered to review it. I'm hoping for more reviews on this chapter, otherwise I won't continue with this.
I slowly awakened from my daze and looked up at a clock. Seven o'clock. Great, I have less than an hour to get fixed up. I don't even know how bad I look; I just know it's bad. Troy upset me again, that's basically all I remember. Maybe that's just all I want to remember. After all, he broke my heart again. The pain was still there, not just from this time, but the first time as well. I promised I would never fall for him again. Who did I make this promise to? Couldn't have been myself; that's just too cliché. No one else is there for me. Well, sure Ryan is, but that's not as true anymore. He's amazing at basketball, I should be proud. Yet I still wish he could come back to me. Suddenly, he's so manly. Gone are his tight, sparkly shirts. Instead he wears jerseys or anything red and white. Disgusting. He's completely different...he's one of them. All my life, he's been the only one there for me. Now that's gone. I have no one there anymore. I began humming the song playing in my head. It's completely fitting. Ashlee Simpson. After all she's been through she should've just given up. Then again, I wouldn't have. That's what we have in common. Even when the entire world is against us, which it very well is, we don't care and just go past it. The only problem is we both have no one to lean on anymore. No love to get us through this. No happiness to look back on and nothing else to look forward to.
Who will be the one to save me from myself
Who will be the one who's there
And not ashamed to see me crawl
Who's gonna catch me when I fall?
My humming has grown to full-out singing as I find my way to my locker. How I got to that stairwell is beyond me, but I was completely out of it. The mirror in my locker must be deceiving me because I look absolutely horrid. My mascara is running, my hair is a mess, and my eyes are red and puffy. I nearly shudder at the sight of myself. I look almost like...everyone else. That just can't happen. Not when they think I'm completely content. The next lyrics in the song are completely perfect.
It may seem I have everything,
But everything means nothing
When the ride that you've been on
That you're coming off
Leaves you feeling lost.
Brush and makeup kit in hand, I headed to the girl's bathroom to perfect my appearance. All that crying was definitely not good for my complexion. After washing off the makeup that remained on my face, I looked in the mirror. A simple, plain-looking girl stared back at me. I could tell her story easily. She was lonely. All she wanted was to be accepted and to be loved for who she was. One person accepted her and loved her. For years she was perfectly content. Then, suddenly, her whole world was shattered and replaced by emptiness that tore her heart to pieces. She shut everyone out so she could never get hurt. Was it a familiar story? Of course. I sighed. Everything was back in place. My makeup was much more subtle this time. Light brown eye shadow brought out my eyes while a pale pink lip gloss made my smile picture perfect. I scoffed. That smile wasn't real and everyone knew it. Sometimes people would come along and fix me. Good luck with that. Nothing's broken, I then whispered to myself. I just like to be lonely sometimes. The final lyrics in that Ashlee Simpson song came out of my mouth as a whisper.
Is anybody out there?
Does anybody see
That sometimes loneliness is just a part of me?
Who will be the one to save me from myself?
Who will be the one who's there
And not ashamed to see me crawl?
Who's gonna catch me when I fall?
I stepped out of the bathroom and, once again, stared at the clock. Seven thirty-five. I have impeccable timing. Well, nothing left to do but wait for the hordes of people to come in. Each and everyone one had the same purpose-to be accepted. Before that Gabriella girl came, everyone was in their place. Geeks and nerds hung out with other geeks and nerds. Jocks and cheerleaders acted as though all others did not exist. Skaters were their own little clique that no one else disturbed. Then there was the greatest group of all, the drama 'geeks'. I preferred calling us the drama club. It was much less degrading. Now everyone hangs out with each other. Bolton was to blame as well. The mention of the word Bolton came to my head and I let my subconscious take over.
Flashback
"Troy, baby, what are you doing here? Our date isn't until much later. Come back in three hours. I haven't even showered!" His nose crinkled when I said that last sentence. Boy was he cute when his nose crinkled. Actually, he was just cute no matter what. Except now. Right now he looked worried. He was blinking much more than usual. Not a good sign, definitely not a good sign. Something was up. "Troy, what's wrong?" I stepped out onto the porch he was standing on. Instinctively, Ryan came up behind me and laid a protective hand on my shoulder. Did he know something I didn't? That's a yes. Troy glanced at him and Ryan nodded. He whispered words of encouragement in my ear and then walked away. I know what's going on. Of course I know what's going on. What I don't know is why.
"Sharpay, listen, I think..." My mind was reeling. Why? Wasn't he happy? Didn't he love me?
"You think what Troy?" I spat.
He looked nervous. If I wasn't so angry, I would've instead tried to make it better. It seemed he'd told Ryan before me. Actually, a lot of people at school were giving me sympathetic looks. Did everyone know before me? Why didn't I catch on? "Maybe we should end this."
"That's it? Maybe we should end this?" My tone and body language was mocking him. Those acting lessons definitely paid off. If I act mad, maybe he won't notice I'm falling apart inside.
"Please, don't make this any harder than it already is. We want different things."
"Did you take that from a movie, Bolton? 'We want different things?' We're not getting married! Is our relationship just a burden to you now? Do you want to see other people, try other things? Or is there just no spark left?" Hot tears ran down my cheeks and hit the porch.
Troy turned around to leave, but then walked back to face me. We were inches apart. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I need to focus on basketball. You want to do theater, but I don't belong there."
I slapped him. "That's your brilliant reason for breaking my heart into millions of pieces, Bolton? That we have different interests? It never stopped you before." My cold exterior was slowly cracking as tears filled his eyes. I dropped the act and slid down to the ground. My tears were silent; the only evidence I was crying were the slight convulsions I made every so often. Troy didn't know what to do. First he grabbed my hand, but I quickly pulled it away. He brushed the hair off of my face, but I shuddered at his touch. Two, three, maybe ten minutes later, I got back up. "Just go. You want it to end? Fine, it's over." My words were venomous and I could see that each one broke him more and more. Good, I thought. Maybe now he'll realize how much his words hurt me.
"Shar, please, not like this. I'll do anything to get you to understand. What can I say? What can I do to make it better? I still love you. It's just...we're different people than we were when this started out. You know it's true." The look in his eyes told me he'd do anything to take those words back. I just smirked.
We stood in silence for a few moments. I stepped closer to him and smiled. His eyes brightened and were full of home. I held back another smirk as I replied, "Yes, you're right." My sickly-sweet voice made him shiver. "We are different people now. You aren't the Troy I fell in love with. Somewhere along the way you changed. Maybe I did as well. You still love me?" A cold laugh escaped my lips. I could hear my heart breaking, but I paid no attention to it. Instead I relied on my brain which told me to act completely cold towards him. And that's exactly what I did. "Well, Bolton, I don't love you anymore."
As I turned towards the door, he grabbed my hand. "The way you say 'Bolton'...do you really hate me that much?"
Without
so much as a reply, I slammed the door in his face.
End
Flashback
That memory which once brought tears to my eyes now reinforced my cold façade. The shudder in his touch, the confusion in his voice, fueled my anger. How could he do that when he claimed to still love me? I looked up at the all-too-familiar clock and a relieved sigh filled my body. I still have five minutes to get to class. The noise of the hallways suddenly filled my ears and my head began to pound. Yet another wonderful addition to my wonderful day. I quickly plastered on a smirk and walked through the hallways acting totally aloof. "Idiots," I mumbled. None of them saw how lonely I really was. That, of course, was for the better. I don't need anyone's sympathy. I hate it when people act sorry for you; it gets so annoying. Crowds parted for me and watched me walk away in silence. At least I have power over these people. I suddenly realized how shallow I sounded. Wow, I really had changed. Too late to go back now, I reasoned. As I enter my locker combination to get my books for homeroom, a very peppy Gabriella approaches me.
"Hey, Shar!" I shuddered internally at the use of my nickname. "I just wanted to say you did really well yesterday at the auditions! I hope we both get lead parts...I heard that it's a love triangle! I think Mrs. Darbus did that so you, Troy, and I would get the lead parts! I'm so excited! Even as a not-so-lead part in the winter musical, you were amazing!" So many things were wrong with what she had said. First of all, the bitterness of what happened yesterday was fresh in her mind and I heard it in that first sentence. It was quickly replaced with obnoxious statements in an overly happy voice. Mix that in with the loving way she said Troy's name and I was extremely close to vomiting. That would be completely rude of me, though, so I held it in.
"Oh my gosh, that would be just fab-u-lous!" I mocked. She just smiled, hugged me, and walked away. For an Einstienette she was extremely oblivious at times. I just smirked as she walked away. When she turned around to wave, I quickly smiled again. Disgustingly sweet, that was how I described that encounter. I knew she was just acting so I would think there were no hard feelings. The truth was in her eyes. She saw me as a threat. Like I would ever take her precious basketball boy away from her. I had better things on my mind than him. Wait a minute, no I didn't. Whatever. Off to homeroom! I slammed my locker shut and began walking to Mrs. Darbus' room. Walking hand-in-hand ahead of me were Bolton and Gabriella. Bolton. The use of his last name makes it easier to hate him. Even though I still kinda-sorta-almost-barely love him. That can easily be hidden though. He nearly flinched when she hugged him and I almost burst out in laughter. I brushed right past them as they kissed. "Mrs. Darbus, would you please inform the couple outside that PDA is just not allowed in the hallways?" I smirked as she walked outside to yell at them.
I could faintly hear her voice. "...If you two do this in the theater, the temple of the arts...my temple...out of there as fast as you can say musicale." Sniggers could be heard around the room, even from Taylor and Chad. Gabriella and Troy then walked in looking embarrassed and a bit angry, respectively. "Now," Mrs. Darbus said as she clapped, "Today we will debate on the true beginnings of the theater." The class groaned.
About 7 hours later, a time that seemed like an eternity, the school day was finally over. I placed my books back in my locker and then checked my hair. It was still perfectly wrapped in a bun with a few tendrils framing my face. Another figure suddenly appeared in my mirror. "Bolton," I acknowledged.
"Evans, if we're now going by last names..." He paused so he could laugh at his dumb little joke. I smiled and motioned for him to continue. "Anyway, I just wanted to apologize for this morning. I just thought..."
"That's your problem. You think too much." My words had a double-meaning that only he could interpret. "Next time, try just following your heart, or your head. Whichever one makes the most sense at the time. Don't confuse what makes sense with what is easier. I followed my heart and my brain and worked hard at what I loved, the theater. See where it got me?" He grimaced slightly at the double-edged sword my cold words became. To others passing by, however, it sounded like I was simply giving him advice. "Now, Bolton, if you don't mind, I really have to get home."
He slammed his hand on a locker as I walked away, so I turned around and gave him an icy stare. "Don't bother, Sharpay. Your glares never bothered me before, and they don't bother me now. That's not who you are. I know that's not who you are."
I gave him a sweet smile. "Oh, Bolton, please tell me who I am then. I'm dying to know." I was challenging him; my eyes gave it away. After all, I meant them to.
"Fine, but it might take a while. I'll walk you home."
I couldn't help but feel a little elated. Especially since this would mean he couldn't take Gabriella home. Breaking that perfect little girl's heart was definitely a priority; I want my theater back! Theater was always my thing. No one ever could take it away, even if they wanted to. Then, out of the blue, a basketball star and a genius girl take that away from me! I'm not going down without a fight. If Troy happens to fall back in love with me in the process, that would be even better for me. I have to convince him I don't actually want him to, but still get him to walk me home. During times like this, I'm so glad my parents sent me to acting school. "Whatever. If it'll get you to leave me alone later, I'll let you 'tell me who I really am'."
"Great!" He smiled at me and I nearly melted. Even after all the times he's hurt me, his smile still affects me the same way it did when we dated. "Now, let's go." Troy linked his arm with mine. At least, he attempted to. I pulled away and whispered Gabriella's name. "Oh, right..." I heard him mumble. This walk home will certainly be interesting. I smiled at him and we headed out the door.
A/N: That's the end of chapter 3! I still can't believe you guys convinced me to make this a story. Now I like it better than "Dreams, Secrets, and True Love". Well, I hope you all liked it! I know Sharpay's thoughts were a bit mean, but we're talking about the people who completely broke her heart. Besides, the Sharpay we all know and love would not suddenly be nice just because Troy sang her a song. Trust me; I know what I'm doing! Please R&R for a faster update! At least 7 reviews or no new chapter. That's really not asking for much. Only about 30 seconds of your time. I need to know that people actually read this story or there's really no reason for me to update.
Oh, and don't worry...I haven't abandoned my other story. I'm just having a severe case of writer's block, along with the fact that I have no time. I'll try to update as soon as I can.
